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show me your usenet fan letters

2

Posts

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    The Green Eyed MonsterThe Green Eyed Monster i blame hip hop Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dear Kate Beckinsale,

    Did food sleep with your ex-boyfriend or something? Did it like put sugar in your gas tank or something? Borrow money and never pay you back or what? No matter what it did, I really think you should give food a second chance. It's actually pretty cool once you get to know it.

    Sincerely,
    celery

    The Green Eyed Monster on
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    FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    Dear Douglas Adams,

    I hope you don't die.

    Love,
    Lord Dave
    I'm filled with such regret. He died when I was 13, not too long before I first read the guide.

    its just


    ugh

    :x:(

    Faricazy on
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    MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    dear max brooks

    every time i realize that there will never be a zombie outbreak i die a little inside

    you give me hope

    regards,
    moriarty

    p.s. i love you

    Moriarty on
    will suck dick for shock images and videos
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    mullymully Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    <3 wrote: »
    Dear Mel Gibson

    I hope you make Passion of the Christ 2.

    Love,
    Heart

    Oh man.

    How Jesus Got His Groove Back

    mully on
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    FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dynagrip wrote: »
    Mel Brooks movies aren't that funny.
    this is false

    hey so it seems they're making a spaceballs cartoon

    cool

    Faricazy on
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    scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    celery77 wrote: »
    celery77 wrote: »
    mark ruffalo? seriously?
    He was pretty good in that movie about married couples and infidelity, I forget its name now, and some other one about a threesome whose name I also forget.

    Was he the guy in Zodiac? Because that was fucking excellent.
    Coulda been. I'd check imdb but I'm lazy. The threesome one was really good, I'd recommend it. The filmmaker's name was "Austin Chick", that's what I really remember.

    After searching imdb the title is XX/XY and Ruffalo was in Zodiac.

    scarlet st. on
    japsig.jpg
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    sponospono Mining for Nose Diamonds Booger CoveRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    why do I get the feeling it'll last about as long as the clerks cartoon?

    spono on
    640qocnq4ske.gif
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    SupramanSupraman Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dear Internet,

    WHY AM I SO BALD ??!!

    Bald, Tycho

    Supraman on
    Sellin my comics. PM for huge list and low low prices. this the is craaaaazy supraman suprasale. All TPBs. over 142 trades. Marvel DC Image.
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    mullymully Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    spono wrote: »
    why do I get the feeling it'll last about as long as the clerks cartoon?
    As long as it's just as good, I'm happy
    (I loved that cartoon. Man.)

    mully on
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    FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    spono wrote: »
    why do I get the feeling it'll last about as long as the clerks cartoon?
    cause it's gonna be awesome and people hate awesome

    although mel brooks is kinda a lot more prominent than kevin smith

    so fingers crossed

    Faricazy on
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    scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Supraman wrote: »
    Dear Internet,

    WHY AM I SO BALD ??!!

    Bald, Tycho

    What's with people fucking up the quote

    scarlet st. on
    japsig.jpg
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    MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    dear black people

    i'm sorry for what my ancestors did to you

    sincerely,
    moriarty

    p.s. NOT

    Moriarty on
    will suck dick for shock images and videos
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    SupramanSupraman Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    mully wrote: »
    spono wrote: »
    why do I get the feeling it'll last about as long as the clerks cartoon?
    As long as it's just as good, I'm happy
    (I loved that cartoon. Man.)

    The one where they keep getting stuck in freezers is my favorite

    Supraman on
    Sellin my comics. PM for huge list and low low prices. this the is craaaaazy supraman suprasale. All TPBs. over 142 trades. Marvel DC Image.
  • Options
    sponospono Mining for Nose Diamonds Booger CoveRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Supraman wrote: »
    mully wrote: »
    spono wrote: »
    why do I get the feeling it'll last about as long as the clerks cartoon?
    As long as it's just as good, I'm happy
    (I loved that cartoon. Man.)

    The one where they keep getting stuck in freezers is my favorite

    Why are we walking like this?

    spono on
    640qocnq4ske.gif
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    MarathonMarathon Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dear Edna,
    Your photo took my breath away. Truly yours is a butt that won't quit.
    Yesterday morning, I put your picture up in my garage to inspire me while
    I gapped my spark plugs.

    Woodrow

    Marathon on
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    scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Marathon wrote: »
    Dear Edna,
    Your photo took my breath away. Truly yours is a butt that won't quit.
    Yesterday morning, I put your picture up in my garage to inspire me while
    I gapped my spark plugs.

    Woodrow

    ahahaha

    <3

    scarlet st. on
    japsig.jpg
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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Marathon wrote: »
    Dear Edna,
    Your photo took my breath away. Truly yours is a butt that won't quit.
    Yesterday morning, I put your picture up in my garage to inspire me while
    I gapped my spark plugs.

    Woodrow

    :^:

    #pipe on
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    Lord DaveLord Dave Grief Causer Bitch Free ZoneRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dear John Ritter,

    I hope you don't die.

    Love,
    Lord Dave




    Dear Marathon,

    :^:

    Love,
    Lord Dave

    Lord Dave on
    mkc.png
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    scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    #pipe wrote: »
    Marathon wrote: »
    Dear Edna,
    Your photo took my breath away. Truly yours is a butt that won't quit.
    Yesterday morning, I put your picture up in my garage to inspire me while
    I gapped my spark plugs.

    Woodrow

    :^:

    futuramasigzr5.jpg

    Is this from that same girl who got hired after doing anime simpsons

    because I'll choke a bitch

    scarlet st. on
    japsig.jpg
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    msuitepyonmsuitepyon Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Mr. President:

    I just got back from the dress rehearsal of the play. Don't waste your time going...

    <3,
    msuitepyon

    msuitepyon on
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    mullymully Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    dear celery

    you seem pretty rad, maybe we can hang out some time

    -m.

    mully on
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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Is this from that same girl who got hired after doing anime simpsons

    because I'll choke a bitch

    I doubt it, from what I remember the simpsons one was a very different style.
    I have no idea who did this, I just found it randomly on the intertron.

    #pipe on
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    scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Yeah, I just figured she took the pain in a different direction.

    scarlet st. on
    japsig.jpg
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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I love it.
    Bender is so rad and zoidberg looks fucking harsh.

    I probably wont keep it as a sig for long.

    #pipe on
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    Grandaddy DeliciousGrandaddy Delicious Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dear Emma Watson,
    You have truly hurt me. In response to your filed lawsuit and resulting restraining order, I have constructed my own (see: attached). I consider us even, though I still miss my black t-shirt.
    restraining.jpg

    Grandaddy Delicious on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    #pipe wrote: »
    I love it.
    Bender is so rad and zoidberg looks fucking harsh.

    I probably wont keep it as a sig for long.

    Looks like Leela has two eyes :/

    scarlet st. on
    japsig.jpg
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    Kool-Aid GuyKool-Aid Guy Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dear Stimpy,

    You are my favorite cartoon character. You are my hero! But why do you hang around with that mean ol' thing all the time? What is he anyway, a rat? Anyways,

    XOXOXO
    Little Cindy

    Kool-Aid Guy on
    OH YEEEAAAAHHH
  • Options
    KrysanthemumKrysanthemum Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    #pipe wrote: »
    Dear Dr Pepper

    You're awesome and delicious.
    Please come back to Australia, we miss you. I know some people said mean things about you, but they're just jealous.

    Miss you
    Pipe.

    Dear Dr Pepper,

    What this guy said. I mean, we just got Tasty Toobs back, just bring back Dr Pepper and there'd be many, many junkfood joygasms.

    Yours,
    Kryss.

    Krysanthemum on
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    ColdbrandColdbrand Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dear Imposter Kool-Aid Guy,
    He's a CHIHUAHUA !

    You son of a bitch, no, YOU IDIOT, YOU STUPID FILTHY IDIOT!

    With overt fandom for Ren,
    Coldbrand

    Coldbrand on
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    FishMistFishMist Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    #pipe wrote: »
    Dear Dr Pepper

    You're awesome and delicious.
    Please come back to Australia, we miss you. I know some people said mean things about you, but they're just jealous.

    Miss you
    Pipe.

    pipe - do you live in Sydney? Dunno if there are any anywhere else, but Westfield Miranda has a shop called "Sugar Fix" that sells imported stuff. Dr Pepper is available, but be prepared to pay out the ass.

    FishMist on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    Filler Inc.Filler Inc. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dear Conan O'Brien,

    My name is ________, and I am your biggest fan. Enclosed in this envolpe is $1.75. Why a buck seventy five? Because I enjoy slurpees, and I bet you do too. So I'm buying you one. The only request I have is that you take a picture of you enjoying it, and send it back to me. Along with the straw your supple irish lips hugged. Please try and leave as much saliva and warmth on the straw as possible. It will go great with the hair clippings of yours I have.

    Your biggest fan,

    Conan O'Brien.

    Filler Inc. on
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    StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    #pipe wrote: »
    I love it.
    Bender is so rad and zoidberg looks fucking harsh.

    I probably wont keep it as a sig for long.

    Looks like Leela has two eyes :/

    I believe she has an eyepatch over one, but still.

    Straightzi on
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    JordynJordyn Really, Commander? Probing Uranus. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dudes when I was little, I totally sent a fan letter to Warren Moon.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
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    BusterKBusterK Negativity is Boring Cynicism is Cowardice Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Jordyn wrote: »
    Dudes when I was little, I totally sent a fan letter to Warren Moon.
    Silly Jordon
    Warren Moon isn't real

    BusterK on
    Visit http://www.cruzflores.com for all your Cruz Flores needs. Also listen to the podcast I do with Penguin Incarnate http://wgsgshow.podomatic.com
    Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
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    WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Jordyn wrote: »
    Dudes when I was little, I totally sent a fan letter to Warren Moon.

    OMG I used to love him when he QB'd for Houston!

    Weaver on
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    BusterKBusterK Negativity is Boring Cynicism is Cowardice Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Weaver wrote: »
    Jordyn wrote: »
    Dudes when I was little, I totally sent a fan letter to Warren Moon.

    OMG I used to love him when he QB'd for Houston!

    Oh he's a football player?
    I thought Warren Moon was one of the The Flash's names

    BusterK on
    Visit http://www.cruzflores.com for all your Cruz Flores needs. Also listen to the podcast I do with Penguin Incarnate http://wgsgshow.podomatic.com
    Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
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    JordynJordyn Really, Commander? Probing Uranus. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    he totally sent me back a signed picture, it's in South Dakota amidst all my Vikings crap.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
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    FishMistFishMist Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Coldbrand wrote: »
    Dear Imposter Kool-Aid Guy,
    He's a CHIHUAHUA !

    You son of a bitch, no, YOU IDIOT, YOU STUPID FILTHY IDIOT!

    With overt fandom for Ren,
    Coldbrand


    ...dude, he's quoting a fan letter to Stimpy from the episode "Stimpy's Fan Club".

    FishMist on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Jordyn wrote: »
    he totally sent me back a signed picture, it's in South Dakota amidst all my Vikings crap.

    I used ot have a whole bunch of his cards but when I hit the point in my life when I started turning dead inside I tossed them all.

    :(

    Weaver on
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    Kool-Aid GuyKool-Aid Guy Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    FishMist wrote: »
    Coldbrand wrote: »
    Dear Imposter Kool-Aid Guy,
    He's a CHIHUAHUA !

    You son of a bitch, no, YOU IDIOT, YOU STUPID FILTHY IDIOT!

    With overt fandom for Ren,
    Coldbrand


    ...dude, he's quoting a fan letter to Stimpy from the episode "Stimpy's Fan Club".

    I don't think I've ever laughed as hard as when Ren goes batshit crazy in that episode.

    "With these hands, I control the fate of millions! With these, dirty hands..."

    Kool-Aid Guy on
    OH YEEEAAAAHHH
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