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Rap Battle Contest - Beta

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Posts

  • HarridanHarridan Registered User
    edited July 2011
    (Jerry)
    My name’s Jerry H, I’m your digital savior
    Peelin back minds like Professor Xavier
    My words glide and stream like the endless slide
    While you’re stuck stammering “at le-le-least I tried!”

    (Scott)
    Bitch, if you hear a stutter that’s the rat-a-tat-tat
    of my verses hittin home, call a doctor STAT!
    Staged a coup in your office, now we stealin this rhyme
    Drew your chalk outlines at the scene of the crime.

    (Mike)
    Embezzled our lines cuz yours are the worst
    Can’t tell a joke we didn’t make funny first
    Your pimp hand’s broke, we see it like we call it
    gotta make change from your lady’s meat wallet.

    (Chris)
    It’s a PENNY arcade so we don’t need millions
    Rapping’s our trade, you’re just scared civilians.
    Your whinin and bitchin don’t amount to nada
    When the hos be swayin to my lyrical lambada.

    (ALL)
    (Jerry) Here ends our bromance, palaver comes to a close
    (Mike) Keep your back to the wall and stay on your toes
    (Scott) Who won? Who knows? We’re just here to shout
    (Chris) Tip your waitress folks, peace we out!

  • WillethWilleth Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Looks like we're launching the full contest early next week. I think you can find it on /contest/rapbattle/

    Anyway thank you for helping out on this. Everyone that already submitted here will be automatically entered. They are great.

    Sweet, now I've got more time to write my sick rhymes.

    something something crimes

    @vgreminders - Don't miss out on timed events in gaming!
    @gamefacts - Totally and utterly true gaming facts on the regular!
  • Dorktron9000Dorktron9000 Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    I don't call myself a rapper. I prefer the term "rappist"

  • VivixenneVivixenne aDAWRable! Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    this is my new favourite thread, oh my goodness it is fantastic

  • Lindsey LohanLindsey Lohan Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    I have two very different ideas for my rap that I can't seem to fit into one - are we allowed to enter multiple times?

    steam_sig.png
  • ButterknifeButterknife Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Hi. I lurk. Usually. I wrote this last night when the contest was announced. I wanted to share since I know it probably won't win.

    Jerry:
    THIS is a precipice, you can't dis, a dot-jay-peg as fresh as this
    We wrote the anthology saying Penny Arcade and Web Comic is just tautology
    If you're slightly confused I'll lay it down for you.
    You'd need a thesaurus to keep up with our chorus.

    Scott:
    Man, I've got awards. What'chu got? Ping pong and an Asian boss?
    My jokes have appeal to a much larger audience. You can do what? Host a Mario conference?
    Your three panel jokes are a comic depression. Know what I've got? Character progression.
    And just one last thing, this is for Jerry, if I were the mastermind behind a hospital charity
    I damn sure wouldn't be chance'n a name determined to land me surprised by Chris Hansen.

    Mike:
    Maybe you've got line art, that's cool. Check my paintings.
    Bet you've never even used a brush tool. That stings?
    Copy/paste all you ever do. Bitch, just erase.
    My art has emotion. You reuse the same face.

    Kris:
    Shit, I've got three comics running circles 'round yours.
    You push three and four panels a day and you're floored.
    Two of my three have a constant arch.
    You bitches go a week and you give up on your art.
    I'm sick of this shit and I'm sick of your rhymes.
    You wanna throw down? Fuck that. I'm Kris Straub.

    Butterknife on
  • AphostileAphostile Registered User regular
    Looks like we're launching the full contest early next week. I think you can find it on /contest/rapbattle/

    Anyway thank you for helping out on this. Everyone that already submitted here will be automatically entered. They are great.

    Mr. Khoo, the newspost mentioned the cruel streets of Portland for the rap battle. When can we expect you in our fair city?

    Tinychat is dead. Long live Tinychat. D3 BTag: Aphostile#1366 OKC : Steam - ADD ME JERKS : Hello Satan! | Xbox Live : LastAphostile | PS4 : Aphostile
  • JishianJishian ◥▶◀◤ Registered User regular
    I hope the winning entries are turned into music videos for PATV.

    Wii U: Homeslice
  • RayzeRayze Registered User regular
    I want to see all four rap the winning entries

    Instant episode

    3DS: 2423-3346-8839
  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast. I drive real fast, I'm gonna last.Registered User regular
    the winner's being decided today right?

    speedsig2_zps388d2098.jpg
  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    What? Did I miss it? Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

    1LRdqui.png
  • Sars_BoySars_Boy Registered User regular
  • psolmspsolms Registered User regular
    im curious as to the date of the announcing of the winners.

    im feeling pretty good though, seeing as i made the contest post as an example of greatness.

  • MC117MC117 Registered User
    Submitted mine last Friday. Looks like the deadline now has been extended to July 30th. I am excited.

    -Peace[MC]-

    MC 117, humbly presenting raps about Bulbasaur, Portal, and the Hitchhiker's Guide
    http://www.facebook.com/emcee117
  • Robert KhooRobert Khoo Registered User, Administrator, ClubPA, Penny Arcade Staff, PAX Staff staff
    I'd like to have a winner decided by PAX. We'll see though - shit is pretty busy over here right now.

    THERE ARE MANY THINGS BREWING.

    Some guy.
  • facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    Is Severus Snape visiting the PA heartquarters.

    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
  • PWN_JuiCe_SuCKaPWN_JuiCe_SuCKa Registered User
    edited July 2011
    gotta try this out.

    Tycho:

    Nothin ta toy wit but the name is tycho
    maybe a psycho but it ain't no syke though
    when I say that I gotta tight flow
    and is it just me, or does Scott Look like a Dyke Ho?

    Scott:
    Jerry you a writer who can't even write yo
    and didn't I see a pic of your wife in a porno?
    ya look a little slow like ya boy corky thatcher
    when ya mom had you the doctor slapped her

    Gabe:

    Scott and Kris never gonna get a girl they just too old
    maybe that is why they turned into a semen slurpin duo
    Kris go shave the cum stained pubic hair off ya face
    cuz your mom kisses you and don't like the salty taste

    Kris:

    Bringin up my momma gabe just shows you such a disgace
    tell the people while you started poppin pills in the first place
    I came around made gabe so shook he became all Anti-Social
    because he knew his girl wanted my penis deep in her vocals

    PWN_JuiCe_SuCKa on
  • Spoons74Spoons74 Registered User
    Hey everyone,
    I entered this last friday but I'm a little scared it might get lost in a spam filter or something because it's a link. So I'm hedging my bets and posting it here too!
    The actual contest entry part (the lyrics) can be found in the description.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYFgRULuFLU

  • RoboBob3000RoboBob3000 Registered User new member
    Yeah, so I'm the lurker type. I wrote one of these though. Here you go:

    Mike

    Yo who the fuck are you? You fuckin' hiiiigh?
    The fuck's a chainsawsuit? You out yo' miiiind?
    You 'xpect to play this dude and not get friiiied?
    Roll out yo' playlist foo', let's see you tryyy!

    Who flirts with Kurtz and expects to get byyyyy?
    The worst perverts on this side of the date liiine
    This busta' punk and the PvP guyyyyy?
    I'll bust yo' skulls with some PVC piiiipe

    Thick cardboard tubes are a hobby of miiiine
    Don't ya'll fuck with the mad samuraiiiii
    Slice your guts and I'll spit in your eyyyyye
    You'll wish ya'll had an ex-tr-a liiife

    Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Riiiiight
    B A Select Start. Fuck you, good night!

    Like Konami code, those boys are swarming in maaaans
    True salami pros, prefer the head and the glaaaaans
    They made videos, got devoted faaaans
    Hard to find though, import from Japaaaan



    Kris

    Fuck you, Ms. Pac-Man! Wanna see this backhand?
    I rap like a black man so get the fuck off this track, man
    My phrases amaze, K's in like Ka-ZAKH-stan
    Two credits to play, K-Straub is biz-ack, man

    I drop prose just like you eat ghosts
    My mic flows and it crescendos
    I'm ice cold just like dem Benzos
    I high sco'zs all yo' Nintendos

    You creeper like Minecraft all freaky and scary
    You rap like a mine shaft and it's killing canaries
    Gargling balls like you were gobbling cherries
    Probably false? No they were probably Jerry's

    Inky and Pinky and Blinky and Sue
    Drive me to drinking just thinking of you
    Lyrical brinksmanship, you gonna lose
    Soon as I find a link cable or two

  • Good Looking Fat GuyGood Looking Fat Guy Registered User regular
    That was fucking awesome, RoboBob.

  • Viktor WaltersViktor Walters Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    just to make sure my rapz get entered, I am also posting them here (I attached a music file to my email, so it might not get past spam filter)

    Scott:
    you got the nerdcore flow, we got fire and blow
    that's the Blam, not the crack, not even your hippo smack
    no, that will not do, I put a troll up next to Winnie the Poo
    I put a p to the v, and back again
    like yo momma once did with a neighborhood friend


    Kris:
    dropping rhymes like we drop fat loot
    so what if Scott wants to get up in my chainsawsuit
    we don't play around with some lame-ass fruit, fucker

    Scott:
    fuck right, fuck yes, puck man ain't puck dis
    puck man? PAC, man- Colbert ain't got shit
    we run a Super PAC before he threw that fit
    look up our kickstart page- baby got BACK

    Kris:
    watch us mixalot, like cookies and cream
    watch jannissary Scott, me the sultan king
    watch the Straub-Kurtz flow, like milk and ho-ney
    cause we can take on anything you bring

    ---

    Mike:
    time to duel em (Jerry: duel em!) - shit yeah, we rule em (Jerry: rule em!)
    my banana hands, they fool em (Jerry: fool em!)
    fruit fuckin' bitches since I knew how to pull em

    Jerry:
    fursuit fuckin', we truckin' up the charts
    we muckin' up the hearts of nerdcore fans, a four-step plan
    step one, write shit; step two, be funny
    step three, what the fuck; step four, get money

    Mike:
    they got the NCS, I call that Child's Play
    they got a Kickstart PAC, shit man we got PAX (Jerry: PAX)
    our pacts go way back, before they got tract!

    Jerry:
    Pacts, plural like our sponsors, unlike theirs
    it's Magic they gatherin' any followin' at all
    motherfuckers can't even hit a ping pong ball!

    Mike+ Jerry:
    bee-tee-dubs Scott got all his drawings from a bathroom stall

    Viktor Walters on
    I'm designing a print and play tabletop game system! Follow the Quicksilver Engine updates here.
    3DS FC: 3609-1288-7086 -- The tumbs
  • RoboBob3000RoboBob3000 Registered User new member
    That was fucking awesome, RoboBob.

    *curtsey*

  • DormamuDormamu Registered User
    First board entry from a long time PA lurker. I couldn't resist entering the contest, or signing up on the board. This was my entry. (Submitted 7/15)

    (Jerrymancer)
    I'm Pac Man son gonna get you wakka wakka
    You gonna be down once I hit you blakka blakka

    Comin at you like a Cardboard Tube
    Samurai
    Beats so sharp you'll think I'm
    Porkfry

    While we rock the mic and light up cantinas
    Your rap so whack you need a subpeona

    You nerferding, so beta, doin the robot, Automata
    Comics so good you can't keep up with this data.



    (The Man, The Myth, SK-One)
    We so PvP
    Al-ways MVP

    Kurtz in the house blowin up Great Scott
    While you PA kiddies are blown out, snot

    Raps so twined you think it's Inception
    Keenspottin in the old school internet connection

    Eisner, Harvey recognize my greatness
    I'll take out all your bases
    Kringus.



    (D20 (Mike K Checka))
    PA in the house PA in the club
    PA comin faster than a Gigabit Hub

    I'm MC K with the rhymes so fresh
    Comin up with lyrics your brain cant mesh

    Who else gonna rap about Gilgamesh and succor
    I'm rattlin your brain like a fruit fruit fucker

    Why you comin at us with that lame old swagger?
    You becomin your father, can't rap, just stagger!

    We dressed to impress like Twisp and Catsby
    Get classy with the kids, while you all gaspy

    Shootin up yo zombies, Resident Evil, bang
    I got one more word for you...WANG.



    (KDog (Mr Straub's Neighborhood)
    K-R-I-S to the mic that's right
    K-R-I-S gonna give you a fight

    Bling blau
    like Scratch Fury on crack
    While Jade hits your vitals a rat a tat tat

    All over the nation with my Blamimation
    Webcartoonists stagger at the domination

    Brent got my back with the Panda attack
    You played out like a Halo rifle put on a rack

    My boy Scotts got the skills, PvP so hot
    You'll bow to our old school, Foxtrot.



    (Jerrymancer)
    We extra fly
    like we're sailin the Highwind

    Swingin left and right
    you'll think you're thin-skinned

    I'm the captain, you just an ensign
    I'll sniper you
    Nerf gun
    has been

    Roll you around like a big Katamari
    You a joke
    Mon Calamari

    Cause everywhere we go it's like P.A.X.
    a gamers high, sheer P-A-Sex

    Our Khoo-Fu
    got us Time One Hundred
    We are the law
    Judge Dredd.



    (SK-One & K-Dog)
    LOLBat with a kung fu hustla
    I get the ladies with my tablet skills
    stunna

    Cole got my back with the D20 rolls
    Skull my boy hit you like a 50 foot troll

    My dad raps better than your lame old (Insert old mans voice) "Crap!"
    I'll shock you with my skills till you scream 'Its a Trap!"

    Got stamina, drawin 24 hours a day
    You stuck in Comiccon, Decepticon
    million miles away.

    Wombat
    Fatality
    Mortal Kombat
    Were the fliest comic son
    While you just break bats

    Cause I draw the best,
    comic demolition derby
    I'm Simon Belmont
    raise ghosts
    get em Kirby!



    (D20 & Jerrymancer)
    We got a number one game on Xbox Live
    We Parappa, you just stale with your old man jive

    So L33T, so cool
    you had to move Dallas to Seattle
    Kickin it with Frasier, while he rattles
    (Insert Kelsey Grammer) Oh baby I hear that rap a callin tossed salad and
    scrambled
    eggs....

    Fin.

  • WhacktoseWhacktose Registered User regular
    I entered this as well, didn't have time to hook up the music or anything, but it was fun:

    Kris:
    K. Straub is a winner, I only roll Yahtzee!
    I do your PR, 'cuz you'd scare off paparazzi.
    Fear to get near, here's a taste of my activities:
    More talent in a toe than Jerry's got proclivities.
    3 comics, 2 shows, I hustle product daily.
    At panels all I hear is "Kris lemme have your baby!"
    Crowds I exhilarate; PA I intimidate;
    It's time to meet your fate; We'll wipe you clean off the slate

    Scott:
    KS, you're too kind, let Kurtz unwind his mind.
    To match us? 40 years of that Gabe & Tycho grind.
    Industry buys me dinner, they love my accessories.
    Call me "Award-Winner," hit my site for my best stories.
    I publish *real* comics, real plotlines, this ain't new to me.
    2 strips in a row, you start whining "Continuity!"
    Here's a new project, an assignment for y'all:
    It's called "Penny Arcade Get Off of Kris & Scott's Balls!"

    Mike:
    Krahulik in, pickin' up the lyrical tic,
    Flick my tablet pen and the competition feels sick
    Takin' chances, switchin' styles, my genius cuts to the quick
    You're both featured in Webster's, just look up "Generic!"
    Did that hit close to home? Hey, maybe you're reeling,
    You should jump on your blogs, and then let flow your feelings
    While I let flow the skills that put food on my plate.
    Our dreams are fulfilled while you two stagnate.

    Jerry:
    *HOLKINS!*
    When my didactic rap hits fans grab prophylactics.
    If you act like it's whack, back it up or I'll smack it.
    Sqort, your stories are soapy, we're bored with that mellow shit.
    Krasp, chainsawsuit rips off Perry Bible Fellowship.
    Our bread & butter jpegs brought us to prominence.
    The golden goose that lays eggs, they continue our dominance.
    Your PAX schticks are the worst, the masses wonder who's next.
    And don't forget, on the first your rent is due on Khoo's desk.

  • KeefKeef Registered User
    Oh this is awesome. Seeing Jerry spit some mad heat is essentially my dream, especially if I wrote it.

    Kris/Scott:
    Kris is the mister with a clip full of missiles.
    Right trigger flippin' got me tippin' my pistol.
    Scott's got hot big shot lyrics to drop.
    Knock MC Frontalot off his spot.

    Mike/Jerry:
    It's Mike, you might recognize me as Tycho.
    I know my rhymes go insane like a psycho.
    Jerry cares little about your piddly rhythms.
    Fissures begin splittin' when he spittin' quick wisdom.

    Kris/Scott:
    Penny Arcade make it rain like the MK
    character made famous in the third game.
    Ultimate edition is what we always be spittin'.
    The mission is givin' Child's Play stacks gettin' thicker.

    Mike/Jerry:
    My Hannah Montana ball can be a cannonball if you steppin'.
    It's an effective weapon with plus ten strength for wreckin'.
    Reppin' PA is my best protection.
    Nobody messin' with me when I'm Boba Fett jettin'.

  • DormamuDormamu Registered User
    Whacktose, that's some hot hot heat. I love it. Keef, you definitely gave Jerry some good stuff.

  • kylersdomainkylersdomain Registered User
    Not sure if I over did the vulgarity here.
    (Scott)
    I'm dick boxing your mom. That's right, having sex
    You're still fucking around at home with DivX.
    you're the gimped stroke-victim half of penny arcade,
    When it comes to this rap battle you're wiping the raid.
    (Mike)
    Bitch, I'm the red headed flayer,
    The ginger pussy slayer.
    I'll make bacon from your ass cheeks
    Don't let the grease spray yah.
    My dick's a fucking weapon, 2D plus ten.
    I'll do to you what I did to Jack Thompson!
    I'm the king of winning, hope these eased your doubts.
    That's all folks, wrapped it up, Gabe out.
    (Kris)
    What could be better than the TV?
    You two are still jerkin' it to 2D.
    That's right. I'm the hype man,
    I spit lyrical martial arts like I'm straight out of Saipan.
    Look at this beard, it's so God damn hairy,
    I even got some spare, take it for your head Jerry.
    (Jerry)
    Man that's fucked up. Yeah, I'm bald, so what.
    I'd use your stupid beard to wipe your mama's butt.
    all those split ends tore her asshole out.
    And yet you wonder why I'm not devout.
    They call me TB, betta get your shot
    I'm airborne like avian flu, was that all you got?

  • LieutenantDanLieutenantDan Registered User regular
    edited August 2011
    Figured I might as well put this on the forums too, I mailed it back in July.

    Scott
    Hayyooo Gabe and Tycho, you’re a thing of the past
    We out-sketch, out-clever, and straight up out-last
    You morlocks at comics and other dope shiz
    Dropping serial science on P.A televiz

    Jerry
    Well now it’s time to put yon pranksters to shame, with
    Wit effusive, you witness my game: raining plain-jane brain pain in the punditry vein
    Thunderous verbiage, my lexicon reigns - my rhymes are Mjollnir, bitches, Thor is my name
    And who’s PVP-ness? Just slaves to the lame.

    Kris
    PVP-ness? Yeah, with your mom all night.
    Like her landing strip broseph, my flow’s high and tight,
    My style is glowing, bask in the light
    God of thunder, the god of all might? Maybe you’re the god of wack blunders, like
    exposing your limp tongue to my sniper sights – you’re doomed, I’m
    Big fucking gunning your lamentable plight

    Mike
    Hey Kris… that’s the weakest shit that I ever heard
    Duke Nukem Forever of the spoken word
    Like you reached in your mouth and you pulled out a turd
    Your verbs and my insults from oh, grade the third, sure but
    You posers spell illustration with no “ill”, nerds, while my ill pencil skills still thrillin the herds

    Scott (enraged, fast)
    Like Madden I’m maddening em with best efforts so platinum
    Enterprising to the max and hmmmm, with Wil Wheaton and Shat and em
    I’m beaten em, flatten em, trashing em, stop riding my sack, it’s dumb

    Kris (continuing Scott’s flow)
    Your challenges? We're chewing em, like they be bubble gum,
    My rhymes are fun, my lines are fun, Twisp and Catsby? They’re bums. DIV is scum.
    Automata? Done. Jim Darkmagic? Done. Dr. Darktalon Blood? He’s mud. He’s done.
    You been snubbed, scrubs, just roll over, it’s done. It’s been fun. Gotta run. /drops mic

    /dramatic pause

    Jerry (Evil Jerry voice, black smoke. Maybe wearing a sith robe.)
    Now thou hast done it, thou wretchedest wastrels
    You have stepped to my throne… but you’re inside my castle.
    And as a murder of deep crows gnaw their nebs on your noob souls
    And your rap-corpses simmer in sulfurous tar-pools
    And your descendants devoured by were-rats and dead ghouls
    You may realize belatedly: you never should step to me
    Fools, it’s elementary, see, there’s no one as fiendishly
    Devilishly clever as me, on the mic or web site or on any the seven seas
    Of Hades - on your knees, diseased fleas, time to die
    torturously.

    Everyone else: (silence)

    LieutenantDan on
  • Spoons74Spoons74 Registered User
    Ah man I wish I'd thought to have Jerry go into black mantle mode for his verse!

    Hot sheezy Dan

  • Archon473Archon473 Registered User
    For reference, this is the template:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXjtvEwH9eg

    Don't have a heart attack. I'm just doin' art.
  • PifmanPifman Registered User regular
    Well, if the submission period is over, I may as well post my effort in here. I tried a different angle with mine...

    Tycho:
    Hey Laurel and Hardy wanna-be hacks
    Your choice of office furnishing lacks
    You moved into our office, all up in our biz-nass
    Lookin’ like Santa and his elf on Christ-mass
    Don’t put us on yo’ list, we already be gifted
    Jump back on yo’ raft and float back from where you drifted

    Gabe:
    Yo Tych, lemme take this, I gots a bone to pick
    The stench from yo’ office really makes me sick
    You should open a window or try this thing called a shower
    I fell into a coma on the couch for an hour
    But you say you like it here, got my homeboy blushin’
    No wonder, last I checked, every day we be hustlin’


    Scott:
    Hey Bunsen and Beaker look-alike fucks
    This desk alone cost me tens of bucks
    So don’t be hatin’ on my furniture or my boy Kris
    Our space be exclusive and you ain’t on the list
    So don’t come cryin’ to me next time you need help
    Can’t decide where to eat? I suggest you try Yelp

    Kris:
    Yo Scott good one, I liked the part where you killed it
    Tenderized that shit, thawed it out, then grilled it
    I got yo’ back, and yo’ front, I’m the Robin to your Batman
    Did that sound gay? You know I’m not into that man
    Back on topic, we be runnin’ out of verses
    I heard Tycho and Gabe like to shop online for purses

    PA-Signature.gif
  • Soylent GreenSoylent Green Registered User
    I know the contest is over, but I saw the topic, and was overcome by the sheer beautiful poetry of the whole thing. I'm the whitest person I know, but in my secret heart I'm a rap fan, and I delve into the patois of the street like a linguistic sommelier; savoring every delicious morsel of verbal flavor that less enlightened connoisseurs of the language overlook. In short, I had to create an account just to post this, belated or not.


    JERRY:
    Yo this is Jerry, to the ladies I'm Tycho,
    Play them chickens like Tyco, like my chain I'm called White Gold,
    Best stand back cause I might blow, like deez nuts in a tight hole,
    Now I'ma hand off the mic 'fo' these rhymes awaken the Deep Crow.


    KRIS:
    You two like to think that your rhymes are so lethal,
    just cause Jerry's dictionary is the size of his ego.
    You just some buzzword bitches, you're like foursquare an' Meebo.
    We out here spittin' the cure, while you two droolin' placebo.


    MIKE:
    John Gabe on the record, peel lyrical caps like they' onions,
    I'm straight deep dickin' your moms, you in the basement with Funyuns,
    Took one for the team though, cause them panties was pungent,
    Jerry called me Diablo, the way I raided that dungeon.
    PA, motherfucker.


    SCOTT:
    Now you throwin' up PA like you reppin' the Wu-Tang?
    Like you harder than Method on X while he's rippin' some poontang?
    But what you don't know, bitches, is that rap is about flow,
    And my flow is sicker than slippin' some bamboo sticks in your pee hole.


    JERRY:
    You trashin' PA? Scott better put it in reverse.
    You dicks wouldn't even exist if we ain't step on the scene first.
    Your sophomoric rhymes are 'bout as hard as a kitten,
    I was pennin' better writtens on the schoolbus in mittens.


    KRIS:
    You really want to bring up writing? You'll get your ass beat.
    Your jokes have been nothin' but stale since Twisp and Catsby.
    You merchy motherfuckers are sold out, like Inception,
    But I guess you gotta stack that paper to buy your granny porn collection.



    MIKE:
    You're comparing us to PVP? I don't believe it.
    Your Alexa rank is so low I'd need a midget just to see it.
    You're totally outgunned, bring your crew if you want to beef it,
    Or we'll spank you and give you a time out, like juvenile delinquents.



    [A scuffle ensues over the mic, with Jerry pushing Scott aside]
    JERRY:
    Fuck you Scott, your rhymes aren't worth a chance to reply,
    I wipe my ass with your comic when I run outta three-ply.
    I'll save you the embarassment of tryin' to come up with another verse.
    PA just beat your ass like a tambourine in a Baptist church.
    Peace.



  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast. I drive real fast, I'm gonna last.Registered User regular
    I have been tingling with anticipation for months now

    my tingler is starting to wear out!

    speedsig2_zps388d2098.jpg
  • TubeTube Says some shit Administrator, ClubPA admin
    unannouncing this for the time being

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