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Debate and Discourse: AWESOME POST in "The Worst Presents You've Ever Recieved/Given", by

OptimusZedOptimusZed Registered User regular
edited November 2009 in [2008-2012] Awesome Posts?
OptimusZed has reported a post.

Reason:
Because the mental image of this kid finding out makes me laugh so hard I can barely read the story through the tears.

I'm a horrible person.
Post: The Worst Presents You've Ever Recieved/Given
Forum: Debate and Discourse
Assigned Moderators: Elki, ElJeffe, Irond Will

Posted by: illirica
Original Content:
Okay, mostly I lurk around here, but my husband tells me I have to post this story.

It was Christmas. My little brother was about seven years old. He's in Boy Scouts, and both he and I are on a "save the environment" kick. My grandmother decided that, for Christmas, she would give him a wolf.

There was a program, in which you could sponsor a wolf - raised / partially raised in captivity, released into the wild, etc. So, she sponsored a wolf in his name. The company would send him pictures of "his" wolf, and updates on where it had traveled from the tracking collar, and so on. Potentially, this was a neat idea, but...

Two months later, his wolf was shot and killed by poachers.

The company sent him a letter, telling him this, in great detail. He was devastated. He had opened his envelope from the wolf company expecting a happy update and some pictures, and instead there was a long and horrible story about how his Christmas present was now dead, and how the coat had been cut from its body to be used in illegal fur products, and how x% of wolves met this horrible fate.

Oh, and would he like to sponsor another wolf?

D:

OptimusZed on
We're reading Rifts. You should too. You know you want to. On Hiatus!

Any gamers in the Danville, PA area? PM me if you're interested in some tabletop gaming.

Posts

  • HachfaceHachface Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    You are terrible, Zed.

    one star.

  • OptimusZedOptimusZed Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Hachface wrote: »
    You are terrible, Zed.

    one star.
    If it helps, I really only hate children.

    We're reading Rifts. You should too. You know you want to. On Hiatus!

    Any gamers in the Danville, PA area? PM me if you're interested in some tabletop gaming.
  • AntimatterAntimatter if you want to talk to me look elsewhere.Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    thanks for sharing this sad story, jackass

  • DarmakDarmak Godking of the Snerkywizards Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    ahahahahaha, oh god

    PIZTDhW.jpg
  • RingoRingo Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I wonder if Christian Children's Fund sends out similar letters when the child you're sponsoring joins the latest local revolution.

    You 'n me Zed. Against the world. Against the children.

    ceres wrote: »
    I'm just going to go ahead and lock this thread before I feel any worse about humanity.
    AUGMENTOS - Edcrab's Exigency RPG
  • Donkey KongDonkey Kong Don't treat me like potato. Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    From the grandmother who inexplicably gives her straight grandson a book on finding a husband to sitting alone in a cold apartment, penniless and forgotten by your family and friends, that entire thread is hilarious and heart wrenching in turn. Occasionally it's both at once, like here.

    china_sig.jpg
  • MarthMarth Spaceman Crocodile Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    To serve wolf?

    OH MY GOD

    Steam Xbox Live LoL: SadSchaub

    Av credit
  • OptimusZedOptimusZed Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Ringo wrote: »
    I wonder if Christian Children's Fund sends out similar letters when the child you're sponsoring joins the latest local revolution.

    You 'n me Zed. Against the world. Against the children.
    "We are dismayed to report that Onalanakanachaka has been spending your generous gifts on ammunition and heroin."
    From the grandmother who inexplicably gives her straight grandson a book on finding a husband to sitting alone in a cold apartment, penniless and forgotten by your family and friends, that entire thread is hilarious and heart wrenching in turn. Occasionally it's both at once, like here.
    It truly is a excellent thread.

    We're reading Rifts. You should too. You know you want to. On Hiatus!

    Any gamers in the Danville, PA area? PM me if you're interested in some tabletop gaming.
  • freelancerbobfreelancerbob UKRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Call me cynical, but I bet the "sponsor the x" companies do this sort of thing all the time. You sponsored x? Too bad some evil men shot it, give us more money?

    What is this thing that is happening here.
  • LeitnerLeitner Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Call me cynical, but I bet the "sponsor the x" companies do this sort of thing all the time. You sponsored x? Too bad some evil men shot it, give us more money?

    It's not a one off payement, it's multiple so it would be like someone getting you to cancel a subscription so you pick up another one. Kinda pointless, and risks you not starting another one. Unless they're bored and looking to screw around with kids or something.

  • RingoRingo Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    And we all know where that leads

    sp1.jpg

    ceres wrote: »
    I'm just going to go ahead and lock this thread before I feel any worse about humanity.
    AUGMENTOS - Edcrab's Exigency RPG
  • DubhDubh BEST FRIENDS WITH FIRE Hudda!Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    ahahahahaha


  • A duck!A duck! Super Moderator, Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited November 2009
    This is the best way to cancel a subscription ever.

    Favorite quotes
    Spoiler:
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