Hitman 2 is a shitty, stupid game for retards

Drez

I think the only LP I read was the crazy Persona 3 LP. "My Life Is A Goddamn Mess" or whatever it was called. And that was a text-based LP. And I didn't read all of it. And it was mostly satirical fan fiction anyway. It was decent. I barely have time to play games myself though so I'm not really interested in reading/watching someone else play one.

That said, I think this was a brilliant idea and I look forward to the final product.

joshofalltrades

Rent wrote:

no no we are not turning this into an lp chat thread where people express terrible opinions on lettuce plays and go "HEY...HEY TUBE...YOU SHOULD TOTES WATCH THIS MEDIOCRE LP BECAUSE IT IS THE BESSSSSSSSST please have me guest on your lp please please please"

or the alternative "pa lpers 'ironically' make fun of their lps whilst simultaneously begging for views"

no we are not doing this

if you want to talk about lps and i can tell you why your opinions are bad go to the lp archive. that includes lpers passive-aggressively begging for lp views

ed: tube what's your recording setup look like brosef, recording vidya games is surprisingly more complicated and annoying than youd think

But I am not making fun of your LP ironically

DodgeBlan

Tube died for our sins

Iolo

1) Not all LPs are bad. Some are in fact fucking fantastic.

2)

Vaguely Lightningproof wrote:

Spoiler:

TychoCelchuuu wrote:

I feel this didn't get nearly the level of respect it deserved.

Laughing at this just tipped off my wife in the next room that I am not at this exact moment working on our taxes.

3) This whole escapade is madness. Glorious madness. Handgimp earned that infraction.

Basil

Oh goodness. This will be a treat.

Nuzak

Daedalus wrote:

There were some decent parts to Hitman 2. There was the opening level, at that mafioso's villa; the one that was the demo, that one was pretty good. The part in the office building was fun, at least for the first half, with the computer geek, where if you stepped on the Cheetos spilled all over the floor, he would hear you. That was funny. There was... um...

yeah, that's about it. Everything in Russia, Japan, and Genericmiddleeastistan was pretty terrible. The finale sucked too, especially compared to the next two games, which each ended with a fantastic blow-off.

opened really shitty like, imo. not gameplay wise i guess, just... he went and became a buddhist monk, i just

cj iwakura

Vaguely Lightningproof wrote:

TychoCelchuuu wrote:

I feel this didn't get nearly the level of respect it deserved.

Bloodlines is near and dear to CT, also, so it's quite well played.

august

Nuzak wrote:

opened really shitty like, imo. not gameplay wise i guess, just... he went and became a buddhist monk, i just

He was the groundskeeper at a a Catholic church I'm pretty sure. Not really the same thing.

Really they could do anything they wanted with his personality after 1, because in Hitman 1 he had no personality.

Frem

The only thing I know about Hitman is

a) That level with a huge crowd that people always bring up as an example of what the PS2 could do.
b) Hitman 2 is the worst one.

This will be my introduction to the series. Hopefully the narration will be very educational. Or hilarious. Possibly both! <3

Dox the PI

Frem wrote:

The only thing I know about Hitman is

a) That level with a huge crowd that people always bring up as an example of what the PS2 could do.
b) Hitman 2 is the worst one.

This will be my introduction to the series. Hopefully the narration will be very educational. Or hilarious. Possibly both! <3

you should watch these

cooljammer00

And again, I'm reminded of Ginger Mijango's Hitman Blood Money LP, forever lost to the Stage 6 fires of the late 00s

zanetheinsane

I would absolutely be for this if he promised to get Silent Assassin on every level... on Professional! I can legitimately wish this on another soul because I have actually done this myself (there was a point in time where I was obsessed with this game).

No joke, the time recorded for the ninja snipers in towers levels was something over 2 hours (that was just for the actual completed run, I spent something like 30-40 hours on some levels practicing). And remember, on Professional you do not get to use any saves at all on any level; one fuck-up and you're in a keyboard-smashing rage.

.... Actually, on second thought, that would be the longest LP ever! Better scratch that idea. =p

Nuzak

cooljammer00 wrote:

And again, I'm reminded of Ginger Mijango's Hitman Blood Money LP, forever lost to the Stage 6 fires of the late 00s

that was a great lp.

mxmarks

I actually only ever read text LP's. I usually dont have time to watch someone play something, but plenty of time to silently read it. But the only two Ive ever found (and loved) were someones Jurassic Park: Operaton Genesis one, and Dark Id's DRAKENGARD, which is the best ever.

But this - oh I will make the time. This will easily be something I treat like a TV show, setting aside time for every installment with a nice frosty mug of a good brew in a comfy chair.

If it goes up on YouTube I will absolutely be watching it through my XBox on my big TV.

darleysam

mxmarks wrote:

I actually only ever read text LP's. I usually dont have time to watch someone play something, but plenty of time to silently read it. But the only two Ive ever found (and loved) were someones Jurassic Park: Operaton Genesis one, and Dark Id's DRAKENGARD, which is the best ever.

But this - oh I will make the time. This will easily be something I treat like a TV show, setting aside time for every installment with a nice frosty mug of a good brew in a comfy chair.

If it goes up on YouTube I will absolutely be watching it through my XBox on my big TV.

Cackling mercilessly to yourself until the video starts and you realise that what you see is not Hitman 2, but phone numbers, bank details and naked pictures of everybody who donated.

SniperGuy

The only audio will be a constant stream of angry cursing.

Handgimp

darleysam wrote:

Cackling mercilessly to yourself until the video starts and you realise that what you see is not Hitman 2, but phone numbers, bank details and naked pictures of everybody who donated.

Well shit, I'll post mine right now. Let's get the party started!

518-867-5309
06700476 1492538

Spoiler:

no that's not a real routing number/account number combo; doesn't even have the appropriate digits. and if you don't get the phone number reference i'm sad

Drez

darleysam wrote: »

mxmarks wrote:

I actually only ever read text LP's. I usually dont have time to watch someone play something, but plenty of time to silently read it. But the only two Ive ever found (and loved) were someones Jurassic Park: Operaton Genesis one, and Dark Id's DRAKENGARD, which is the best ever.

But this - oh I will make the time. This will easily be something I treat like a TV show, setting aside time for every installment with a nice frosty mug of a good brew in a comfy chair.

If it goes up on YouTube I will absolutely be watching it through my XBox on my big TV.

Cackling mercilessly to yourself until the video starts and you realise that what you see is not Hitman 2, but phone numbers, bank details and naked pictures of everybody who donated.

I'm picturing that scene in the Ransom remake where Mel Gibson offers the money as a bounty instead.

cardboard delusions

Handgimp wrote: »

darleysam wrote:

Cackling mercilessly to yourself until the video starts and you realise that what you see is not Hitman 2, but phone numbers, bank details and naked pictures of everybody who donated.

Well shit, I'll post mine right now. Let's get the party started!

518-867-5309
06700476 1492538

Spoiler:

no that's not a real routing number/account number combo; doesn't even have the appropriate digits. and if you don't get the phone number reference i'm sad

Jenny I got yo number.... I GOT IT, GOT IT

DoctorArch

Old people represent!

Gaming-Freak

Meh, I wouldn't know. I never played a single Hitman because back when I was a kid, I was stupid and though stealth games were probably stupid. It wasn't until 4 years later that I got an actual appreciation of them, but by then Hitman fell completely off my radar.

Goose!

Hey Tube, when this goes up, where will we see it? Will there be a thread or just up on youtube/other video service?

jakobagger

Damn it, when I saw the thread had a new post I hoped there would be a youtube link. Unreasonable expectations I know, but I have faith in Tube. Already I can confidently say this was the best money I spent last month.

But yeah, I second Goose!'s question.

corky842

Part 1 has been posted, thread is here:
http://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/166469/hitman-2-livestream-video-part-1

mrt144

Tube wrote:

It's common knowledge that Hitman 2 is the worst game of all time and that anyone who likes it is mentally crippled. For Child's Play this year, I'm auctioning off the ability to force me to do a let's play of this un-fucking-believably shithouse violation of every principle of design ever conceived. It's a pool bid, and every 100 dollars raised forces me to play another level of this turd. You'll notice that below it is a pool that forces me to raise the difficulty level, making it take longer. So you know. Enjoy that.

www.solidsaints.com/pools

I am going to donate so much money.

edit: Wow, I thought this was recent. I am sad now.

Tube

So, so late to the party

mrt144

Are there any other games you hate with a burning passion?

APODionysus

Tube wrote: »

So, so late to the party

Well, while we have you here @Tube what's the status of getting the Hitman 2 LP on YouTube? My train rides to work demand entertainment.

Dark Raven X

It's already started!

Hidden links though. Think they were up in the Amnesia play thread.

Aaand now I can't find it. D:

El Skid

Here is the thread for the first episode.

By the by, if you ever want to stalk Tube you can just click on his name beside any of his posts- you can see what threads he created and what he's commenting on.

...Not that I'm ever bored enough to follow him around the forums and watch him make fun of people. >_<