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Pathetic Geek Stories - The Regeekening

RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazedby the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
edited October 2009 in Chatlog
Admit it - you've made some serious boners in your life.

Huge boners.

Unforgettable boners.

Boners you'll never, ever live down.

Its okay - we've all made big boners, at some point.

So don't sit there, stewing in your regrets. Share them. Get that boner off your chest.

Rankenphile on
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Posts

  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    edited September 2009
  • JC of DIJC of DI I think we're fucked up. I know I am.Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    My boners were covered discreetly by the books of whatever class I happened to be leaving.

    CRicciSig.jpg
    360/PS3 - JCofDI | Steam
  • Brodo FagginsBrodo Faggins Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Today I was camera op for a horror film I got signed on to, and me and the naked, bloody chick with the prosthetic neck wound got into a heated argument about Mac vs Windows, unaware that the entire crew was watching, laughing silently.

    9PZnq.png
  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    edited September 2009
    boners are pretty inconvenient

    until you're boning

  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I make boners every time I pass someone on the street.

  • nateknatek Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Today I was camera op for a horror film I got signed on to, and me and the naked, bloody chick with the prosthetic neck wound got into a heated argument about Mac vs Windows, unaware that the entire crew was watching, laughing silently.

    boners in hands

    5zqiq8.jpg
    Steam PSN: natek7
  • RedeemerRedeemer Registered User
    edited September 2009
    Boners feel incredibly weird on my chest. I get ticklish

    25jyxzr.jpg
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter Nattravnen Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I have never made a truly earth shattering, catastrophic boners

    most of my boners are pretty average, I think

    they only seem big to me because of my self esteem issues

    RCmKIvs.gif
    indie_winter on PS4
  • MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I was the girl's initiation thing in highschool.

    They'd grab my bum and giggle.

    I felt so used.

  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    this one time

    I spent thousands of dollars to fly thousands of miles to go to a nerd convertion and hang out with a bunch of stinky nerds

    then I did it again 12 months later

    boy was my face red

  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    getting shot down by a girl who sat down on my boner and rubbed on aforementioned boner. this girl was the girl who also shut me down in the unmentionable dj qualls incident

    she later conceived a white and black child at an orgy some months later, so therefore i win.

    TAKE THAT, GOD/DJ QUALLS

  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I was born.

    I guess that's something horrible that I'll never live down.

  • 2 Marcus 2 Ravens2 Marcus 2 Ravens Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I found out how much of a terrible fucking nerd I was when I moved. The overwhelming majority of the boxes I brought were just video games and comic books.

    The worst part is? I was, and still am, so proud of myself.

  • JimothyJimothy Not in front of the fox he's with the owlRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I have the most intense boners every morning when I wake up. Also, every morning I find that I need to pee badly.

    These facts do not get along well.

    Owlsig.jpg
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter Nattravnen Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    #pipe wrote: »
    boy was my face red

    you sure that wasn't the Pox?

    RCmKIvs.gif
    indie_winter on PS4
  • KnobKnob TURN THE BEAT BACK InternetModerator mod
    edited September 2009
    i have passed up on guaranteed naked lady action to play shadowrun or paint minis

  • Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2009
    one time i got a huge boner while at speed swimming practice

    worst fucking time

  • Indie WinterIndie Winter Nattravnen Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Knob wrote: »
    i have passed up on guaranteed naked lady action to play shadowrun or paint minis

    well knob

    you are pretty terrible

    RCmKIvs.gif
    indie_winter on PS4
  • Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    something hilarious happened fairly recently, I remember

    the kinda thing where I do or say something really embarassing and then had to run away with my friends whereupon we promptly cracked the hell up

    I do not, however, recall the specific context of this event

    glad I could contribute

    www.twitter.com/amazingwarlock
  • MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I used to be shy or something.

  • mnollmnoll Registered User
    edited September 2009
    one time i got a huge boner while at speed swimming practice

    worst fucking time
    Pool boners are the worst!

    I have on occasion been trapped in a pool, waiting for a boner to pass

  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I mostly just cause others to fail. All my dumb things I've done where more or less on purpose.

  • MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    "The one that got away" married some asian dude with a small penis.

  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Knob wrote: »
    i have passed up on guaranteed naked lady action to play shadowrun or paint minis

    Did she insult you because of your decision?

    If so, did you deck 'er?

  • KoshianKoshian __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2009
    one time i got a huge boner while at speed swimming practice

    worst fucking time

    all the lithe, near nude teenage boys will do that to you

  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited September 2009
    Knob wrote: »
    i have passed up on guaranteed naked lady action to play shadowrun or paint minis

    man welcome to my life

    one time I was playing around with this dorky strap on dildo thing that my friend had laying around

    it was clearly a novelty item, not a use-it-a-lot item

    it had giant huge fat person rubber underpants attached to it, and was designed like a squirt gun, in that you could fill it with water (or other fluids, I suppose) and squeeze the balls to shoot the water out

    well I turned around real quick with it in my hands

    and it shot water out

    all over my girlfriend

    I have no idea whatsoever how long the water had been in there or where it had come from

    but ohhhh man grossssss

  • 2 Marcus 2 Ravens2 Marcus 2 Ravens Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Knob wrote: »
    i have passed up on guaranteed naked lady action to play shadowrun or paint minis

    I was speed running Mario when my girlfriend at the time tried to get my attention by going down on me. I was doing really well so I couldn't just stop..

    So I didn't.

  • Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2009
    mnoll wrote: »
    one time i got a huge boner while at speed swimming practice

    worst fucking time
    Pool boners are the worst!

    I have on occasion been trapped in a pool, waiting for a boner to pass

    i was just swimming laps, boner all pointing straight downward

    praying that the girl in the other lane wouldn't look over

  • KnobKnob TURN THE BEAT BACK InternetModerator mod
    edited September 2009
    Knob wrote: »
    i have passed up on guaranteed naked lady action to play shadowrun or paint minis

    I was speed running Mario when my girlfriend at the time tried to get my attention by going down on me. I was doing really well so I couldn't just stop..

    So I didn't.

    jesus, you're a faggot

  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    so there I was

    having to decide between a blowjob and a bitchin hellboy cutout

  • JC of DIJC of DI I think we're fucked up. I know I am.Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    I started to get a pool boner when taking swimming lessons once, just as the instructor wanted me to try floating on my back.

    "It'll pass." I thought to myself as I began floating on my back.

    It did not in fact, pass. It rose to greet the cool air.

    CRicciSig.jpg
    360/PS3 - JCofDI | Steam
  • TrillianTrillian Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Meiz wrote: »
    "The one that got away" married some asian dude with a small penis.

    and you know this from personal experience?


    They cast a shadow like a sundial in the morning light. It was half past 10.
  • TossrockTossrock too weird to live too rare to dieRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    one time I worked at a large internet company, that's pretty geeky

    actually it was more than one time

    another time, I worked for EA

  • Indie WinterIndie Winter Nattravnen Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    #pipe wrote: »
    so there I was

    having to decide between a blowjob and a bitchin hellboy cutout

    I seriously cannot believe you chose what you did

    RCmKIvs.gif
    indie_winter on PS4
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited September 2009
    man, now that you bring it up, I seriously can't even begin to count the number of times I've passed up getting laid so I could keep playing a game or painting a model or something

    there is a 13 year old me inside me that must be so fucking pissed

  • TossrockTossrock too weird to live too rare to dieRegistered User regular
    edited September 2009
    #pipe wrote: »
    so there I was

    having to decide between a blowjob and a bitchin hellboy cutout

    I seriously cannot believe you chose what you did

    that was Tube, not him

  • Indie WinterIndie Winter Nattravnen Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Tossrock wrote: »
    #pipe wrote: »
    so there I was

    having to decide between a blowjob and a bitchin hellboy cutout

    I seriously cannot believe you chose what you did

    that was Tube, not him

    seriously?

    man it has been a while

    my forum memories are slowly slipping away

    time to brush up on the archives

    wait does this constitute as a boner?

    RCmKIvs.gif
    indie_winter on PS4
  • MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Trillian wrote: »
    Meiz wrote: »
    "The one that got away" married some asian dude with a small penis.

    and you know this from personal experience?

    What the hell is this supposed to mean?

  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Knob wrote: »
    i have passed up on guaranteed naked lady action to play shadowrun or paint minis

    Did she insult you because of your decision?

    If so, did you deck 'er?

    How did your Johnson feel about it?

  • 2 Marcus 2 Ravens2 Marcus 2 Ravens Registered User regular
    edited September 2009
    Knob wrote: »
    Knob wrote: »
    i have passed up on guaranteed naked lady action to play shadowrun or paint minis

    I was speed running Mario when my girlfriend at the time tried to get my attention by going down on me. I was doing really well so I couldn't just stop..

    So I didn't.

    jesus, you're a faggot

    In my defense, she was pretty damn awful at it.

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