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Aliens: How do I get out of this chickenshit outfit?

DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
edited December 2011 in Social Entropy++
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That's right, I'm talking about one of the classic, best goddamn action films ever made. I ain't saying it's the best, there's some powerhouses to contend with, but this flick is a classic blockbuster action flick through and through. If you don't like this film, don't even talk to me son. You have issues.

Now there's bound to be some a yous who ain't seen this yet for some god forsaken bullshit reason, so let me break down the key players for you.

First and foremost, we have Ellen Ripley (Sigourney Weaver):
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Oh, wait. Wrong flick god dammit.
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There we go. Ellen Ripley is the level headed, ballsy former warrant officer of the industrial ship Nostromo and also the only survivor from the initial contact with the alien (or xenomorph if you prefer) from the first film, Alien. She's not superhuman, but she is stubborn, intelligent, resourceful, and the key protagonist of the film. She's not invincible, she's just determined to stop the alien species from getting back to earth even if it kills her.

The other primary players-

Sergeant Al Apone(Al Matthews), squad leader of the Colonial Marines team sent with Ripley to investigate planet LV-426.
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Apone's one of the good guys. No-nonsense, a solid leader. Too bad he doesn't make it.

Then there's Lieutenant William Gorman (William Hope).
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Ostensibly the real leader of the mission, it become clear very quickly that he has no real combat experience and is fucking useless as well as having a stick up his ass. He redeems himself a little when he dies.

Next up is Bishop (Lance Henriksen). He's just Bishop because he's an android.
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Initially Ripley's very mistrustful of Bishop because of what happened in the first film with the Nostromo's android. He may be a machine, but he's one of the good guys also.

This is Carter J. Burke(Paul Reiser), a special projects director from Weyland Yutani, the corporation that's funding this mission and is also the corporation that founded the colony on LV-426.
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Burke is basically a slimy shitfuck that everyone loves to hate. It becomes evident early on that he's a spineless sleazebag, but you don't realize just how much of a sleaze he is until late in the film. He has no redeeming moments in the film aside from dying to the aliens.

Next we have Rebecca "Newt" Jorden (Carrie Henn).
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She's the only surviving colonist, which Ripley really connects with. She's managed to survive on her own by hiding from the aliens until the Sulaco arrives. Ripley is determined to save her from this cluster fuck.


Private William Hudson (Bill Paxton) is the team's tech expert and a smart ass.
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He's cocky and brash and kind of a fuck up. He initially cracks under pressure, but when the chips are really down he stands and fights bravely to the end.

Corporal Dwayne Hicks (Michael Biehn) takes over leadership of the squad when Apone is captured by the aliens.
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He's smarter than most of the squad and actually respects and listens to Ripley once he's leading the squad. Definitely one of the good guys, and one of the few survivors at the end.

Then we have the smack talking smartgun wielding comedy duo of Private Mark Drake (Mark Rolston) and Private Jenette Vasquez (Jenette Goldstein).


Seriously, this flick is solid from start to finish. Excellently paced. Bad guys you love to hate. A pitiless, relentless enemy. Great, quotable lines. And Sigourney being a bad ass.

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Posts

  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    I would like Vasquez to bench press me.

    Illustration Portfolio: cajsimpson.com
  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    Ripley is the best

    “Hic non defectus est, sed cattus minxit desuper nocte quadam. Confundatur pessimus cattus qui minxit super librum istum in nocte Daventrie, et consimiliter omnes alii propter illum. Et cavendum valde ne permittantur libri aperti per noctem ubi cattie venire possunt.”
    Site | The Miami Grindstone | Twitter | Dropbox
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    I just love how she can see that she's surrounded by knuckleheads that don't really get what's happening, but she knows she needs to stop these things at any cost.

    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    Seriously, I cannot think of another action movie heroine that actually manages to be strong and female rather than a man with boobs

    “Hic non defectus est, sed cattus minxit desuper nocte quadam. Confundatur pessimus cattus qui minxit super librum istum in nocte Daventrie, et consimiliter omnes alii propter illum. Et cavendum valde ne permittantur libri aperti per noctem ubi cattie venire possunt.”
    Site | The Miami Grindstone | Twitter | Dropbox
  • UsagiUsagi WOMP WOMPRegistered User regular
    Quoth wrote:
    Ripley is the best

    You heard it here first, folks.
    Putting your finger in someone's butthole.
    Basically the same as flowers.
  • Sars_BoySars_Boy Registered User regular
    you realize this is going to turn into a Prometheus thread in 24 hours, yes?

  • BusterKBusterK Negativity is Boring Cynicism is Cowardice Registered User regular
    I like that this movie actually has characters you enjoy watching
    Makes me hate the third movie even more for killing them

    Visit http://www.cruzflores.com for all your Cruz Flores needs. Also listen to the podcast I do with Penguin Incarnate http://wgsgshow.podomatic.com
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  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    BusterK wrote:
    I like that this movie actually has characters you enjoy watching
    Makes me hate the third movie even more for killing them

    And so casually, too

    It was like "hey so we know you really liked that last movie but haha screw you"

    “Hic non defectus est, sed cattus minxit desuper nocte quadam. Confundatur pessimus cattus qui minxit super librum istum in nocte Daventrie, et consimiliter omnes alii propter illum. Et cavendum valde ne permittantur libri aperti per noctem ubi cattie venire possunt.”
    Site | The Miami Grindstone | Twitter | Dropbox
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Quoth wrote: »
    Seriously, I cannot think of another action movie heroine that actually manages to be strong and female rather than a man with boobs

    Yes!

    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    The third movie basically ruined her character by sticking her in an asinine situation deliberately crafted to prod a bunch of buttons

    “Hic non defectus est, sed cattus minxit desuper nocte quadam. Confundatur pessimus cattus qui minxit super librum istum in nocte Daventrie, et consimiliter omnes alii propter illum. Et cavendum valde ne permittantur libri aperti per noctem ubi cattie venire possunt.”
    Site | The Miami Grindstone | Twitter | Dropbox
  • PaperLuigi44PaperLuigi44 I believe they disproved that on Mythbusters... Registered User regular
    Oh hello, thread to one of the best movies ever

    Even if it's been a while since I've this movie, Burke's sleazy dealings were the first thing I remembered

    Fuck that guy

  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    Let's surround her with criminals! All men! How many times can she be threatened with rape or something? I don't know, but everyone knows that rape makes women stronger

    “Hic non defectus est, sed cattus minxit desuper nocte quadam. Confundatur pessimus cattus qui minxit super librum istum in nocte Daventrie, et consimiliter omnes alii propter illum. Et cavendum valde ne permittantur libri aperti per noctem ubi cattie venire possunt.”
    Site | The Miami Grindstone | Twitter | Dropbox
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades His love is a prize Rantin' and RavenRegistered User regular
    I've been playing Infestation the last few days and while the story is shit, it's still a hell of a lot of fun

    Also I am unaware of any Alien movies past the James Cameron flick

    ElJeffe wrote: »
    I get by on the knowledge that I'm not going to spend a whole lot of time mucking about inside of my asshole anyway
  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    Quoth wrote:
    The third movie basically ruined her character by sticking her in an asinine situation deliberately crafted to prod a bunch of buttons

    I've still never seen the director's cut. Kinda curious what the original state of that movie was.

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  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    I did not know there was a directors cut but I want to think it wasn't a total mess at some point

    “Hic non defectus est, sed cattus minxit desuper nocte quadam. Confundatur pessimus cattus qui minxit super librum istum in nocte Daventrie, et consimiliter omnes alii propter illum. Et cavendum valde ne permittantur libri aperti per noctem ubi cattie venire possunt.”
    Site | The Miami Grindstone | Twitter | Dropbox
  • UsagiUsagi WOMP WOMPRegistered User regular
    So now the important question: why don't I already own Alien/s?

    Dangit self, get with the program!

    You heard it here first, folks.
    Putting your finger in someone's butthole.
    Basically the same as flowers.
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades His love is a prize Rantin' and RavenRegistered User regular
    Usagi wrote:
    So now the important question: why don't I already own Alien/s?

    Dangit self, get with the program!

    I blame Druhim

    ElJeffe wrote: »
    I get by on the knowledge that I'm not going to spend a whole lot of time mucking about inside of my asshole anyway
  • UsagiUsagi WOMP WOMPRegistered User regular
    Sounds legitimate

    (also psst josh I mailed a thing to your wife yesterday :o)

    You heard it here first, folks.
    Putting your finger in someone's butthole.
    Basically the same as flowers.
  • chiasaur11chiasaur11 Never doubt a raccoon. Registered User regular
    Quoth wrote:
    I did not know there was a directors cut but I want to think it wasn't a total mess at some point

    Heh.

    That's the thing. Alien 3? It went through, roughly, a jillion iterations, in totally different directions, with versions by William Gibson that cut Ripley to a minimum when it looked like Weaver wouldn't play ball, versions by David Twohy and Eric Red that killed everyone even more casually, trailers that implied the flick would be set on Earth...

    Not the smoothest development process.

    Meanwhile, Aliens is borderline perfect. Fun fact: They shot the scenes with all the marines together last, to ensure the easy interactions among the cast would feel authentic.

    2MyOx.png
  • Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood Living In Fear. Year Of The Tiger.Registered User regular
    one of the best james cameron movies. i prefer T2 but hey, why bother picking favorites. this movie kicks ass.

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  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus One day I will kill a god.Registered User regular
    I have never seen this movie

  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Usagi wrote:
    So now the important question: why don't I already own Alien/s?

    Dangit self, get with the program!

    I blame Druhim

    KT5d0.jpg

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  • Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood Living In Fear. Year Of The Tiger.Registered User regular
    I have never seen this movie

    c'mon son

    AEKTl9K.png
  • CorporateLogoCorporateLogo Cream of my compulsions Rising to the tip of the spoutRegistered User regular
    edited December 2011
    A man that loves Speed Racer and Scott Pilgrim has never seen Aliens

    I for one am shocked at this

    CorporateLogo on
    Do not have a cow, mortal.

    3DS: 2251-4432-9039

    c9PXgFo.jpg
  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    Druhim wrote:
    This is Carter J. Burke(Paul Reiser), a special projects director from Weyland Yutani, the corporation that's funding this mission and is also the corporation that founded the colony on LV-426.
    jmVzU.jpg
    Burke is basically a slimy shitfuck that everyone loves to hate. It becomes evident early on that he's a spineless sleazebag, but you don't realize just how much of a sleaze he is until late in the film. He has no redeeming moments in the film aside from dying to the aliens.

    Not a big Paul Reiser fan in general, but he was excellent as a sleazy fucker in this.

    nevillexmassig1.png
  • AntimatterAntimatter if you want to talk to me look elsewhere.Registered User regular
    haven't seen this movie either

    OP spoiled deaths for me

  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Antimatter wrote: »
    haven't seen this movie either

    OP spoiled deaths for me

    25 year old film. Not my fault you haven't bothered to see a classic.

    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • Day of the BearDay of the Bear The Qun demandsRegistered User regular
    Anti I tried to get you to watch these!

    m6eoUgQ.jpg
  • AntimatterAntimatter if you want to talk to me look elsewhere.Registered User regular
    there isn't a statute of limitations on spoilers

  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus One day I will kill a god.Registered User regular
    A man that loves Speed Racer and Scott Pilgrim has never seen Aliens

    I for one am shocked at this

    I don't understand the connection you think you're making

  • MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius Registered User regular
    I should see these one of these days

    If that's all there is my friends, then let's keep dancing
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    At least it led off with the death of a black man in a science fiction movie, the most predictable thing since the kids getting high dying in a Jason movie.

    Steam name: munkus
    Pokemon X ID:
    Please give to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America: http://www.ccfa.org/
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Antimatter wrote: »
    there isn't a statute of limitations on spoilers

    brailledealwit.gif

    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • FCDFCD Registered User regular
    Quoth wrote:
    BusterK wrote:
    I like that this movie actually has characters you enjoy watching
    Makes me hate the third movie even more for killing them

    And so casually, too

    It was like "hey so we know you really liked that last movie but haha screw you"

    As far as I'm concerned, everyone who survived Aliens walked off into the sunset and lived happily ever after. Anything supposedly set afterwards was just an insane VR simulation created by Weyland-Yutani because they are evil. The End.

    "If anyone tried to steal your WAX LIPS, you would eat their eyeballs and deliver an angry lecture into their empty sockets." Hearts Boxcars, The Midnight Crew
  • chromdomchromdom That Guy Tiny town south of the cool cityRegistered User regular
    I have always maintained that this movie is inferior in everyway to the original masterpiece, Alien.
    Alien was suspenseful, shocking, and frighteningly realistic in its depiction of the future.
    Aliens was just loud.

    Yeah, I said it! Whatchu gonna do about it?

    Darmak wrote: »
    You haven't lived until you've fucked a hole in the ground till you died.
  • AntimatterAntimatter if you want to talk to me look elsewhere.Registered User regular
    Druhim wrote:
    Antimatter wrote: »
    there isn't a statute of limitations on spoilers

    brailledealwit.gif

    transformer-deal-with-it.gif

  • ForarForar #432 Already prepping for Toronto Fan Expo!Registered User regular
    Antimatter wrote: »
    there isn't a statute of limitations on spoilers

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    Aliens is the only movie I've ever bought three times; VHS, DVD and iTunes.

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  • Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood Living In Fear. Year Of The Tiger.Registered User regular
    chromdom wrote:
    I have always maintained that this movie is inferior in everyway to the original masterpiece, Alien.
    Alien was suspenseful, shocking, and frighteningly realistic in its depiction of the future.
    Aliens was just loud.

    Yeah, I said it! Whatchu gonna do about it?
    they're two entirely different types of movies and you should not compare them in any way.

    AEKTl9K.png
  • chiasaur11chiasaur11 Never doubt a raccoon. Registered User regular
    chromdom wrote:
    I have always maintained that this movie is inferior in everyway to the original masterpiece, Alien.
    Alien was suspenseful, shocking, and frighteningly realistic in its depiction of the future.
    Aliens was just loud.

    Yeah, I said it! Whatchu gonna do about it?

    I say we grease this rat-fuck son-of-a-bitch right now!

    2MyOx.png
  • Day of the BearDay of the Bear The Qun demandsRegistered User regular
    chromdom wrote:
    I have always maintained that this movie is inferior in everyway to the original masterpiece, Alien.
    Alien was suspenseful, shocking, and frighteningly realistic in its depiction of the future.
    Aliens was just loud.

    Yeah, I said it! Whatchu gonna do about it?
    they're two entirely different types of movies and you should not compare them in any way.

    Bingo

    m6eoUgQ.jpg
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