What the fuck is this?
Glossolalia, the SE++ forum RPG series started up by DE?AD two years ago.
Oh this is that one roleplaying thread that I never click...
That's right! Hopefully this should clear things up for you!
So what exactly is this all about?
It's a play-by-post RPG that has a tendency to get fairly silly, run by our modest GMs DE?AD and Dubh. We've gone through a number of games already: from Glossolalia 4++ (which covered a scat-filled medieval setting to one filled with space-faring cats), to RADlands (Post-Apocalyptic), to the two newest games, Deucarta (Science-based medieval) and Royal Blue (Wacky narrative-based world where any and all things exist).
Alright, can I make a character to kick sand in your character's face?
Sure! Currently we have two games running: Deucarta (run by Dubh) and Royal Blue (DE?AD). The former has already reached the player cap, but the latter isn't starting until 22 Nov so feel free to make your interest known in the thread and we'll help you out!
So how do I make a character?
We play using DE?AD's homemade 100% system, a free-form set of guidelines that whittle your character sheet into two neat lines of text. All rolls are done with a d100, but here's the kicker: the GMs are kind enough to take all the logistics on their side! That means 0% number crunching and power-gamey bullshit, 100% narrative gameplay.
The link to the rules is at the top of the thread, and the GMs and other players will surely help you make your character!
Click HERE for the rules on how to make your character!
Alright, so which game should I play?
Pretty much just Royal Blue, read about it below:
Magic is science. Golems are robots. Spirit philosophers roam the land. Psychics and Wizards battle over ancient artifacts that defy all natural law and reason. This is Deucarta.
Pack your bags and don't forget your sword, 'cause there will be Hell to pay before this journey is over and you don't got the time to stop for lunch.
Choose your adventure! (During play, include the two code words with your stat line!)
Characters: Marinus (AA), Rok (T4CT), Ess (Squall), Epictetus (Shock), Aaron (Stilts), Arthur (Dux), Y (DE?AD)
"Our time together in the League of Rovers was short, but was beneficial to us both. The ban on privateer organizations has hit our type hard, but I wish to continue to our services to the public underground, away from government scrutiny. With my connections and your skills, we could take advantage of this revolution and gain a great deal of wealth, or even favor from the winning side. These are uncertain times, and at the very least we can save a few lives while making a better living than working at the prisons or on riot control. Meet at the boathouse at the end of Omen street, near the ruined lighthouse. We can work out the details there."
Characters: Garent (Cyense), Desmond (Tommy), West (Shabooty), Aralia (Anti)
(Fliers sent to various wizard academies and mercenary companies)
EXPLORE untamed wilds!
DISCOVER ancient ruins and legendary artifacts!
MINGLE with barbarian warlords!
HUNT rare beasts!
BECOME part of the most important research EVER!
Research assistants needed to conduct retrieval and courier services for acclaimed royal researcher Armades Kinas, currently conducting research in Sevyn Turs, deep within the Dreamwilds. Rooms and supplies provided per diem, payment will be rendered after each job. Inquire at your local arcane college for more details and to schedule an interview. References required.
[The Mediran Plains][Dokk]
Characters: Gorlaf (Cheese), Castleguard (Rane), Furnace (Dichotomy), Carmine Beel (Valve), John (Speed), Baird (Captain K), Shu (Bahamut)
(Backroom of a closed ale house in the city-state of Etlin)
"All right you bastards, the gates of Etlin are closed up tighter than the princess's cunt with Jevin's army at the gate. The city can hold up for a few months, give or take, before supplies are out. After that? We're crushed under the boot heels of those slavering rock gnawers. The council doesn't have a lot of options, and that's were I come in- recruiting you would-be mercenaries to bust out and find a way to end this siege. The other city states aren't keen on getting involved, and that has to change for Etlin to have a chance at living through this. I'm not promising a great deal of wealth, here, but I can guarantee a shit load of action, fame, and- if everything turns out lucky- the gratitude of goddamn civilization. Can you pussies take the blood oath and fight this out to the end? If you can't, turn your ass around, march out that door and get your pale white ass out of my sight."
[Rules for Character Creation]
The Code of the Royal Blue
An Agent must be an upstanding citizen and an exemplary person of impeachable moral fiber.
An Agent sacrifices himself to protect others. To do less is grounds for removal.
An Agent suffers no weakness of character that would render him a danger to others.
An Agent wears his badge proudly, and openly. His uniform is the colour of the Shield.
An Agent upholds Compassion, Peace, and Freedom, but above all Justice.
An Agent is before all things is an Agent.
Character Concepts must be delivered in two sentences or less
Characters are outstanding at whatever they do.
Characters must want
to be in the Royal Blue.
Characters must want
to do good.
[DLC ACCESSORIZERS AND BAUBLES]URL="https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_donations&business=MTWSharlow%40gmail%2ecom&lc=US&no_note=1&no_shipping=1¤cy_code=USD&bn=PP%2dDonationsBF%3abtn_donateCC_LG%2egif%3aNonHosted"]Add Points[/URL
[Armor: -5% [P] Damage; Distracting: Inflicts a -10% penalty on attacks against you, or a -15% penalty if you have Hot]
[Bloody Raccoon Armor][25%]
[Leo's cousin has acquired a set of hide armor he found on a dead woodsman in what used to be yellowstone. It appears to be a heavy leather jacket lined with blood-stained, and highly iRADiated, raccoon fur. It's quite comfortable.] [Armor -5% [P] Damage; Gliding: After running your full [P] in feet, you may glide an equal distance.][32000 RADLand Points]
[A collection of stylish hats.][2000 RADLand Points]
[Glossolalia Platinum Account]
[A platinum card with magnetized strip. It has a picture of a starship on it. Just knowing you own the card fills you with pride and a sense of accomplishment. You gain +10% character points.][89000000 RADLand Points]
[Glossolalia Black Account]
[A heavy, black graphite card with a picture of a strange city engraved into it. Just knowing you own it makes you feel suave and important. Requires Platinum Account.][Special: The Card grants you a +10% bonus to your highest stat for determining when you are RAD Poisoned or Stressed Out; VIP: You're a very important person, NPCs know it, and will react favorably.][9800000000 RADLand Points]
[Introducing the Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection! Be the envy of your friends! Impress women! Show that dick at work who's boss! You are! If you collect Glossolalia Collectible Card Colelction Cards! Each Card comes with a unique, useful, and occasionally devastating Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Card Capability! Collect all the Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Cards and be the Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Card Collection Commander! And, thanks to the patented Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Carry-Over, all Cards remains with you through all Glossolalia-Brand Games! Only 50000 Glossolalia Points, ORDER NOW!
[Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Cards Currently Available]
...and many more coming soon!
Seasons now available on HDDVD!
There's no way I'm reading through all of this bullshit.
Yeah don't, it's all crap. Also you don't need to know any of it for the new campaigns.
Glossolalia 4++:            
RADlands:                    
Deucarta & Royal Blue: