America what is the clitoris?

crwth

Futore wrote:

ever wish you had two dicks? I do. I know you do. The real question is:

how would you have them oriented on your bod?

eye dicks

Clint Eastwood

Today I banged London Keyes up the ass. She just recently started doing anal and I felt very special to be one of the few dudes chosen to bang her butthole. I also edited some BurningAngel porn. I got our big boob movie ready and my movie called No Panties Allowed 3. I really feel like I nailed in how much I dislike panties in this one. Seriously… Fuck panties… and pants …. and cupcakes!!!!!!

here is London with my jiz on her face

Futore

You two are crazy.

Anti, you haven't seen me wield this dil

Crwth knows what's up. The only problem, crwth, is how you would have to position your head in order to DP, ya know?

Garlic Bread

Futore wrote:

ever wish you had two dicks? I do. I know you do. The real question is:

how would you have them oriented on your bod?

wolverine claws

Antimatter

Futore wrote:

Anti, you haven't seen me wield this dil

for which i gently praise mother mary every day

Aphostile

From my experience, most girls don't want both things moving at the same time in a DP scenario.

crwth

Futore wrote:

You two are crazy.

Anti, you haven't seen me wield this dil

Crwth knows what's up. The only problem, crwth, is how you would have to position your head in order to DP, ya know?

one eye for the vagina and one for the booter

Garlic Bread

are we talking DP as in one in the vagina one in the anus

or two in the vagina or two in the anus

Futore

crwth wrote:

Futore wrote:

You two are crazy.

Anti, you haven't seen me wield this dil

Crwth knows what's up. The only problem, crwth, is how you would have to position your head in order to DP, ya know?

one eye for the vagina and one for the booter

well yeah, but your eyes go east to west and her holes go north to south.

she would have to do some sort of splits scenario that would get a little complicated. If you had a couple nice longitudinal boners, then we'd be in business.

Here, give me a minute and I will find the paper that N.D. Tyson wrote on the situation

crwth

no see you have the girl lie on her side and then you look into her butt and vagina like a pair of dick binoculars

Futore

ohhhhh, okay with like both of her legs bunched up on one side?

like you're supposed to be spooning but then you are just looking directly into life itself

crwth

exactly

Futore

daaaaaaang crwth. wtb, dude. friggin double dick wizzard

Beasteh

wizzard cum blizzard

Aphostile

Duuuuuummmmmbbbbbb.

crwth

whoa man

Futore

Apho, stop being lame about that double dick technology

Tasteticle

When I was a child, my parents sat me down to have "the talk"

Since I was about 8 at the time, it sounded like the most horrific thing in the world to me

At the end of it all, I was sitting there, wringing my tiny little hands thinking 'how could anyone...DO...this??'

My father then placed his hand upon my shoulder and looked me dead in the face and said

'REMEMBER THIS FACE WHEN YOU HAVE SEX'

It HORRIFIED me

and you know what

it totally fucking worked

First time inside a chick and BAM all I can see is my dads stern look

basically he had managed to set up a cockblock 8 years in advance

Speed Racer

I never got the talk

I learned about sex from the older kid that lived next door and later from the internet

and also from seinfeld

one time I asked my mom about it and she started to explain and I offered some random piece of information I had from one of these sources and she said "see you already know about this" and left the room

For a long time I used to think that a vagina was some kind of coarse strip of skin like a beaver tail you you kinda rubbed your dick against and then it would porously absorb the semen

Futore

Speed Racer wrote:

For a long time I used to think that a vagina was some kind of coarse strip of skin like a beaver tail you you kinda rubbed your dick against and then it would porously absorb the semen

There is a name for this sexual act but I forget what it's called

Tasteticle

Futore wrote:

Speed Racer wrote:

For a long time I used to think that a vagina was some kind of coarse strip of skin like a beaver tail you you kinda rubbed your dick against and then it would porously absorb the semen

There is a name for this sexual act but I forget what it's called

Scabbing

Beasteh

my dad sat me down and said son you're at the age where you'll start noticing YEP OK I KNOW DAD THANKS CYA

Taya

My mom gave me a book about sex and puberty but the book didn't have any more information than what we had learned in Health class.

crwth

i'm pretty sure i just learned in health class

and my mom too i guess

i have a drawer full of condoms thanks to her

Mizuumi

Speed Racer wrote:

For a long time I used to think that a vagina was some kind of coarse strip of skin like a beaver tail you you kinda rubbed your dick against and then it would porously absorb the semen

this is amazing



also my parents never taught me nuthin' 'bout sex


and just looked what happened to me *proceeds to shove hand up butt*

Futore

Tasteticle wrote:

Futore wrote:

Speed Racer wrote:

For a long time I used to think that a vagina was some kind of coarse strip of skin like a beaver tail you you kinda rubbed your dick against and then it would porously absorb the semen

There is a name for this sexual act but I forget what it's called

Scabbing

Noooo I don't think so....

Beasteh

then i brought a girl home while he was away and we did it in his bed because it is a double bed

The Lovely Bastard

I learned about sex from the Spice channel

The scrambling didn't really work right so you could see pretty much everything, only the people were purple with green hair and eyes

Imagine my surprise when I found out that, most of the time, pubes do not look like the Hulk's

Beasteh

i always have a condom in my wallet 'just in case'

it is 2 years old

8->

BusterK

I kind of miss the Spice Channel actually

Rogue Lemon

I don't think I know anyone who actually got 'the talk.' They took care of that shit by the end of 5th grade public school around here.
And even then I had that smart older girl and her sister down the street to play Doctor with well before that.

Man, I just realized that is probably the closest I will ever get to a threesome.

Beef Avenger

ok this James Deen Blog is amazing

that dude enjoys his work

crwth

Beasteh wrote:

i always have a condom in my wallet 'just in case'

it is 2 years old

8->

you should probably get a new one!

Nerdgasmic

Beasteh wrote:

then i brought a girl home while he was away and we did it in his bed because it is a double bed

dang, man, that's cold


also, yeah, condoms go bad

Muse Among Men

I don't know how I learned anything (certainly not my parents), and I was generally correct too. And I guess at some point some of the schoolgirls found out I had correct information, so they would ask me questions. And if I knew I would tell them, if I didn't I wouldn't. But generally all they wanted to know where if certain myths were true, particularly pregnancy/conception myths. It was kind of sad.

"Soda doesn't kill sperm. Just use the friggin' condoms."

"But I heard-"

"No, just no."

And once, a friend of mine, looked up from her CosmoGirl asking me to clarify something and I had to effectively give her the birds and the bees talk. Had she been absent all of sex-ed, which was actually good? She was 17.

Futore

and wallet is one of the worst places to continuously keep a condom. probably second to glove compartment in your car

Tallahasseeriel

You know what sucks? Anorgasmia.

Sterica

Keep a sheep handy if you ever need a fresh condom.

Speed Racer

the only conception myth I remember is kids in middle school thought that if you had sex in a pool then the chlorine would kill all the sperm

Beasteh

last time i used a condom it was too small

*heh*