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The enemy gate is destroyed!

FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
edited April 2011 in Social Entropy++
Now is the time for brave hearts and brave deeds!

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Possibly the best strategy game ever made, errybody loves Medieval II: Total War and it's expansion. Everyone. It's like $10 on steam right now, get it.

I've been playing as Venice. I'm gonna try to actually beat the game and then maybe play as the Danes or the Sicilians. I'm pounding my way against the HRE, Milan (I took Milan and Genoa, they're stuck in two shitty french castles), Hungary, and the Byzantine empire. I'm winning right now thanks to Venetian Heavy Infantry and Dismounted Feudal Knights. I'm also making like 6000 florins a turn because holy crap Venice is in a position to make stacks with enough merchants/merchants guilds.

I hear there are some good mods too

I wanna play the LOTR mod

Who else loves this goddamn game so much

Fandyien on
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Posts

  • Macro9Macro9 Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Shogun 2 is going to kick so much ass.

    Can't wait for it.

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  • WietWiet Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    I am making the Byzantines my bitch with good infantry

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  • KlykaKlyka DO you have any SPARE BATTERIES?Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    The Lord of the Rings mod for this is soooooooooooooooooooooooooo amazing.

    SC2 EU ID Klyka.110
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  • MrMonroeMrMonroe Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    this game would be way more enjoyable if it weren't for that god damned pope

  • ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    MrMonroe wrote: »
    this game would be way more enjoyable if it weren't for that god damned pope

    Fucker just ruins everything.

    League of Legends: Lamby Cakes | XBox Live: Jon Butters
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    stack the college of cardinals with your own and assasinate the ones you don't like

    also kill popes you don't like

    lots of assassins

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  • L|amaL|ama Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    beat and then play as an islamic state, bringing the word of allah to the heathen whiteys

  • WietWiet Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Giving the Papal States money usually improves their relation with you enough for you to do whatever you want.

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  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    I love Medieval 2

    Love it sooooooo bad

  • Josiah_9Josiah_9 Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Macro9 wrote: »
    Shogun 2 is going to kick so much ass.

    Can't wait for it.

    I will buy it on day one, and be pissed how buggy it is. Then play the shit out of it.

  • HobnailHobnail Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    I have played hundreds of hours of this game and never once actually beaten a long campaign. Never even made it to the New World.

  • MrMonroeMrMonroe Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Fandyien wrote: »
    stack the college of cardinals with your own and assasinate the ones you don't like

    also kill popes you don't like

    lots of assassins

    oh trust me

    I'm with Stalin on this one

    death solves all problems; no pope, no problem

  • WietWiet Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    I'm the same. I can't complete a campaign because the challenge is just sucked away after a while.

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  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Short campaigns are more fun in a way

    You can just blast through them with a definitive objective

  • M.D.M.D. and then what happens? Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    im so terrible at this game, although I really enjoyed it.

  • WietWiet Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    I've never actually tried a short campaign. I usually end up blitzing a bunch of cities at once, so I don't know how much mileage I'd get out of one.

    I've always been more partial to Rome: Total War anyway. I'm a huge Rome fanboy and the Barbarian Invasion expansion with the Western Empire was just the right amount of challenge for me.

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  • MrMonroeMrMonroe Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Long games are always annoying after a while in every total war game. You'd be surprised how many games of Rome I've bailed on because fuck bothering with conquering northern Europe

    it's a shithole!


    wait, maybe you wouldn't be surprised

  • L|amaL|ama Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    yeah I always make plans to conquer the entirety of the world as egypt or something then realise about a third of the way through that I can do it easily and get bored of it

  • HobnailHobnail Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Russia is an interminable shithole and unless you're the Byzantines or an Islamic state, so is Outremer

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Hobnail wrote: »
    Russia is an interminable shithole and unless you're the Byzantines or an Islamic state, so is Outremer

    I like playing as the Byzantines

    It has a nice Rome: Total War feel in a way

    You know, the Middle East, the Greeks and Persians (OK, Islamic states but whatever)

  • jotjot Registered User
    edited January 2011
    I just started playing this!
    I am hopelessly lost and have no idea whatsoever what I'm doing.
    And the tutorial didn't help at all, it was just like "here are some menus which will confuse the fuck out of you, now go attack that city!"

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Just build peasant units

    and hurl them at your enemies

    You can't lose

  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Nothing beats being the first son of a bitch to develop gun powder units in this game.

    Oh how quaint...you have armored swordsmen and pikemen. Look at that, some archers...aren't you a big boy. BAM! SUCK CANNON BALLS BITCHES!

  • jotjot Registered User
    edited January 2011
    Solar wrote: »
    Just build peasant units

    and hurl them at your enemies

    You can't lose

    but Solar I'm not playing as Russia

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    You say that, but when they first come along they are shite

    You're better off with archers throughout most of the game (well, if you are playing as England anyway)

    Also Jot it's that mindset which will lose you this game

    Remember

    The peasants are only there to hold up your glorious empire. Sacrifice them to your mighty will!

  • NotASenatorNotASenator Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    This game is okay, I guess.

  • HobnailHobnail Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    The biggest dick move is to start as the Moors, rush Caravan Depots and flood Europe with camel gunners. Those guys with a bunch of experience are murder machines and dirty turnip pullin' Euros do not know what the fuck

  • ArangArang Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    I'm not too keen on doing the battle-map stuff, which wasn't such a big problem until I tried to conquer the Holy Land, which turned out to be chock full of Mongols. It turns out it's really, really hard to beat 10-star generals without any generals of your own, which means you won't get any more generals. 80 years and 30000 men later, I finally crushed the fuckers and then the Timurids showed up.

    I cried.

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  • TarranonTarranon Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    this game annoyed me so much

    despite trying to carefully breed my family to be cool people, i just got increasingly terrible pieces of shit

  • HobnailHobnail Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    You just have to make them actually do things. Even lots of small pissant victories will boost a general's traits and huge arse-fucking defensive victories where you lose 150 goons to the attacker's 2600 will make a hard dude out of the most useless of pussies.

  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    If you get a really shitty royal in your family, it's often better to move him out solo into the ocean and wait for a random pirate vessel to come over and fuck his day up. Sometimes you just have to prune the family tree.

  • BerkBerk Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    no this is the best strategy game ever made

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  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Arang wrote: »
    I'm not too keen on doing the battle-map stuff, which wasn't such a big problem until I tried to conquer the Holy Land, which turned out to be chock full of Mongols. It turns out it's really, really hard to beat 10-star generals without any generals of your own, which means you won't get any more generals. 80 years and 30000 men later, I finally crushed the fuckers and then the Timurids showed up.

    I cried.

    I loved shit like this

    Where I had to bleed sweat and tears for every provicne I took, where those of my men who survived were formed into elite units of savage bastards, where my generals were hardened, tough men who knew who to keep the local population in line.

    The parts of the game where you are throwing everything into a war desperate to win, fighting every battle personally to squeeze as many surviving men out as you can, those are the best parts.

  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
  • WietWiet Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Solar wrote: »
    Arang wrote: »
    I'm not too keen on doing the battle-map stuff, which wasn't such a big problem until I tried to conquer the Holy Land, which turned out to be chock full of Mongols. It turns out it's really, really hard to beat 10-star generals without any generals of your own, which means you won't get any more generals. 80 years and 30000 men later, I finally crushed the fuckers and then the Timurids showed up.

    I cried.

    I loved shit like this

    Where I had to bleed sweat and tears for every provicne I took, where those of my men who survived were formed into elite units of savage bastards, where my generals were hardened, tough men who knew who to keep the local population in line.

    The parts of the game where you are throwing everything into a war desperate to win, fighting every battle personally to squeeze as many surviving men out as you can, those are the best parts.

    This is exactly why I loved playing as the WRE in Barbarian Invasion. You basically get a crumbling empire thrown in your lap along with a countdown: get your shit together before the hordes arrive or die.

    I've once beaten the crap out of the vandals with one half stack army filled with Palatine Guard, led by my ''best'' 3-star general. Four stacks of horse archers against that tiny army. If it wasn't for the bridge I was camping on I would've lost my campaign, but even with the bridge it was a hell of a tough fight. They'd pelt me with arrows before charging through, killing half the dudes around. Eventually they'd charge over and give the Guard a ton of experience. I believe all of the units were decimated but with atleast triple silver chevrons at the end of it. The general went from 3 stars to 8, along with a bunch of other combat related traits that made him a godlike figure.

    And then he rebelled.

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  • SnowbeatSnowbeat i need something to kick this thing's ass over the lineRegistered User regular
    edited January 2011
    no, the enemy gate is down

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  • NotASenatorNotASenator Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    Snowbeat wrote: »
    no, the enemy gate is down

    Salaam, Snowbeat.

  • MetroidZoidMetroidZoid Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    This seems like a game I need to play.

    Worst case scenario I lose a few hours of time and $10.

    9UsHUfk.jpgSteam
    3DS FC: 4699-5714-8940 Playing Pokemon, add me! Ho, SATAN!
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited January 2011
    It's so fun. When you start forming an army of guys that survive one campaign after another, and are just hardened bitter bastards with nothing but bloodlust, it's so awesome.

    Then you throw your weak pawn troops at the enemy, specifically trying to knock out their archers or siege weapons. When they feel all good about themselves, then you bring your Immortals in to rape their soul.

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