Vanilla Forums has been nominated for a second time in the CMS Critic "Critic's Choice" awards, and we need your vote! Read more here, and then do the thing (please).
Our new Indie Games subforum is now open for business in G&T. Go and check it out, you might land a code for a free game. If you're developing an indie game and want to post about it, follow these directions. If you don't, he'll break your legs! Hahaha! Seriously though.
Our rules have been updated and given their own forum. Go and look at them! They are nice, and there may be new ones that you didn't know about! Hooray for rules! Hooray for The System! Hooray for Conforming!

Uh Oh! Another Girl Help Thread

WaffenWaffen Ours is the FuryRegistered User regular
edited December 2009 in Help / Advice Forum
Earlier this year I had ended my relationship with my ex. We were dating for about six months when I decided to break up with her. At the time it wasn't simply working out for me. After taking a break for a month I officially ended it that March. From that point on I was single again and ready to meet others.

Prior to that relationship I had just returned from Active Duty with the military. That first semester at college went easy for finding girls that were interested in me. I felt as if they were chasing after me and the most I had to do was be myself.

Now that I was single things went off the same as my first semester. A few girls started talking to me, we'd hang out a few times, etc. However, something in my head at the time clicked and I kept making my standard impossible for the few girls that did enter my life. Either I felt people others would think that they weren't attractive enough and would make fun of me or I nit picked something that they had done in the past. Eventually, I did meet that girl who did make my standard. We did make some progress, but ultimately going back home for school and distance killed any chance of us two hooking up at the time. We ended up agreeing to keep in touch and later hook up in the fall.

During the summer on a drunken dare I did end up asking a girl out that lived in my area. Only this time I was turned off when she accidentally let it slip that she was only infatuated with my physical appearance and wanted sex. I knew this wouldn't work out for me so I ended it with the chick.

As the summer went on and I kept in touch with college girl. Unfortunately, my mandatory training got delayed to August. I was forced to miss a semester of school. A week before leaving I did meet another girl. We talked for awhile before I had to cut out.

Once I arrived to do my training I kept in touch with College Girl. However, as time went on I felt as if we were fading apart. Eventually we stopped talking all together. Ironically after this happened the girl in the above paragraph some how managed to get my number and we ended up talking a lot. Near the last two weeks of training a friend texted me telling me that the chick I was talking to wasn't 18 like she claimed she was and was 16 (!!!!!!). At this point I just ignored her all together. She up to today still texts me trying to get my attention. (Psycho bitch, get the hint)

Upon returning from training in October miss college started messaging me again. She wanted to tell me that she had "rediscovered religion" while I was gone. We started talking again for awhile. However, everything just went south as time went on. I felt as if our conversations were dull and uninteresting. Overall, I felt as if she wasn't interested anymore. Eventually a "Your mom" joke destroyed what we had built.

A month later a high school girl I liked came back into my life. We went out twice. Each time I felt as if I did most of the talking (She always asked about my army stories). She seemed to listen to them and enjoy them. However, when I'd ask her a question or anything it was just a one sentence response

"College is good"
"Taking X, Y Z"
"Doing okay"

Overall, I felt wrong. She still wanted to hang out with me when she got back from school. I tried talking to her while she was at school. We did have a few fun conversations. But as time goes on I'm not really interesting.

Even when I hanged out with friends in the past month at parties I feel as if I have a force field around me that repels girls. Everyone is interested in everyone but me. I'm not sure exactly whats going wrong.

Anyone care to help me out here and try to help me pinpoint what I'm doing wrong?

Waffen on

Posts

  • KazakaKazaka Registered User
    edited December 2009
    Waffen wrote: »
    Either I felt people others would think that they weren't attractive enough and would make fun of me or I nit picked something that they had done in the past.
    Anyone care to help me out here and try to help me pinpoint what I'm doing wrong?

    Maybe this has something to do with it? (I'm not being sarcastic or anything, I'm legitimately unsure. It might be a jumping-off point for further examination though.)

    ... They ate, slept and worked. Some of them found uninteresting partners at work who they married and came home to. Sometimes they would half-heartededly thrust into each other and children were made. They lived a middle class existence until their deaths to heart disease and cancer.
  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited December 2009
    It's more than a little possible you're looking into things that aren't there. You're remembering before when the ladies wouldn't leave you alone, and comparing it to now when you feel like you couldn't get a woman if you wore a sandwich board that said 'free cunnilingus and diamonds' so you conclude you must be doing something different. You probably aren't.

    bar-cc-1.jpg
  • Rubix42Rubix42 Registered User
    edited December 2009
    Kazaka wrote: »
    Waffen wrote: »
    Anyone care to help me out here and try to help me pinpoint what I'm doing wrong?

    Maybe this has something to do with it? (I'm not being sarcastic or anything, I'm legitimately unsure. It might be a jumping-off point for further examination though.)

    Removed the first bit because the last line is where you are going wrong. There is no right or wrong way to meet ladies. There is a confident approach and everything else. The confident approach is knowing, not thinking, not telling yourself, but knowing that you are one fine piece of man that anyone would be absolutely crazy for not being into. That knowledge is like 90% of meeting ladies. By having that knowledge, your body language changes, the way you talk changes and it is all in ways that are very difficult to control if you try to do it.

    So go back to your post, read the first bit again, and recapture the way you felt the first semester at school, and everything else will fall in place.

    signature goes here
Sign In or Register to comment.