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He's out, [chat] before wicket!

BogartBogart MR. Lady AnimeRegistered User regular
edited January 2010 in Debate and/or Discourse
This man and Paul Collingwood were absolute heroes today. Usually an utter plum, but today Ian R Bell bestrode the pitch like a colossus. Batting for around 4/5 hours and grinding away in the teeth of desperate Saffers aggression, Bell stood firm. Until he got out and made the last three overs terrifyingly tense.

Ian-Bell-maintains-Englan-002.jpg

A short list of helpful cricket terms for the uninitiated.

Googly - The legspinner's variation that turns into the right-hander and away from the left-hander

Grubber - A ball that hardly bounces - see also shooter

Leg-bye - When the ball deflects off the pad and the batsmen run. A shot must be offered to the ball. Leg-byes do not count against the bowler

Long hop - a ball which pitches short, sits up and 'begs' to be hit

Trundler - Slow, laborious type of bowler who thinks he's quick, once was quick, or is simply old, fat and unfit and needs to be put out to pasture. See military medium

Wrong 'un - Australian term for a googly - a legspinner's delivery that turns in the opposite direction, ie from off to leg

Yorker - A full-pitched delivery that is aimed at the batsman's toes and/or the base of the stumps. If the ball is swinging, these can be the most lethal delivery in the game, as perfected by Waqar Younis in his pomp

Zooter - A spin bowling variation, first devised by Shane Warne. This is a delivery that snakes out of the hand with little or no spin imparted, and so deceives through its very ordinariness. Some question whether the delivery has ever existed, for it could be another of Warne's mindgames to keep his opponents on their toes

That last bit is bolded to give an example of how awesome Aussie fat bloke Shane Warne is.

And read all about England's incredible last day in the test today against South Africa right here.

Bogart on
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Posts

  • The Crowing OneThe Crowing One Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
  • BobCescaBobCesca Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Bogart, I love you.

  • thisisntwallythisisntwally Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    you would think that those terms might clarify as opposed to obfuscate.

    YOU WOULD THINK!

    #someshit
  • TL DRTL DR Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Aww, I made a .jpg for a UK [chat], hoping to snipe Bogart's.

    Next time.

    eokNV.jpg
  • electricitylikesmeelectricitylikesme Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Man. Season 2, Episode 4 of Dollhouse is probably easily my favorite episode of the entire series. Of course I forecast awesome in the future of this show before the end so that may be challenged, but as a standalone episode I predict it'll be uncontested.

  • THEPAIN73THEPAIN73 Santabreaker PresentslayerRegistered User regular
    edited January 2010
    So it's like baseball then?

    Facebook | Amazon | Twitter | Youtube | PSN: ThePain73 | Steam: ThePain73
    3DS FC: 5343-7720-0490
  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    I always thought "wrong'un" was a euphamism for driving the train into Colchester instead of Victoria station.

    That's Little Britain for you.

  • Dunadan019Dunadan019 Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    england is too odd to actually exist. it must be a conspiracy inhabited by lizards in an alternate dimension.

  • BogartBogart MR. Lady Anime Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    I have long felt that the flaw in the essential makeup of the USA that prevents it from becoming the greatest nation on Earth is that it doesn't play cricket. It was an essential component of our colonial empire. Teach the locals cricket, and while they're getting the hang of it (no more than two decades of intense study will familiarise a novice with the greatest game) steal all their stuff and replace the govenment. It worked a treat.

    Iraq would have been a cakewalk if only you had thought to drop neatly parcelled bundles of cricket bats, wickets, balls and the 8788 page book of cricket rules all over Baghdad two weeks before the invasion began.
    BobCesca wrote: »
    Bogart, I love you.

    <3

  • BobCescaBobCesca Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Bogart wrote: »
    I have long felt that the flaw in the essential makeup of the USA that prevents it from becoming the greatest nation on Earth is that it doesn't play cricket. It was an essential component of our colonial empire. Teach the locals cricket, and while they're getting the hang of it (no more than two decades of intense study will familiarise a novice with the greatest game) steal all their stuff and replace the govenment. It worked a treat.

    Iraq would have been a cakewalk if only you had thought to drop neatly parcelled bundles of cricket bats, wickets, balls and the 8788 page book of cricket rules all over Baghdad two weeks before the invasion began.

    Cricket + Mornington Crescent = Win :P

  • BamaBama Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    I'm sorry but Cricket is just a game of Calvinball that an entire country is in on.

    "Despite all the bitching, if Diablo 3 sucks, I will eat my own cock. Counter-claim: If Diablo 3 does not suck, I will have a list of whiners who need to eat cocks." - Zen Vulgarity
  • poshnialloposhniallo Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Thomamelas wrote: »
    Bogart wrote: »
    Irond Will wrote: »
    BobCesca wrote: »
    Bogart wrote: »
    Christ. Three balls left and the Saffers are referring a possible catch.

    so it'll take what like 25 more days?

    woohoo! they held on for the draw!

    Did he throw a googly?

    No, though the last over held a bouncer, a great yorker and a denied caught behind off the glove.

    Now you're just making shit up.

    You're joking, but the funny thing is you will never be sure whether he is or not.

    The best thing about cricket, for me, is explaining it to Japanese people as a prelude to popping their 'pip-pip wot wot bowler-hats and the queen' image of Brits.

    Cricket is fucking insane. And so are we.

    I figure I could take a bear.
  • HaphazardHaphazard Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Krikkit! :P

    One of the things I will probably never understand.

  • WMain00WMain00 Registered User
    edited January 2010
    Oh god Cricket.

    As a Scot I must object to this terrible, confusing, game.

  • OremLKOremLK Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    THEPAIN73 wrote: »
    So it's like baseball then?

    Baseball for pansies.

    currently playing LoL: Polymath
    a fading melody - my indie platformer for the xbox 360
  • TL DRTL DR Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Bama wrote: »
    I'm sorry but Cricket is just a game of Calvinball that an entire country is in on.

    You say that as if it would be a bad thing.

    eokNV.jpg
  • electricitylikesmeelectricitylikesme Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Haphazard wrote: »
    Krikkit! :P

    One of the things I will probably never understand.

    If I get to meet aliens, I'm introducing them to this sport. Thus ensuring the secret British plan of universal domination. Which will then be undercut by their convicts.

  • BamaBama Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Bob, I was actually going to say "Mornington Crescent" instead of "Calvinball," but I thought it would be to anglocentric.

    "Despite all the bitching, if Diablo 3 sucks, I will eat my own cock. Counter-claim: If Diablo 3 does not suck, I will have a list of whiners who need to eat cocks." - Zen Vulgarity
  • ResRes __BANNED USERS
    edited January 2010
    And I'm back. Hello [chat].

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • poshnialloposhniallo Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    I should watch more sports.

    I used to watch sumo, but then it got boring when Asashoryu kept winning everything.

    Cars and Sports. The manly things I know nothing about. I am Unmanly.

    On the other hand, not knowing anything about them frees up tons of brainspace for other shit.

    I figure I could take a bear.
  • nexuscrawlernexuscrawler Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    OremLK wrote: »
    THEPAIN73 wrote: »
    So it's like baseball then?

    Baseball for pansies.

    baseball so dull it goes on for days

  • JustinSane07JustinSane07 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2010
    I actually know most of the cricket terms and how the game is played.

    But it's still fucking retarded.

  • OremLKOremLK Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    poshniallo wrote: »
    I should watch more sports.

    I used to watch sumo, but then it got boring when Asashoryu kept winning everything.

    Cars and Sports. The manly things I know nothing about. I am Unmanly.

    On the other hand, not knowing anything about them frees up tons of brainspace for other shit.

    Until a year or so ago, I hadn't bothered about sports at all since I was a kid. Then I started watching them again and now I think they're pretty great.

    currently playing LoL: Polymath
    a fading melody - my indie platformer for the xbox 360
  • WMain00WMain00 Registered User
    edited January 2010
    1.jpg

    That's an awesome image. It's the day after tomorrow!

  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Ha ha ha! Hiberno-Britannic sport!

  • BogartBogart MR. Lady Anime Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    poshniallo wrote: »
    I used to watch sumo, but then it got boring when Asashoryu kept winning everything.

    I remember watching some sumo ages and ages ago when Channel 4 had the rights for a few seasons. Chionofuji (sp?), also known as The Wolf, was top man then. If I rememver rightly he was one of only a few Yokozuna around at the time.

    I loved their nicknames, especially the enormous dude whose handle was The Dump Truck.

  • GonmunGonmun He keeps kickin' me in mah dickRegistered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Cricket? Nobody understands cricket! You gotta know what a crumpet is to understand cricket! :P

    desc wrote: »
    ~ * swole patrol flying roundhouse kick top performer recognition: April 2014 * ~

  • RyadicRyadic Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    I don't understand anything in the OP. Clearly foreign languages are not for me.

    steam_sig.png
  • amateurhouramateurhour Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    I'd play cricket...

    The funny thing is I actually get a lot of chances to play. I work for HP and we've got a lot of Indians working here. They meet up at the park every weekend to play.

    Here's what I do...
    The Vac - My Science Fiction Epic
    Fortune Pancakes - My Gag-A-Day Comic
  • OremLKOremLK Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    OremLK wrote: »
    THEPAIN73 wrote: »
    So it's like baseball then?

    Baseball for pansies.

    baseball so dull it goes on for days

    I love me some baseball.

    I would change nothing about it in gameplay terms.

    currently playing LoL: Polymath
    a fading melody - my indie platformer for the xbox 360
  • Zen VulgarityZen Vulgarity Ask me about Super Propane and Super Propane accessoriesRegistered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Cricket?

    Baseball.

    And sumo is so terribly rigged it's only fun to watch it in person.

    344B2YT.gifsteamicon48x48.gif Know about web development? I need your help with my professional site!
  • BobCescaBobCesca Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    I'd play cricket...

    The funny thing is I actually get a lot of chances to play. I work for HP and we've got a lot of Indians working here. They meet up at the park every weekend to play.

    cricket is awesome and actually a lot of fun to play.

    I used to play back at school, and it was really quite fun.

  • JustinSane07JustinSane07 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2010
    OremLK wrote: »
    OremLK wrote: »
    THEPAIN73 wrote: »
    So it's like baseball then?

    Baseball for pansies.

    baseball so dull it goes on for days

    I love me some baseball.

    I would change nothing about it in gameplay terms.

    I would kill for a pitch clock to speed the game up.

  • ThomamelasThomamelas “Three films a day, three books a week and records of great music would be enough to make me happy to the day I die.” Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    poshniallo wrote: »
    I should watch more sports.

    I used to watch sumo, but then it got boring when Asashoryu kept winning everything.

    Cars and Sports. The manly things I know nothing about. I am Unmanly.

    On the other hand, not knowing anything about them frees up tons of brainspace for other shit.

    My brother and my dad were the gearheads growing up. I didn't learn to appreciate cars until I started to have take care of my own. My dad owned a garage, and he would gladly explain how to do something, but I was on my own to actually do it.

  • RyadicRyadic Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Gonmun wrote: »
    Cricket? Nobody understands cricket! You gotta know what a crumpet is to understand cricket! :P

    :^:

    Edit:

    Am I the only one that knows this reference?

    steam_sig.png
  • Zen VulgarityZen Vulgarity Ask me about Super Propane and Super Propane accessoriesRegistered User regular
    edited January 2010
    There is a pitch-time rule that no one fucking upholds for no good reason

    But Cricket actually is quite thrilling once you understand it. It's also a blast to play.

    344B2YT.gifsteamicon48x48.gif Know about web development? I need your help with my professional site!
  • ThomamelasThomamelas “Three films a day, three books a week and records of great music would be enough to make me happy to the day I die.” Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    OremLK wrote: »
    OremLK wrote: »
    THEPAIN73 wrote: »
    So it's like baseball then?

    Baseball for pansies.

    baseball so dull it goes on for days

    I love me some baseball.

    I would change nothing about it in gameplay terms.

    I love it as it is. Even the pace is perfect for a slow summer day.

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    I'm terrible with cars, and my father used to put them back together as a young man. I'm just terrible in general at most manly displays.

  • GonmunGonmun He keeps kickin' me in mah dickRegistered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Ryadic wrote: »
    Gonmun wrote: »
    Cricket? Nobody understands cricket! You gotta know what a crumpet is to understand cricket! :P

    :^:

    Edit:

    Am I the only one that knows this reference?

    I hope not!

    desc wrote: »
    ~ * swole patrol flying roundhouse kick top performer recognition: April 2014 * ~

  • ThomamelasThomamelas “Three films a day, three books a week and records of great music would be enough to make me happy to the day I die.” Registered User regular
    edited January 2010
    Ryadic wrote: »
    Gonmun wrote: »
    Cricket? Nobody understands cricket! You gotta know what a crumpet is to understand cricket! :P

    :^:

    Edit:

    Am I the only one that knows this reference?

    No, but some references should just fade away.

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