King Joffrey Baratheon's Game of Thrones thread

Rolo

Greetings, peasant.



You will now post in this Game of Thrones thread, to the death!



This is my mother. Mother! I want these peasants to post in my thread now! I'm the King, they should do as I say!



This was my father. He was the King but I'm the King now! So there!



This man is a liar and a filthy traitor and I will have his head on a spike. So sayeth me, the King!

You're so stupid you probably don't even know when to watch the show where I am King of Westeros.


I can't believe I'm letting such ignorant peasants post in my thread. But Mother says I must be a gentle King so I will only have half of you killed.

Let my thread... begin!

Rolo

Also if you post spoilers in my thread without tags from the proper episode/book, I will have you drawn and quartered, your head chopped off and then mounted on a spike and tarred and then you will be raped by all of my guards, in that order!

Hamju

Wait, will the guards rape my body minus my head, or my head while it's on a spike?

Balefuego

I was mad you stole my thread at first but this is pretty great

Rolo

Hamju wrote: »

Wait, will the guards rape my body minus my head, or my head while it's on a spike?

KILL THIS MAN! I WANT HIM DEAD!

Balefuego wrote:

I was mad you stole my thread at first but this is pretty great

This thread is mine by rights. Nobody can take it from me!

Galy

This thread needs more gifs of Joffrey getting slapped around.

godmode

Galy wrote: »

This thread needs more gifs of Joffrey getting slapped around.

I was thinking the exact same thing.

Langly

I doubt that Joffrey would approve of that

Balefuego

Langly wrote: »

I doubt that Joffrey would approve of that

You will adress His Grace by his title you impudent dog

godmode

You know what would make Joffrey feel better?
Book 3:

Spoiler:

Perhaps a glass of wine.

TheBigEasy

Balefuego wrote: »

Langly wrote: »

I doubt that Joffrey would approve of that

You will adress His Grace by his title you impudent dog

Since when are

Spoiler:

bastards

allowed to be King?

EDIT: Well ... since he didn't spoiler that part about Robert in the OP, I thought it would be ok ... but hey, I am new here, so what do I know .

godmode

Thpoilerth

Veretas

Boooooo Joffrey suuuucks boooooooo

Macro9

Drink up, King Joffrey.

May your reign be long and glorious.

godmode

TheBigEasy wrote: »

Balefuego wrote: »

Langly wrote: »

I doubt that Joffrey would approve of that

You will adress His Grace by his title you impudent dog

Since when are

Spoiler:

bastards

allowed to be King?

EDIT: Well ... since he didn't spoiler that part about Robert in the OP, I thought it would be ok ... but hey, I am new here, so what do I know .

Honestly, I just take every opportunity possible to say "thpoilerth" whether it's considered known or not.

Staleghoti

What's impunent?

Balefuego

I think at this point it's safe to talk about the fact that Joffrey is really Jaime's kid

TheBigEasy

Balefuego wrote: »

I think at this point it's safe to talk about the fact that Joffrey is really Jaime's kid

"It is known!"

Balefuego

poor Jaime

Rolo

Actually (book 1-3 spoilers)

Spoiler:

Do Jaime and Joffrey ever have a conversation over the course of the series? Jaime is pretty much gone from the time he fights Ned in King's Landing until they're at war with the Starks, and Joff is dead by the time he gets back... do they ever exchange words prior to that?

Turambar

*huff puff*



Phew, made it

Staleghoti

Don't Jamie and.... uhhh.... evilbitch have

Spoiler:

ANOTHER kid too? who is way more incesty looking? I swear I saw him for a fraction of a second when the family pulls into Winterfel in the first episode

Lorahalo

godmode wrote: »

You know what would make Joffrey feel better?
Book 3:

Spoiler:

Perhaps a glass of wine.

Spoiler:

I'll get it, just lemme fix my hairnet real quick.

Peter Ebel

Staleghoti wrote: »

Don't Jamie and.... uhhh.... evilbitch have

Spoiler:

ANOTHER kid too? who is way more incesty looking? I swear I saw him for a fraction of a second when the family pulls into Winterfel in the first episode

Spoiler:

There are two more incest babies. Prince Tommen and princess Myrcella. They are minor characters we don't see much.

Balefuego

Rolo wrote: »

Actually (book 1-3 spoilers)

Spoiler:

Do Jaime and Joffrey ever have a conversation over the course of the series? Jaime is pretty much gone from the time he fights Ned in King's Landing until they're at war with the Starks, and Joff is dead by the time he gets back... do they ever exchange words prior to that?

Spoiler:

Nope. Brienne even asks him about it in book 3 I think, and I think he says Cersei would never even let him hold the babies because she thought people would get suspicious.

The only time he ever really shows any paternal feelings is in the dungeon with Tyrion

Balefuego

Myrcella and Tommen are super sweet though

Rolo

what

Staleghoti

I swear I saw a bucktoothed blonde kid in that first episode.

I should take a screencap of it

Balefuego

Myrcella and Tommen were in episode 2 eating breakfast with Cersei and Jaime and giggling at Tyrion's jokes

Peter Ebel

Damn, Bale, do you just sit around with autism level precision bizarrely self annotated versions of these books or what?

Balefuego

Tommen does love cats

Rolo

It was pretty easy to spot them in that scene if you've read the books more than once.

Rolo

Balefuego wrote: »

Tommen does love cats

Stannis does not approve of cats.

End

Balefuego wrote: »

Tommen does love cats

Joffrey loves to open them up.

Rolo

Only to see the kittens inside!

Peter Ebel

This "C.B.", also known as "B.C." is hereby declared an enemy of the realm.

End

well, of course

Balefuego

Peter Ebel wrote: »

Damn, Bale, do you just sit around with autism level precision bizarrely self annotated versions of these books or what?

I read Game of Thrones for the first time in 1996


I've had a lot of time to absorb

Lorahalo

I noticed them too. They weren't THAT hard to spot. Tyrion even picked up Tommen.

Peter Ebel

Balefuego wrote: »

Peter Ebel wrote: »

Damn, Bale, do you just sit around with autism level precision bizarrely self annotated versions of these books or what?

I read Game of Thrones for the first time in 1996


I've had a lot of time to absorb

I'm reading the first book again. I barely recognize any of the shit that goes on and I seem to have forgotten almost everything from the later books.

Lorahalo

You know, when I read Storm of Swords again recently
Book 3:

Spoiler:

I completely forgot about Stannis rocking up at the Wall. I remembered Jon getting elected and I remember the wildling attack but I completely forgot about Stannis. You'd think I'd remember something as important as the location of one of the kings.