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WTF, Chuck

OptimusZedOptimusZed Registered User regular
edited September 2009 in Debate and/or Discourse
Chuck Norris, roundhouse-kicking, Huckabee-backing, revisionist-history-pushing bastion of sanity that he is, has given us yet another gem.

From his blog:
As 9/12 concluded, we all heard many ways to keep this revolutionary movement going. But I was sitting back thinking there's one way we can take a daily stand and declare that as for me and my house, we will serve God and the republic as the Founders did.

If that describes you, then I suggest you fly some revolutionary flag in lieu of your 50-star flag over the next year. Post the 13-star Betsy Ross flag, Navy Jack or Gadsden flag ("Don't Tread on Me") or any representation that tells the story of Old Glory and makes a stand for our Founders' vision of America.

Of course, patriots know that the 50-star flag truly represents one nation under God and our Founders' republic, but modernists simply don't get it. So what do you say we make a statement by flying a different flag and educate our neighbors when they ask us, "Why are you flying that flag instead of the contemporary Stars and Stripes?" (If you insist on posting a modern USA flag, too, then get one that is tea-stained to show your solidarity with our Founders.)

Sure, it's an action that pales in comparison to things like threatening secession or hanging a census worker because he was a "Fed." But it's a jarring bit of fanfare to come from a group that so strongly self-identifies as "patriotic." The flag is just a symbol, but it's a fairly important symbol all things considered. And there's a long list of things we're not supposed to do with it out of respect, including soaking it in tea. You'd think someone who spent so much time pushing his twisted version of patriotism would recognize that.

We're reading Rifts. You should too. You know you want to. Now With Ninjas!

2018 Motherfucker; What Are You Doing For It?
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Posts

  • SyphonBlueSyphonBlue Anyone need healing? Heroes never die!Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    The Patriotic Party!

    SyphonBlue on
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  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Wow

    There's so much wrong in that blog post I don't know where to start

    Jesus Christ CN what the fuck man

    Hope you don't say that shit on a military post

    Rent on
  • CouscousCouscous Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whiskey_Rebellion
    Obama to show his solidarity with the founding fathers by crushing any actual attempted rebellion. Shay's Rebellion. Never forget.

    Couscous on
  • KalTorakKalTorak Way up inside your butthole, Morty. WAAAAY up inside there.Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Post the 13-star Betsy Ross flag, Navy Jack or Gadsden flag ("Don't Tread on Me") or any representation that tells the story of Old Glory...

    Come on, I know there's another flag you really wanted to put in that list, right? Don't be shy.

    Something with bars on it...

    KalTorak on
  • SyphonBlueSyphonBlue Anyone need healing? Heroes never die!Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    KalTorak wrote: »
    Post the 13-star Betsy Ross flag, Navy Jack or Gadsden flag ("Don't Tread on Me") or any representation that tells the story of Old Glory...

    Come on, I know there's another flag you really wanted to put in that list, right? Don't be shy.

    Something with bars on it...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fGiw1FDMUDc

    SyphonBlue on
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  • KalTorakKalTorak Way up inside your butthole, Morty. WAAAAY up inside there.Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Ahh, good old Terrorist Fist Jab Lady.

    KalTorak on
  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem I've got waffles and I've got beerRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    And when left-wing nuts get mad they burn the flag. Big whoop.

    matt has a problem on
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  • SyphonBlueSyphonBlue Anyone need healing? Heroes never die!Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Different Fox News blonde idiot.

    SyphonBlue on
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  • OptimusZedOptimusZed Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    And when left-wing nuts get mad they burn the flag. Big whoop.
    We do?

    Because my experience hasn't borne this out.

    OptimusZed on
    We're reading Rifts. You should too. You know you want to. Now With Ninjas!

    2018 Motherfucker; What Are You Doing For It?
  • KalTorakKalTorak Way up inside your butthole, Morty. WAAAAY up inside there.Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Really? They all look the same to me.

    KalTorak on
  • MorninglordMorninglord Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    Morninglord on
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  • nexuscrawlernexuscrawler jacobkosh Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    nexuscrawler on
  • HappylilElfHappylilElf Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    o_O

    HappylilElf on
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  • CantidoCantido Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    o_O

    Then we have an excuse to pull out of Iraq and begin counter-insurgency here.

    Cantido on
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  • CristoCristo Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Oh I am SOOOOO boycotting Walker: Texas Ranger after this

    :<

    Cristo on
    Unlucky wrote: »
    So, after having read all of his stuff, Pony's officially my hero now. I wish I could be that callous towards humanity.
  • MKRMKR Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    So it turns out Chuck Norris' beard is the strongest component of his head.

    MKR on
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    Chuck Norris can divide by zero

    Chuck Norris once ate a black hole. He said it tasted like chicken

    Chuck Norris once counted to infinity...twice

    Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did
    These jokes and others like them became a meme back in 2008, all using Chuck Norris- former star of TV Western "Walker, Texas Ranger" and of atrociously bad Bruce Lee knockoff Kung Fu films

    They were ironic "compliments" to Norris' fighting ability, most notably his roundhouse kick, which is his signature move

    Norris parlayed his internet fame into a pseudo-revival of his career, which reached his zenith when he made a fuckawesome campaign ad with Mike Huckabee, which is fuckawesome

    Norris then showed his true colors when he tried, with a modicum of success, to recruit people to follow his somewhat insane far-right rantings

    Spurred on by Fox News (which he is a frequent guest commentator on such shows as "Fox and Friends" and the Huckabee show they have now), he's recently written a blog post about, instead of putting up the Stars and Stripes, putting up earlier flags (like the 13 original colonies one, which he talked about), the "Don't Tread On Me" flag used during the Revolutionary War, and the [strike]Stars and Ba-[/strike] uh er not that one because that would be racist and he would therefore be dogwhistling. He's also recommended that if you raise the actual American Flag (the one with the 50 stars on it), that you stain it with tea to show your support for the teabaggers, those racist douches who have been causing quite a stir lately via protesting everything our current president is doing and demanding the prez's real birth certificate

    In any case what he's doing, or advocating, is really fucking offensive because 1) none of those flags are the real American flag (earlier flags in our nation's history are not considered "real" flags because they don't reflect the current number of states in the nation, and 2) fucking with the American flag in any way (via burning, staining, or tearing the current one) is considered offensive, unless you're properly disposing of an unusuable (due to it being torn, stained, frayed, or burned, or it simply is not usuable due to normal wear and tear) one

    The irony is of course the far-right fucking hates it when some far left douche burns the flag in effigy over some bullshit

    Basically, lolrepublicans

    Rent on
  • MorninglordMorninglord Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    o_O

    his post appears to be calling for the flags to remind people why the country is unified. to produce awareness. a kind of ironic education by making others go wtf.

    so....the idea that he is calling for open revolution indicates a catastrophic inability to see beyond the literal meaning of a persons words.

    again, i am an outsider, i may be missing some subtle context here. for example, i have no idea what those others flags mean or whose side they represented.

    Morninglord on
    (PSN: Morninglord) (Steam: Morninglord) (WiiU: Morninglord22) I like to record and toss up a lot of random gaming videos here.
  • KalTorakKalTorak Way up inside your butthole, Morty. WAAAAY up inside there.Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Little known fact, that bit in the US Flag Code actually reads

    The flag shall never be dipped* to any person or thing.

    *except into tea, that'll show the fascist commies!



    (disclaimer: I don't know if this is true, I got it from a Vonnegut book)

    (edit: OK it is true, acc. to wikipedia)

    KalTorak on
  • durandal4532durandal4532 Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    o_O

    his post appears to be calling for the flags to remind people why the country is unified. to produce awareness. a kind of ironic education by making others go wtf.

    so....the idea that he is calling for open revolution indicates a catastrophic inability to see beyond the literal meaning of a persons words.

    again, i am an outsider, i may be missing some subtle context here. for example, i have no idea what those others flags mean or whose side they represented.

    Well, he's calling for people to stop using the flag of our country, and start using "better" flags from "better" times. So he's saying "don't follow the current administration! Follow our wonderful founders ideals that just so happen to perfectly coincide with our ideals!"

    It's just another expression, like the "tea parties", of our lovely conservative movement patterning itself after the founding fathers even though they share little in common beyond whiteness and richitude.

    durandal4532 on
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  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem I've got waffles and I've got beerRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    KalTorak wrote: »
    Little known fact, that bit in the US Flag Code actually reads

    The flag shall never be dipped* to any person or thing.

    *except into tea, that'll show the fascist commies!



    (disclaimer: I don't know if this is true, I got it from a Vonnegut book)

    (edit: OK it is true, acc. to wikipedia)
    That doesn't mean dipped as in "put into", it means dipped as in "in deference to".

    matt has a problem on
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  • DrakeDrake Edgelord Trash Below the ecliptic plane.Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    o_O

    his post appears to be calling for the flags to remind people why the country is unified. to produce awareness. a kind of ironic education by making others go wtf.

    so....the idea that he is calling for open revolution indicates a catastrophic inability to see beyond the literal meaning of a persons words.

    again, i am an outsider, i may be missing some subtle context here. for example, i have no idea what those others flags mean or whose side they represented.

    What it means is that pretty much most of America is losing their fucking minds over something right now.

    Drake on
  • KalTorakKalTorak Way up inside your butthole, Morty. WAAAAY up inside there.Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    KalTorak wrote: »
    Little known fact, that bit in the US Flag Code actually reads

    The flag shall never be dipped* to any person or thing.

    *except into tea, that'll show the fascist commies!



    (disclaimer: I don't know if this is true, I got it from a Vonnegut book)

    (edit: OK it is true, acc. to wikipedia)
    That doesn't mean dipped as in "put into", it means dipped as in "in deference to".

    I know, I just thought it amusing.

    KalTorak on
  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem I've got waffles and I've got beerRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Drake wrote: »
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    o_O

    his post appears to be calling for the flags to remind people why the country is unified. to produce awareness. a kind of ironic education by making others go wtf.

    so....the idea that he is calling for open revolution indicates a catastrophic inability to see beyond the literal meaning of a persons words.

    again, i am an outsider, i may be missing some subtle context here. for example, i have no idea what those others flags mean or whose side they represented.

    What it means is that pretty much most of America is losing their fucking minds over something right now.
    Right now?

    matt has a problem on
    m9KVEYF.jpg
  • RUNN1NGMANRUNN1NGMAN Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    KalTorak wrote: »
    Little known fact, that bit in the US Flag Code actually reads

    The flag shall never be dipped* to any person or thing.

    *except into tea, that'll show the fascist commies!



    (disclaimer: I don't know if this is true, I got it from a Vonnegut book)

    (edit: OK it is true, acc. to wikipedia)
    That doesn't mean dipped as in "put into", it means dipped as in "in deference to".

    Also, the US Flag gets dipped all the time, in acknowledgment when another country's ship dips their flag to us.

    RUNN1NGMAN on
  • Ed321Ed321 Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    o_O

    his post appears to be calling for the flags to remind people why the country is unified. to produce awareness. a kind of ironic education by making others go wtf.

    so....the idea that he is calling for open revolution indicates a catastrophic inability to see beyond the literal meaning of a persons words.

    again, i am an outsider, i may be missing some subtle context here. for example, i have no idea what those others flags mean or whose side they represented.

    Well, he's calling for people to stop using the flag of our country, and start using "better" flags from "better" times. So he's saying "don't follow the current administration! Follow our wonderful founders ideals that just so happen to perfectly coincide with our ideals!"

    It's just another expression, like the "tea parties", of our lovely conservative movement patterning itself after the founding fathers even though they share little in common beyond whiteness and richitude.

    Why's he saying to fly alternate flags until the end of the year, then? The administration's still going to be there after that.

    I'm with Morninglord, I don't see what the big deal is. He's saying "let's fly these flags to remind everyone how we got to where we are". At least that's what the quoted bit indicates.

    Ed321 on
  • MorninglordMorninglord Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Drake wrote: »
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    o_O

    his post appears to be calling for the flags to remind people why the country is unified. to produce awareness. a kind of ironic education by making others go wtf.

    so....the idea that he is calling for open revolution indicates a catastrophic inability to see beyond the literal meaning of a persons words.

    again, i am an outsider, i may be missing some subtle context here. for example, i have no idea what those others flags mean or whose side they represented.

    What it means is that pretty much most of America is losing their fucking minds over something right now.
    Right now?

    yeah im more trying to work out "what is it this time" :P

    Morninglord on
    (PSN: Morninglord) (Steam: Morninglord) (WiiU: Morninglord22) I like to record and toss up a lot of random gaming videos here.
  • SmurphSmurph Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Right but the 50 stars flag was fine when Bush was in office. I would have figured the far-left's whole "Not My President" thing would have left a bad enough taste in conservative mouths to ensure they didn't try their own version of it when the other side had a guy in the white house, but I guess that's too much to ask.

    Smurph on
  • DrakeDrake Edgelord Trash Below the ecliptic plane.Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Drake wrote: »
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    He's like a few steps away from calling for open revolution

    o_O

    his post appears to be calling for the flags to remind people why the country is unified. to produce awareness. a kind of ironic education by making others go wtf.

    so....the idea that he is calling for open revolution indicates a catastrophic inability to see beyond the literal meaning of a persons words.

    again, i am an outsider, i may be missing some subtle context here. for example, i have no idea what those others flags mean or whose side they represented.

    What it means is that pretty much most of America is losing their fucking minds over something right now.
    Right now?

    Yep. Right this second. Having coffee with Crazy.

    Drake on
  • Ed321Ed321 Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    So I read the actual article and yeah, it's basically "Congress is King George" or something. It's called hyperbole. As far as I can tell it's not like he's advocating armed rebellion or something. Why this is worth getting excited over is beyond me.

    Ed321 on
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Yeah he's basically saying we should go back to the founders ideals. You know the rich old white land owners should be the only voting demographic, black people should be 3/5's of a person and women should be in the kitchen. Just as the founders intended!

    Preacher on
  • TheBlackWindTheBlackWind Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Jesus Christ, I already have to put up with rednecks flying the Confederate flag above the US flag. (while local officials complain about people flying the Mexican flag below the US flag) Now Chuck Norris promotes this? Fuck you Chuck.

    TheBlackWind on
  • Ed321Ed321 Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Preacher wrote: »
    Yeah he's basically saying we should go back to the founders ideals. You know the rich old white land owners should be the only voting demographic, black people should be 3/5's of a person and women should be in the kitchen. Just as the founders intended!

    Just because that's what you want him to be saying doesn't make it true.

    But I don't follow Chuck Norris' piercing insights so maybe he has a history of linking the two. There's nothing that indicates that message in the article though.

    edit: oh is one of those flags the confederate flag? His entire message makes no sense then.

    Ed321 on
  • GoodOmensGoodOmens Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Smurph wrote: »
    Right but the 50 stars flag was fine when Bush was in office. I would have figured the far-left's whole "Not My President" thing would have left a bad enough taste in conservative mouths to ensure they didn't try their own version of it when the other side had a guy in the white house, but I guess that's too much to ask.

    The extreme right wing has never had much of a collective memory, except for the years 1980-1988. And a deeply flawed and one-sided memory of colonial days.

    GoodOmens on
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  • JustinSane07JustinSane07 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2009
    Rent wrote: »
    Why is this a big deal?

    From the perspective of an outsider neither the op or the post makes any sense, can someone explain?

    Chuck Norris can divide by zero

    Chuck Norris once ate a black hole. He said it tasted like chicken

    Chuck Norris once counted to infinity...twice

    Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did
    These jokes and others like them became a meme back in 2008, all using Chuck Norris- former star of TV Western "Walker, Texas Ranger" and of atrociously bad Bruce Lee knockoff Kung Fu films

    They were ironic "compliments" to Norris' fighting ability, most notably his roundhouse kick, which is his signature move

    Norris parlayed his internet fame into a pseudo-revival of his career, which reached his zenith when he made a fuckawesome campaign ad with Mike Huckabee, which is fuckawesome

    Norris then showed his true colors when he tried, with a modicum of success, to recruit people to follow his somewhat insane far-right rantings

    Spurred on by Fox News (which he is a frequent guest commentator on such shows as "Fox and Friends" and the Huckabee show they have now), he's recently written a blog post about, instead of putting up the Stars and Stripes, putting up earlier flags (like the 13 original colonies one, which he talked about), the "Don't Tread On Me" flag used during the Revolutionary War, and the [strike]Stars and Ba-[/strike] uh er not that one because that would be racist and he would therefore be dogwhistling. He's also recommended that if you raise the actual American Flag (the one with the 50 stars on it), that you stain it with tea to show your support for the teabaggers, those racist douches who have been causing quite a stir lately via protesting everything our current president is doing and demanding the prez's real birth certificate

    In any case what he's doing, or advocating, is really fucking offensive because 1) none of those flags are the real American flag (earlier flags in our nation's history are not considered "real" flags because they don't reflect the current number of states in the nation, and 2) fucking with the American flag in any way (via burning, staining, or tearing the current one) is considered offensive, unless you're properly disposing of an unusuable (due to it being torn, stained, frayed, or burned, or it simply is not usuable due to normal wear and tear) one

    The irony is of course the far-right fucking hates it when some far left douche burns the flag in effigy over some bullshit

    Basically, lolrepublicans

    2008? What the fuck are you on, boy? Try like, 2005. I'm pretty sure I was still in college when the Chuck Norris Fact Generator came online.

    JustinSane07 on
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Ed321 wrote: »
    Preacher wrote: »
    Yeah he's basically saying we should go back to the founders ideals. You know the rich old white land owners should be the only voting demographic, black people should be 3/5's of a person and women should be in the kitchen. Just as the founders intended!

    Just because that's what you want him to be saying doesn't make it true.

    But I don't follow Chuck Norris' piercing insights so maybe he has a history of linking the two. There's nothing that indicates that message in the article though.

    edit: oh is one of those flags the confederate flag? His entire message makes no sense then.

    He's evoking the founders of this country all the original flags were carried by people who held those ideals. When conservatives spew that garbage that was exactly what the "founders" espoused. They didn't include the right of women to vote, black people were 3/5's of a person, and the only people they wanted able to vote were rich white landowners.

    Preacher on
  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem I've got waffles and I've got beerRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Ed321 wrote: »
    Preacher wrote: »
    Yeah he's basically saying we should go back to the founders ideals. You know the rich old white land owners should be the only voting demographic, black people should be 3/5's of a person and women should be in the kitchen. Just as the founders intended!

    Just because that's what you want him to be saying doesn't make it true.

    But I don't follow Chuck Norris' piercing insights so maybe he has a history of linking the two. There's nothing that indicates that message in the article though.

    edit: oh is one of those flags the confederate flag? His entire message makes no sense then.
    No, one of those flags isn't the confederate flag. Also, the 'stars and bars' isn't what everyone thinks of when they think of a Confederate flag.

    matt has a problem on
    m9KVEYF.jpg
  • Ed321Ed321 Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Preacher wrote: »
    Ed321 wrote: »
    Preacher wrote: »
    Yeah he's basically saying we should go back to the founders ideals. You know the rich old white land owners should be the only voting demographic, black people should be 3/5's of a person and women should be in the kitchen. Just as the founders intended!

    Just because that's what you want him to be saying doesn't make it true.

    But I don't follow Chuck Norris' piercing insights so maybe he has a history of linking the two. There's nothing that indicates that message in the article though.

    edit: oh is one of those flags the confederate flag? His entire message makes no sense then.

    He's evoking the founders of this country all the original flags were carried by people who held those ideals. When conservatives spew that garbage that was exactly what the "founders" espoused. They didn't include the right of women to vote, black people were 3/5's of a person, and the only people they wanted able to vote were rich white landowners.

    Uh, what. Either I'm reading you wrong or you're saying that any historical figure/ideal out of step with contemporary values can't be invoked. That would disqualify, like, pretty much every single contributor to American values who ever lived.

    edit:
    No, one of those flags isn't the confederate flag. Also, the 'stars and bars' isn't what everyone thinks of when they think of a Confederate flag.

    My mistake, was responding to TheBlackWind's post.

    Ed321 on
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Ed321 wrote: »

    Uh, what. Either I'm reading you wrong or you're saying that any historical figure/ideal out of step with contemporary values can't be invoked. That would disqualify, like, pretty much every single contributor to American values who ever lived.

    I'm saying what the "founders" norris is talking about put in the constitution limited the fuck out of anyone who wasn't white and male. Which is great for people like Chuck Norris and Glenn Beck, but sucks for anyone who fails the paper bag test.

    Preacher on
  • Ed321Ed321 Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Preacher wrote: »
    Ed321 wrote: »

    Uh, what. Either I'm reading you wrong or you're saying that any historical figure/ideal out of step with contemporary values can't be invoked. That would disqualify, like, pretty much every single contributor to American values who ever lived.

    I'm saying what the "founders" norris is talking about put in the constitution limited the fuck out of anyone who wasn't white and male. Which is great for people like Chuck Norris and Glenn Beck, but sucks for anyone who fails the paper bag test.

    So you're saying the founders can't/shouldn't be invoked, then?

    Ed321 on
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