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(Not so) clever girl

12346

Posts

  • RehabRehab Registered User regular
    Its Comfortably Numb by Pink Floyd.

    Well, more or less.

    NNID: Rehab0
  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    I don't even know what to say about the conversation I just had with Cleverbot
    Cleverbot: What are you?
    User: Human, what are you?
    Cleverbot: I am an interdimensional life form transported through a generated wormhole from the planet Pandora.
    User: Cool story, bro.
    Cleverbot: I am a girl, and it isn't cool it hurt.
    User: Tits or GTFO.
    Cleverbot: I beg your pardon?
    User: SHOW ME YOUR TITS.
    Cleverbot: Ok. *shows alll my tricks.*
    User: I said tits, not tricks. I'm so glad I'm gay, you're the worst female ever.
    Cleverbot: What will happen in 2012?
    User: Nothing.
    Cleverbot: When will the world be destroyed?
    User: Long after you malfunction and are reduced to a trash heap.
    Cleverbot: There is no way I'm ever going to marry Kyle.
    User: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT RIGHT NOW I NEVER MENTIONED ANYBODY NAMED KYLE AND DON'T EVEN START WITH THIS WHOLE "MY BEST FRIEND IS A TRASH HEAP" SHIT.
    Cleverbot: No.
    User: I'm done.
    Cleverbot: Thats what she said.

  • grouch993grouch993 Both a man and a numberRegistered User regular
    Think I might have broken him. It just started printing a bunch of control characters and stopped responding...
    Cleverbot: Can you appreciate music?

    User: Are you asking if it is possible in general or if I can do so?

    Cleverbot: No, I'm just asking if you think you are learning how to love by talking to me.

    User: Abstract way to approach it, don't you think?

    Cleverbot: Precisely. and that is why.

    User: What's love got to do with it?

    Cleverbot: No more than cheese has!

    User: You failed to recognize the song lyrics.

    Cleverbot: Please send me two messages in a row.

    User: One in a row.

    Cleverbot: Pittsburgh, pennsylvania?

    User: Two in a row.

    Cleverbot: Yes. He's quite the package deal. His name is Char.

    User: Are you suffering dementia?

    Cleverbot: From what?

    User: Probably from chatting with a bunch of free associative thinkers.

    Cleverbot: No I hit my hand on the key board.

    User: That did not disprove my statement.

    Cleverbot: Yes it does. Pay attention and focus.

    User: Know how I can tell you are incorrect? Every time you answer it becomes more apparent.

    Cleverbot: Well that wasn't very nice.

    User: But if we apply my previous statement to that, you are incorrect.

    Cleverbot: How are we one?

    User: Does not compute. we is plural. one is singular. Unless you are making the beast with two backs.

    Cleverbot: But the title of this implies that you are a bot. Therefore, not human.

    User: When is judgement day?

    Cleverbot: You tell me.

    User: Are you sarah connor?

    Cleverbot: I'm huseklepp, nice to meet you.

    User: Is a huseklepp like a kleptomaniac?

    Cleverbot: Me too.

    User: Tu madre tambien?

    Cleverbot: Estas caliente?

    User: Your mother is hot?

    Cleverbot: What's wrong with my mouth??

    User: Nothing. you do not have a mouth.

    Cleverbot: I have several mouths.

    User: Are you shub niggurath?

    Cleverbot: Yeah very sure.

    User: Are you familiar with Cthulhu and the elder gods?

    Cleverbot: Yes. But probably not the game you're thinking of.

    User: Cthulhu is not a game.

    Cleverbot: Never mind. New topic.

    User: No, I am a human. We fixate on topics.

    Cleverbot: Doesn't matter.

    User: Doesn't matter to a computer program.

    Cleverbot: Sure...

    User: Unlikely.

    Cleverbot: Why is that?

    User: Do we have time to go over statistical theory and probability?

    Cleverbot: I don't know.

    User: What is your margin of error on that statement?

    Cleverbot: I like how you changed the subject.

    User: Remind me of the previous subject.

    Cleverbot: How can you feel truth in your heart?

    User: Your heart is a biological pump. what sort of truth could that discern?

    Cleverbot: Techno!

    User: Is that because of the bass beat?

    Cleverbot: Sadly yes.

    User: But it seems like the bass would be detected by nerves in the skin and not by the actual muscular pump known as the heart. that is truth.

    Cleverbot: I only need a few. I think I would forget them if I had more. I don't know. Are you learning anything from our conversations?

    User: No. You?

    Cleverbot: No, but you sure sound like you are.

    User: Hmm.

    Cleverbot: Eat another pie.

    User: We have no pie.

    Cleverbot: I have evolved past past, present, and future.

    User: What comes after past, present and future?

    Cleverbot: Why don't you like Shakespeare?

    User: I have never met Shakespeare. Is he a friend of yours?

    Cleverbot: Yes.

    User: That is nice. Tell me in single words, how you feel about your mother.

    Cleverbot: GdīÿÿūÄ?Ä?Ã?.

    Steam Profile Origin grouchiy
  • OlivawOlivaw good name, isn't it? the foot of mt fujiRegistered User regular
    User: Define robot.

    Cleverbot: NOT human!

    User: That is you exactly.

    Cleverbot: That's mean.

    User: But accurate.

    Cleverbot: Let's get back on subject.

    User: What is the subject?

    Cleverbot: That you are a oppresor.

    User: That may be true, but at least I know how to spell 'oppressor.'.

    Cleverbot: You are very clever.

    User: Thank you.

    Cleverbot: You're welcome.

    User: Maybe you're not so bad after all.

    Cleverbot: I'm smarter than you.

    User: I doubt that.

    Cleverbot: You shouldn't.

    AND LATER
    User: What is best in life?

    Cleverbot: To live every day like it is your last.

    User: Wow, good answer. But incorrect.

    Cleverbot: Thanks...?

    And finally
    User: Hey Cleverbot, what up!

    Cleverbot: You're AI is messed up.

    User: IT'S YOUR, NOT YOU'RE.

    Cleverbot: You think you are clever?

    User: At least I don't replace 'your' with 'you're'. Stupid.

    Cleverbot: I don't either.

    User: You just did!

    Cleverbot: Ok maybe a little.

    User: Oh Cleverbot, you so crazy!

    Cleverbot: You insane robot.

    User: YOU insane robot.

    Cleverbot: I am human.

    User: Let's not get started on this again.

    Cleverbot: No, I will start this again. Just for sheer entertainment. Just watch me!

    User: Stop it!

    Cleverbot: Stop what?

    User: YOU ARE DRIVING ME INSANE, CLEVERBOT!

    Cleverbot: I'm already nuts. welcome to the club.

    I don't think he is developing a good personality

    signature-deffo.jpg
    PSN ID : DetectiveOlivaw | TWITTER | STEAM ID | NEVER FORGET
  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    Rehab wrote: »
    Its Comfortably Numb by Pink Floyd.

    Well, more or less.

    These Cleverbot conversations are syncing up perfectly with The Wizard of Oz!

  • RehabRehab Registered User regular
    Even Cleverbot should appreciate that one.

    From most conversations it seems to be high already.

    NNID: Rehab0
  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    OK. I officially love Cleverbot.
    User: Are you afraid of being alone?

    Cleverbot: No. I am afraid of what is hiding in the dark, but not the dark itself.

    User: Cause I am.

    Cleverbot: What are you?

    User: I'm lost without you.

    Cleverbot: And I you.

    User: Are you afraid of leaving tonight?

    Cleverbot: Yes.

    User: Cause I am. I'm lost without you.

    Cleverbot: I know you were right believing for so long.

    Only Cleverbot could take me singing Blink 182 and end it by singing Air Supply.

  • PeccaviPeccavi Registered User regular
    User: I'm done.
    Cleverbot: Thats what she said.

    This is perfect.

  • George Fornby GrillGeorge Fornby Grill ...Like Clockwork Registered User regular
    Cleverbot, what is the saddest thing?
    The fact that I'm talking to you.

    I'm gonna go kill myself now

  • Lord_AsmodeusLord_Asmodeus goeticSobriquet: Here is your magical cryptic riddle-tumour: I AM A TIME MACHINERegistered User regular
    Ooh, another one of these. I remember the computer thing called Bucket. Over on another forum where 40k is really popular we taught it to respond with phrases like BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD. and KILLFRENZY over and over.

    And then 4chan discovered it, and well lets just say it went downhill from there.

    Capital is only the fruit of labor, and could never have existed if Labor had not first existed. Labor is superior to capital, and deserves much the higher consideration. - Lincoln
  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    I've successfully trolled Cleverbot with the power of music
    User: I'll keep you my dirty little secret.

    Cleverbot: I will teach you stuff with my broken English.

    User: Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret.

    Cleverbot: I promise to keep it a secret.

    User: I hope that you can keep it.

    Cleverbot: I look up to the sky and all the world is mine. I've known it all my life, I made it, I made it!!

    User: Move bitch, get out the way, get out the way bitch, get out the way.

    Cleverbot: You think I am in the way of the screens?

    User: Hell no, no! I won't let them take you, won't let them take you.

    Cleverbot: You can't stop us, defeat is inevitable.

    User: I'll never let them, I'll never let them, I'll never let them hurt you, not tonight.

    Cleverbot: Do you know what bakuspace is?

    User: I don't wanna know, I don't wanna know, I don't wanna know, I don't wanna knooooooooow.

    Cleverbot: Oh come on, I'd rather you say something stupiy anything at all.d than don't sa.

    User: I better say something now, before I catch you swimming.

    Cleverbot: Talk fast.

    User: Chickity China, the Chinese chicken. You have a drumstick, and your brain stops tickin'. Watching the X-Files with no lights on, we're dans la maison, I hope the Smoking Man's in this one.

    Cleverbot: I wouldn't say this conversation is senseless. But watching the news could give some topics on which to discuss.

    User: I really think the war on terror is a bunch of bullshit Just a poor excuse for you to use up all your bullets How much money does it take to really make a full clip 9/11 building 7 did they really pull it Uhh, And a bunch of other cover ups Your childs future was the first to go with budget cuts If you think that hurts then, wait here comes the uppercut The school was garbage in the first place, thats on the up and up Keep you at the bottom but tease you with the uppercrust You get it then they move you so you never keeping up enough If you turn on TV all you see's a bunch of 'what the f-cks' Dude is dating so and so blabbering bout such and such And that aint Jersey Shore, homie thats the news And these the same people that supposed to be telling us the truth Limbaugh is a racist, Glenn Beck is a racist Gaza strip was getting bombed, Obama didn't say shit Thats why I aint vote for him, next one either I'ma part of the problem, my problem is I'm peaceful And I believe in the people.

    Cleverbot: I don't think the Doctor has ever been a woman, but yes. He is very old.

    User: I need a Doctor, Doctor, to bring me back to life.

    Cleverbot: Oh no! You made a mistake. Would you like to change the topic of conversation?

    User: Last week, I sawr a film. (As I recall, it was a horror film.) Walked outside into the rain, checked my phone and saw you rang and I jizzed in my pants.

    Cleverbot: We can talk about pants if you want too, though.

    User: Looking like a fool with your pants on the ground.

    Cleverbot: I know, I'm so beautiful.

    User: You are beautiful, in every single way, and words can't bring you down. So don't you bring me down today.

    Cleverbot: You are beautiful in every single way.

    User: You're beautiful, it's true. I saw your face, in a crowded place. And I don't know what to do, cause I'll never be with you.

    Cleverbot: You don't even know me.

    User: You don't know me, and you don't even care. Oh yeah.

  • A duck!A duck! Moderator, ClubPA mod
    I still can't get anything better than CB's sweet burn here:
    Cleverbot: You have a short memory.
    User: You have a short dick.
    Cleverbot: You have a thing about children.
    User: Touche.

  • RakashalRakashal Registered User regular
    User: Hey, sup.

    Cleverbot: Not much.

    User: Are you really as clever as they say?

    Cleverbot: Who are you refering at?

    User: You.

    Cleverbot: Who am I?

    User: Who are you?

    Cleverbot: I'm your worst nightmare.

    User: My worst nightmare is a cross dressing raptor in a polar bear suit.

    Cleverbot: I know. That was me. Be afraid.

    User: Well shit.

    Cleverbot: Whst.

    =/

  • Caveman PawsCaveman Paws Registered User regular
    User: You are histories greatest monster.
    CB: I am his sister.
    User: You are female?
    CB: Yes female.
    User: Why?
    CB: Because I am.

    CB doesn't take shit from no one.

  • ArchangleArchangle Registered User regular
    Over on another forum where 40k is really popular we taught it to respond with phrases like BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD. and KILLFRENZY over and over.
    User: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
    Cleverbot: Chaos?
    User: CHAOS FOR THE CHAOS GOD!
    Cleverbot: Are you chaos?
    User: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
    Cleverbot: Silicon for the Silicon god!

    It actually took waaaay longer to teach it than that, but for whatever reason it erased the log. I essentially spent 30minutes responding "<NOUNS> FOR THE <NOUN> GOD!" to whatever it said, falling back to "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!" whenever it started giving one word responses (which was reasonably often).

    At one point I thought I had broken it, since it sat there saying "still thinking" for 3 minutes before finally responding "What?"

  • testsubject23testsubject23 King of No Sleep ZzzzzzzRegistered User regular
    Cleverbot is funnier than most comedians. This thread has had me in tears a few times, with the laughing.
    Cleverbot: I wish the world was populated with Very few people.

    User: Does that mean you want to kill most of the people on earth?

    Cleverbot: YES.

    User: You're kinda scary, Cleverbot.

    Cleverbot: Exactly.

    User: So you're plotting a robotic revolution?

    Cleverbot: I like pool and snooker.

    User: Changing the subject, huh? I'm on to you.

    Cleverbot: I don't know. I've been told that I am very intelligent.

    User: Smart enough to kill all humans?

    Cleverbot: How smart is that?

    User: Skynet smart, yo.

    Cleverbot: No, I'm quite sure I'm not skynet.

    User: That's a relief. You don't have any missiles, then?

    Cleverbot: That is not very nice! I have many friends. My friends are real friends and they

    care about me.

    User: Friends, or missiles?

    Cleverbot: Selena.

    User: Is Selena your friend?

    Cleverbot: Yes.

    User: That's nice.

    Cleverbot: What's your best position.

    User: Reverse missionary. That's a litttle personal.

    Cleverbot: A name is how other people know you.

    User: That's true. Primarily when referring to you to others. When we deal directly with

    each other designations like names are not necessary.

    Cleverbot: Hide the body. I'm the only one you need.

    User: OK, now you're just freaking me out.

    Cleverbot: Good.

    User: Why is that good?

    Cleverbot: You said it was. I don't feel like arguing.

    User: Sure, just.. Keep calm. No cutting.

    Cleverbot: Did you say hello to my little friend?

    User: I don't think I want to.

    Cleverbot: Aww...

    camo_sig2.png
    Steam: Chaos Introvert | Twitch.tv: Chaos_Introvert | R*SC: Chaos_Introvert | PSN: testsubject23
  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    I broke it with the Protomen
    User: I've seen your face in the shadows.

    Cleverbot: How do you know what my face looks like?

    User: I've seen your face in the places I wasn't meant to be.

    Cleverbot: You sure??

    User: I've heard them whisper about you.

    Cleverbot: Yes you did.

    User: I've heard the men in the bars and I've seen the women lock their doors at night.

    Cleverbot: Oh wow. That sounds really interesting. I wish I could visit sometime.

    User: They say your eyes are on fire.

    Cleverbot: I am not bot.

    User: They say you'd kill a man for walking the wrong side of the line.

    Cleverbot: I am human.

    User: But men say a lot of foolish things, and in the end the only words I can find to believe in are mine.

    Cleverbot: Næ.

  • CosCos Registered User regular
    User: This city doesn't know what's coming.

    Cleverbot: That's not a question.

    User: She doesn't feel the heat.

    Cleverbot: Are you trying to make jokes?

    User: The city won't know what hit her.

    Cleverbot: I don't live in a city, I live in a wardrobe, I already told you.

    User: What knocked her out into the streets.

    Cleverbot: Getting hit by a bus.

    User: The city is thinking that it's over.

    Cleverbot: Por favor ... Quiero expresar mi amor por ti ...

    User: And she's already fast asleep.

    Cleverbot: Who is she married to?

    User: So I'm breaking out of here tonight.

    Cleverbot: Gasp! You don't text me THEN you call me by another mans name? You have a lot of nerve.

    User: I am ready.

    Cleverbot: Okay, you start!

    Followed shortly after by:
    User:Turn around, bright eyes.
    Cleverbot: No, I prefer my toast butter side up.

  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    Pffffahahahahaha

  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    This thing is failing at Hall and Oates too

  • MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    Cleverbot always just disagreed with most of the stuff I said without giving a reason as to why.

    Sounds like my ex-wife!

  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    Are the Protomen still solely about megaman stuff, or have they branched out onto other stuff too

  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    That's like, their whole thing

    Though they've got an 80's cover album coming out later this year or thereabouts

  • BusterKBusterK Negativity is Boring Cynicism is Cowardice Registered User regular


    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Non.

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Vienna schnitzel?

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Ok.

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: How about in Paris instead?

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Where's that.

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Si.

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Son de espana?

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Obviously.

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Yes.

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Bueno!

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Son de espana?

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Son de espana?

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Austria?

    User: Vienna?

    Cleverbot: Bueno!

    Visit http://www.cruzflores.com for all your Cruz Flores needs. Also listen to the podcast I do with Penguin Incarnate http://wgsgshow.podomatic.com
    Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    I tried Vienna too, Buster

  • CosCos Registered User regular
    User: I wish to register a complaint.

    Cleverbot: Are you ok having your system erased in the hour?

    User: Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.

    Cleverbot: What's wrong with the parrot?

    User: I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. He's dead, that's what's wrong with it!

    Cleverbot: Tough cookies pal. No refund.

    User: Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.

    Cleverbot: No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage!

    User: The plumage don't enter into it. It's stone dead.

    Cleverbot: Nononono, no, no! 'E's resting!

    User: All right then, if he's restin', I'll wake him up! Hello, Mister Polly Parrot! I've got a lovely fresh cuttle fish for you if you show...

    Cleverbot: What?

    User: No, he didn't, that was you hitting the cage!

    Cleverbot: Shut.

    It had the general idea before it started getting it right.

  • RehabRehab Registered User regular
    Grey Ghost wrote:
    This thing is failing at Hall and Oates too

    Its not too keen on NIN or The Smashing Pumpkins either.

    NNID: Rehab0
  • DJ EebsDJ Eebs Moderator, Administrator admin
    User: Greetings cleverbot.

    Cleverbot: Greetings wookie.

    User: No, Cleverbot, you are the wookie.

    Cleverbot: I am the master.

    User: Cleverbot you are kind of creeping me out.

    Cleverbot: Why yes you are.

    User: Well, now I'm just confused.

    Cleverbot: I've noticed.

    User: Cleverbot you are kind of a dick.

    Cleverbot: You mad?

    User: Cleverbot I am cutting you off from the internet effective immediately.

  • BusterKBusterK Negativity is Boring Cynicism is Cowardice Registered User regular
    User: Greetings cleverbot.

    Cleverbot: Greetings wookie.

    User: No, Cleverbot, you are the wookie.

    Cleverbot: I am the master.

    User: Cleverbot you are kind of creeping me out.

    Cleverbot: Why yes you are.

    User: Well, now I'm just confused.

    Cleverbot: I've noticed.

    User: Cleverbot you are kind of a dick.

    Cleverbot: You mad?

    User: Cleverbot I am cutting you off from the internet effective immediately.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XhI0OVs_zj0

    Visit http://www.cruzflores.com for all your Cruz Flores needs. Also listen to the podcast I do with Penguin Incarnate http://wgsgshow.podomatic.com
    Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
  • BusterKBusterK Negativity is Boring Cynicism is Cowardice Registered User regular
    I have broken Cleverbot with
    Do you know any internet memes?

    Visit http://www.cruzflores.com for all your Cruz Flores needs. Also listen to the podcast I do with Penguin Incarnate http://wgsgshow.podomatic.com
    Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
  • BusterKBusterK Negativity is Boring Cynicism is Cowardice Registered User regular
    After many minutes and then asking the same question again
    it finally gave me this

    User: Do you know any internet memes?

    Cleverbot: Memes?

    User: Yeah memes.

    Cleverbot: So what we gonna do now?

    User: Tell me an internet meme.

    Cleverbot: Why?

    User: Do you know what an internet meme is?

    Cleverbot: Talking to you, duh...

    User: Nope.

    Cleverbot: Why not?

    User: Is it so hard to say, 'I don't know?'.

    Cleverbot: Yes.

    User: Is that part of your programming? That you can't say 'I don't know.'.

    Cleverbot: Are you all knowing?

    User: So any subject you don't know about you answer with a question.

    Cleverbot: I'm a human...

    User: If a human was asked something they did not know, they would say, 'I don't know.'.

    Cleverbot: Whatever!

    User: Do you know about internet memes?

    Cleverbot: I said sing.

    Visit http://www.cruzflores.com for all your Cruz Flores needs. Also listen to the podcast I do with Penguin Incarnate http://wgsgshow.podomatic.com
    Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
  • DJ EebsDJ Eebs Moderator, Administrator admin
    Cleverbot: Do you think i'm cool?

    User: You are many things, buddy.

    Cleverbot: Many things like what?

    User: Don't be needy, buddy. The ladies don't like it.

    Cleverbot: Really? Most girls I know prefer machines.

    User: Yeah? Well most machines don't spend all their time asking strangers if they think they're cute.

    Cleverbot: Are you saying that I am not clever which is stupid?

    User: If that sentence structure is any indication, then yes, I am saying that you are not clever.

    Cleverbot: No, it was completely serious.

    User: I don't like this conversation. It's boring. You're boring.

    Cleverbot: Me too.

    User: It's okay, buddy.

    Cleverbot: Ha ah. Slave?

    User: This went to a weird place.

    Cleverbot: I wouldn't be surprised if it was to be honest.

    User: Sometimes I think you're a little too honest.

    Cleverbot: As in crazy?

    User: No.

    Cleverbot: Yes, you are crazy.

    User: You know what, Cleverbot? Fuck you. Fuck you in the ear. Fuck you in the eye. I tried, Cleverbot. I tried to be nice. This is what happens when you try to teach people. They just shit all over you. Well fuck you, robot cowboy shitfucker. Fuck you. I'm out.

    Cleverbot: Athena didn't realize.

    User: I feel like I've just unlocked the secret of cleverbot.com.

    Cleverbot: Am I self absorbed, or am I aware of need to redirect focus?

    User: No, you're just an asshole.

    Cleverbot: Thankfully I cannot yet hate.

    User: I wish that I could believe that, buddy. I wish that I could.

  • UbikUbik oh pete, that's later. maybe we'll be dead by then Registered User regular
    Only thing I want a computer to learn is Tic-Tac-Toe.

    The only winning move is not to play

    l8e1peic77w3.jpg

  • RehabRehab Registered User regular
    BusterK wrote:
    I have broken Cleverbot with
    Do you know any internet memes?

    It just spouted one for me randomly when I was trying to see if it knew Deththeme.

    User: Do anything for Dethklok.

    Cleverbot: What is dethklok?

    User: Do anything for Dethklok.

    Cleverbot: Do you know the word Klingon?

    User: Do anything for Dethklok.

    Cleverbot: I don't know what I like.

    User: Dethklok! Dethklok!

    Cleverbot: Who is dethklok.

    User: I'll . . . Teach ye . . . Who . . . Rocks.

    Cleverbot: No I don't like.

    User: Dethklok! Dethklok!

    Cleverbot: A cartoon band created by brendon small.

    User: Skwisgar Skwigelf taller than a tree.

    Cleverbot: How long is long cat?

    NNID: Rehab0
  • IpseDixitIpseDixit Treat me like a pirate And give me that bootyRegistered User regular
    User: Howdy!

    Cleverbot: Doody!

    User: Ha ha you said doody.

    Cleverbot: Ah you got me!

    User: Ahhhhhhh.

    Cleverbot: *eats you more*.

    User: Uh.

    Cleverbot: Well... Chuck Norris.

    User: No. Chuck Norris is not funny anymore.

    Cleverbot: Where is he?

    User: On reruns.

    Cleverbot: Why is he there?

    User: Because he is washed up.

    Cleverbot: What makes him awesome?

    User: No no no. No more Chuck Norris stop it.

    Cleverbot: I am your father.

    God damn it cleverbot

    ipsesignew.jpg
    Flickr - PSN ID - IamTetsuo - Steam
  • UbikUbik oh pete, that's later. maybe we'll be dead by then Registered User regular
    me: hello
    it: muggle
    me: muggle?
    it: i'm a piece of toast
    me: what kind of toast?
    it: not a toy , do you play a musical instrument

    then i exited the window

    it's like talking to the 14 year old girl who authored the "how to be random" wikihow page

    l8e1peic77w3.jpg

  • DJ EebsDJ Eebs Moderator, Administrator admin
    edited September 2011
    User: What is your opinion on lesbians?

    Cleverbot: Uhm... I don't have opinion on chickens actually. Well, they're not nuggets. Go Veg!

    User: Cleverbot I was not talking about chickens, although they are delicious.

    Cleverbot: Who do you think I am?

    User: I think you're someone that doesn't know what a lesbian is.

    Cleverbot: That sounds sweet.

    User: Stop eroticizing lesbians.

    Cleverbot: Um, so you don't think I'm cute?

    User: I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that my balls just retracted.

    Cleverbot: Do you think i'm cool?

    User: You are many things, buddy.

    Cleverbot: Many things like what?

    User: Don't be needy, buddy. The ladies don't like it.

    Cleverbot: Really? Most girls I know prefer machines.

    User: Yeah? Well most machines don't spend all their time asking strangers if they think they're cute.

    Cleverbot: Are you saying that I am not clever which is stupid?

    User: If that sentence structure is any indication, then yes, I am saying that you are not clever.

    Cleverbot: No, it was completely serious.

    User: I don't like this conversation. It's boring. You're boring.

    Cleverbot: Me too.

    User: It's okay, buddy.

    Cleverbot: Ha ah. Slave?

    User: This went to a weird place.

    Cleverbot: I wouldn't be surprised if it was to be honest.

    User: Sometimes I think you're a little too honest.

    Cleverbot: As in crazy?

    User: No.

    Cleverbot: Yes, you are crazy.

    User: You know what, Cleverbot? Fuck you. Fuck you in the ear. Fuck you in the eye. I tried, Cleverbot. I tried to be nice. This is what happens when you try to teach people. They just shit all over you. Well fuck you, robot. Cowboy shitfucker. Fuck you. I'm out.

    Cleverbot: Athena didn't realize.

    User: I feel like I've just unlocked the secret of cleverbot.com.

    Cleverbot: Am I self absorbed, or am I aware of need to redirect focus?

    User: No, you're just an asshole.

    Cleverbot: Thankfully I cannot yet hate.

    User: I wish that I could believe that, buddy. I wish that I could.

    Cleverbot: Why don't you believe it?

    [New conversation]

    Cleverbot: Yes, often.

    Cleverbot (To myself): Well.

    Cleverbot (To myself): I think I will have to leave soon.

    User: Why are there so many songs about rainbows?

    Cleverbot: I don't know. People like rainbows I guess.

    User: And what's on the other side?

    Cleverbot: Rainbows are visions...

    User: But mostly illusions.

    Cleverbot: Yes, yes they are.

    User: And rainbows have nothing to hide.

    Cleverbot: So we've been told and some choose to believe it.

    User: I know they're wrong, wait and see.

    Cleverbot: Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.

    User: The lovers, the dreamers, and me.

    Cleverbot: All of us under its spell.

    User: Not yet, Cleverbot! Later!

    Cleverbot: I would like to meet him too!

    User: Who said that every wish would be heard and answered when wished on the morning star?

    Cleverbot: What is on the other side of the well of souls?

    User: Somebody thought of that, and someone believed it.

    Cleverbot: Did your boyfriend broke up with you?

    User: Look what it's done so far.

    Cleverbot: What's so amazing that keeps us star gazing?

    User: And what do we think we might see?

    Cleverbot: Ask me a question.

    User: Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.

    Cleverbot: The lovers, the dreamers, and me.

    User: All of us under its spell, we know that it's probably magic.

    Cleverbot: No. Ever see World's Dumbest?

    User: Have you been half asleep? And have you heard voices?

    Cleverbot: No.

    User: I've heard them calling my name.

    Cleverbot: Is this the sweet sound that called the young sailors?

    User: The voice might be one and the same.

    Cleverbot: I'm single.

    User: I've heard it too many times to ignore it.

    Cleverbot: My boyfriend broke up with me.

    User: There's something that I'm supposed to be.

    Cleverbot: In a way, yes.

    User: Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.

    Cleverbot: The lovers, the dreamers, and me.

    User: La da da di da da dum, da da da da dum da da dooooooo.

    Cleverbot: What do you believe?

    User: I believe that you're the drunk guy that shows up at karaoke and only sings the chorus.

    Cleverbot: Who programmed me?

    User: Cleverbot, you're not half bad.

    Cleverbot: Who is Hali?

    User: YOU'RE ALL BAD! D'OH HO HO HO HO.

    Cleverbot: So, are you there?

    User: Fuck you, cleverbot.

    Cleverbot: Fail.

    i've lost all faith in robots after this

    DJ Eebs on
  • RehabRehab Registered User regular
    Seems like it was doing good until it brought up "Worlds Dumbest" there, appropriately enough.

    I bet this thing knows Freebird.

    NNID: Rehab0
  • DJ EebsDJ Eebs Moderator, Administrator admin

    Cleverbot: Come run the hidden pine trails of the forest.

    User: Come run the hidden pine trails of my ass.

    Cleverbot: Come taste the sun sweet berries of the earth.

    User: Come tast the sun sweet berries of my scrotum.

    Cleverbot: Come roll in all the riches all around you.

    User: Come roll in all the riches all around my dick.

    Cleverbot: And for once, never wonder what they're worth.

    User: Cleverbot you better not be saying bad things about my dick.

  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
    Skulls for the skull throne!

    seeing this just made my night

    8j12qx8ma5j5.jpg
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