Some sort of bug has recently crawled up national Republicans asses. That bug? The vagina.
Apparently the GOP, in their infinite wisdom, has decided that the way to win back an increasingly turned-off to their shenanigans electorate is to start sticking their hands, feet, heads, ears, nose, eyes, toes into women's vaginas.
In the past week, we have had the GOP (along with Catholic bishops) freaking out about contraception as if we had suddenly returned to 1950
Not content enough with simply putting out press releases and appearing on Fox News to talk about how contraceptive use will destroy our nation, The Great Investigator Darrell Issa is holding a meeting today to discuss contraceptive use. How many women has he invited to this hearing? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Okay, well, what about people who support the use of contraceptives and the new regulation? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Oh man you're killing me here!
The lead witness is the Most Reverend William E. Lori, Roman Catholic Bishop of Bridgeport, Connecticut, and chair of the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops’ Ad Hoc Committee on Religious Liberty. Judging from Lori and the rest of the witness list, it’s obvious that Issa has posed what he considers to be a rhetorical question and lined up nine like-minded rhetoricians to answer it anyway. None of the religious groups supportive of the Obama administration will be heard from.
Eight out of nine of Issa’s witnesses are Orthodox Christian, Catholic, and evangelical, and represent Christian institutions, one of which, Belmont Abbey College, has sued HHS over the contraception requirement.
Not only did he not invite any women, but he specifically barred women from appearing
When my staff inquired about requesting minority witnesses for this hearing, we were informed that you would allow only one. Based on your decision, we requested as our minority witness a third-year Georgetown University Law Center student named Sandra Fluke. I believed it was critical to have at least one woman at the witness table who could discuss the repercussions that denying coverage for contraceptives has on women across this country.
In response, your staff relayed that you had decided as follows:
“As the hearing is not about reproductive rights and contraception but instead about the Administration’s actions as they relate to freedom of religion and conscience, he believes that Ms. Fluke is not an appropriate witness.” [...]
Instead of inviting Ms. Fluke to testify, your staff informed us that you planned to invite a different witness who was no longer available after being informed of your decision to limit the minority to a single witness. Compounding this insult, this afternoon you added two more witnesses of your own, in violation of Committee rules requiring three days notice for witnesses called by the majority.
Phew, all this anti-women nonsense is pretty exhausting, but at least we're almost done, right? Oh you silly, child you. Of course we're not!
Just yesterday, the Virginia state congress decided that simply making regular ultrasounds necessary before performing an abortion (as other states have done) wasn't enough. NOT NEARLY! Oh no! Virginia will now physically probe your vagina before allowing you to have an abortion.
The ultrasound legislation would constitute an unprecedented government mandate to insert vaginal ultrasonic probes into women as part of a state-ordered effort to dissuade them from terminating pregnancies, legislative opponents noted.
"We're talking about inside a woman's body," Del. Charnielle Herring, a Democrat, said in an emotional floor speech. "This is the first time, if we pass this bill, that we will be dictating a medical procedure to a physician."
The conservative Family Foundation hailed the ultrasound measure as an "update" to the state's existing informed consent laws "with the most advanced medical technology available."
And of course, let's not forget the Susan G. Komen Foundation's decision to cut off funding to Planned Parenthood due to PP's ridiculously, absurdly, ludicrously
high rate of 3% of all services rendered being abortions. 3%! That's three whole times as many as 1%!
And now, finally, we are done. For now, at least. The GOP has decided an all out war on women is what will surely get them to win Congress and the White House back this year. In 2012. The year two thousand and twelve. The current year. Second millenium and twelve years. The 21st century. Putting women back in their places.