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Tales from the Public Restroom

TrillianTrillian Registered User regular
edited February 2011 in Social Entropy++
We've all been there.
You're out and about have to "use the facilities" really badly so you dive into the nearest bathroom you can find. What you may find in there, however is always a surprise. It seems not everyone uses those facilities the same way, or indeed for the same purpose.

Today I was in the ladies bathroom at Sears in downtown Vancouver and both of the stalls were occupied. A stall door opened, without the usual preceeding toilet flush, and a really tall girl wearing tights and heels walked out.

I go to enter said stall, and notice that the toilet was clean, and the seat had not been peed on (this is a Big Deal in this town because 9 times out of 10 in this town someone's pissed on the seat).
I look at the floor and oh shit. She's peed on it. There's a big ole puddle right in the middle of the stall.
Fucking. Great.

I wait for the next stall, and lo and behold, the old lady who was in there before me had let loose her bladder all over the fucking seat.

I give up, and resign myself to standing cross-legged on the escalator to use the bathroom on the upper level. No, I did not pee on the seat or on the floor.

So tell me, SE++, what sort of horrors has a bathroom wreaked upon your life.

Trillian on

They cast a shadow like a sundial in the morning light. It was half past 10.
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Posts

  • SnowbeatSnowbeat i need something to kick this thing's ass over the lineRegistered User regular
    edited February 2011
    i went into the women's restroom this one time and peed all over the floor and then went into the next stall to pee on the seat

    Q1e6oi8.gif
  • DaricDaric Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    One of my friends at work tells me all kinds of funny stories about what happens in the ladies room at my job.

    One time she told me she was checking her hair in the mirror when a woman came up and stood next to her and just said

    "Some guy walked by me and said EW"

    cc61181c22f23454a304a4f1f0867845044.gif
  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I'm using this thread as one right now!

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I once walked up to the entrance to the men's room at a large train station, there was a dude covered in blood, blood all over the walls and police standing around.
    I held it until I got home instead.

    A co-worker of my brother from years back found $20,000 in a hand bag and kept it. No one is going to claim (presumably a drug drop) that if you turn it in to the police lady, and you get it after a few months.

    I also have walked into a men's room to find blood on every stall seat. I held my poop in instead.

  • OlivawOlivaw good name, isn't it? peach treesRegistered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I've been to American and Canadian bathrooms

    And I have to say, the Canadian ones? Generally cleaner!

    Hell even their fast food bathrooms are cleaner

    It's mind boggling shit

    7u0YG.gif
    PSN ID : DetectiveOlivaw | TWITTER | SCREENED | STEAM ID | BUY SOME STUFF!
  • FalxFalx Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    The best is the toilets at the gym. Protein supplements have such a ... distinctive... odor.

    Hisao? What's the word for when it feels in your heart that everything in the world is alright?
    .

    STEAM
  • I Win SwordfightsI Win Swordfights fuck tough be coolRegistered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I made a janitor quit in elementary school

    FoV2xYF.png
  • chrishallett83chrishallett83 Hi! Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Having to clean the toilets in a fast-food restaurant is the worst.

    So I don't do it.

    Fuck that, send one of the useless slow people to do it, I'm busy trying to keep a couple hundred people per hour happy.

    terriblepostsigpic.jpg
    AusPAX tickets get [X] Accomodation get [X] Plane tickets get [ ] Goodie giftbags made [ ]
  • stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I basically never used the bathroom at my highschool. It was disgusting. It did help that I lived 5 minutes walk away and would just go home for lunch anyway.
    I've been told the female bathrooms there were worse.

  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I made a janitor quit in elementary school

    wanna hear this story

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • I Win SwordfightsI Win Swordfights fuck tough be coolRegistered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I'd tell you to search for it but you can't. I will tell it when I wake up.

    FoV2xYF.png
  • stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Once at a cafe I briefly worked at some guy came in got a large coffee and used our bathroom. It was a take away coffee and he was in there a long time before coming to pick it up.

    He had pooped, then smeared it on the walls and left it in the toilet. I was not the one that cleaned that, however I'm sure the person who did is grateful they didn't leave it on the floor.

  • Stabbing SmokeStabbing Smoke Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I work at a University, so my work restrooms are used by a variety of people.
    The strangest thing I've seen is the shrine incident.

    Monday through Thursday, some time between 1 and 5 PM, some one would go into the same stall and use the restroom.
    After they were done, they'd lift the seat and cover the thing in toilet paper. Never flush.

    Now, when I say cover, I mean they'd turn the damn thing into an artistic homage to their excrement.

    Sometimes it would be streamers starting from the center and flowing around the bowl.

    Sometimes paper would cascade from the top of the toilet lid and into the water, then out again - like a waterfall.

    Once paper was laid criss-cross across bowl opening like a basket weave.


    This went on for about a month. I never figured out who it was.

    sigqq.png
  • Raiden333Raiden333 Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I work in an office building that really isn't that big. We've got the office I work at, which has about 12 guys. Ours is the biggest in the building. Then there's also like 6 other smaller offices, each with like 2-5 employees. There's one public restroom, openable only with a key (okay, well, not exactly public, but shared by all the offices), shared by only about 15-20 guys total and cleaned spotlessly every night it seems.

    I haven't been able to figure out who, but apparently one of the dudes is the incredible hulk when it comes to shitting. Twice has damage happened to The Coveted Handicrapper Stall. Once, the sliding lock-bar was snapped completely in half. I'm imagining some poor dude playing angry birds on his iphone while he drops the kids off at the pool and suddenly HulkShitter bursts in like a police raid.

    Secondly, and I don't even know how this happened, half the toilet seat was broken off. The weird part was nobody ever found where the part broken off ended up.

    camo_sig2.png
  • Triple BTriple B Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I want to re-read the story someone posted a couple years ago about his dad taking a mammoth shit that wrecked an entire hotel.

    steam_sig.png
  • ArtreusArtreus Hey kids, want some drugs?Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I hate people peeing all over the seats. It is really frustrating. Also gross. Come on. I mean if you are going to have shitty aim at least be decent and clean it up.

    Tonight I was at the bars and was privy to a manly conversation in the men's restroom. Just one man complimenting another man on his beard.

    http://atlanticus.tumblr.com/ PSN: Atlanticus 3DS: 1590-4692-3954 Steam: Artreus
  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Who is it that told that story about how they were shitting and some kid peeked under the stall and he cut a huge fart and the kid threw up and they just kinda looked at each other?

    www.facebook.com/itgetsworseska
    Spoiler:
  • BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I avoid any bathroom that isn't mine like the cesspools they are.

    Battletag BYToady#1454
  • stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Who is it that told that story about how they were shitting and some kid peeked under the stall and he cut a huge fart and the kid threw up and they just kinda looked at each other?

    Whoever it is deserves a medal.

  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    someone has it in their sig and i can't think of who.

    www.facebook.com/itgetsworseska
    Spoiler:
  • ArtreusArtreus Hey kids, want some drugs?Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Who is it that told that story about how they were shitting and some kid peeked under the stall and he cut a huge fart and the kid threw up and they just kinda looked at each other?

    It was also reported for awesome but I have no idea who it was or how long ago.

    http://atlanticus.tumblr.com/ PSN: Atlanticus 3DS: 1590-4692-3954 Steam: Artreus
  • TyrantCowTyrantCow Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Who is it that told that story about how they were shitting and some kid peeked under the stall and he cut a huge fart and the kid threw up and they just kinda looked at each other?

    i remember this story

    and the story about the story still makes me laugh.

  • InkyblotsInkyblots Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    This is kind of embarrassing for me as well as the other kid but in high school I really had to go number 2 so I run to the closest bathroom. There was only 2 stalls if I recall correctly (this was almost 10 years ago) so I sit down and try to do my business and I notice this noise coming from the next stall, this kid's belt buckle keeps making a clanking noise. I am almost 100% positive he was masturbating and I am farting and shitting up a storm but despite a few pauses he keeps on going.

    Not sure if I used that particular restroom the rest of high school.

  • Indie WinterIndie Winter Nattravnen Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I made a janitor quit in elementary school

    The Poo So Bad It Beat The Professionals

    ShhxB.gif
  • stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I was laughing heavily for a good couple of minutes just then. Thank you Metzger.

  • InkyblotsInkyblots Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Also I feel bad for this guy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-OYM7AhW7Q

    Other countries are confusing!

  • FandeathisFandeathis Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    someone has it in their sig and i can't think of who.


    Isn't it in Pip's sig?

    You fuck wit' Die Antwoord, you fuck wit' da army.
  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    don't thank me, thank the guy whose farts make kids puke.

    www.facebook.com/itgetsworseska
    Spoiler:
  • Muse Among MenMuse Among Men Suburban Bunny Princess? Its time for a new shtick Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Unless you live in a dorm situation or are sleeping over at a hotel . . . Why would you poop somewhere that is not your house?

  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.

    www.facebook.com/itgetsworseska
    Spoiler:
  • HeadCreepsHeadCreeps Somnambulist SocietyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Does anyone else think it's strange when people text while they're taking a shit?

    *tap tap tap tap tap*
    huuuuurrrrrggg *plop*
    *tap tap tap tap*

    enjoy_zps609f0bad.png
  • BlankzillaBlankzilla The Year 198X Being Xtreme to the MaxxRegistered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Unless you live in a dorm situation or are sleeping over at a hotel . . . Why would you poop somewhere that is not your house?
    You have to go and going home isn't an option?

    Such as work, or school or many other situations

  • TyrantCowTyrantCow Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    this thread and the food thread should make babbies.

  • Platypus BeirutPlatypus Beirut Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Most of the graffiti in my university's restrooms seems to be from the 90s.

  • Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood Living Proof That Sometimes Friends Are Mean.Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    one time i went into a stall that was pristine except for a pile of poop right on the floor in front of the toilet

    true story!

    OWQbJgI.png
  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    one time i spent nearly half an hour reading all the graffiti on the inside of a stall at my junior high school.

    www.facebook.com/itgetsworseska
    Spoiler:
  • BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Blankzilla wrote: »
    Unless you live in a dorm situation or are sleeping over at a hotel . . . Why would you poop somewhere that is not your house?
    You have to go and going home isn't an option?

    Such as work, or school or many other situations

    Thankfully I'm regular enough that I can time my poops while only at home. Peeing doesn't matter since I don't actually have to touch any part of the bathroom other than the floor.

    Battletag BYToady#1454
  • OlivawOlivaw good name, isn't it? peach treesRegistered User regular
    edited February 2011
    HeadCreeps wrote: »
    Does anyone else think it's strange when people text while they're taking a shit?

    *tap tap tap tap tap*
    huuuuurrrrrggg *plop*
    *tap tap tap tap*

    shapeimage_1.jpg
    Most of the graffiti in my university's restrooms seems to be from the 90s.

    Every once in a while I see someone has carved into a stall wall "Toy Story 2 was okay"

    And I smile

    7u0YG.gif
    PSN ID : DetectiveOlivaw | TWITTER | SCREENED | STEAM ID | BUY SOME STUFF!
  • UbikUbik i am a god in a french-ass restaurantRegistered User regular
    edited February 2011
    I once walked up to the entrance to the men's room at a large train station, there was a dude covered in blood, blood all over the walls and police standing around.
    I held it until I got home instead.

    are you a small amish boy and the sole witness to a brutal murder of a police officer?

    CleezusSig_zpsfa821add.png
  • HeadCreepsHeadCreeps Somnambulist SocietyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2011
    Ubik wrote: »
    I once walked up to the entrance to the men's room at a large train station, there was a dude covered in blood, blood all over the walls and police standing around.
    I held it until I got home instead.

    are you a small amish boy and the sole witness to a brutal murder of a police officer?

    :^::^:

    enjoy_zps609f0bad.png
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