the strangest thing you have witnessed

Caulk Bite 6

Weaver wrote: »

Explained to a lawyer tonight the various atmospheric layers of Jupiter because of the simple question, what are you most afraid of.

I'm afraid of Jupiter.

Best not click this scary spoiler, then.

Spoiler:

Skylark

Weaver wrote: »

Explained to a lawyer tonight the various atmospheric layers of Jupiter because of the simple question, what are you most afraid of.

I'm afraid of Jupiter.

In his defence, up until like 306 AD, it was a pretty damn good reason to be afraid.

Blake T

Why would you be afraid of Jupiter.

It's pretty boss.

Mr Fuzzbutt

one day jupiter will fall out of orbit and swallow the earth

it is true

Crimson King

earth will be literally under seige by planet fucking jupiter

ASimPerson

Crimson King wrote: »

earth will be literally under seige by planet fucking jupiter

OH SHIT

Weaver

I straight up posted a scary dream I had the other night where I was on a craft that was given bad burn info and dipped into Titans atmosphere.

Gas giants frighten me by their very scale.

edit: yes I know Titan is just a moon of a Saturn, the mission in the dream was to enter orbit around Saturn

dbrock270

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Jizz
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Jizz-box

Caulk Bite 6

what do you call the musical about sperm whale hunters?

Spoiler:

Jizz Whalers

ASimPerson

dbrock270 wrote: »

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Jizz
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Jizz-box

The next time I'm watching A New Hope with someone I'm not sure I'll be able to resist pointing this out.

honkytonk

I saw a car swerving back and forth on the highway, enter the overgrowth/underbrush to the left of, and about 4 feet below, the highway.Then it drove up one of those roads connecting the two highway directions and flew, upside down, somewhere between 3 and 8 feet above the road, into a thick forest. Really bizarre and surreal, it felt like I had a guest pass on a Hollywood stunt yard.

Falx

honkytonk wrote: »

I saw a car swerving back and forth on the highway, enter the overgrowth/underbrush to the left of, and about 4 feet below, the highway.Then it drove up one of those roads connecting the two highway directions and flew, upside down, somewhere between 3 and 8 feet above the road, into a thick forest. Really bizarre and surreal, it felt like I had a guest pass on a Hollywood stunt yard.

I was driving home from dropping a friend off home late one night when a car about 200 meters ahead of me started going up the onramp for a bridge. Made it halfway up before he apparently decided "nope" and just drove off the side back into the road he'd just left. He wasn't going too fast and only got some slight air but the rocks and gravel he sent flying almost took out me and the guy just in front of me.

Somehow his car wasn't destroyed and he put his foot down and rocketed off.

Tasteticle

Welp I did it!

I told my g/f about her sexy crab walk over dinner last night

We were both eating and I said "Hey, you know that 'sexy walk' you do sometimes when we are in bed?"

She says "Yeah..."

I say "I don't how how else to say this so I will just say it: It is a straight up crab walk."

She pauses for a moment and looks at me and says "WHAT"

"It's really cute though! It is just that you-"

"Nononono! OH my god!!!"

She bursts out laughing

A sea of relief washes over me

She says "SEE that is EXACTLY what I thought too!! I can't do that stupid fucking walk for the life of me!! When I tried it in class we all had a laugh over how I was basically a crab!"

"Wait, what??" I respond

"Yes!! Then me and my friends were like 'oh man you should totally do this for Bryan and see how he reacts! it will be priceless!' So then I DO it for you but you were like, really into it?? So I just kept doing it for you!!"

At this point we are both in hysterics

Two grown adults, both knowing there will be a crab walk involved at some point in their sexy times, both in some sort of silent agreement to say NOTHING about it to the other person

Later that night we were getting into the business when she stops me and looks me dead in the eyes and says

"Crab walk for me"

I freeze

"What?"

"Crab walk for me. I had to do it so many times for you, so you owe me at LEAST a few sexy crab walks"

"....Fair enough"

So now it seems

That I am the one who crab walks

Zombies Tossed My Salad!

That's fantastic.

Butler

Well fuck me sideways.

Oghulk

Awesome beyond words

Brainleech

Crimson King wrote: »

earth will be literally under seige by planet fucking jupiter

Pfft we will join the Jovian sub system and like it

Kwoaru

Tasteticle you gotta put on ring it cause that lady is delightful

Weaver

Brainleech wrote: »

Crimson King wrote: »

earth will be literally under seige by planet fucking jupiter

Pfft we will join the Jovian sub system and like it

Noooo the radiation

Brainleech

Well I wonder how effective mining hydrocarbons would be in the jovian subsystem and certain areas of Saturn

I still think dying while being asphyxiated, crushed from the pressure of the atmosphere and while being roasted in the heat of the planet would be a metal way to die

Tasteticle

yes we have been together for over four years now and she has never stopped being awesome

Druhim

Brainleech wrote: »

Well I wonder how effective mining hydrocarbons would be in the jovian subsystem and certain areas of Saturn

I still think dying while being asphyxiated, crushed from the pressure of the atmosphere and while being roasted in the heat of the planet would be a metal way to die

Considering it's a massive gravity well, it seems like a pretty inefficient place to harvest hydrocarbons.

Brainleech

not Jupiter but the moons and other junk around known as the Jovian Sub system would be full of hydrocarbons but getting them is a pain

Druhim

Yeah, it still seems of dubious value. I mean, the highest volume application of hydrocarbons is for energy production. But that's been the case primarily because they've been relatively cheap to come by so far. If you're going to harvest them from the Jovian system, it seems like there are other alternatives that are more expensive than hydrocarbons currently, but should be considerably cheaper than Jovian hydrocarbons.

Uriel

I am a jovian hydrocarbon.





Burn me.

Beasteh

tasteticle could we swap lives for a few hours

i want to sexy crab walk

The Cow King

We should set jupiter on fire

That would be pretty cool

Uriel

As long as we attempt no landings on Europa.

Seriously

I only buy 100% pure jovian hydrocarbons, bottled at the source

Day of the Bear

ross you can sexy crab walk any time you want

Weaver

Mars

I wish all stories ended in a sexy crab walk

Nerdgasmic

Mars wrote: »

I wish all stories ended in a sexy crab walk

Be the change you want to see in the world

Shorty

Tasteticle wrote: »

Welp I did it!

I told my g/f about her sexy crab walk over dinner last night

We were both eating and I said "Hey, you know that 'sexy walk' you do sometimes when we are in bed?"

She says "Yeah..."

I say "I don't how how else to say this so I will just say it: It is a straight up crab walk."

She pauses for a moment and looks at me and says "WHAT"

"It's really cute though! It is just that you-"

"Nononono! OH my god!!!"

She bursts out laughing

A sea of relief washes over me

She says "SEE that is EXACTLY what I thought too!! I can't do that stupid fucking walk for the life of me!! When I tried it in class we all had a laugh over how I was basically a crab!"

"Wait, what??" I respond

"Yes!! Then me and my friends were like 'oh man you should totally do this for Bryan and see how he reacts! it will be priceless!' So then I DO it for you but you were like, really into it?? So I just kept doing it for you!!"

At this point we are both in hysterics

Two grown adults, both knowing there will be a crab walk involved at some point in their sexy times, both in some sort of silent agreement to say NOTHING about it to the other person

Later that night we were getting into the business when she stops me and looks me dead in the eyes and says

"Crab walk for me"

I freeze

"What?"

"Crab walk for me. I had to do it so many times for you, so you owe me at LEAST a few sexy crab walks"

"....Fair enough"

So now it seems

That I am the one who crab walks

the best of all possible ends to this story

Shorty

Weaver wrote: »

weaver did you know that if it weren't for Jupiter, there's a good chance life on earth would be much more unpleasant

Dronus86

oh my god sexy crab walk saga is the best

Hobnail

Uriel wrote: »

As long as we attempt no landings on Europa.

Damn this notion, Europa or bust

Brainleech

eurpoa is still a shitbox of a moon
Titan is where it's at

The Cow King

All of jupiters moons are cool

Even Ganymede

Ganymede is the largest satellite in our solar system. It is larger than Mercury and Pluto, and three-quarters the size of Mars. If Ganymede orbited the sun instead of orbiting Jupiter, it would easily be classified as a planet.

TheStig

We should crash Ganymede into mars and see if we can get a decent planet out of it.

Just make sure it doesn't hit us on accident.