what do you live for?

Crowbawt

That's why I appreciate my mom so much. It's like she took the choice out of my hands.

I mean yeah, it's dumb and there's nothing actually stopping me from breaking the promise, but it's like another barrier I'd have to cross.

Stale

Rorus Raz wrote:

Stale wrote:

Metzger Meister wrote:

Rorus Raz wrote:

Man, I've never had serious suicidal thoughts.

That's gotta be a bad spot to be in

and once you seriously consider the option, it will never. ever. leave your head.

very, very true. It's like a tumor you can never totally cut out.

Well that is something. I'm sure everyone has had low points with tons of bullshit in their lives and feel like it'd be best to just jump off a bridge that sort all of that out. But it's, I dunno, not really a serious consideration and you're just fatigued. I always imagined a serious consideration would be much different.

it is very different, and it never leaves you after that.

it's not that you always want to kill yourself. It's just that in the back of your mind, anytime things start getting tough, that little whining voice is there, reminding you. and that's the worst part.

you know that voice is you.

DirtyDirtyVagrant

I've never heard it described that way, but it's so true.

Baroque And Roll

Stale wrote:

[it is very different, and it never leaves you after that.

it's not that you always want to kill yourself. It's just that in the back of your mind, anytime things start getting tough, that little whining voice is there, reminding you. and that's the worst part.

you know that voice is you.

This is real talk. First time it happened to me was about two years ago. And it fucking haunts you, man. And it's not even that hard to visualize.

Got some sleeping pills? Alcohol? Bam, game over.

This is the piece of you that you will never be able to silence.

BYToady

Got bleach and ammonia in your house? Just huff that like you had a head cold and a steaming bowl of water. Won't take long for your lungs to melt. People do it to themselves accidentally every year.

Matey

I had my first serious consideration when I was 5

At this point it's just an option I weigh every morning

Still got more life to live? Yes? Carry on.

Rorus Raz

This thread went to a dark place

Matey

I think given the nature of the question it was kinda natural for it to dip into this territory

ceres

Grandparents, for me. If I killed myself it would destroy my mother. And so I don't. When I get upset I get reckless more than anything else. It would have to be an accident, or at least look pretty convincingly like one.

I really only focus on it when I'm pretty far down, but I have to say it's something that's always there. "It would be so easy..." and so forth.

edit: Okay fine, and two other people probably wouldn't take it so great either.

Rorus Raz

The best way to counter that is to consider how easy living is. Just remember to feed and water yourself daily.

BYToady

I wouldn't ceres, I'd be pretty cross with you.

Rorus Raz

I'd be pretty sad if I heard that anyone here killed themselves. Even you, ceres.

Tonkka

Don't worry everyone, I'm not going anywhere.

Ever.

Munkus Beaver

Stale wrote:

Munkus Beaver wrote:

I live because I am stubborn.

I live because I'm not done yet.

When I finally give up, I imagine I'll just collapse into dust. Like a vampire.

I just don't have anything better to do than spite the world.

Rorus Raz

To be fair, the world has it coming.

ThreeCubed

My mom and sister always get me through the dark hours. I couldn't leave them. Everyone else would be fine after some time, but I know they wouldn't be.

In the not-so-dark times? Well... I dunno. I've been pondering that more and more lately. I've been trying to find something to live for, to make my life have some meaning. Somedays I feel like I want my life to leave a mark on others. I want to make a difference. This drives me to work extremely long hours, seek out others in need, or get motivated to CHANGE ALL THE THINGS.

Others days, I get nihilistic, remember that no one expects anything of me and that I'm just a single cog in this giant human clockwork machine. On those days, I go into work from 9am-5pm, do a decent enough job, and come home to veg out to Dragon Ball Z on bluray for the rest of the evening.

I try not to let that happen too often.

I'm watching DBZ RIGHT NOW you guys.

BusterK

Life is full of so much crazy awesome shit that you never would have expected or planned for.
I know it can get shitty
Real shitty
So shitty you start to think it will always be shitty
But then another day comes and guess what?
You can't tell the future
Your life, given enough time, is going to have even worse moments
And also moments that are so incredible you could never ask for them because they blow the shit out of your wildest imagination

I was thinking about this because I was thinking about deals with the devil
Which suicide kind of reminds me of
Choosing terrible certainty instead of not knowing what will happen
But certainty, no matter what you ask for, even if it's the best thing in the world
Is a suckers bet
It kills hope
You think of the most successful people in the world
In whatever criteria you could think of
If you could go to them in the past and ask them for the best future they could imagine for themselves
They'd probably sell themselves short
I know the odds are against you
But you can't know for sure unless you find out
Life is a sucker's bet
But only a sucker can win

BYToady

I get through my low phases by reminding myself that by next month I'm gonna be happy again. Like clockwork.

Matey

@ceres

For whatever it's worth

From what I've read over the years and listening to others opinions of you

The world is a better place for your existence

I think sometimes people don't hear that enough

Just thought I'd let you know

Orikaeshigitae

Matey wrote:

I think given the nature of the question it was kinda natural for it to dip into this territory

i was hoping it would stay upbeat, but i suppose i could have phrased it better.

@ceres. you know i'd notice.

BusterK

Reasons to live

1. Chocolate Chip Cookies
2. Chocolate Malted Milkshakes
3. Waffles on a Sunday morning
4. Driving down the open road with your favorite song blasting through the speakers
5. New Batman movie
6. Movies in the future are not just going to be 3D, the seats are going to move along with action scenes in a movie, like a roller coaster
7. Telling a joke and someone starts laughing so hard they look like they're gonna die and you caused that
8. That moment when no one knows how to solve a problem and suddenly you have the answer
9. There's a good chance your favorite song of all time hasn't even been written yet
10. There's at the very least, one person out there, even if you haven't met them yet, who could love you so much that even being apart from you for a few hours hurts them in their soul
11. Star Wars: The Old Republic
12. New Star Tours ride at Disneyland

Druhim

fuck that, I don't even care for 3d movies
don't want my seat to move around to clumsily simulate moving through the world of the movie

Rorus Raz

They already do that at theme parks

Who remember Star Wars: The Ride?

Kuribo's Shoe

did somebody say D-Box

Druhim

Rorus Raz wrote: »

They already do that at theme parks

Who remember Star Wars: The Ride?

yeah, and I'm saying I don't want that shit

BusterK

Kuribo's Shoe wrote:

did somebody say D-Box

Yes, I wanted to go to a Harry Potter showing with that but the opportunity came and went

Kuribo's Shoe

BusterK

Kuribo's Shoe wrote:

God, I wish I could have been alive when this first came out

How can anyone not just want to live forever
But forever in the past too
Everywhere you turn there's awesome shit like getting your butt zapped while watching a B movie

Kuribo's Shoe

Vincent Price wants to give YOU the Tingler.

Matey

I wish Vincent Price would give me the Tingler

godmode

Tam wrote:

I genuinely don't know any more

If it's any consolation, your art is truly a delight.

Futore

Stale wrote:

I live for that blissful quasi-orgasmic look on a person's face when they bite into something I made and it's so good. I love to feed people, and little else brings me as much pleasure.

I'm the same way with cocktails. I love making good drinks for friends and talking them through it and damn it's just so great.

Cocktails and pleasuring someone. But more consistently, cocktails

Kuribo's Shoe

Margarazzi wrote:

I'm watching DBZ RIGHT NOW you guys.

I'm Kuribo's Shoe, and I approve this message.

Tox

ceres wrote:

Grandparents, for me. If I killed myself it would destroy my mother. And so I don't. When I get upset I get reckless more than anything else. It would have to be an accident, or at least look pretty convincingly like one.

I really only focus on it when I'm pretty far down, but I have to say it's something that's always there. "It would be so easy..." and so forth.

edit: Okay fine, and two other people probably wouldn't take it so great either.

I was the same way. Even when I was at my worst, I was too worried about what it would do to my mother.

Tommy2Hands

Just got back from a marching band competition

gotta say, having your score announced and being only 2 points below sweepstakes is pretty exciting

too bad our color guard dragged our score down like whoa

Tox

And with that, I'm going to get some sleep.

MetroidZoid

I came here to say how I live for taking care of plants and living things (mostly plants, because I don't have the time or resources to take care of a bunch of adopted animals as much as I want to). Something about growing, tending, raising, and spreading all that work to friends and family. It was the highlight of my summer to grow so many tomatoes and potatoes and peppers and peas that I was looking for people to give them too. Food bank one week, a family I knew the next. Best feeling.

But the other thing I live for, and I've only really acknowledged this and embraced it lately, is to enjoy life. See the humor in things. Help people out when they need it, be there for them when they do. It keeps me from getting depressed, especially as horrible humanity can seem at times.

The Lovely Bastard

I have been to a screening of The Tingler with the proper seating

It was amazing

I love William Castle

Also I have no idea what I live for

I just ain't wanna be dead yet

Rorus Raz

I live for the users

Antimatter

i believed in users once before