Long Awaited Booby [Chat]

TTODewback

Ravenhpltc24

YAY BOOBIES!

surrealitycheck

boob

surrealitycheck

booby pls

RMS Oceanic

I've got a Wall Ring equipped, it reflects the bird's star back to it.

Gim

[/Ackbar]

TehSloth

fish in the sea -- u no how i feel

river running free -- u no how i feel

skippydumptruck

my carssssss

Houn

Man. I go off to lunch and eat a delicious fucking ruben and you fill up [chat] and start a new one. [chat]'s always messin' with me.

wandering

The Unicorn in the Garden
by James Thurber

Once upon a sunny morning a man who sat in a breakfast nook looked up from his scrambled eggs to see a white unicorn with a golden horn quietly cropping the roses in the garden. The man went up to the bedroom where his wife was still asleep and woke her. "There's a unicorn in the garden," he said. "Eating roses." She opened one unfriendly eye and looked at him.

"The unicorn is a mythical beast," she said, and turned her back on him. The man walked slowly downstairs and out into the garden. The unicorn was still there; now he was browsing among the tulips. "Here, unicorn," said the man, and he pulled up a lily and gave it to him. The unicorn ate it gravely. With a high heart, because there was a unicorn in his garden, the man went upstairs and roused his wife again. "The unicorn," he said,"ate a lily." His wife sat up in bed and looked at him coldly. "You are a booby," she said, "and I am going to have you put in the booby-hatch."

The man, who had never liked the words "booby" and "booby-hatch," and who liked them even less on a shining morning when there was a unicorn in the garden, thought for a moment. "We'll see about that," he said. He walked over to the door. "He has a golden horn in the middle of his forehead," he told her. Then he went back to the garden to watch the unicorn; but the unicorn had gone away. The man sat down among the roses and went to sleep.

As soon as the husband had gone out of the house, the wife got up and dressed as fast as she could. She was very excited and there was a gloat in her eye. She telephoned the police and she telephoned a psychiatrist; she told them to hurry to her house and bring a strait-jacket. When the police and the psychiatrist arrived they sat down in chairs and looked at her, with great interest.

"My husband," she said, "saw a unicorn this morning." The police looked at the psychiatrist and the psychiatrist looked at the police. "He told me it ate a lilly," she said. The psychiatrist looked at the police and the police looked at the psychiatrist. "He told me it had a golden horn in the middle of its forehead," she said. At a solemn signal from the psychiatrist, the police leaped from their chairs and seized the wife. They had a hard time subduing her, for she put up a terrific struggle, but they finally subdued her. Just as they got her into the strait-jacket, the husband came back into the house.

"Did you tell your wife you saw a unicorn?" asked the police. "Of course not," said the husband. "The unicorn is a mythical beast." "That's all I wanted to know," said the psychiatrist. "Take her away. I'm sorry, sir, but your wife is as crazy as a jaybird."

So they took her away, cursing and screaming, and shut her up in an institution. The husband lived happily ever after.

Moral: Don't count your boobies until they are hatched.

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot

ugh i went out to lunch and two teenagers stared at me eating and made whale noises and mooed at me and now i feel like crap

Gim

The blue color of the webbed feet in Blue-footed Boobies comes from carotenoid pigments obtained from the diet. The pigments are antioxidants and stimulants for the immune system, so there is a trade-off between immune function and signaling, since any incorporation of the pigments into the feet is a direct detraction from those that could be used for immunity and detoxification. The blue feet are sexual signals that reliably indicate the condition of the male boobies, and coloration is favored through sexual selection. The brightness of the feet decreases with age, so females tend to choose males with brighter feet (younger males). Females prefer younger males because they have higher fertility and increased ability to provide paternal care than older males. In a cross-fostering experiment, it was shown that foot color really does reflect paternal contribution to raising chicks, because chicks raised by foster fathers with brighter feet grew faster than chicks raised by foster males with duller feet. Blue feet also indicate the current condition of males. Those that were experimentally food-deprived for forty-eight hours experienced a decrease in foot brightness. This is most likely because the deprivation of food reduces the amount of lipids and lipoproteins in the body which are used to absorb and transport carotenoids. Thus, the feet are rapid and honest indicators of a booby's current level of nourishment.

Researchers found that females continuously evaluate their partners' condition based on foot color. In an experiment, males whose partners had laid a first egg in the nest had their feet dulled by make-up. Consequently, the females laid smaller second eggs a few days later. Since duller feet usually indicate a decrease in health and possibly genetic quality, it is adaptive for females to decrease their investment in the second egg. The smaller second eggs contained not only less yolk concentration, which could in turn influence embryo development, hatching success, and subsequent chick growth and survival, but also contained less yolk androgens. Androgen plays an important role in chick survival, so this also shows that female Blue-footed Boobies use the attractiveness of their mates to determine how much resources they should allocate to their eggs. This possibly supports the "Differential Allocation Theory", which predicts that parents would invest more in the care of their offspring when paired with attractive mates.

Females are not the only ones assessing their partner's reproductive value. Males, too, evaluate females and adjust their own investment in the brood according to their mate's condition. Like males, females also have a trade-off between signaling ornamentations and fecundity, because paler females actually produce more eggs in a brood. Females that lay larger and brighter eggs are in better condition and have greater reproductive value. Therefore, males tend to display higher attentiveness and parental care to larger eggs, since those eggs were produced by a female with apparent good genetic quality. Smaller, duller eggs garnered less paternal care. Female foot color was also an indication of female condition. In an experiment where the color of the eggs was muted by researchers, it was found that males were willing to exercise similar care for both large eggs and small eggs if his mate had brightly colored feet, whereas males paired with dull-footed females only incubated larger eggs. Interestingly, researchers also found that males did not increase their care when females exhibited both bright feet and high-quality offspring.

Nova_C

skippydumptruck wrote: »

my carssssss

Subaru needs to officially release the new WRX and STi so I can seeeee iiiiiiit!

The mule looks so plain! And the concept was so goddamn amazing!

a5ehren

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot wrote: »

ugh i went out to lunch and two teenagers stared at me eating and made whale noises and mooed at me and now i feel like crap

/murderallteens

Gooey

http://www.cbssports.com/nfl/blog/eye-on-football/22683592/man-wants-browns-pallbearers-so-team-can-let-him-down-one-last-time

TehSpectre

I'm blue, abadibadeda

Casual

cars i have had

annnd the current one

TTODewback

My favorite part about the OP is that I made those pictures imagining that being in the eyes of Vanguard.
Because his life in Comic Sans MS is truly the worst fate he could ever meet.

Donkey Kong

BOYCOTT THIS PRETENDER'S CHAT.

surrealitycheck

i have never had no car

send car money pls

Captain Carrot

Chanus wrote:

I don't know why anyone would ever want to own a Mustang, though, as they secrete an enzyme that turns anyone who drives one into a total douchebag.

that hurts, bro

Deebaser

I miss Keith Olbermann's Fridays with Thurber.

Casual

looooooooove the fiesta

but i never get to drive it these days because my dad has taken it >:[

i have to drive this

RMS Oceanic

surrealitycheck wrote: »

i have never had no car

send car money pls

But if you've continuously been in ownership of a car as your double negative implies, why would I do that?

BobCesca

surrealitycheck wrote: »

i have never had no car

send car money pls

You live in London. You don't need a car.

Deebaser

Gooey wrote: »

http://www.cbssports.com/nfl/blog/eye-on-football/22683592/man-wants-browns-pallbearers-so-team-can-let-him-down-one-last-time

Where can we donate money to make this happen?

Casual

what i want more than life itself is a good one of these

Thomamelas

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot wrote: »

ugh i went out to lunch and two teenagers stared at me eating and made whale noises and mooed at me and now i feel like crap

Teenagers are assholes.

japan

Thomamelas" wrote:

My brother had the worst hand me down car. He got stuck with my mom's old Voyager. There is nothing like driving a 10 year old mini-van.

Hey, I drive a fourteen year old minivan.

Alt response: http://www.autocar.co.uk/car-review/vauxhall/zafira/first-drives/vauxhall-zafira-vxr

surrealitycheck

BobCesca wrote: »

surrealitycheck wrote: »

i have never had no car

send car money pls

You live in London. You don't need a car.

I NEED HALP

Casual

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot wrote: »

ugh i went out to lunch and two teenagers stared at me eating and made whale noises and mooed at me and now i feel like crap

what the hell is wrong with some people >:[

Nova_C

Cars I have had!

Nova_C

Casual wrote: »

what i want more than life itself is a good one of these

I have a 2009 Impreza.

It is awesome.

evilbob

Cars I have had

21stCentury

I can't drive.

Driver privilege. >: (

Nova_C

Aww, @evilbob

One day you'll grow up big and strong and have a car, too!

You're an Aussie, right? Holden makes some cool stuff.

STATE OF THE ART ROBOT

Donkey Kong wrote: »

BOYCOTT THIS PRETENDER'S CHAT.

#occupyD&D

RMS Oceanic

surrealitycheck wrote: »

BobCesca wrote: »

surrealitycheck wrote: »

i have never had no car

send car money pls

You live in London. You don't need a car.

I NEED HALP

You need Harry

Casual

Nova_C wrote: »

Casual wrote: »

what i want more than life itself is a good one of these

I have a 2009 Impreza.

It is awesome.

i like the imprezza in theory but i dont quite want to own one

too impractical and thirst

the legacy sport tourer is the right combo of looks, speed, economy and cargo space for me

SO MUCH WANT

Gim

Say, whatever happened with the Occupy movement?

evilbob

Nova_C wrote: »

Aww, evilbob

One day you'll grow up big and strong and have a car, too!

You're an Aussie, right? Holden makes some cool stuff.

They make it about an hour from my house.