Our new Indie Games subforum is now open for business in G&T. Go and check it out, you might land a code for a free game. If you're developing an indie game and want to post about it, follow these directions. If you don't, he'll break your legs! Hahaha! Seriously though.
Our rules have been updated and given their own forum. Go and look at them! They are nice, and there may be new ones that you didn't know about! Hooray for rules! Hooray for The System! Hooray for Conforming!

My underage brother is planning a beer pong tournament

noir_bloodnoir_blood Registered User regular
edited August 2010 in Help / Advice Forum
And not being very discreet about it, advertising it in his twitter/facebook page. It's taking place in our parent's home.

The facts:

He's 20, and for the most part is a good kid. No previous issues with alcohol or the law, etc. Average basically.
I don't live at home anymore. I have an okay relationship with everyone, but I don't really keep in touch, not for some deep dark reason, but mostly cause that's just the way I am.

The question:

Should I do anything about this? I mean, part of me is like "Meh, they're 20 and at least they're doing it at home where it's safe."

But I'm worried about a worst case scenario thing where something goes wrong-wouldn't my mom be responsible/get in trouble for hosting(knowingly or not) underage drinking?

noir_blood on
Spoiler:
«134

Posts

  • The Crowing OneThe Crowing One Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    The most I would do would be to simply send your brother a message saying this. Don't try to be a hero and swoop in and save him from himself, but politely and with care point out that the internet is a big place and that he may not want everyone to know.

    Otherwise you run the risk of being a meddler.

    3rddocbottom.jpg
  • EshEsh Sunshine! Kittens! Rainbows! Smiles! Portland, ORRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    I'm not a lawyer, but I think your mother could very well be held accountable for anything that goes wrong in her home.

    "At first he thought it might be a natural occurrence - maybe a rabbit. But upon closer inspection, it was clear a knife had been used. And rabbits don't carry knives."
  • HeirHeir Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Personally, I would just tell your mom. In the end they could be responsible for any legal issues since he's underage. Normally I don't agree with telling on siblings...but in this case where they could get in some serious trouble I would.

    camo_sig2.png
  • bowenbowen Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Wonder if they're specifically playing beer pong, or, just the game itself without drinking/beer.

    And yes, the largest thing I'd be worried about is the other people, not him, as your parents would be on the line if someone was drinking underage and, maybe, got into a car accident (or someone got killed, as unfortunate as that'd be). That's jail time just for the letting the minors drink I believe.

    This is a bad situation all around, personally, I'd just tell your parents/mother know that you overheard someone talking about it in passing. But, it'll probably just mean he'll sneak around next time. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

  • EshEsh Sunshine! Kittens! Rainbows! Smiles! Portland, ORRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    "At first he thought it might be a natural occurrence - maybe a rabbit. But upon closer inspection, it was clear a knife had been used. And rabbits don't carry knives."
  • MurphyMurphy Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    I'd contact your parents about it. I mean, yeah, he's 20, but that's still legally underage, and his friends are likely all around his age as well. Also, he's clearly hiding it from your parents (something that almost seems like some sort of underage rite of passage, but it's still ill-advised), and that's not cool. Or at least, it isn't in my book.

    I mean, it's not like I didn't drink before I was 21. But I always did it elsewhere, not like, in my parent's house. It just seems irresponsible (which admittedly, is sort of par for the course at that age).

  • Canada_jezusCanada_jezus Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    You hear about these sort of things happening sometimes. Expected 30 people, got 300+, not sure where you live but here parents can be held accountable. A few men wreck up three gardens and a car and you're looking at some serious costs.

    Tell your mom, i mean, you never know.

    You know who I fucking hate? Pony.

    I don't know why, I just felt the need to say that.
  • bowenbowen Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    I don't know why you'd be unpopular for letting responsible parties know something that they could be liable for, damage wise. That's what I'd say to do. Telling the brother just means he'll be more secretive next time, honestly, plus put other people at risk (at least until he's 21, by law).

  • adytumadytum Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    You hear about these sort of things happening sometimes. Expected 30 people, got 300+, not sure where you live but here parents can be held accountable. A few men wreck up three gardens and a car and you're looking at some serious costs.

    Tell your mom, i mean, you never know.

    Happened to my cousin; jewelry was stolen, house was trashed..

    If he's advertising an underage drinking party on facebook, he's not very bright and deserves to have his plans foiled.

    etxvv5.jpg
  • VisionOfClarityVisionOfClarity Registered User
    edited August 2010
    If my sister was that stupid to plan something like this so indiscreetly I'd bust her ass. My mom would have been called within about 30 seconds of me finding it. Publicly planning to do something illegal in my parents' house that they could get in trouble with the law for? Oh hell no, that's just stupid and wrong.

  • CoffeyCoffey Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    This is why I hate movies like Beerfest because it sends the wrong message to younger people. Namely that "we should drink because it's fun! Look at all these games we can play!" The last thing you want to mix with alcohol is impressionable, immature people that obviously make bad decisions.

    Although I do generally believe that the legal drinking age in the United States should probably be 18, since you can vote and sign-up for the military at that age (which is a different debate altogether), the fact is that it is currently 21 and your sibling is obviously an idiot since he thinks advertising an underage drinking get-together on social sites is a good decision.

    One five-minute phone call to your mother/father is probably the best, most hands-off approach that you could take. Assuming, of course, that your parents are at least semi-responsible.

  • noir_bloodnoir_blood Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    bowen wrote: »
    Wonder if they're specifically playing beer pong, or, just the game itself without drinking/beer.
    Thanks for the response guys. And it's with beer. Again, he's being pretty stupid about it, created a facebook events page where he outlines how part of the entry fee will be used to pay for the beer.

    Spoiler:
  • MurphyMurphy Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    noir_blood wrote: »
    bowen wrote: »
    Wonder if they're specifically playing beer pong, or, just the game itself without drinking/beer.
    Thanks for the response guys. And it's with beer. Again, he's being pretty stupid about it, created a facebook events page where he outlines how part of the entry fee will be used to pay for the beer.

    Yeah, you should definitely call your parents. Like, right now.

  • DelzhandDelzhand motivated battle programmerRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    I'd say protecting your parents from potential legal ramifications is a better reason to do this than just to bust his chops, but yeah, you need to tell them what's going down.

    jk0Btsj.png
  • Bliss 101Bliss 101 Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    The fact that 20 is underage (for drinking) in America is mind-boggling, but I'm gonna have to agree that your parents need to know about this. However, don't just call your mom: talk to your brother and make him discuss it with your mom. If he won't do that, then talk to your mom.

    MSL59.jpg
  • TubularLuggageTubularLuggage Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    The home owner is liable for anything that happens. Not to mention, as has been pointed out, announcing this event on facebook could very well lead to this getting out of hand.

    I don't get kids these days. When I was younger, half the fun of underage drinking was sneaking around with it.
    Also, it still boggles me that the drinking age in the US is 21.

  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    The home owner is liable for anything that happens. Not to mention, as has been pointed out, announcing this event on facebook could very well lead to this getting out of hand.

    I don't get kids these days. When I was younger, half the fun of underage drinking was sneaking around with it.
    Also, it still boggles me that the drinking age in the US is 21.

    It boggles me that I'm a veteran and still can't legally drink

    Seriously what the fuck

  • Dark_SideDark_Side Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Probably won't be a huge deal, but yeah, moms should hear about this. If only to teach the dummy a lesson about not advertising drinking parties on facebook.

  • DeebaserDeebaser At the corporate garage sale This is cheap and plentifulRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    I wouldn't narc on my own brother, personally. 20 is hardly a baby. However, I would tell him to post that event as private/invite only and send him the article Esh posted.

  • angrylinuxgeekangrylinuxgeek Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    The most I would do would be to simply send your brother a message saying this. Don't try to be a hero and swoop in and save him from himself, but politely and with care point out that the internet is a big place and that he may not want everyone to know.

    Otherwise you run the risk of being a meddler.

    this. all these wet blankets suggesting you call your mom are blowing it way out of proportion. it's just some kids having fun.

    sQwJu.png
  • EshEsh Sunshine! Kittens! Rainbows! Smiles! Portland, ORRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    The most I would do would be to simply send your brother a message saying this. Don't try to be a hero and swoop in and save him from himself, but politely and with care point out that the internet is a big place and that he may not want everyone to know.

    Otherwise you run the risk of being a meddler.

    this. all these wet blankets suggesting you call your mom are blowing it way out of proportion. it's just some kids having fun.

    It's not that. It's that it's in his parent's home so anything that happens, they're liable for. If he wants to grow up and get his own place, he can do all the underage drinking he wants there.

    "At first he thought it might be a natural occurrence - maybe a rabbit. But upon closer inspection, it was clear a knife had been used. And rabbits don't carry knives."
  • SyphonBlueSyphonBlue Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Stop being a baby and let your brother have some fun.

    metroid_sig.jpg
  • UsagiUsagi WOMP WOMPRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    SyphonBlue wrote: »
    Stop being a baby and let your brother have some fun.

    Yeah that's not even close to good advice

    It's not being a baby to have concerns over his brother's stupid idea, and additionally that his mom may end up being liable for providing alcohol to minors since it's her home

    You heard it here first, folks.
    Putting your finger in someone's butthole.
    Basically the same as flowers.
  • MurphyMurphy Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    See, this is why I initially said my opinion would be unpopular (though clearly it isn't as much as I thought I would). Wet blanket? Being a baby?

    How about being responsible, and an adult. Both things that his brother clearly isn't, and needs some damn guidance on.

  • The Crowing OneThe Crowing One Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Esh wrote: »
    The most I would do would be to simply send your brother a message saying this. Don't try to be a hero and swoop in and save him from himself, but politely and with care point out that the internet is a big place and that he may not want everyone to know.

    Otherwise you run the risk of being a meddler.

    this. all these wet blankets suggesting you call your mom are blowing it way out of proportion. it's just some kids having fun.

    It's not that. It's that it's in his parent's home so anything that happens, they're liable for. If he wants to grow up and get his own place, he can do all the underage drinking he wants there.

    Kids do this. It is far from anything out of the ordinary.

    Go ahead and speak with your mother, OP, if you like but please be aware of the backlash that will inevitably fall on you when you screw around with someone else's life. No one likes having their plans ruined, and sometimes plans have to ruin themselves to teach lessons.

    There is, of course, a liability issue. There is also the fact that in less than 12 months your brother will be of legal drinking age. If your brother was 16 or even 18 there would be a clear-cut issue. At the age of 20 this is nothing out of the ordinary for someone who is planning a tournament.

    Talk to your brother first and gauge if there's a problem. If you get the impression that there will be 400 people in the house, and your brother seems not to be able to handle the scope or intensity of what he created, it'll be far easier to speak to your parents.

    3rddocbottom.jpg
  • That_Spoony_BardThat_Spoony_Bard Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    The most I would do would be to simply send your brother a message saying this. Don't try to be a hero and swoop in and save him from himself, but politely and with care point out that the internet is a big place and that he may not want everyone to know.

    Otherwise you run the risk of being a meddler.

    this. all these wet blankets suggesting you call your mom are blowing it way out of proportion. it's just some kids having fun.

    Yes, we are all wet blankets for wanting to stop an underage party that the owner doesn't know about, and could be held liable for. God knows nothing happens when people drink. Damn them.

  • SyphonBlueSyphonBlue Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Murphy wrote: »
    See, this is why I initially said my opinion would be unpopular (though clearly it isn't as much as I thought I would). Wet blanket? Being a baby?

    How about being responsible, and an adult. Both things that his brother clearly isn't, and needs some damn guidance on.

    Jesus, it's just a kid having a party.

    Edit: Not even a kid! He's 20.

    metroid_sig.jpg
  • MurphyMurphy Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Just because it's not out of the ordinary doesn't make it a good idea.

    And what "backlash?" Oh no, my brother didn't get to have a party. In a year he can hold one, legally. Boo hoo for him. He's got a real hard way to go.

  • MurphyMurphy Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    SyphonBlue wrote: »
    Murphy wrote: »
    See, this is why I initially said my opinion would be unpopular (though clearly it isn't as much as I thought I would). Wet blanket? Being a baby?

    How about being responsible, and an adult. Both things that his brother clearly isn't, and needs some damn guidance on.

    Jesus, it's just a kid having a party.

    Edit: Not even a kid! He's 20.

    A party with liquor that he is legally not able to purchase or imbibe, thus making his parents liable. In a year, he can do as he pleases, though still maybe not in his parents house without their knowledge. If he wants to do it somewhere else, have at it. But the way in which he's doing it, and the location he's chosen are both poor ideas.

  • EshEsh Sunshine! Kittens! Rainbows! Smiles! Portland, ORRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Esh wrote: »
    The most I would do would be to simply send your brother a message saying this. Don't try to be a hero and swoop in and save him from himself, but politely and with care point out that the internet is a big place and that he may not want everyone to know.

    Otherwise you run the risk of being a meddler.

    this. all these wet blankets suggesting you call your mom are blowing it way out of proportion. it's just some kids having fun.

    It's not that. It's that it's in his parent's home so anything that happens, they're liable for. If he wants to grow up and get his own place, he can do all the underage drinking he wants there.

    Kids do this. It is far from anything out of the ordinary.

    Go ahead and speak with your mother, OP, if you like but please be aware of the backlash that will inevitably fall on you when you screw around with someone else's life. No one likes having their plans ruined, and sometimes plans have to ruin themselves to teach lessons.

    There is, of course, a liability issue. There is also the fact that in less than 12 months your brother will be of legal drinking age. If your brother was 16 or even 18 there would be a clear-cut issue. At the age of 20 this is nothing out of the ordinary for someone who is planning a tournament.

    Talk to your brother first and gauge if there's a problem. If you get the impression that there will be 400 people in the house, and your brother seems not to be able to handle the scope or intensity of what he created, it'll be far easier to speak to your parents.

    It doesn't matter what age he is. He's under 21. The law doesn't care that he's less than 12 months away. It's clear cut if he's 20 years 364 days as it would be if he was 10.

    What backlash? His brother will be miffed for a little bit? Who cares? If his brother wants to do adult things, he needs to act like an adult and stop living with his parents, where then the responsibility for said party will fall on his shoulders.

    It his parent's house. Thus making it wrong. End of story.

    "At first he thought it might be a natural occurrence - maybe a rabbit. But upon closer inspection, it was clear a knife had been used. And rabbits don't carry knives."
  • DeebaserDeebaser At the corporate garage sale This is cheap and plentifulRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    SyphonBlue wrote: »
    Murphy wrote: »
    See, this is why I initially said my opinion would be unpopular (though clearly it isn't as much as I thought I would). Wet blanket? Being a baby?

    How about being responsible, and an adult. Both things that his brother clearly isn't, and needs some damn guidance on.

    Jesus, it's just a kid having a party.

    Edit: Not even a kid! He's 20
    .

    Limed so fucking hard. These aren't 15 year olds watering down daddy's liquor cabinet to fill lines previously established with post it notes. These are 20 year olds pounding natty ice and playing some pong.

    What the hell were you guys doing at 20?

  • UsagiUsagi WOMP WOMPRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    SyphonBlue wrote: »
    Murphy wrote: »
    See, this is why I initially said my opinion would be unpopular (though clearly it isn't as much as I thought I would). Wet blanket? Being a baby?

    How about being responsible, and an adult. Both things that his brother clearly isn't, and needs some damn guidance on.

    Jesus, it's just a kid having a party.

    Edit: Not even a kid! He's 20.

    OK, in a different light I'd absolutely agree with you

    If the FB message said something like "Hey, lets party in my backyard" or "Stupid game night" I'd be likely to let a beer or dozen slide for that

    But he advertised in a public manner that he is an underage person having a party for the purpose of getting shitfaced and having binge drinking competitions. Totally different animal.

    You heard it here first, folks.
    Putting your finger in someone's butthole.
    Basically the same as flowers.
  • angrylinuxgeekangrylinuxgeek Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    probably because managing other people's lives for them is crossing the line and not how adults act?

    this seems like some sort of projection thing. damn those kids for having fun drinking while I'm in my basement not doing anything! nobody should be allowed to have fun, ever! this sort of thing doesn't occur all the time or anything!

    sQwJu.png
  • ChickeenChickeen Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    I'd call the cops. Some of life's lessons are best learned in lockup.

  • EshEsh Sunshine! Kittens! Rainbows! Smiles! Portland, ORRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    SyphonBlue wrote: »
    Murphy wrote: »
    See, this is why I initially said my opinion would be unpopular (though clearly it isn't as much as I thought I would). Wet blanket? Being a baby?

    How about being responsible, and an adult. Both things that his brother clearly isn't, and needs some damn guidance on.

    Jesus, it's just a kid having a party.

    Edit: Not even a kid! He's 20.

    20 = kid. Especially when booze is involved.

    "At first he thought it might be a natural occurrence - maybe a rabbit. But upon closer inspection, it was clear a knife had been used. And rabbits don't carry knives."
  • UsagiUsagi WOMP WOMPRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Deebaser wrote: »
    SyphonBlue wrote: »
    Murphy wrote: »
    See, this is why I initially said my opinion would be unpopular (though clearly it isn't as much as I thought I would). Wet blanket? Being a baby?

    How about being responsible, and an adult. Both things that his brother clearly isn't, and needs some damn guidance on.

    Jesus, it's just a kid having a party.

    Edit: Not even a kid! He's 20
    .

    Limed so fucking hard. These aren't 15 year olds watering down daddy's liquor cabinet to fill lines previously established with post it notes. These are 20 year olds pounding natty ice and playing some pong.

    What the hell were you guys doing at 20?

    Drinking with friends in my own fucking apartment and not being an idiot to tell the universe I was doing it

    You heard it here first, folks.
    Putting your finger in someone's butthole.
    Basically the same as flowers.
  • That_Spoony_BardThat_Spoony_Bard Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    While I'm not too big on the drinking age in the US, it's the law regardless.

    The guy is having an underage drinking party at his parents house. The PARENTS are held liable if anything happens.

    If he wants to hold a party at his own place (like Esh said), where HE would be liable for anything that happens, then so be it. That's not the case though.

  • EshEsh Sunshine! Kittens! Rainbows! Smiles! Portland, ORRegistered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Usagi wrote: »
    Deebaser wrote: »
    SyphonBlue wrote: »
    Murphy wrote: »
    See, this is why I initially said my opinion would be unpopular (though clearly it isn't as much as I thought I would). Wet blanket? Being a baby?

    How about being responsible, and an adult. Both things that his brother clearly isn't, and needs some damn guidance on.

    Jesus, it's just a kid having a party.

    Edit: Not even a kid! He's 20
    .

    Limed so fucking hard. These aren't 15 year olds watering down daddy's liquor cabinet to fill lines previously established with post it notes. These are 20 year olds pounding natty ice and playing some pong.

    What the hell were you guys doing at 20?

    Drinking with friends in my own fucking apartment and not being an idiot to tell the universe I was doing it

    I for sure drank before I was 21. I also had my own apartment at 17.

    Again, what all the "Let him do it!" camp are missing is that the OP is concerned about his parent's liability and possible damage to their property, not as to if his brother is getting drunk or not.

    "At first he thought it might be a natural occurrence - maybe a rabbit. But upon closer inspection, it was clear a knife had been used. And rabbits don't carry knives."
  • eternalbleternalbl Registered User
    edited August 2010
    The most I would do would be to simply send your brother a message saying this. Don't try to be a hero and swoop in and save him from himself, but politely and with care point out that the internet is a big place and that he may not want everyone to know.

    Otherwise you run the risk of being a meddler.

    this. all these wet blankets suggesting you call your mom are blowing it way out of proportion. it's just some kids having fun.

    Yes, we are all wet blankets for wanting to stop an underage party that the owner doesn't know about, and could be held liable for. God knows nothing happens when people drink. Damn them.

    Hey, the Mom might know and be ok with it, we don't know this at all.

    OP, you know your brother better than anyone, if you think he's getting himself in over his head, make sure your parents are aware. If you think he can take care of himself and is respectful of your parents home, let him know that publicly advertising the party on facebook might get him more attention than he wants.

    Easy-Shmeasy.

    Spoiler:
  • a5ehrena5ehren Registered User regular
    edited August 2010
    Usagi wrote: »
    Deebaser wrote: »
    SyphonBlue wrote: »
    Murphy wrote: »
    See, this is why I initially said my opinion would be unpopular (though clearly it isn't as much as I thought I would). Wet blanket? Being a baby?

    How about being responsible, and an adult. Both things that his brother clearly isn't, and needs some damn guidance on.

    Jesus, it's just a kid having a party.

    Edit: Not even a kid! He's 20
    .

    Limed so fucking hard. These aren't 15 year olds watering down daddy's liquor cabinet to fill lines previously established with post it notes. These are 20 year olds pounding natty ice and playing some pong.

    What the hell were you guys doing at 20?

    Drinking with friends in my own fucking apartment and not being an idiot to tell the universe I was doing it

    Yeah for real. He should move out if he wants to party.

«134
This discussion has been closed.