WANT TRINE? HERE'S HOW TO GET IT. (ACTUALLY I'M OUT.)
Iolo was awesome enough to gift me a copy of Just Cause 2, so I'm passing along the love with a giftpack of Trine today! I already own it, so I have 8 of these puppies to give away.
What do you have to do? A GOOD DEED.
I'm serious. Go out and do a good deed, right now. Help an old lady cross the street. Refill the coffee, even though you didn't take the last cup. Be nice to someone you're not normally nice to.
Then come back here and tell us about it. (Also, PM me because this thread moves too fast and I easily might miss it.)
We're running on the honour system here, boys and girls.
MAKE ME PROUD.
EDIT: BTW, send me an email address I can gift this to when you PM me. If you've already PM'd me and haven't included an email addres, PM me again, please.
8/8 gone!
0/8 remaining!
AND I'M OUT!
Thanks for everyone who participated, but I'm out!
Thanks Cliffordius for Osmos. I was riding extremely low today (just got back from the dr office - officially have Strep throat, pink eye caused by the strep) and I came home to a new game. Wooo!!
I'm glad I could brighten your day. As you play Osmos, imagine that you are one of your own white blood cells, gobbling up those nasty germs that afflict you.
Want Beat Hazard? Make up a movie synopsis using the game's name as the movie title, best one wins.
Want KotOR? Design an awesome lightsaber, 2 copies to gift. Doesn't need to be a masterpiece, but I've pre empted you filthy mogrels so no dongs.
Want DiRT 2? Show me something awesome to do with cars, doesn't matter what it is.
Gogo.
For KOTOR:
A fancy lightsaber. The blade's length and color can be adjusted with the two knobs on the right, which adds significant complexity to the inner working, resulting in a much larger hilt. It was built for a paranoid left-handed Sith, so there's a fake power button on the other side. A right-handed Jedi would press that, setting off a deadly booby-trap. The Sith was also clumsy, so the power buttons are oversized.
Hi everyone!
Anyone making a group to get TRINE or/and Lead and Gold? Those are the only games I would really like from today's sale, so I would definitely like in on that!
WANT TRINE? HERE'S HOW TO GET IT. (ACTUALLY I'M OUT.)
Iolo was awesome enough to gift me a copy of Just Cause 2, so I'm passing along the love with a giftpack of Trine today! I already own it, so I have 8 of these puppies to give away.
What do you have to do? A GOOD DEED.
I'm serious. Go out and do a good deed, right now. Help an old lady cross the street. Refill the coffee, even though you didn't take the last cup. Be nice to someone you're not normally nice to.
Then come back here and tell us about it. (Also, PM me because this thread moves too fast and I easily might miss it.)
We're running on the honour system here, boys and girls.
MAKE ME PROUD.
EDIT: BTW, send me an email address I can gift this to when you PM me. If you've already PM'd me and haven't included an email addres, PM me again, please.
8/8 gone!
0/8 remaining!
AND I'M OUT!
Thanks for everyone who participated, but I'm out!
Thanks so much for spreading the Christmas cheer!
Thank you for Trine!
Elin on
Switch SW-5832-5050-0149
PSN Hypacia
Xbox HypaciaMinnow
Discord Hypacia#0391
Double thanks for Trine, and for everyone just randomly offering games for organized silliness - not even December yet, but its like Christmas in November!
Draysoth on
WiiU ID - Draysoth1
Xbox Live - Draysoth1
PSN - Draysoth
Steam - Draysoth
3DS - 2320-6133-3744
Please let me know if you add me!
If you refuse to do something nice and post about it, then here's an another way to get 1 of 5 copies of Trine:
Set your beatboxing on loop;
I want to see a short rap about a wizard, any wizard, at least longer than a haiku.
No profanity please, but extra points if you mention his "reputation with the ladies"
Extra extra points if you can perform it
deadline is at the end of this thread.
Edit: deadline is the end of this thread.
rRootagea on
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MaddocI'm Bobbin Threadbare, are you my mother?Registered Userregular
I'm going to have a contest.
The winner will receive a shiny copy of Metro 2033.
Here is what you have to do:
In a mini-review format (at least a good paragraph) I want you to tell me why your favorite game (or one of your favorites) is terrible. The review can be funny or serious; but your negativity has to be legitimate.
In order to qualify you have to both PM me your entry AND post it in this thread for all to see your humility about your favorite(ish) game If you don't do both, I could very likely miss your post and that would be sad.
However, I don't want to hear why a game you like that happens to already be terrible, is terrible. If you really enjoy Desert Bus, I don't care; that is cheating. The game has to be at least generally accepted as good.
In ONE HOUR from the posting of this post, I will choose a winner. It will be my favorite review and it will be completely subjective so don't complain.
EDIT: ADDENDUM: I will also accept entries that are reviews about one of your least favorite games and why it is great. Like before, all positivity has to be legitimate.
DiRT 2, from the demo, seems pretty awesome. The rewind mechanic isn't something I've seen in a racing game before. Honestly I was almost sold by the menus and nonexistent load times alone.
Almost. Unfortunately it doesn't seem like a game I want to be playing at 20 fps on low settings.
DiRT 2, from the demo, seems pretty awesome. The rewind mechanic isn't something I've seen in a racing game before. Honestly I was almost sold by the menus and nonexistent load times alone.
Almost. Unfortunately it doesn't seem like a game I want to be playing at 20 fps on low settings.
The game is awesome, trust me. The rewind mechanic is something that should be in every racing game EVER (at least on lower difficulties), and the menus are just amazing. Gameplay is awesome too
The only people who would play Uncharted: Drake's Fortune have to be idiots. I mean who wants a platforming game in a time of shoot-em ups. Why would you want to take cover behind objects when you can just crouch next to them/lie on the ground. And the treasures you're supposed to find are too damn hard without some kind of guidebook or cheat. But some actual complaints I had with this game were its hard to tell where to jump to (and sometimes the distance is ridiculous). In addition, when you're melee fighting sometimes you will lock on to something else. Next part is plot related:
Also screw those Nazi hybrid fast killing machines, they freaked the shit out of me the first time you encounter them (in the room with the movie reels, also I had no idea what to do during that time so I spent about 5 minutes running around in that room shooting them and punching them until I realized you're supposed to escape that room, by then I had no more ammo and my nerves were on a fray.
I'm going to have a contest.
The winner will receive a shiny copy of Metro 2033.
Here is what you have to do:
In a mini-review format (at least a good paragraph) I want you to tell me why your favorite game (or one of your favorites) is terrible. The review can be funny or serious; but your negativity has to be legitimate.
In order to qualify you have to both PM me your entry AND post it in this thread for all to see your humility about your favorite(ish) game If you don't do both, I could very likely miss your post and that would be sad.
However, I don't want to hear why a game you like that happens to already be terrible, is terrible. If you really enjoy Desert Bus, I don't care; that is cheating. The game has to be at least generally accepted as good.
In ONE HOUR from the posting of this post, I will choose a winner. It will be my favorite review and it will be completely subjective so don't complain.
EDIT: ADDENDUM: I will also accept entries that are reviews about one of your least favorite games and why it is great. Like before, all positivity has to be legitimate.
Portal: the review
This game is ridiculous. It could have had so much going for it. It had a strong female protaganist, amazing weaponry, and a stellar format, but it all went wrong. First, you hardly even get to see yourself. What's the point of making you a girl if you're never going to get to ogle your chest? Take some tips from Eidos or DoA, make it a feature of the series! Secondly, you get this incredible portal gun, but never get to use it on anyone. That's right, not a single person. Imagine the flesh-opening possibilities. But none of that here, obviously they couldn't get the tech working so took all of the nazis out. Finally, just when you're getting used to the brilliant structure of the missions, they go and change it all up with some unstructured exploring sections. If it ain't broke, don't fix it, I wanted 4000 rooms of white logic puzzles, none of this freeform crap.
OVerall, a missed opportunity, 2/10
TPSou on
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darunia106J-bob in gamesDeath MountainRegistered Userregular
I'm going to have a contest.
The winner will receive a shiny copy of Metro 2033.
Here is what you have to do:
In a mini-review format (at least a good paragraph) I want you to tell me why your favorite game (or one of your favorites) is terrible. The review can be funny or serious; but your negativity has to be legitimate.
In order to qualify you have to both PM me your entry AND post it in this thread for all to see your humility about your favorite(ish) game If you don't do both, I could very likely miss your post and that would be sad.
However, I don't want to hear why a game you like that happens to already be terrible, is terrible. If you really enjoy Desert Bus, I don't care; that is cheating. The game has to be at least generally accepted as good.
In ONE HOUR from the posting of this post, I will choose a winner. It will be my favorite review and it will be completely subjective so don't complain.
EDIT: ADDENDUM: I will also accept entries that are reviews about one of your least favorite games and why it is great. Like before, all positivity has to be legitimate.
This is quite tempting to do but I already won myself a copy of Just Cause 2 so I think I'll let someone else enter this one.
Even though I would love to post about all the negative aspects of my favorite game.
darunia106 on
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facetiousa wit so dryit shits sandRegistered Userregular
edited November 2010
Bought Dirt 2, thinking about the air pack, but leaning toward pass. I really am on a tight budget...
Random question: is there a way to make it so notifications about group events aren't popups? I always hate when I have Steam open while playing non-steam games and one of my group invites me to join an event and I'm pulled out of the game client to my desktop...
facetious on
"I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
I'm going to have a contest.
The winner will receive a shiny copy of Metro 2033.
Here is what you have to do:
In a mini-review format (at least a good paragraph) I want you to tell me why your favorite game (or one of your favorites) is terrible. The review can be funny or serious; but your negativity has to be legitimate.
In order to qualify you have to both PM me your entry AND post it in this thread for all to see your humility about your favorite(ish) game If you don't do both, I could very likely miss your post and that would be sad.
However, I don't want to hear why a game you like that happens to already be terrible, is terrible. If you really enjoy Desert Bus, I don't care; that is cheating. The game has to be at least generally accepted as good.
In ONE HOUR from the posting of this post, I will choose a winner. It will be my favorite review and it will be completely subjective so don't complain.
EDIT: ADDENDUM: I will also accept entries that are reviews about one of your least favorite games and why it is great. Like before, all positivity has to be legitimate.
My favorite game is probably Shadow of the Colossus. SotC is an awful game. It is as if Team Ico decided to rip off Zelda, but forgot to add in any color, storyline, or features. There's acrobatics, but with janky jump controls, combined with a sometimes infuriating camera, it's hard to tell if you're going to leap toward that ledge behind you or if you're going to gleefully plummet to your death by jumping sideways inexplicably. There's epic boss fights, but those are the only enemies you'll face in the entire game. There's swordplay, but literally the only move you can do that does any good in the entire game is a downward stab to peck away at said boss' sometimes obscenely gigantic health meters.
The scenery can be beautiful, but the second or third time you march your gigantic-ass horse through gray-brown canyon #4, I've had just about enough. Your average game developer solves this monotony problem by adding enemies to fight, or puzzles to solve, or something, but no. You get none of that here. Just a huge, empty, static backdrop, and covering all that ground can range from boring to irritating.
The odd beautiful vista you get now and then is marred by poor framerate. In fact, the entire game is marred by poor framerate. You think you can trick me by making everything blurry, Team Ico, but I can see through your smoke and mirrors.
Don't even get me started on the final boss, which is the most diabolically frustrating thing on the entire Earth. My first playthrough of the game stopped at the final boss, and I didn't pick up the game again for another 6 months. I am absolutely not kidding here.
I figure $10 is a good price for Metro 2033 even if I have to wait until my new computer is built to run it properly. Heck, by that time maybe I'll actually finish all of its estranged spiritual cousins, the S.T.A.L.K.E.R. games!
Super Metroid is one of the most unpolished games of all time. The game is so horribly broken there are glitches to reset the game. The game has many glaring flaws that have been touted as "features". These "features" include being able to skip most of the items in game, physics bugs, game breaking glitches and breaking the set path so bad it is barely recognizable. The game also has horribly lazy design and is designed around backtracking to find everything. To get all the items one would have to run through the game world in its entirety at least ten times, possible more if you made mistakes! How such a buggy, unorganized mess saw the light of day is beyond me! 7/10.
Half-Life 2 is hailed as one of the greatest games of all time. It has creative weapons, realistic physics, strong atmosphere and terrific characters. Or does it? You are Gordon Freeman, a misanthropic physicist with zero relatability. Like a young Harry Potter, the adoration of Freeman's peers does little to soften the fate that he must begrudgingly embrace. No matter the praise, no matter the heartfelt emotion, he is stoic and unresponsive. He monotonously goes through the warzone of earth as if it were a crossword puzzle on a long bus ride. No matter whether it is monsters, giant mechs, or beautiful women of questionable ethnicity his response is consistently boring. Many claim that Half-Life 2 is a terrific game, yet the game's focal scientist is less emotive than Stephen Hawking.
Drake you glorious git you! Just gifted me the Indie air pack, I didn't have any of those games at all so its gonna be so much fun! Hell of a surprise too. Had no idea anything was coming my way!
I'm going to have a contest.
The winner will receive a shiny copy of Metro 2033.
Here is what you have to do:
In a mini-review format (at least a good paragraph) I want you to tell me why your favorite game (or one of your favorites) is terrible. The review can be funny or serious; but your negativity has to be legitimate.
In order to qualify you have to both PM me your entry AND post it in this thread for all to see your humility about your favorite(ish) game If you don't do both, I could very likely miss your post and that would be sad.
However, I don't want to hear why a game you like that happens to already be terrible, is terrible. If you really enjoy Desert Bus, I don't care; that is cheating. The game has to be at least generally accepted as good.
In ONE HOUR from the posting of this post, I will choose a winner. It will be my favorite review and it will be completely subjective so don't complain.
EDIT: ADDENDUM: I will also accept entries that are reviews about one of your least favorite games and why it is great. Like before, all positivity has to be legitimate.
Welcome to the review. the game is the mario. mario has no guns. score 0/10 guns
game reviw by gun gamr bro88
TM (C)
edit: paragraphs are for the paraguay (ROFL)
SenorTacos on
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DietarySupplementStill not approved by the FDADublin, OHRegistered Userregular
edited November 2010
For TDWH's contest:
***
I want to talk to you about something serious for a minute. This isn't a sex talk; it isn't a "I'm breaking up with you talk" or a "you're adopted" talk. No, this is more serious. I'm going to talk about:
Angry Birds.
For those of you that have been living under a rock for the last four months, Angry Birds is a game about birds. It's been ported at this point to every mobile device in existence: iPhone, Android, iPad, DS, and Garmin GPS units. The birds? They are angry. Because pigs stole their eggs. It also has cute art and ripped off the Crush the Castle game play mechanic of launch objects at objects of various density and weight and resistance to destroy things obscured by said object. But instead of rocks, guess what? You use the birds themselves.
There are many birds to use in the game. Each bird has a "special" move that you can access by tapping the device's screen while they are in flight:
The Red Bird
Probably is a: Cardinal
Special Ability: Pure Hatred in the form of a ka-kaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwww
Why it sucks: It doesn't break anything easily and doesn't travel as well as the other birds; and is there only to make you wonder why it is there.
The Black Bird
Probably is a: Oriole
Special Ability: You can piss it off by tapping it and make it explode early.
Why it sucks: You only really get one on the harder stages
The Blue Bird
Probably is a: Blue Jay
Use: Shotgun some motherfucking pigs!
Special Ability: You touch the screen to make this idiot bird have instababies; it splits into three birds, all of which do crap damage.
Why it sucks: If you blow your bird wad too early, they lose to much momentum to do any damage; too late and you lose any good surface area to damage.
The Yellow Bird
Probably is a: Canary? I don't fucking care.
Special Ability: Turns said bird into a kamikaze while at the same time blows out your eardrums.
Why it sucks: Purely depends on your reflexes to touch the screen at the right time; also because it will sometimes break some surfaces and then the next time it won't. Fuck you, Canary.
The White Bird
Probably is a: Chicken
Special Ability: Can shit out an egg on command, which, somehow, does more damage than the exploding bird.
Why it sucks: Again with the reflex based special move in a game that is about trajectory. Imagine Scorch with this shit; it wouldn't work there, and it doesn't work here. Also once you use the crazy egg-shit ability your bird gains height and ruins your trajectory. Fuck off, white bird.
Also they are somehow making this game into a movie and it isn't being directed by this guy.
Half-Life 2 is hailed as one of the greatest games of all time. It has creative weapons, realistic physics, strong atmosphere and terrific characters. Or does it? You are Gordon Freeman, a misanthropic physicist with zero relatability. Like a young Harry Potter, the adoration of your peers does little to soften the fate that you must begrudgingly embrace. No matter the praise, no matter the heartfelt emotion, he is stoic and unresponsive. He monotonously goes through the warzone of earth as if it were a crossword puzzle on a long bus ride. No matter whether it is monsters, giant mechs, or beautiful women of questionable ethnicity his response is consistently boring. Many claim that Half-Life 2 is a terrific game, yet the game's focal scientist is less emotive than Stephen Hawking.
I agree. Half Life 2 would have been twice as good if they had made Gordon a sassy black guy, and given him extensive voice acting.
"Daaaaaaaamn son! Sand lions and shit!"
"OH SNAP THAT DUDE JUST GOT ATE."
Centipeed on
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CheesecakeRecipe"Should not be allowed to post in the Steam Thread" - IsornSqualor Victoria, Squalor Victoria!Registered Userregular
I'm going to have a contest.
The winner will receive a shiny copy of Metro 2033.
Here is what you have to do:
In a mini-review format (at least a good paragraph) I want you to tell me why your favorite game (or one of your favorites) is terrible. The review can be funny or serious; but your negativity has to be legitimate.
In order to qualify you have to both PM me your entry AND post it in this thread for all to see your humility about your favorite(ish) game If you don't do both, I could very likely miss your post and that would be sad.
However, I don't want to hear why a game you like that happens to already be terrible, is terrible. If you really enjoy Desert Bus, I don't care; that is cheating. The game has to be at least generally accepted as good.
In ONE HOUR from the posting of this post, I will choose a winner. It will be my favorite review and it will be completely subjective so don't complain.
EDIT: ADDENDUM: I will also accept entries that are reviews about one of your least favorite games and why it is great. Like before, all positivity has to be legitimate.
Phantasy Star Online tends to be given a lot of credit for being one of the best lootfests of all time but let me tell you, that game needs to get blown up by dark falz and sent floating into space never to be seen again. Ever since I first stepped foot into those 4 fucking areas way back on dreamcast and then later the gamecube, it has ruined almost every other RPG for me. Hundreds upon hundreds of unique weapons and armors, powered my lust enough to grind for thousands of hours over 3 iterations of the game (Dreamcast V.1, Gamecube, Blue Burst) and for what? A fucking laser rifle shaped like a frilly flower? A sword made of the DNA of one of the boss creatures? Another goddamn Varista?
Hours and hours of boring combat (1, 2, 3 long pause, 1, 2, 3 long pause, rinse repeat. Your whole time in middle school? Yeah, I did that much of it.) in areas with enemies that were just reskins of the previous areas creatures. And yet, that loot. I needed all of it. Every. Single. Piece. Some missions required you to have AI partners, and goddamn they were so horrible at combat. If someone so much as murmurs the world MOME I want to snap a neck. Possibly even mine. And yet, I did it all in the name of that fat loot, and it has ruined all other RPGs for me because no game has given me enough unique looking and performing loot to trudge through. Hell, I even grinded Too Human for several hundred hours trying to make it PSO: Action Sequel.
Fuck PSO, ruining my gaming experience forever.
CheesecakeRecipe on
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GuibsWeekend WarriorSomewhere up North.Registered Userregular
I'm going to have a contest.
The winner will receive a shiny copy of Metro 2033.
Here is what you have to do:
In a mini-review format (at least a good paragraph) I want you to tell me why your favorite game (or one of your favorites) is terrible. The review can be funny or serious; but your negativity has to be legitimate.
In order to qualify you have to both PM me your entry AND post it in this thread for all to see your humility about your favorite(ish) game If you don't do both, I could very likely miss your post and that would be sad.
However, I don't want to hear why a game you like that happens to already be terrible, is terrible. If you really enjoy Desert Bus, I don't care; that is cheating. The game has to be at least generally accepted as good.
In ONE HOUR from the posting of this post, I will choose a winner. It will be my favorite review and it will be completely subjective so don't complain.
EDIT: ADDENDUM: I will also accept entries that are reviews about one of your least favorite games and why it is great. Like before, all positivity has to be legitimate.
Welcome to the review. the game is the mario. mario has no guns. score 0/10 guns
game reviw by gun gamr bro88
TM (C)
Not sure you are going to like Metro 2033 after all...
Half-Life 2 is hailed as one of the greatest games of all time. It has creative weapons, realistic physics, strong atmosphere and terrific characters. Or does it? You are Gordon Freeman, a misanthropic physicist with zero relatability. Like a young Harry Potter, the adoration of your peers does little to soften the fate that you must begrudgingly embrace. No matter the praise, no matter the heartfelt emotion, he is stoic and unresponsive. He monotonously goes through the warzone of earth as if it were a crossword puzzle on a long bus ride. No matter whether it is monsters, giant mechs, or beautiful women of questionable ethnicity his response is consistently boring. Many claim that Half-Life 2 is a terrific game, yet the game's focal scientist is less emotive than Stephen Hawking.
I agree. Half Life 2 would have been twice as good if they had made Gordon a sassy black guy, and given him extensive voice acting.
"Daaaaaaaamn son! Sand lions and shit!"
"OH SNAP THAT DUDE JUST GOT ATE."
I want to talk to you about something serious for a minute. This isn't a sex talk; it isn't a "I'm breaking up with you talk" or a "you're adopted" talk. No, this is more serious. I'm going to talk about:
Angry Birds.
For those of you that have been living under a rock for the last four months, Angry Birds is a game about birds. It's been ported at this point to every mobile device in existence: iPhone, Android, iPad, DS, and Garmin GPS units. The birds? They are angry. Because pigs stole their eggs. It also has cute art and ripped off the Crush the Castle game play mechanic of launch objects at objects of various density and weight and resistance to destroy things obscured by said object. But instead of rocks, guess what? You use the birds themselves.
There are many birds to use in the game. Each bird has a "special" move that you can access by tapping the device's screen while they are in flight:
The Red Bird
Probably is a: Cardinal
Special Ability: Pure Hatred in the form of a ka-kaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwww
Why it sucks: It doesn't break anything easily and doesn't travel as well as the other birds; and is there only to make you wonder why it is there.
The Black Bird
Probably is a: Oriole
Special Ability: You can piss it off by tapping it and make it explode early.
Why it sucks: You only really get one on the harder stages
The Blue Bird
Probably is a: Blue Jay
Use: Shotgun some motherfucking pigs!
Special Ability: You touch the screen to make this idiot bird have instababies; it splits into three birds, all of which do crap damage.
Why it sucks: If you blow your bird wad too early, they lose to much momentum to do any damage; too late and you lose any good surface area to damage.
The Yellow Bird
Probably is a: Canary? I don't fucking care.
Special Ability: Turns said bird into a kamikaze while at the same time blows out your eardrums.
Why it sucks: Purely depends on your reflexes to touch the screen at the right time; also because it will sometimes break some surfaces and then the next time it won't. Fuck you, Canary.
The White Bird
Probably is a: Chicken
Special Ability: Can shit out an egg on command, which, somehow, does more damage than the exploding bird.
Why it sucks: Again with the reflex based special move in a game that is about trajectory. Imagine Scorch with this shit; it wouldn't work there, and it doesn't work here. Also once you use the crazy egg-shit ability your bird gains height and ruins your trajectory. Fuck off, white bird.
Also they are somehow making this game into a movie and it isn't being directed by this guy.
That's hilarious!!!!!
Should have been made into a movie by this guy if he wasn't 6 feet under @_@
Half-Life 2 is hailed as one of the greatest games of all time. It has creative weapons, realistic physics, strong atmosphere and terrific characters. Or does it? You are Gordon Freeman, a misanthropic physicist with zero relatability. Like a young Harry Potter, the adoration of your peers does little to soften the fate that you must begrudgingly embrace. No matter the praise, no matter the heartfelt emotion, he is stoic and unresponsive. He monotonously goes through the warzone of earth as if it were a crossword puzzle on a long bus ride. No matter whether it is monsters, giant mechs, or beautiful women of questionable ethnicity his response is consistently boring. Many claim that Half-Life 2 is a terrific game, yet the game's focal scientist is less emotive than Stephen Hawking.
I agree. Half Life 2 would have been twice as good if they had made Gordon a sassy black guy, and given him extensive voice acting.
"Daaaaaaaamn son! Sand lions and shit!"
"OH SNAP THAT DUDE JUST GOT ATE."
*Gordon shoots a buzzsaw through a zombie and notices another zombie*
"You best check yo'self before I bisect yo'self!"
*Gordon meets Alyx and her robot*
"Wassup, Dog?"
*Barney tries to remember which crowbar belongs to Gordon*
"It's the one that says 'Bad Motherfucker' on it!"
TychoCelchuuu on
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Sir CarcassI have been shown the end of my worldRound Rock, TXRegistered Userregular
I'm going to have a contest.
The winner will receive a shiny copy of Metro 2033.
Here is what you have to do:
In a mini-review format (at least a good paragraph) I want you to tell me why your favorite game (or one of your favorites) is terrible. The review can be funny or serious; but your negativity has to be legitimate.
In order to qualify you have to both PM me your entry AND post it in this thread for all to see your humility about your favorite(ish) game If you don't do both, I could very likely miss your post and that would be sad.
However, I don't want to hear why a game you like that happens to already be terrible, is terrible. If you really enjoy Desert Bus, I don't care; that is cheating. The game has to be at least generally accepted as good.
In ONE HOUR from the posting of this post, I will choose a winner. It will be my favorite review and it will be completely subjective so don't complain.
EDIT: ADDENDUM: I will also accept entries that are reviews about one of your least favorite games and why it is great. Like before, all positivity has to be legitimate.
Dragon Age
Seriously, what the hell is up with this. You have great gameplay, a decent story, loads of skills to play with and...it's all ruined by the fact you have to constantly save and reload in case you piss off one of your party too much and have to kill them. The worst part is, when it happens you think "thank god that bitch is dead, now i don't have to put up with her anymore" then you realize annoying character X fills an integral part of your party and can't be replaced by anyone else, so it's f9, quickload, and cater to her every whim for the rest of the game. W T F Bioware. Way to ruin an entire game by forcing the player to be a goody two shoes to appease their care bear overlords.
Dragon Age? More like happy sing along camping trip age.
Also, wtf is up with making shale so much better than all the other tank options but giving her the worst VA i've ever had the misfortune of hearing in my life? forcing me to replace her with yet another care bear party member.
I miss the good old days of KOTOR when your party members were awesome and only needed to be killed on occasion. They're supposed to be interesting, not catholic priests every single one.
Graphics 7/10
Story 9/10
Gameplay 9/10
Characters -5/10
Total (Not an average) 5.5/10
Posts
Thanks for everyone who participated, but I'm out!
Thanks so much for spreading the Christmas cheer!
Winner! Added you on steam.
And I'm all gifted out, lets do it again in a few days for the xmas sale!
Anyone making a group to get TRINE or/and Lead and Gold? Those are the only games I would really like from today's sale, so I would definitely like in on that!
Thank you for Trine!
PSN Hypacia
Xbox HypaciaMinnow
Discord Hypacia#0391
Xbox Live - Draysoth1
PSN - Draysoth
Steam - Draysoth
3DS - 2320-6133-3744
Please let me know if you add me!
Edit: deadline is the end of this thread.
Congratulations!
I don't think I need any more racing sims.
The winner will receive a shiny copy of Metro 2033.
Here is what you have to do:
In a mini-review format (at least a good paragraph) I want you to tell me why your favorite game (or one of your favorites) is terrible. The review can be funny or serious; but your negativity has to be legitimate.
In order to qualify you have to both PM me your entry AND post it in this thread for all to see your humility about your favorite(ish) game If you don't do both, I could very likely miss your post and that would be sad.
However, I don't want to hear why a game you like that happens to already be terrible, is terrible. If you really enjoy Desert Bus, I don't care; that is cheating. The game has to be at least generally accepted as good.
In ONE HOUR from the posting of this post, I will choose a winner. It will be my favorite review and it will be completely subjective so don't complain.
EDIT: ADDENDUM: I will also accept entries that are reviews about one of your least favorite games and why it is great. Like before, all positivity has to be legitimate.
Origin: Galedrid - Nintendo: Galedrid/3222-6858-1045
Blizzard: Galedrid#1367 - FFXIV: Galedrid Kingshand
Maddoc!!!! Thank you for Trine!! I totally didn't expect that! Really really cool of you dude
Almost. Unfortunately it doesn't seem like a game I want to be playing at 20 fps on low settings.
Steam - Wildschwein | The Backlog
Grappling Hook Showdown - Tumblr
The game is awesome, trust me. The rewind mechanic is something that should be in every racing game EVER (at least on lower difficulties), and the menus are just amazing. Gameplay is awesome too
Xfire: lordgravewish
Steam: LordGravewish
Portal: the review
This game is ridiculous. It could have had so much going for it. It had a strong female protaganist, amazing weaponry, and a stellar format, but it all went wrong. First, you hardly even get to see yourself. What's the point of making you a girl if you're never going to get to ogle your chest? Take some tips from Eidos or DoA, make it a feature of the series! Secondly, you get this incredible portal gun, but never get to use it on anyone. That's right, not a single person. Imagine the flesh-opening possibilities. But none of that here, obviously they couldn't get the tech working so took all of the nazis out. Finally, just when you're getting used to the brilliant structure of the missions, they go and change it all up with some unstructured exploring sections. If it ain't broke, don't fix it, I wanted 4000 rooms of white logic puzzles, none of this freeform crap.
OVerall, a missed opportunity, 2/10
This is quite tempting to do but I already won myself a copy of Just Cause 2 so I think I'll let someone else enter this one.
Even though I would love to post about all the negative aspects of my favorite game.
Random question: is there a way to make it so notifications about group events aren't popups? I always hate when I have Steam open while playing non-steam games and one of my group invites me to join an event and I'm pulled out of the game client to my desktop...
Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
Dyvim Tvar is a king of kings
PSN ID : DetectiveOlivaw | TWITTER | STEAM ID | NEVER FORGET
My favorite game is probably Shadow of the Colossus. SotC is an awful game. It is as if Team Ico decided to rip off Zelda, but forgot to add in any color, storyline, or features. There's acrobatics, but with janky jump controls, combined with a sometimes infuriating camera, it's hard to tell if you're going to leap toward that ledge behind you or if you're going to gleefully plummet to your death by jumping sideways inexplicably. There's epic boss fights, but those are the only enemies you'll face in the entire game. There's swordplay, but literally the only move you can do that does any good in the entire game is a downward stab to peck away at said boss' sometimes obscenely gigantic health meters.
The scenery can be beautiful, but the second or third time you march your gigantic-ass horse through gray-brown canyon #4, I've had just about enough. Your average game developer solves this monotony problem by adding enemies to fight, or puzzles to solve, or something, but no. You get none of that here. Just a huge, empty, static backdrop, and covering all that ground can range from boring to irritating.
The odd beautiful vista you get now and then is marred by poor framerate. In fact, the entire game is marred by poor framerate. You think you can trick me by making everything blurry, Team Ico, but I can see through your smoke and mirrors.
Don't even get me started on the final boss, which is the most diabolically frustrating thing on the entire Earth. My first playthrough of the game stopped at the final boss, and I didn't pick up the game again for another 6 months. I am absolutely not kidding here.
Handmade Jewelry by me on EtsyGames for sale
Me on Twitch!
@ The Dude With Herpes
Half-Life 2 is hailed as one of the greatest games of all time. It has creative weapons, realistic physics, strong atmosphere and terrific characters. Or does it? You are Gordon Freeman, a misanthropic physicist with zero relatability. Like a young Harry Potter, the adoration of Freeman's peers does little to soften the fate that he must begrudgingly embrace. No matter the praise, no matter the heartfelt emotion, he is stoic and unresponsive. He monotonously goes through the warzone of earth as if it were a crossword puzzle on a long bus ride. No matter whether it is monsters, giant mechs, or beautiful women of questionable ethnicity his response is consistently boring. Many claim that Half-Life 2 is a terrific game, yet the game's focal scientist is less emotive than Stephen Hawking.
Dude, your signature just made me crack up >.<;
Welcome to the review. the game is the mario. mario has no guns. score 0/10 guns
game reviw by gun gamr bro88
edit: paragraphs are for the paraguay (ROFL)
***
I want to talk to you about something serious for a minute. This isn't a sex talk; it isn't a "I'm breaking up with you talk" or a "you're adopted" talk. No, this is more serious. I'm going to talk about:
Angry Birds.
For those of you that have been living under a rock for the last four months, Angry Birds is a game about birds. It's been ported at this point to every mobile device in existence: iPhone, Android, iPad, DS, and Garmin GPS units. The birds? They are angry. Because pigs stole their eggs. It also has cute art and ripped off the Crush the Castle game play mechanic of launch objects at objects of various density and weight and resistance to destroy things obscured by said object. But instead of rocks, guess what? You use the birds themselves.
There are many birds to use in the game. Each bird has a "special" move that you can access by tapping the device's screen while they are in flight:
The Red Bird
Probably is a: Cardinal
Special Ability: Pure Hatred in the form of a ka-kaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwww
Why it sucks: It doesn't break anything easily and doesn't travel as well as the other birds; and is there only to make you wonder why it is there.
The Black Bird
Probably is a: Oriole
Special Ability: You can piss it off by tapping it and make it explode early.
Why it sucks: You only really get one on the harder stages
The Blue Bird
Probably is a: Blue Jay
Use: Shotgun some motherfucking pigs!
Special Ability: You touch the screen to make this idiot bird have instababies; it splits into three birds, all of which do crap damage.
Why it sucks: If you blow your bird wad too early, they lose to much momentum to do any damage; too late and you lose any good surface area to damage.
The Yellow Bird
Probably is a: Canary? I don't fucking care.
Special Ability: Turns said bird into a kamikaze while at the same time blows out your eardrums.
Why it sucks: Purely depends on your reflexes to touch the screen at the right time; also because it will sometimes break some surfaces and then the next time it won't. Fuck you, Canary.
The White Bird
Probably is a: Chicken
Special Ability: Can shit out an egg on command, which, somehow, does more damage than the exploding bird.
Why it sucks: Again with the reflex based special move in a game that is about trajectory. Imagine Scorch with this shit; it wouldn't work there, and it doesn't work here. Also once you use the crazy egg-shit ability your bird gains height and ruins your trajectory. Fuck off, white bird.
Also they are somehow making this game into a movie and it isn't being directed by this guy.
For £1.75 I am physically unable to resist chucking it in the basket on vague reputation alone.
lolwut?
I agree. Half Life 2 would have been twice as good if they had made Gordon a sassy black guy, and given him extensive voice acting.
"Daaaaaaaamn son! Sand lions and shit!"
"OH SNAP THAT DUDE JUST GOT ATE."
Phantasy Star Online tends to be given a lot of credit for being one of the best lootfests of all time but let me tell you, that game needs to get blown up by dark falz and sent floating into space never to be seen again. Ever since I first stepped foot into those 4 fucking areas way back on dreamcast and then later the gamecube, it has ruined almost every other RPG for me. Hundreds upon hundreds of unique weapons and armors, powered my lust enough to grind for thousands of hours over 3 iterations of the game (Dreamcast V.1, Gamecube, Blue Burst) and for what? A fucking laser rifle shaped like a frilly flower? A sword made of the DNA of one of the boss creatures? Another goddamn Varista?
Hours and hours of boring combat (1, 2, 3 long pause, 1, 2, 3 long pause, rinse repeat. Your whole time in middle school? Yeah, I did that much of it.) in areas with enemies that were just reskins of the previous areas creatures. And yet, that loot. I needed all of it. Every. Single. Piece. Some missions required you to have AI partners, and goddamn they were so horrible at combat. If someone so much as murmurs the world MOME I want to snap a neck. Possibly even mine. And yet, I did it all in the name of that fat loot, and it has ruined all other RPGs for me because no game has given me enough unique looking and performing loot to trudge through. Hell, I even grinded Too Human for several hundred hours trying to make it PSO: Action Sequel.
Fuck PSO, ruining my gaming experience forever.
Not sure you are going to like Metro 2033 after all...
PSN: Guibs25 | XboxLive: Guibs | Steam: Guibsx | Twitch: Guibsx
Xfire: lordgravewish
Steam: LordGravewish
indubitably
That's hilarious!!!!!
Should have been made into a movie by this guy if he wasn't 6 feet under @_@
*Gordon shoots a buzzsaw through a zombie and notices another zombie*
"You best check yo'self before I bisect yo'self!"
*Gordon meets Alyx and her robot*
"Wassup, Dog?"
*Barney tries to remember which crowbar belongs to Gordon*
"It's the one that says 'Bad Motherfucker' on it!"
Dragon Age
Seriously, what the hell is up with this. You have great gameplay, a decent story, loads of skills to play with and...it's all ruined by the fact you have to constantly save and reload in case you piss off one of your party too much and have to kill them. The worst part is, when it happens you think "thank god that bitch is dead, now i don't have to put up with her anymore" then you realize annoying character X fills an integral part of your party and can't be replaced by anyone else, so it's f9, quickload, and cater to her every whim for the rest of the game. W T F Bioware. Way to ruin an entire game by forcing the player to be a goody two shoes to appease their care bear overlords.
Dragon Age? More like happy sing along camping trip age.
Also, wtf is up with making shale so much better than all the other tank options but giving her the worst VA i've ever had the misfortune of hearing in my life? forcing me to replace her with yet another care bear party member.
I miss the good old days of KOTOR when your party members were awesome and only needed to be killed on occasion. They're supposed to be interesting, not catholic priests every single one.
Graphics 7/10
Story 9/10
Gameplay 9/10
Characters -5/10
Total (Not an average) 5.5/10