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Hyberbole and a [chat]

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Posts

  • ChanusChanus Registered User regular
    Pony wrote:
    so, talked to the guy who is interviewing me on tuesday

    i applied for a different job with this agency months ago, which isn't the one i applied for yesterday and am interviewing for tuesday

    but apparently in applying they still did some background checking and there's some "issues we need to discuss" regarding things they found out

    can't be anything too serious or disqualifying or they'd not have bothered calling me at all

    but it will be interesting to see what dirt they've dug up on me

    We see you're active on an internet forum...

  • SarksusSarksus playing tennisRegistered User regular
    edited January 2012
    You all want gross? I got it. The other week somebody linked me to a website. On it this girl takes a camera and what must be some elegant lighting equipment and she

    pries open her vagina and takes pictures of her organ each day in order to record her cycle.

    Have you ever seen what you put your dick into? It's basically a car wash in there full of blood and mucous except at the end is a fucking sand worm.

    Sarksus on
    Jokerman
  • ChanusChanus Registered User regular
    Quid wrote:
    Sarksus wrote:
    Some of the crap you people talk about is stuff I'd only discuss with people I hated or wanted to fuck.

    Weirdos.

    Oh man on my last trip there was an officer who started talking religion with a couple of the enlisted guys and made everyone aware that he felt premarital sex was basically cheating, and people should have no right to do so.

    From there on out for a month it was nothing but filthy sex talk around him by everyone.

    Who did he think he'd be cheating on? Jesus?

  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck you must go on i cant go on ill go onRegistered User regular
    what kinds of crimes can a small horse commit

    obF2Wuw.png
  • zeenyzeeny Registered User regular
    edited January 2012
    Pony wrote:
    so, talked to the guy who is interviewing me on tuesday

    i applied for a different job with this agency months ago, which isn't the one i applied for yesterday and am interviewing for tuesday

    but apparently in applying they still did some background checking and there's some "issues we need to discuss" regarding things they found out

    can't be anything too serious or disqualifying or they'd not have bothered calling me at all

    but it will be interesting to see what dirt they've dug up on me

    "Sir, you have been expressing strongly controversial opinions on an internet forum. Would you be, ok with ceasing this activity?"

    Edit: Fucking Chanus.

    zeeny on
  • ChanusChanus Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote:
    You all want gross? I got it. The other week somebody linked me to a website. On it this girl takes a camera and what must be some elegant lighting equipment and she

    pries open her vagina and takes pictures of her organ each day in order to record her cycle.

    Have you ever seen what you put your dick into? It's basically a car wash in there full of blood and mucous except at the end is a fucking sand worm.

    Preserved for posterity.

  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    Chanus wrote:
    Pony wrote:
    so, talked to the guy who is interviewing me on tuesday

    i applied for a different job with this agency months ago, which isn't the one i applied for yesterday and am interviewing for tuesday

    but apparently in applying they still did some background checking and there's some "issues we need to discuss" regarding things they found out

    can't be anything too serious or disqualifying or they'd not have bothered calling me at all

    but it will be interesting to see what dirt they've dug up on me

    We see you're active on an internet forum...

    there's been at least one international federal investigation that's come about as a result of my posts here so

    i wouldn't be surprised

  • QuidQuid The Fifth Horseman Registered User regular
    Chanus wrote:
    Quid wrote:
    Sarksus wrote:
    Some of the crap you people talk about is stuff I'd only discuss with people I hated or wanted to fuck.

    Weirdos.

    Oh man on my last trip there was an officer who started talking religion with a couple of the enlisted guys and made everyone aware that he felt premarital sex was basically cheating, and people should have no right to do so.

    From there on out for a month it was nothing but filthy sex talk around him by everyone.

    Who did he think he'd be cheating on? Jesus?

    His argument was literally that both people are cheating on their future spouses they should be having post marital sex with.

  • ChanusChanus Registered User regular
  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck you must go on i cant go on ill go onRegistered User regular
    wat is dis about international men of mystery pony

    lets hear it

    obF2Wuw.png
  • ChanusChanus Registered User regular
    Quid wrote:
    Chanus wrote:
    Quid wrote:
    Sarksus wrote:
    Some of the crap you people talk about is stuff I'd only discuss with people I hated or wanted to fuck.

    Weirdos.

    Oh man on my last trip there was an officer who started talking religion with a couple of the enlisted guys and made everyone aware that he felt premarital sex was basically cheating, and people should have no right to do so.

    From there on out for a month it was nothing but filthy sex talk around him by everyone.

    Who did he think he'd be cheating on? Jesus?

    His argument was literally that both people are cheating on their future spouses they should be having post marital sex with.

    That's just too dumb to live.

  • OrganichuOrganichu Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote:
    You all want gross? I got it. The other week somebody linked me to a website. On it this girl takes a camera and what must be some elegant lighting equipment and she

    pries open her vagina and takes pictures of her organ each day in order to record her cycle.

    Have you ever seen what you put your dick into? It's basically a car wash in there full of blood and mucous except at the end is a fucking sand worm.

    you need to get laid, dude

    it's not like people are talking about eating shit

    they're talking about facials, with only bowen being especially vivid

    XMSODhjrer45.gif
  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    Chanus wrote:
    what kinds of crimes can a small horse commit

    Felponies?

    Misdemeanhorse?

    nice

  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    wat is dis about international men of mystery pony

    lets hear it

    what

  • OrganichuOrganichu Registered User regular
    guys

    guys

    horse meat?

    FILLY CHEESESTEAKS

    XMSODhjrer45.gif
  • SarksusSarksus playing tennisRegistered User regular
    Organichu do you have a camera in my room to determine whether or not I have gotten laid.

  • ChanusChanus Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote:
    Organichu do you have a camera in my room to determine whether or not I have gotten laid.

    That's not necessarily the purpose, but yes.

  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck you must go on i cant go on ill go onRegistered User regular
    your investigation sisbrohorse

    obF2Wuw.png
  • descdesc think u know wat time while i'm sat navvin'Registered User regular
    Organichu wrote:
    guys

    guys

    horse meat?

    FILLY CHEESESTEAKS

    God it was right in front of us the whole time

  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote:
    Organichu do you have a camera in my room to determine whether or not I have gotten laid.

    if he does, that makes 2

  • Zen VulgarityZen Vulgarity Ask me about Super Propane and Super Propane accessoriesRegistered User regular
    Ejaculate on chu's ass

    344B2YT.gifsteamicon48x48.gif Know about web development? I need your help with my professional site!
  • ElendilElendil Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote:
    Organichu do you have a camera in my room to determine whether or not I have gotten laid.

    Per3th.jpg
  • OrganichuOrganichu Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote:
    Organichu do you have a camera in my room to determine whether or not I have gotten laid.

    pony's camera watches my camera, mostly

    XMSODhjrer45.gif
  • bowenbowen Registered User regular
    edited January 2012
    Anyone know how to get vmware server 2.0 to install on ubuntu 11.10 this shit is frustrating me?

    bowen on
  • ChanusChanus Registered User regular
    I don't.

    I need to mess around with some Linux more.

    Just for something to do.

  • descdesc think u know wat time while i'm sat navvin'Registered User regular
    God DAMNIT crm just fucking GO

  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    Organichu wrote:
    Sarksus wrote:
    Organichu do you have a camera in my room to determine whether or not I have gotten laid.

    pony's camera watches my camera, mostly

    is that what that is?

    the team wasn't sure, we sorta just kept observing to be careful

  • DeebaserDeebaser At the corporate garage sale This is cheap and plentifulRegistered User regular
    Chanus wrote:
    Pony wrote:
    so, talked to the guy who is interviewing me on tuesday

    i applied for a different job with this agency months ago, which isn't the one i applied for yesterday and am interviewing for tuesday

    but apparently in applying they still did some background checking and there's some "issues we need to discuss" regarding things they found out

    can't be anything too serious or disqualifying or they'd not have bothered calling me at all

    but it will be interesting to see what dirt they've dug up on me

    We see you're active on an internet forum...

    This is one of my biggest fears

  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    Deebaser wrote:
    Chanus wrote:
    Pony wrote:
    so, talked to the guy who is interviewing me on tuesday

    i applied for a different job with this agency months ago, which isn't the one i applied for yesterday and am interviewing for tuesday

    but apparently in applying they still did some background checking and there's some "issues we need to discuss" regarding things they found out

    can't be anything too serious or disqualifying or they'd not have bothered calling me at all

    but it will be interesting to see what dirt they've dug up on me

    We see you're active on an internet forum...

    This is one of my biggest fears

    i've had it happen

  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck you must go on i cant go on ill go onRegistered User regular
    anybody reading the complete shit i post would just assume it wasnt me

    so its np

    obF2Wuw.png
  • ChanusChanus Registered User regular
    Deebaser wrote:
    Chanus wrote:
    Pony wrote:
    so, talked to the guy who is interviewing me on tuesday

    i applied for a different job with this agency months ago, which isn't the one i applied for yesterday and am interviewing for tuesday

    but apparently in applying they still did some background checking and there's some "issues we need to discuss" regarding things they found out

    can't be anything too serious or disqualifying or they'd not have bothered calling me at all

    but it will be interesting to see what dirt they've dug up on me

    We see you're active on an internet forum...

    This is one of my biggest fears

    I've been yelling at things on the internet for like 16 years now... I've given up on worrying about it. Someone's gonna find something and I'll just have to own up to it :P

  • durandal4532durandal4532 Registered User regular
    Damn, my dad dying is really making me understand why I love my family, and hate my extended family.

    My mom told my sister and I that she doesn't want to do a wake or a funeral, just a party at some point when we're a bit less distraught and can properly celebrate how great my dad was. Which, jesus yes. I am so happy we aren't suddenly pretending to give a shit about having some vaguely religious involvement because we've seen it on TV.

    My extended family, on the other hand, are asking us why we don't let my father's asshole of a brother come see us. Because obviously it isn't enough that we, the grieving, find him abhorrent. No, my dad dying is in no way a license for me to request any modification to your behavior no sir. God damn. And for real he was in the house for an hour wednesday, and in five minutes he mentioned how much he loved Big Bang Theory, made fun of comic collecting for being stupid, made a few racist comments about the Indian guy on the show and made sure to say how he didn't want any of that fucking GREEK food. Because he's somehow racist against Greek people like he's from the 20's. Fuck.

    Also! My idiot fucking cousin broke down crying on monday as we were waiting for news from the hospital and trying to eat... because her stomach hurt and just looking at food was REALLY HARD okay? I wanted to remove her intestines and strangle her with them. If I'm not crying, you don't get to cry. Particularly not about your ridiculous psychosomatic eating problems you fucking child.

    Also thank god most of my friends are atheists. No one has told me god has a plan yet.

  • Donkey KongDonkey Kong Don't treat me like potato. Registered User regular
    Chanus wrote:
    Pony wrote:
    so, talked to the guy who is interviewing me on tuesday

    i applied for a different job with this agency months ago, which isn't the one i applied for yesterday and am interviewing for tuesday

    but apparently in applying they still did some background checking and there's some "issues we need to discuss" regarding things they found out

    can't be anything too serious or disqualifying or they'd not have bothered calling me at all

    but it will be interesting to see what dirt they've dug up on me

    We see you're active on an internet forum...

    Oh god, having flashbacks

    china_sig.jpg
  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    i had a group of cops, including armed federal agents

    show up at my door and ask me about my posts on this forum

    i imagine this will probably come up on tuesday during my job interview

  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck you must go on i cant go on ill go onRegistered User regular
    come on pony stop being coy

    hit us with the dangling meat of this story

    obF2Wuw.png
  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    Also thank god most of my friends are atheists. No one has told me god has a plan yet.

    god these people are infuriating when you are suffering a loss

    my sympathies, duder

  • ChanusChanus Registered User regular
    Damn, my dad dying is really making me understand why I love my family, and hate my extended family.

    My mom told my sister and I that she doesn't want to do a wake or a funeral, just a party at some point when we're a bit less distraught and can properly celebrate how great my dad was. Which, jesus yes. I am so happy we aren't suddenly pretending to give a shit about having some vaguely religious involvement because we've seen it on TV.

    My extended family, on the other hand, are asking us why we don't let my father's asshole of a brother come see us. Because obviously it isn't enough that we, the grieving, find him abhorrent. No, my dad dying is in no way a license for me to request any modification to your behavior no sir. God damn. And for real he was in the house for an hour wednesday, and in five minutes he mentioned how much he loved Big Bang Theory, made fun of comic collecting for being stupid, made a few racist comments about the Indian guy on the show and made sure to say how he didn't want any of that fucking GREEK food. Because he's somehow racist against Greek people like he's from the 20's. Fuck.

    Also! My idiot fucking cousin broke down crying on monday as we were waiting for news from the hospital and trying to eat... because her stomach hurt and just looking at food was REALLY HARD okay? I wanted to remove her intestines and strangle her with them. If I'm not crying, you don't get to cry. Particularly not about your ridiculous psychosomatic eating problems you fucking child.

    Also thank god most of my friends are atheists. No one has told me god has a plan yet.

    Fuck.

  • thehumandignitythehumandignity Registered User
    Sarksus I have Alpha Centauri installed.

    Let's settle, and then destroy, the next frontier.

  • WinkyWinky Registered User regular
    So I made a new "business" gmail account that forwards to my "personal" gmail account, and I set it up so that my "personal" gmail account forwards to the "business" gmail account as well.

    But what would happen, then, if I used one of my accounts to e-mail the other account?




    E M A I L P A R A D O X

    f1i3ys.jpg
  • OrganichuOrganichu Registered User regular
    Winky wrote:
    So I made a new "business" gmail account that forwards to my "personal" gmail account, and I set it up so that my "personal" gmail account forwards to the "business" gmail account as well.

    But what would happen, then, if I used one of my accounts to e-mail the other account?




    E M A I L P A R A D O X

    what was the point of that

    if you're forwarding all of a to b why do you need to forward all of b to a

    XMSODhjrer45.gif
This discussion has been closed.