Munkus BeaverYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPAregular
I am hoping they mean "made his name" and not "the funny anecdote on how John Smith became Han Solo"
Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
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Munkus BeaverYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPAregular
Otherwise it's gonna be something stupid like adopting a dead man's name or "hey you sure act on your own, a real solo guy."
"Yeah...Solo. I like the sound of that."
Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
Old Han occupied a special sweet spot (in that scenes with him could be light-hearted but he also had a dark streak to him)
Platy on
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Librarian's ghostLibrarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSporkRegistered Userregular
It it going to be like the beginning of Last Crusade where there is the guy dressed exactly like Indiana Jones and he gives his hat to young Indy at the end?
I am 100% sure this means they are going to show him doing the Kessel Run in 12 Parsecs, which will forever ruin that for me forever.
Bill Watterson knew what was up.
You only speak of the Noodle Incident. You never describe it.
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Munkus BeaverYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPAregular
How do they plan to make a family movie about a drug runner?
This should be the first hard-R film in the Star Wars franchise.
Han Solo just runnin' and gunnin' from the Empire/Bounty Hunters/Crime Lords and bangin' along the way.
See, one of the problems with Star Wars movies is that they lack a certain eroticism. What if we were to bring... an incredibly hot but skeptical female smuggler into the mix? And then that way, whenever Solo's not out blasting criminals because they smuggled drugs, he's back at the Millennium Falcon performing outrageous sexual experiments on her supple young body. Now, here's the twist, and there is a twist. We show it. We show all of it. Because what's the one major thing missing from all action movies these days, guys? Full penetration. Guys, we're going to show full penetration, and we're going to show a lot of it. I mean, we're talking, you know, graphic scenes of Han Solo really going to town on this hot, young smuggler. From behind, 69, anal, vaginal, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl-- all the hits, all the big ones, all the good ones. And then he smuggles drugs again. He's out blasting criminals. Then he's back to the Millennium Falcon for some more full penetration. Smuggles drugs, back to the Falcon, full penetration. Smuggling, penetration, smuggling, full penetration, smuggling, penetration... And this goes on and on, and back and forth for 90 or so minutes until the movie just sort of ends.
Zonugal on
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GustavFriend of GoatsSomewhere in the OzarksRegistered Userregular
In the Han Solo movie we also learn that the character that would take the name Han is also an empath. That's why when Leia tells him she loves him in ESB, he knows.
How do they plan to make a family movie about a drug runner?
This should be the first hard-R film in the Star Wars franchise.
Han Solo just runnin' and gunnin' from the Empire/Bounty Hunters/Crime Lords and bangin' along the way.
See, one of the problems with Star Wars movies is that they lack a certain eroticism. What if we were to bring... an incredibly hot but skeptical female smuggler into the mix? And then that way, whenever Solo's not out blasting criminals because they smuggled drugs, he's back at the Millennium Falcon performing outrageous sexual experiments on her supple young body. Now, here's the twist, and there is a twist. We show it. We show all of it. Because what's the one major thing missing from all action movies these days, guys? Full penetration. Guys, we're going to show full penetration, and we're going to show a lot of it. I mean, we're talking, you know, graphic scenes of Han Solo really going to town on this hot, young smuggler. From behind, 69, anal, vaginal, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl-- all the hits, all the big ones, all the good ones. And then he smuggled drugs again. He's out blasting criminals. Then he's back to the Millennium Falcon for some more full penetration. Smuggled drugs, back to the Falcon, full penetration. Smuggling, penetration, smuggling, full penetration, smuggling, penetration... And this goes on and on, and back and forth for 90 or so minutes until the movie just sort of ends.
This is an Uwe Boll quote/paraphrase, right?
Children's rights are human rights.
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DepressperadoI just wanted to see you laughingin the pizza rainRegistered Userregular
How do they plan to make a family movie about a drug runner?
This should be the first hard-R film in the Star Wars franchise.
Han Solo just runnin' and gunnin' from the Empire/Bounty Hunters/Crime Lords and bangin' along the way.
See, one of the problems with Star Wars movies is that they lack a certain eroticism. What if we were to bring... an incredibly hot but skeptical female smuggler into the mix? And then that way, whenever Solo's not out blasting criminals because they smuggled drugs, he's back at the Millennium Falcon performing outrageous sexual experiments on her supple young body. Now, here's the twist, and there is a twist. We show it. We show all of it. Because what's the one major thing missing from all action movies these days, guys? Full penetration. Guys, we're going to show full penetration, and we're going to show a lot of it. I mean, we're talking, you know, graphic scenes of Han Solo really going to town on this hot, young smuggler. From behind, 69, anal, vaginal, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl-- all the hits, all the big ones, all the good ones. And then he smuggled drugs again. He's out blasting criminals. Then he's back to the Millennium Falcon for some more full penetration. Smuggled drugs, back to the Falcon, full penetration. Smuggling, penetration, smuggling, full penetration, smuggling, penetration... And this goes on and on, and back and forth for 90 or so minutes until the movie just sort of ends.
They're already doing the story of how he met Chewbacca and got the Falcon, two things I ALSO never needed to know
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
It it going to be like the beginning of Last Crusade where there is the guy dressed exactly like Indiana Jones and he gives his hat to young Indy at the end?
It's going to be like the end of Last Crusade and his dad is going to tell Lando they named the dog "Han"
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Zonugal(He/Him) The Holiday ArmadilloI'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered Userregular
It it going to be like the beginning of Last Crusade where there is the guy dressed exactly like Indiana Jones and he gives his hat to young Indy at the end?
If they are going to include all of this backstory bullshit, this is the ideal way to do it.
They're already doing the story of how he met Chewbacca and got the Falcon, two things I ALSO never needed to know
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
None of those things bother me individually but combined they paint the picture of prequel-box checking. Turns out every single cool thing hinted at in a characters backstory was just one really crazy week.
nightmarenny on
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SixCaches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhexRegistered Userregular
They're already doing the story of how he met Chewbacca and got the Falcon, two things I ALSO never needed to know
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
None of those thing bother me individually but combined they paint the picture of prequel-box checking. Turns out every single cool thing hinted at in a characters backstory was just one really crazy week.
They're already doing the story of how he met Chewbacca and got the Falcon, two things I ALSO never needed to know
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
None of those thing bother me individually but combined they paint the picture of prequel-box checking. Turns out every single cool thing hinted at in a characters backstory was just one really crazy week.
They're already doing the story of how he met Chewbacca and got the Falcon, two things I ALSO never needed to know
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
None of those things bother me individually but combined they paint the picture of prequel-box checking. Turns out every single cool thing hinted at in a characters backstory was just one really crazy week.
Well, over the course of 6 years, but still
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Munkus BeaverYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPAregular
I mean, what the movies have established is that Han won the Falcon in a card game from Lando (it is possible that he cheated) and he did unknown things to possibly piss off Lando. Or did he?
See, that's one issue I have with a Han prequel movie. It's that Lando's line from Empire and Han's shit eating grin all lose the ambiguity. Ambiguity is good, dammit.
Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
They're already doing the story of how he met Chewbacca and got the Falcon, two things I ALSO never needed to know
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
None of those things bother me individually but combined they paint the picture of prequel-box checking. Turns out every single cool thing hinted at in a characters backstory was just one really crazy week.
Well, over the course of 6 years, but still
If its actually six years I will be thrilled. Im sick of movies that try to tell a story in a week. Thor becomes such a better movie if he's just trapped on earth for like half a year. I'm not very confident that they'll really do that though. And until I see the movie I'm going in expecting the main story to take a few days and everything else to be flashbacks.
nightmarenny on
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SixCaches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhexRegistered Userregular
They're already doing the story of how he met Chewbacca and got the Falcon, two things I ALSO never needed to know
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
None of those thing bother me individually but combined they paint the picture of prequel-box checking. Turns out every single cool thing hinted at in a characters backstory was just one really crazy week.
You make me sad
It might not be! Thats just my concern.
It's plausibility saddens me.
I think Rogue One played things too generically and it had a way easier story to tell. I liked it, but it did feel like someone's Star Wars RPG campaign and the moments I remember are the badass blasty bits, less about the characters or the story.
I worry a Han Solo movie will be about set pieces that riff on things we already know happened like the Kessel run and meeting Chewy and why there's a life debt and meeting Lando and winning the Falcon and where he got his trusty DL-44 and where he got his stupid stripey pants and you know what there's your movie.
Six on
can you feel the struggle within?
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Munkus BeaverYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPAregular
I think Rogue One's biggest success was that it used unestablished characters and did not mess with any elements of established characters in the process.
Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
They're already doing the story of how he met Chewbacca and got the Falcon, two things I ALSO never needed to know
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
None of those things bother me individually but combined they paint the picture of prequel-box checking. Turns out every single cool thing hinted at in a characters backstory was just one really crazy week.
Well, over the course of 6 years, but still
If its actually six years I will be thrilled. Im sick of movies that try to tell a story in a week. Thor become such a better movie if he's just trapped on earth for like half a year. I'm not very confident that they'll really do that though. And until I see the movie I'm going in expecting the main story to take a few days and everything else to be flashbacks.
The CEO of Disney says it is 6 years so, it is gonna be 6 years
They're already doing the story of how he met Chewbacca and got the Falcon, two things I ALSO never needed to know
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
None of those things bother me individually but combined they paint the picture of prequel-box checking. Turns out every single cool thing hinted at in a characters backstory was just one really crazy week.
Well, over the course of 6 years, but still
If its actually six years I will be thrilled. Im sick of movies that try to tell a story in a week. Thor become such a better movie if he's just trapped on earth for like half a year. I'm not very confident that they'll really do that though. And until I see the movie I'm going in expecting the main story to take a few days and everything else to be flashbacks.
The CEO of Disney says it is 6 years so, it is gonna be 6 years
Im not saying he's wrong. Just that my definition and his may be different. If 90% of the movie takes place when he's 24 and at the beginning section he is 18 with a time cut between thats technically 6 years but it doesnt satisfy me.
Posts
Turns out everyone in the Star Wars universe is born with boring names like Todd Johnson, and have to earn their weird-ass space names later.
"Yeah...Solo. I like the sound of that."
Yeah it's a really clever post. I'm a cool person
Old Han occupied a special sweet spot (in that scenes with him could be light-hearted but he also had a dark streak to him)
This should be the first hard-R film in the Star Wars franchise.
Han Solo just runnin' and gunnin' from the Empire/Bounty Hunters/Crime Lords and bangin' along the way.
Bill Watterson knew what was up.
You only speak of the Noodle Incident. You never describe it.
God, I hope not.
Maybe dumping the Hutt's goods to escape an Imperial blockade? Sure. But not the Kessel Run.
goddamnit I miss bill watterson
See, one of the problems with Star Wars movies is that they lack a certain eroticism. What if we were to bring... an incredibly hot but skeptical female smuggler into the mix? And then that way, whenever Solo's not out blasting criminals because they smuggled drugs, he's back at the Millennium Falcon performing outrageous sexual experiments on her supple young body. Now, here's the twist, and there is a twist. We show it. We show all of it. Because what's the one major thing missing from all action movies these days, guys? Full penetration. Guys, we're going to show full penetration, and we're going to show a lot of it. I mean, we're talking, you know, graphic scenes of Han Solo really going to town on this hot, young smuggler. From behind, 69, anal, vaginal, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl-- all the hits, all the big ones, all the good ones. And then he smuggles drugs again. He's out blasting criminals. Then he's back to the Millennium Falcon for some more full penetration. Smuggles drugs, back to the Falcon, full penetration. Smuggling, penetration, smuggling, full penetration, smuggling, penetration... And this goes on and on, and back and forth for 90 or so minutes until the movie just sort of ends.
This is an Uwe Boll quote/paraphrase, right?
I love you
Empire already explained he won the Falcon off of Lando and how much more do we need really? Him meeting Chewie I'm ok with but my ideal Han Solo movie would just be him and Lando doing some shit and hijinks ensue. I don't need an origin story or something that ties into this greater narrative.
Steam
It's going to be like the end of Last Crusade and his dad is going to tell Lando they named the dog "Han"
If they are going to include all of this backstory bullshit, this is the ideal way to do it.
Cram it all into 15 minutes.
None of those things bother me individually but combined they paint the picture of prequel-box checking. Turns out every single cool thing hinted at in a characters backstory was just one really crazy week.
You make me sad
It might not be! Thats just my concern.
Well, over the course of 6 years, but still
See, that's one issue I have with a Han prequel movie. It's that Lando's line from Empire and Han's shit eating grin all lose the ambiguity. Ambiguity is good, dammit.
If its actually six years I will be thrilled. Im sick of movies that try to tell a story in a week. Thor becomes such a better movie if he's just trapped on earth for like half a year. I'm not very confident that they'll really do that though. And until I see the movie I'm going in expecting the main story to take a few days and everything else to be flashbacks.
It's plausibility saddens me.
I think Rogue One played things too generically and it had a way easier story to tell. I liked it, but it did feel like someone's Star Wars RPG campaign and the moments I remember are the badass blasty bits, less about the characters or the story.
I worry a Han Solo movie will be about set pieces that riff on things we already know happened like the Kessel run and meeting Chewy and why there's a life debt and meeting Lando and winning the Falcon and where he got his trusty DL-44 and where he got his stupid stripey pants and you know what there's your movie.
Im not saying he's wrong. Just that my definition and his may be different. If 90% of the movie takes place when he's 24 and at the beginning section he is 18 with a time cut between thats technically 6 years but it doesnt satisfy me.