Hello everyone, umm...this is my first time ever using this so excuse me if I make some mistakes and don't come off right. Also...I'm not usually one to ask for advice or anything but I feel that PA is generally full of good people and I think that most of you all have had to go through college or at least are in college at some point in your life. Either way...back to what I wanted to talk about.
Well, I guess I should give some background. I think I started to whole college deal back when I was around 21 or something. I started late because I really wasn't sure what I wanted to do with my life and honestly it didn't occur to me that I should start doing something until I noticed that a lot of my friends were already going to and completing college, making me feel left behind.
I pretty much started out small, going to a community college just to get a feel for what I wanted to do. I still didn't have much of an idea that being said I took a lot of "gifted" courses in my youth, did pretty good in math and sciences, and had a pretty high ACT score(Midwest equivalent of the SAT). I had a thing for technology and sciences so I thought that I would try for tech school.
However, I never really came from the wealthiest family and I'm also the oldest of 6 children and I didn't want to burden my mother worrying about me so I decided to work while I went to school. I managed to get a job at UPS(it was also the first job I'd ever had so I was pretty happy).
I would say that my first year at the University for pretty good. Most of the stuff was stuff I still knew from high school so I didn't really have to try. Mostly A and Bs. My semester after that was pretty good too. That being said I would completely bomb the next year. So badly that I would go from being on a student with a 3.8 GPA to having a 2.1 and being on academic probation.
The school helped me and I was able to get myself together but I wasn't so sure if I'd managed to get myself together because I really wanted to or because I was so scared of failing.
That brings me to this year where I find myself in pretty much the same spot I was beforehand. Not doing to well on my midterms, almost completely unmotivated to do anything, frustrated because I'm letting myself fall behind so much, and tired all of the time because of my school, work, sleep, school, work, sleep routine. Not only that but UPS is a pretty physically demanding job so I would find myself too exhausted to do anything on a lot of days.
Also, I'm somewhat of a minority at my school and not very social to begin with so a lot of the time I feel like I'm completely alone with my problems and I don't have anywhere to turn to. I know I'm not lazy...at least I believe I'm not...and I believe I'm willing to work hard, which makes it even more difficult for me when I fall into this same rut over and over again.
I'm not sure if anyone has been in this kind of predicament before, but I guess what I'm asking is like for people who may have had problems like these during college how do you overcome them? Because I don't want to fail...and I don't want to fail people I know want me to succeed...but I guess I just feel so lost at times.