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Home remedies that don't work but you do anyways because you're a silly goose.
I can redeem this thread. I take it's weight on my shoulders.
So I sliced my hand up pretty bad last month. Had to get stitches, severed a bunch of nerves and such. Instead of antibiotic ointment, my doctor told me to use raw natural honey. Holy shit does that work way better than antibiotic ointment. I was quite impressed.
Steam - Talon Valdez : Xbox Live & LoL - Talonious Monk
I always keep some coat hangers in the back seat of my car.
"Advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice."
"Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process." Imagine all of my posts being spoken by Alec Baldwin
GamerTag: MunkusBeaver ||||| Steam: munkus
For anything clogging the chest, sinuses, nose/throat, or for sore throats related to cough or cold:
Water so hot you can barely drink it, fresh minced garlic, (a fuck-ton of) cayenne, honey, lemon (and if you can manage), about a half-oz. of whiskey.
It is one of those things that line cooks all tend to have imbedded in their brains, and it's really handy for clearing you out, soothing everything, and putting a nice coat of "get fucking healthy" from the top of the sinuses to the bottom of your lungs.
It has saved people from getting lung butter or snot in their food in the past, and probably will for years to come.
Also works if you're not stuck in a hot kitchen. Do not sip, tip the fucker back, garlic bits and all. It hurts.
Bleach for burns instead of cold water or butter... Cold water shocks the nerves and makes them more receptive to heat and throbbing. Luke-warm water is your best because it will still pull heat from your skin without shocking it. Bleach dulls the nerves and all you need to do is apply it to the burn, count to five, and rinse it off. It won't hurt the rest of your skin for that short of a period but it will sure as hell quiet down inflamed nerves. I'm not saying it's good for you, but it definitely works.
When I had left-over pain from a root canal for a month, I got a little vial of clove oil on the recommendation of a pharmacist and rubbed it on the surrounding gums from time to time. Anbesol didn't work, but this killed all my pain (for a short period of time).
One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.
Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.
Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
If you boil down a ghost and mix it with rum you can cure just about anything.
Alcohol is in most home remedies because drunk people don't give a fuck. Same reason Freud gave out coke to cure mental problems. When your skiing down Mount Scarface, you don't worry about shit.
Posts
Not to say that there's necessarily any of it in store-bought ginger ale though.
So I sliced my hand up pretty bad last month. Had to get stitches, severed a bunch of nerves and such. Instead of antibiotic ointment, my doctor told me to use raw natural honey. Holy shit does that work way better than antibiotic ointment. I was quite impressed.
Steam - Talon Valdez : Xbox Live & LoL - Talonious Monk
"Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process."
Imagine all of my posts being spoken by Alec Baldwin
GamerTag: MunkusBeaver ||||| Steam: munkus
COKE GINGER AND LEMON
IT ACTUALLY WORKS
CHINESE PEOPLE
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3
Water so hot you can barely drink it, fresh minced garlic, (a fuck-ton of) cayenne, honey, lemon (and if you can manage), about a half-oz. of whiskey.
It is one of those things that line cooks all tend to have imbedded in their brains, and it's really handy for clearing you out, soothing everything, and putting a nice coat of "get fucking healthy" from the top of the sinuses to the bottom of your lungs.
It has saved people from getting lung butter or snot in their food in the past, and probably will for years to come.
Also works if you're not stuck in a hot kitchen. Do not sip, tip the fucker back, garlic bits and all. It hurts.
Bleach for burns instead of cold water or butter... Cold water shocks the nerves and makes them more receptive to heat and throbbing. Luke-warm water is your best because it will still pull heat from your skin without shocking it. Bleach dulls the nerves and all you need to do is apply it to the burn, count to five, and rinse it off. It won't hurt the rest of your skin for that short of a period but it will sure as hell quiet down inflamed nerves. I'm not saying it's good for you, but it definitely works.
Regardless of whether or not it works.
It is delicious.
Throw some rum in there too people.
Satans..... hints..... I'm a mo bro!
i knew i was missing something. hey, are you still going to bc?
soooooo good
and dang, it sounds like it would be awesome with some sailor j
I need to try this sometime
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3
Sore throat? Salt water.
Cut? Throw some salt water on that shit.
Sinuses clogged? You better snort some damn salt water up there.
I'll ideally be going there if things work out well!
you still going too?
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3
works every time
when are you coming down to visit me?
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3
when I am financially capable
this kinda helps me forget about how horrible my week was
Alcohol is in most home remedies because drunk people don't give a fuck. Same reason Freud gave out coke to cure mental problems. When your skiing down Mount Scarface, you don't worry about shit.
don't come to missouri
this place is so awful
visit me after I've moved somewhere nicer pls
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3
if things work out well. everything's up in the air
if you stay too long there you might catch diseases
looking forward to meeting you if they do!
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3
is nineteen years too long
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3
likewise!
he's the gayest
Tegan and Sara Appreciation Station | LOOKS GOOD! | Fancy Cat Moustache! :{3