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New GOP site asking for ideas for their platform.

CommunistCowCommunistCow Registered User regular
edited May 2010 in Social Entropy++
Funniest thing since sliced bread.

Poe's law wins this site.

Some hilarious ideas include:
"Deport my dog. His English is terrible."
"I want to build Brick Ovens to extract oil from the oil shale that infests this country. We would never have to buy overseas oil again."
"Make all government employees (including Congress) ride exercise bicycles hooked up to power generators."
"We need to keep God in the classrooms. He watches over all our children and we need to spoon feed them his love from a young age. Praise be to Thor! May his mighty hammer smite our enemies!"
"Subsidize the sealing industry. I want to see it in our school lunch programs. Our kids deserve seal."
"There are too many states these days, please eliminate three."

The internet wins.

Edit:
Remember guys: No raiding (Forum rules and all). This thread is to post hilarious shit that is already on the site and to mock them horribly.

CommunistCow on
7521745260_e8e0fc52b8_o.jpg
No, I am not really communist. Yes, it is weird that I use this name.
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Posts

  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Ho boy.

    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • FirmSkaterFirmSkater Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Why the heck does dems really been when even as they go to as if we try to look for that detail when they spend us so we can't just vote on the term that the activist will turn over at the end of the session!?

    sig2.jpg
  • Lord DaveLord Dave Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    hilarious

    Denny's is for winners.
    mkc.pngmkc.pngmkc.pngmontykevin.png
  • SLyMSLyM Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Reading some of these are pretty great

    Steam Starcraft SLeague of Legends
  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    FirmSkater wrote: »
    Why the heck does dems really been when even as they go to as if we try to look for that detail when they spend us so we can't just vote on the term that the activist will turn over at the end of the session!?

    I do not understand this sentence.

    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • Darth AardvarkDarth Aardvark Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    FirmSkater wrote: »
    Why the heck does dems really been when even as they go to as if we try to look for that detail when they spend us so we can't just vote on the term that the activist will turn over at the end of the session!?

    is this a quote from the site or did you just stroke

  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    this is best
    "A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish! And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

    kQwcZLJ.png
  • undeinPiratundeinPirat Registered User
    edited May 2010
    humans are fish

    my worldview is shattered

    we are the merpeople

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] steam: undeinpirat
  • CommunistCowCommunistCow Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Lady Gaga arouses me. I hear she's part man. Does that make me a democrat?

    7521745260_e8e0fc52b8_o.jpg
    No, I am not really communist. Yes, it is weird that I use this name.
  • UnbreakableVowUnbreakableVow YRP...in position It's showtime, girls.Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    "There are too many states these days, please eliminate three."

    Glad someone on there has a sense of humor

    kTNzrVi.png?2
    Disasterrific! | Sometimes I stream PS4 games here | PSN: UnbreakableVow
  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    "There are too many states these days, please eliminate three."

    Glad someone on there has a sense of humor

    Haha, really? Just go look at the suggestions. Every other one is pretty funny.

    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • SLyMSLyM Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Don't you just hate it when you get ready for bed, and just when you begin to settle in under the nice comfy sheets and fluff your pillow you realize— you kinda have to go to the bathroom?

    Hells YES I DO!

    Government, get on this, STAT!

    Steam Starcraft SLeague of Legends
  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    oh god I used their handwritey font in a logo recently!

    kQwcZLJ.png
  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Impeach Berry Hughsane Tortillo. He keeps going against the will of the PEOPLE!! A majority of VOTES is not a majority of PEOPLE!!
    ???

    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • 101101 Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    and then WaM was the GOP

  • CommunistCowCommunistCow Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    I propose that we limit the constitution to 140 characters, for great justice.
    We should limit the constituational rights of people we disagree with.

    God my throat hurts from laughing so fucking hard. Can we take bets on how much of this content will be deleted and or ignored if it goes against their current platform.

    I'm going to be there is a 140% chance of that happening.

    7521745260_e8e0fc52b8_o.jpg
    No, I am not really communist. Yes, it is weird that I use this name.
  • HenroidHenroid Gibberish Cold white sand!Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Oh this is good.

    "Ultima Online Pre-Trammel is the perfect example of why libertarians are full of shit." - @Ludious
    PA Lets Play Archive - Twitter - Blog
  • Ruby RhodRuby Rhod Multipass!Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Sue Lowden was definitely on to something with her idea of bartering chickens for health care, but why not just make chickens official United States currency? Money doesn't grow on trees, but there's no reason it can't grow in our CAFOs.

    Hahaha

  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    I mean usually the whole "Haha Republicans!" is really old, but this is really funny.

    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • SLyMSLyM Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    It's like they just made the website and put up a sign to say "Troll republicans here."

    Steam Starcraft SLeague of Legends
  • FirmSkaterFirmSkater Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Unavailable

    A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now.
    Please wait a moment and try again

    sig2.jpg
  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Why is there only a tap for water in my home? There should be a system in place to pipe other commodities (soda, hamburgers) into the homes of those who can afford them. Also why do the pipes only go one way? I propose a FREE and JUST system that would allow the pipes to give as well as take. This would allow one to shove a tip back into the pipe, affectively thanking it for the burgers it has provided them.

    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • SpudgeSpudge Registered User
    edited May 2010
    We should rename maracas "freedom sticks" to punish Mexico for stealing jobs from us.

    Play With Me
    Spoiler:
  • Ruby RhodRuby Rhod Multipass!Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Make sure in the next Batman movie Christian Bale doesn't make that stupid voice

  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Lol, this website cost taxpayers $100,000. Thank you party of fiscal responsibility.
    Haha, is this true?

    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • undeinPiratundeinPirat Registered User
    edited May 2010
    i have heard from multiple people it is tax funded

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] steam: undeinpirat
  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    my god, burger pipes

    kQwcZLJ.png
  • MrMonroeMrMonroe Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    it's a scheme to get phone numbers and nothing more

    no one is going to read these comments except other people who've shown up to troll and the very dumbest republicans

  • Ruby RhodRuby Rhod Multipass!Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Oh god
    Repeal the US Postal Service's monopoly on mail. Allow private businesses to compete by allowing them to offer cheaper rates than the USPS.

  • CommunistCowCommunistCow Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Require elected officials to get receipts from their visits to ladies of the night.

    7521745260_e8e0fc52b8_o.jpg
    No, I am not really communist. Yes, it is weird that I use this name.
  • SLyMSLyM Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    The GOP must return to its Pro-Life principles. No longer should we allow death into this country. The USA was founded by people looking for the Fountain of Youth in the hopes of gaining immortality, and it is high time we devoted all possible resources to completing this quest.

    Steam Starcraft SLeague of Legends
  • HenroidHenroid Gibberish Cold white sand!Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Lol, this website cost taxpayers $100,000. Thank you party of fiscal responsibility.
    Haha, is this true?

    I live for this stuff.

    "Ultima Online Pre-Trammel is the perfect example of why libertarians are full of shit." - @Ludious
    PA Lets Play Archive - Twitter - Blog
  • FirmSkaterFirmSkater Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    I like how they called it "America Speaking Out" as opposed to "speaking up" or something to that effect. Makes it sound like a bunch of people rebelling against the gub'ment

    sig2.jpg
  • CommunistCowCommunistCow Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Lets be join canada and become another province. That way they can teach us how to manage our banks and budget.
    Sell Michigan to Canada.

    7521745260_e8e0fc52b8_o.jpg
    No, I am not really communist. Yes, it is weird that I use this name.
  • HenroidHenroid Gibberish Cold white sand!Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Someone is registered on the site as Ronald Reagan.

    "Ultima Online Pre-Trammel is the perfect example of why libertarians are full of shit." - @Ludious
    PA Lets Play Archive - Twitter - Blog
  • SquallSquall hap cloud Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Sell Michigan to Canada.

    :x.

    alt post by anti: :D

  • MrMonroeMrMonroe Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    FirmSkater wrote: »
    I like how they called it "America Speaking Out" as opposed to "speaking up" or something to that effect. Makes it sound like a bunch of people rebelling against the gub'ment

    that is their target audience, yes

  • Ruby RhodRuby Rhod Multipass!Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Deport all Mexicans. I hate the fact that my kids speak Spanish as their first language because of their nanny. (A Swedish nanny was too expensive. Not everyone is a golf pro or member of Congress. Not that I want my kids speaking some atheist language like Swedish! Gosh, where are all the American nannies???)

  • HenroidHenroid Gibberish Cold white sand!Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    Bibles should not be used to pleasure a quim.

    "Ultima Online Pre-Trammel is the perfect example of why libertarians are full of shit." - @Ludious
    PA Lets Play Archive - Twitter - Blog
  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited May 2010
    MrMonroe wrote: »
    FirmSkater wrote: »
    I like how they called it "America Speaking Out" as opposed to "speaking up" or something to that effect. Makes it sound like a bunch of people rebelling against the gub'ment

    that is their target audience, yes

    The young, hip Twitter crowd.

    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
«13456
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