This is the [chat] of Captain Jack Sparrow

Feral

This is the [chat] of unlikely animal friendships CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW!



THIS IS THE TALE

Old OP:

Spoiler:

Such as a kitten & a deer:


Deer & dog:


Dog & elephant:



Elephant & sheep:



Polar bears & dogs:



Cat & bunny:

Ryadic

Christians are the worst, according to Elki. I agree.

japan

The daily mash has been on some seriously good form lately

The Daily Mash wrote:

Mail becomes cause of and solution to racism
THE Daily Mail has today launched a five year plan to prevent exactly as much racism as it creates.

In the wake of the Stephen Lawrence verdict the paper has realised that it can now have a completely neutral effect on British society.

Editor Paul Dacre said: "For every 100 stories about the terrifying brown-faced demons who stalk your town and the sickening number of DVDs they can hire every month from LoveFilm, we will run a photograph of one of Stephen Lawrence's unconvicted killers with the word 'murderer' in huge capital letters.

"As long as I cannot be stopped then by 2017 Britain will be 50 per cent racist and 50 percent anti-racist. Our society will have achieved the perfect balance. I thank you."

Philosophy consultant Julian Cook said: "The Daily Mail is the yin and the yang.

"It is fire and ice. It is the darkness and the light. It is an endless vortex of inseparable cause and effect for they are both truly one entity in the same conscious and infinite universe.

"What the bloody fuck is going on?"

But Mail reader Helen Archer, from Stevenage, said: "So if the overall effect of the Mail is now neutral then wouldn't it be easier just to shut it down and stop wasting all those trees?"

It is understood that Mrs Archer's photograph will be featured on the front page of the Daily Mail tomorrow under the headline 'MURDERER!'.

Meanwhile, Britain is on tenterhooks as it waits for something called a 'Rod Liddle' to issue its nauseatingly weasel-worded justification for attacking the conviction of racist killers.

Tom Logan, from Hatfield, said: "I have my deckchair, I have my bucket. Proceed."

EDIT: Piss.

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot

Feral

Ryadic wrote:

Christians are the worst, according to Elki. I agree.

My mom is a Christian.

MyDcmbr

The hoodscoops on a Subaru are functional though, since they place the intercooler right below it.

MyDcmbr

Ryadic wrote:

Christians are the worst, according to Elki. I agree.

:cry:

Elki

Fine, don't take very necessary shots at Christianity. And at Tim Tebow who is a menace to us all.

Don't do that.

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot

Tim Tebow? More like Tim Tebutts

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot

I don't know who Tim Tebow is

ronya

Caveman Paws wrote:

Filipinos

Known as domestic labour throughout much of East Asia.

Evil Multifarious wrote:

holy shit the drug they gave my girlfriend is pretty crazy intense.

It's called a "last resort" antibiotic on the wiki, but the doctor told her that it's a pretty minor, early stage infection

i guess she wanted to nuke from orbit

encouragin' antibiotic resistance all day, erry day

better finish that prescription

Elki

Feral wrote:

Ryadic wrote:

Christians are the worst, according to Elki. I agree.

My mom is a Christian.

And how does that make you feel?

Tav

Feral, please make a new chat thread. Possibly about how Christians are the worst.

japan for backup.

Variable for moral support.

Tav you stay the hell away.

japan

MyDcmbr wrote:

The hoodscoops on a Subaru are functional though, since they place the intercooler right below it.

That's because Subaru will insist on making funny-shaped engines.

skippydumptruck

MyDcmbr wrote:

The hoodscoops on a Subaru are functional though, since they place the intercooler right below it.

chu made the same comment

haters used to cosmetic scoops i guess

Feral

Elki wrote:

Fine, don't take very necessary shots at Christianity. And at Tim Tebow who is a menace to us all.

Don't do that.

Tebow is a dick.

This is what Tebow reminds me of:

MyDcmbr

japan wrote:

MyDcmbr wrote:

The hoodscoops on a Subaru are functional though, since they place the intercooler right below it.

That's because Subaru will insist on making funny-shaped engines.

Oh so you think that Porsche makes funny shaped engines too?

Hmm?

HMMMMMM?!

nexuscrawler

is the daily mash the UK Onion?

TehSloth

MyDcmbr wrote:

The hoodscoops on a Subaru are functional though, since they place the intercooler right below it.

Yeah, I just don't like the look of them. Like, the one on the Mini Cooper S is very charming.

BeNarwhal

This football game. The funniest Elki, the funniest.

Tav

Vanguard

Debating whether or not to go buy an iPad2. Like, tonight.

Elki

BeNarwhal wrote:

This football game. The funniest Elki, the funniest.

First he rapes women, and now this? That man is a monster.

Elki

Vanguard wrote:

Debating whether or not to go buy an iPad2. Like, tonight.

Isn't it almost iPad 3 time?

thehumandignity

Elki wrote:

Vanguard wrote:

Debating whether or not to go buy an iPad2. Like, tonight.

Isn't it almost iPad 3 time?

ipad 2 is out, so yes.

Ryadic

Sports players are the worst. They thank God for their touchdowns, but what about the defensive Christian players. Was he all like, "Fuck you, I like Tebow better!"?

Vanguard

Elki wrote:

Vanguard wrote:

Debating whether or not to go buy an iPad2. Like, tonight.

Isn't it almost iPad 3 time?

I don't care about that. I just need a replacement for my shit computer which is about 7 years old at this point. The thing is, I don't actually need full processing power. Since I work all day on a computer, the only things I'm interested in doing after work are watching movies, posting on various message boards, and checking my email.

Nova_C

Man, the boxer engine is awesome.

More torque than inlines and much less vibration.

japan

nexuscrawler wrote:

is the daily mash the UK Onion?

Basically.

Barton denies existence of FA

JOEY Barton has refused to serve his three-match ban after disproving the existence of the Football Association using Nietzschean perspectivism.

The Queens Park Rangers ontologist and occasional midfielder was censured by the FA after trying to test the theory of subjective materialism and the non-existence of matter by using his forehead as a medium.

Barton said: "Without empirical proof of FA chairman David Bernstein's existence I will continue to give 110% for the team, despite the concept's inherent mathematical inconsistency.

"I hope my continued presence on the pitch despite my supposed ban will raise an interesting debate on the categorical nature of competing.

"If a player scores a goal and nobody knows why he's on the pitch, does he still run around with his shirt over his head?"

The player has had a history of controversy, most notably when he argued that God was dead when in fact Barton had just given him an almighty kicking outside a Liverpool branch of McDonalds.

He is the first player to receive a three-match ban for excessive philosophical debate since the 1970 Cup Final when Ron 'Chopper' Harris posited his theory on the fragility of human existence using the knees of Eddie Gray.

Barton added: "I will move on from this incident as that which does not kill me makes me stronger at the end of the day, Gary."

MyDcmbr

Vanguard wrote:

I don't care about that. I just need a replacement for my shit computer which is about 7 years old at this point. The thing is, I don't actually need full processing power. Since I work all day on a computer, the only things I'm interested in doing after work are watching movies, posting on various message boards, and checking my email.

Then it sounds like an iPad 2 is perfect for you.

BeNarwhal

Elki wrote:

BeNarwhal wrote:

This football game. The funniest Elki, the funniest.

First he rapes women, and now this? That man is a monster.

Not being allowed meaningful playoff success is his punishment forever. His holy punishment.

Granted, all weekend the team performing well at the half eventually gets trampled, so ...

DasUberEdward

This is like that episode of tom and jerry where tom has the 1940s tough guy cousin that beats up Tom.

yeah my brain ain't right.

TehSloth

My boss is a Gator and of course a huge tebophile, so there's a great amount of tebowing in preperation of any menial task he asks of me.

japan

MyDcmbr wrote:

japan wrote:

MyDcmbr wrote:

The hoodscoops on a Subaru are functional though, since they place the intercooler right below it.

That's because Subaru will insist on making funny-shaped engines.

Oh so you think that Porsche makes funny shaped engines too?

Hmm?

HMMMMMM?!

Yes. Also BMW (for bikes).

skippydumptruck

japan wrote:

MyDcmbr wrote:

The hoodscoops on a Subaru are functional though, since they place the intercooler right below it.

That's because Subaru will insist on making funny-shaped engines.

mazdaspeed3 and the turbo lancer have scoops too

Tav

japan wrote:

Barton denies existence of FA

ahaha this is the best

DasUberEdward

Vanguard wrote:

Debating whether or not to go buy an iPad2. Like, tonight.

do it do it do it.

i'm actually about to take mine over to grandparents because my grandfather wants me to come show him if there's a way he could replace the fonts in his typewriter to make them larger. this is going to be really interesting.

Organichu

skippydumptruck wrote:

MyDcmbr wrote:

The hoodscoops on a Subaru are functional though, since they place the intercooler right below it.

chu made the same comment

haters used to cosmetic scoops i guess

i don't think hood scoops look dumb because they're usually just cosmetic

i think hood scoops look dumb because i think hood scoops look dumb?

skippydumptruck

Elki wrote:

Vanguard wrote:

Debating whether or not to go buy an iPad2. Like, tonight.

Isn't it almost iPad 3 time?

march

possibly with a retina display

Nova_C

The boxer engine also allows Subaru to mount the engine low in the car, lowering the center of gravity and increasing handling and stability.

EDIT: Yes, I drank the kool-aid.

skippydumptruck

Organichu wrote:

skippydumptruck wrote:

MyDcmbr wrote:

The hoodscoops on a Subaru are functional though, since they place the intercooler right below it.

chu made the same comment

haters used to cosmetic scoops i guess

i don't think hood scoops look dumb because they're usually just cosmetic

i think hood scoops look dumb because i think hood scoops look dumb?

but!