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[BLANK WHITE CARDS 3] Not Dead Round 6: Summery's Turn

EvilBadmanEvilBadman DO NOT TRUST THIS MANRegistered User regular
edited November 2009 in Critical Failures
GAME ON (Post 45)
ATTENTION: Spectators may post in the thread, provided their posts are in italics, like this. Failure to comply, or inane chattering will result in your requested departure from the thread.


What the hell is One Thousand Blank Cards?

Think "Calvinball: MS Paint Edition."

Intriguing. Tell me more!

1000 Blank White Cards is a card game. Every player gets 5 cards. They go around one at a time, drawing one card, playing one card. Play continues until the deck runs out. Simple as falling off a log.

The catch is that generally you're writing the cards, because most of the cards in your hand are blank. You can do near whatever you like with a card - make up rules, destroy the rules, modify the rules, give people titles, make unreasonable demands, give points, anything you particularly like. An example from an old game on here:

00Primus_secretinvasion.jpg

Note several important elements: A title, an image, and what the card does. These are the three common elements of any card. Or things can get a bit more... abstract.

1003Mukai_Catgirl.JPG

Or possibly even surrealistic.

1003Mukai_MarsSunrise.JPG

or

030_Majik_God.JPG

You get an idea of the kind of shenanigans that can go down.

Wait... doesn't that card make sure nobody can win?

No rule against making a rule that nobody can win.

But... I... psyduck.gif

Right you are, my friend. Right you are.

But what's the POINT?

Play to win, my friends. Play to win.

Sort of. Only not really.

Quite often cards will give points, or coins, or glorbnaks. This is a fine thing, and a handy matchstick to determine "who has the most points". However, a true Thousand Card Master knows the point is to be funnier than the other fucksticks. If you make people laugh you have won. If you do not you can have infinity points and be a loser. Big-time loser. Epic loser.

Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me!

You will now.

I'm running this game. My powers are boundless and unconstrained by the mere cards of players. I reserve the right at any time to ruthlessly execute people for not playing a card within 24 hours if I am around, or if they are terminally stupid. I am a harsh dictator.

EvilBadman on
FyreWulff wrote: »
I should note that Badman is fucking awesome
XBL- Evil Badman MD; Steam- EvilBadman; Twitter - EvilBadman
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Posts

  • EvilBadmanEvilBadman DO NOT TRUST THIS MAN Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    ROUND 6

    PLAYERS
    1. Summery, the Encouraging Firefly [0 Points, 1 Tote Bag Filled with Makeup, OMG] Darkbad, Lover (Cards played on Lovers affect both) <
      YOUR TURN
    2. Samurai, Unicorn Princess [0 Points] Darkbad, Unicorn Powers (May change a card in thier hand into a blank)
    3. AJAlkaline, The Drunk, Fucker of Bitches [-999267 Points] Darkbad, Drunk (Players may award or deduct points based on Drunk's Antics)
    4. Nefffffffffff, Too Sweet [0 Points, 1 Tote Bag Filled with Makeup, OMG] Darkbad, Wolf Spirit Familiar (Cannot block until 10/14, attacks for 1d20), Lover (Cards played on Lovers affect both)
    5. Simonwolf [0 Points] LUCIFER, Lord of Hell (Can only be affected by cards in Hell)
    6. Hayasa, Peecy-Pee, the Morning Fairy, Best Friend Ever [0 Points] Darkbad, Charming British Millionaire (Ignores effects of cards that deny his British Birthright), May Play Two Cards A Turn
    7. Valkun, Robin Sparkles [0 Points] 11 Damage
    8. Tommy2Hands, the Prettiest Princess [0 Points] New
    GAME MASTER
    Spoiler:
    DEITIES
    Spoiler:
    Globals Affecting All Players
    • JEALOUSY: All players must target the Lovers during Round 6.
    • Disney Musical: Game is a Dineys Musical, players are Characters and may post in song.
    • ARMAGEDDON: If at the end of Round 6 new players outnumber old, the old players lose. OR If at the end of Round 6; the old players outnumber new, then new players die and old swap alignment to opposite plane.
    • emot-siren.gifGAME IS HILARIOUSemot-siren.gif
    • EGOswitch is set to OFF.
    • Everyone except Hylian has a Double Whopper with cheese (minus tomatoes), medium french fries and a soft drink of their choice. Valkun has two. Unless he ate one, or both.
    Globals Affecting Darkbad Players:
    • Dayman: 50 HP; Can damage cards with 2d10 chops; if a player damages another player Victim gets 50 points.

    WITNESS THESE, LAWS OF INFALLIBILITY:
    I. Laws May Not Be Altered By Players.
    II. My Word Is Law.
    III. You MUST Play A Card Within 24 Hours Of The Start Of Your Turn, Or Your Turn Is Forfeit.
    IV. Forfeit Two Turns, You Will Be Replaced.
    V. Any Card Requiring A Player To Do Something Will Have A Deadline Of That Player's Next Turn And Not Sooner.
    VI. Every card does exactly what is says on the card. You may not errata a card in your posts. If there is a dispute, refer to Law I.
    VII. Spectators are welcome as long as they post in italics.

    Law 5 has been created to prevent the game from sputtering when we had to wait for everyone to decide whether or not they were traveling widdershins before the game could continue. You may complete any tasks prior to your turn coming round with no penalty.

    As an additional side note, I will be intervening in the game with special cards when I please if I feel the game needs a gentle nudge.

    Blank White Cards in Your Hand Look Like This:
    000Badman_BlankCard.jpg
    USE THIS CARD AS A TEMPLATE (ERASE THE TEXT). ALL NEWLY MADE CARDS MUST BE 300x400!

    FyreWulff wrote: »
    I should note that Badman is fucking awesome
    XBL- Evil Badman MD; Steam- EvilBadman; Twitter - EvilBadman
  • scrivenerjonesscrivenerjones Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    yes

    it is as it was told in the prophecy

  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I'm not going to sign up because you always burn out on these so damn fast.

    Gamertag: PrimusD | Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
  • EvilBadmanEvilBadman DO NOT TRUST THIS MAN Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I didn't run the last one, also players tend to not fucking post cards.

    FyreWulff wrote: »
    I should note that Badman is fucking awesome
    XBL- Evil Badman MD; Steam- EvilBadman; Twitter - EvilBadman
  • samurai6966samurai6966 Registered User
    edited September 2009
    If you don't have enough people, count me in once I make some cards this afternoon! Evil Samurai deck anyone!?!?!?!?!

    Echo wrote: »
    Yeah, some times I just want to get my farm in shape without being bothered by green explosive dildos.
  • HayasaHayasa Registered User
    edited September 2009
    My cards are in a PM like a...thing that is in a PM.

  • samurai6966samurai6966 Registered User
    edited September 2009
    Cards PM'd and ready to start chaos!

    Echo wrote: »
    Yeah, some times I just want to get my farm in shape without being bothered by green explosive dildos.
  • EvilBadmanEvilBadman DO NOT TRUST THIS MAN Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Still needin' people.

    FyreWulff wrote: »
    I should note that Badman is fucking awesome
    XBL- Evil Badman MD; Steam- EvilBadman; Twitter - EvilBadman
  • RingoRingo Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I just want to watch

    is that so wrong?

    ceres wrote: »
    I'm just going to go ahead and lock this thread before I feel any worse about humanity.
    AUGMENTOS - Edcrab's Exigency RPG
  • samurai6966samurai6966 Registered User
    edited September 2009
    Who is playing so far?

    Echo wrote: »
    Yeah, some times I just want to get my farm in shape without being bothered by green explosive dildos.
  • EdcrabEdcrab Registered User
    edited September 2009
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    I'm not going to sign up because you always burn out on these so damn fast.

    Well partially it's because people bitch and moan and then refuse to post cards and in that situation there's not much the host can do

    Also the last game produced the worst fanfic in the history of fanfic and I should be ashamed for making Lynx post that

    I... am kinda tempted to sign up again

    cBY55.gifbmJsl.png
  • RingoRingo Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Shame maybe does not go far enough

    ceres wrote: »
    I'm just going to go ahead and lock this thread before I feel any worse about humanity.
    AUGMENTOS - Edcrab's Exigency RPG
  • AJAlkaline40AJAlkaline40 __BANNED USERS
    edited October 2009
    I am definitely signing up for this. Give me a little bit to get my cards did.

    idiot.jpg
  • nefffffffffffnefffffffffff Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    what do I do!? I want in on this but I'm going to dinner in like 10 minutes! fuck!

    camo_sig2.png
  • ValkunValkun Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    To be fair, we didn't have a problem with playing our turns when HylianBunny ran it. I think we just broke him. That means we won, right? <img class=" title=":lol:" class="bbcode_smiley" />

  • Dac VinDac Vin Reimu Hakurei sat in her shrine because she was on the internet. Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Valkun wrote: »
    To be fair, we didn't have a problem with playing our turns when HylianBunny ran it. I think we just broke him. That means we won, right? <img class=" title=":lol:" class="bbcode_smiley" />

    We didn't have problems with turns because one of the first cards played removed that notion in favor of a free for all.

    Also I must agree, the goal of blank cards is less to be the best or the funniest or have the most points at the end, but for players to break everybody else. Including the host.

    camo_sig.png
  • HylianbunnyHylianbunny Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    I want to submit cards, but I'm blanking (ha, ha!) on ideas.

    Hurm.

  • AJAlkaline40AJAlkaline40 __BANNED USERS
    edited October 2009
    Alright, I sent my cards.

    Let's start playing already!

    EDIT:
    Also, if anyone is short a few cards, I have a few ideas I can give you.

    idiot.jpg
  • HylianbunnyHylianbunny Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Sending cards.

  • samurai6966samurai6966 Registered User
    edited October 2009
    Yes... Come my children. Come join the chaos samurai for a little game. Its only your life on the line. Such a small wager, if I say so myself.

    Echo wrote: »
    Yeah, some times I just want to get my farm in shape without being bothered by green explosive dildos.
  • DarianDarian Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Fixes some popcorn and prepares to enjoy the show.

  • ueanuean Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    *POPCORN*

    This is gonna be rad.

    Like, radical, dude.

    Guys? Hay guys?
    steam_sig.png
  • HayasaHayasa Registered User
    edited October 2009
  • Silas BrownSilas Brown Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Oh dang, this looks awesome. If it isn't too late, I'll make up some cards when I get home this evening.

    For the image-manipulation impaired, what's the best free tool for a Windows XP user?

    CmgpQ.jpg
  • DarianDarian Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
  • Dac VinDac Vin Reimu Hakurei sat in her shrine because she was on the internet. Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
  • nefffffffffffnefffffffffff Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    yeah I'm hoping this is still open at 11-ish when I get home from work tonight. I wanted to sign up last night but I had to go to dinner, then I had to get up at 7 thismorning and have class and work all day. posting this from the library and can't access my image editor. oh my god I want in sooo bad. If I cant make it, pm me because I have some card ideas.

    camo_sig2.png
  • EvilBadmanEvilBadman DO NOT TRUST THIS MAN Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Still needing players, citizens!

    FyreWulff wrote: »
    I should note that Badman is fucking awesome
    XBL- Evil Badman MD; Steam- EvilBadman; Twitter - EvilBadman
  • nefffffffffffnefffffffffff Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
  • Fatal3RR0RFatal3RR0R Registered User
    edited October 2009
    Hmmm this looks pretty awesome.

    I might join in.

    peachip4sig.png
  • summerycleptsummeryclept Registered User
    edited October 2009
    I want a blue dot on this thread.

    also I pm'd

  • nefffffffffffnefffffffffff Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    That's 5, right? or is that 6? can we start yet?

    camo_sig2.png
  • RingoRingo Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Nope never start

    Foreplay forever

    ceres wrote: »
    I'm just going to go ahead and lock this thread before I feel any worse about humanity.
    AUGMENTOS - Edcrab's Exigency RPG
  • samurai6966samurai6966 Registered User
    edited October 2009
    Ringo wrote: »
    Nope never start

    Foreplay forever

    :winky:

    Echo wrote: »
    Yeah, some times I just want to get my farm in shape without being bothered by green explosive dildos.
  • nefffffffffffnefffffffffff Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    the suspense is killing me.

    camo_sig2.png
  • samurai6966samurai6966 Registered User
    edited October 2009
    Do we have enough now? I want to use my zombie chicken card on ya'll.

    Echo wrote: »
    Yeah, some times I just want to get my farm in shape without being bothered by green explosive dildos.
  • EvilBadmanEvilBadman DO NOT TRUST THIS MAN Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Checking, Assembling Deck. Game to start within the day, even if we're short a person or two.

    FyreWulff wrote: »
    I should note that Badman is fucking awesome
    XBL- Evil Badman MD; Steam- EvilBadman; Twitter - EvilBadman
  • simonwolfsimonwolf DEHUMANIZE YOURSELF AND FACE TO BLOODSHEDRegistered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Ah man, can I still send cards and join?

    I'll be super quick, I promise!

    EDIT: otherwise just count this as a +blue dot

    14LXWPx.jpg?1
  • RingoRingo Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Your mom's a blue dot

    ceres wrote: »
    I'm just going to go ahead and lock this thread before I feel any worse about humanity.
    AUGMENTOS - Edcrab's Exigency RPG
  • nefffffffffffnefffffffffff Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    1kbwc assembllllllllllllllle!

    camo_sig2.png
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