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As Resolved as it's going to get: So my mother in law is evil.
Posts
So once before she took sides with an abusive husband, I see a pattern here.
Something made her change sides back then, but that might be because other people got involved, maybe she was shamed into acting in her children's favor.
From what you mentioned that case made court and he was convicted, did her initial refusal to believe her children get mentioned in the trial?
I'd say collect as much dirt on her as she is willing to fling your way, save those nasty emails when you get them.
If there are legal repercussions in the future that might help.
Other than that, I think it's best for you, your wife and the sisters to keep away from this family for now.
I think the behaviour the aunt is demonstrating right now is very inappropriate and petty, seems like her stance for now is either that she just wants to keep out of this and pretend everything is fine and dandy or that she really took sides with her sister and her husband.
This seems like the root for the best overall solution, actually. Make a family of you, your wife, and her free sisters, and make what you can of that. Let the currently underage children know, if you can, that you're there for them. Do any court testifying that you need to. Other than that, act as though Alice and the rest of the crazies don't exist. If anything, they'll be wasting all their energy being angry and suspicious, while you'll be doing better each day. Just don't play into their 'cut off' games, don't respond outside of testifying at court. Part of why Alice is doing these things is to hurt your wife and her sisters; she probably gets a kick out of it, thinking it's some kind of control. Take away that control, and she has nothing left.
My thoughts are:
Don't brake the law in any way, this would give Alice such a strong manipulative hold over the entire situation, the good guys have to stay good.
I'm thinking if you really want to crack this thing open maybe its a good idea to hire a Private Investigator, what you need is real hard evidence of this abuse. You may already have some, you said Alice emailed you, bring these abusive emails to the attention of child services, voice mail messages? Any thing you can provide to back up your claims.
I know at times here in Australia the TV show Current Afair runs story's about abuse like this when the courts fail and people have no where to turn. I know this means people are going to get hurt, but at the moment people are being hurt in the dark. A TV crew in Alices face might make her or Brendon blow up, cause this facade of "All this Abuse talk is lies" to come crumbling down.
Maybe smuggle in phones to the children, tell them to call 911 (We are in America right?). I know it sounds sick but if the Law is going to do any thing forceful and expediently they have to see it happen. Photos of bruises and other injury's.
Bring Confidence and Self Esteem to the kids and bring pressure down on Alice and Brenden.
This might be bad advise, but I feel compassion for your situation and am pushing as much positive energy thought my internet connection towards you as I can.
The problem with these questions here is that you say you want to do something but you aren't telling us what result do you want. I mean you haven't told us you want a recipe for a pie, or advice on the children living with you mother in law.
If you want to rant for a bit that's fine (and understandable), but at the moment we aren't sure what you would like your solution to be.
I mean you and your wife could walk away, but that would not be very conductive to her siblings, or she could fight for custody of her sisters, or try and get Brandon charged again. There are a bunch of ways that this could end, but you haven't made it clear what you want in your posts.
Satans..... hints..... I'm a mo bro!
Because I agree, if there's real abuse in that house, they should not be allowed to stay.
Okay, clarifications:
1) The siblings for those that are confused.
My wife (23)
Francine (22)
Harriot (21)
Living at home still:
Dennis (19 or 20)
Jasmine (16 or 17)
Elaine (14 or 15)
Irene (9 or 10)
2) While getting the children taken away is tempting I don't think, with the access we have, we could get the evidence. I believe the current court case is the first step towards helping them though as it forces irregular visits by a CAS agent to the house and forces Brandon to get psychological help. The fact he is resisting this doesn't help his side either. We also do not have the resources to take care of all four kids, we'd love to but it's not in the cards right now.
3) Jasmine's boyfriend apparently lives at their home too, I don't know what this means but with both him (being an outsider) and Dennis there (Dennis is a big guy now) I think the younger kids are temporarily safe.
4) We keep all the incriminating ammo Alice sends our way and have given it to lawyers in previous cases before. I've not attended these cases so I'm not sure what impact they had if any.
5) I'm not sure the result I want, I'd like some way to bring Alice and Brandon to justice or kill their influence upon the children and the family but I don't think that'll happen. I admit I've adjusted quite a bit since I posted the OP so I'm more or less happy with where we are now.
6) I'd like to note we never ever make an attempt to contact Alice or even give her the satisfaction of replying to the shit she pulls. She still makes regular attempts to pull this shit though, either someone in the family is informing her or she's just driven to try as much as hellishly possible.
Invite your grandparents to christmas then.
Have your christmas think the opposite of your Aunt's (so if they do dinner have a lunch, if they do lunch, do dinner) this way you can keep in contact with them and not seriously piss off your Aunt that you are "stealing" people away.
Satans..... hints..... I'm a mo bro!
On that note we can't use them to communicate with the children, they don't want to risk being cut off themselves and they're quite old. They just want to be able to see all their children/grand children until they die.
How do I update the title? I think this is as resolved as it's going to get.
Go to your first post, click Edit and then on the next page click the button Go Advanced.