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Dildos, three ways, and bisected skulls [101 Uses for Dildo's, other than fucking]

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Posts

  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited May 2007
    consciously I realize that they are of sturdy craftsmanship, but there is nothing more horrifying than the idea of a glass dildo exploding in my nether regions

    hahaha

    man, they're made of fucking pyrex

    those things are crazy, crazy tough

    you could beat a dude made of concrete to death with them

    which, in a funny sort of way, kind of brings us back to the original topic

    Rankenphile on
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  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Cause I don't want some piece of trash catalog dildo penetrating my holiest of holies. Only the best name brands will do.

    Javen on
  • JimmyJimmy __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    consciously I realize that they are of sturdy craftsmanship, but there is nothing more horrifying than the idea of a glass dildo exploding in my nether regions

    Thats bad, but the first dildos were reportedly made from wood. Im not sure what would be worse..shards of glass or splinters.

    Jimmy on
  • Brodo FagginsBrodo Faggins Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Knighting sword.

    Brodo Faggins on
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  • OrikaeshigitaeOrikaeshigitae Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited May 2007
  • World as MythWorld as Myth a breezy way to annoy serious people Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    consciously I realize that they are of sturdy craftsmanship, but there is nothing more horrifying than the idea of a glass dildo exploding in my nether regions

    hahaha

    man, they're made of fucking pyrex

    those things are crazy, crazy tough

    you could beat a dude made of concrete to death with them

    which, in a funny sort of way, kind of brings us back to the original topic
    really? A dude made of concrete? I will have to reconsider my position on this

    World as Myth on
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  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I worked at a porn shop for a year after HS, and I can tell you right now, the cheaper shit will fuck you up if not dipped and rested in disinfectant.

    I met so many men and women that had horrific infections from unclean toys, or toys that held on to funky shit and redeposited it after muating into horrible little creatures.

    glass or silicone. Nothing else, ever.

    I actually talked to a chck that almost got killed becasue she used a toy anally, washed it off, let it sit in a drawer for a week, then used it vaginally and contracted a strain of E-Coli.

    Stale on
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  • ThuleThule Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    gandalfo4bj.gif

    Thule on
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited May 2007
    Stale wrote: »
    I worked at a porn shop for a year after HS, and I can tell you right now, the cheaper shit will fuck you up if not dipped and rested in disinfectant.

    I met so many men and women that had horrific infections from unclean toys, or toys that held on to funky shit and redeposited it after muating into horrible little creatures.

    glass or silicone. Nothing else, ever.

    I actually talked to a chck that almost got killed becasue she used a toy anally, washed it off, let it sit in a drawer for a week, then used it vaginally and contracted a strain of E-Coli.

    yes

    this

    exactly this

    porous is baaaaaaaaaad

    Rankenphile on
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  • World as MythWorld as Myth a breezy way to annoy serious people Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Stale wrote: »
    glass or silicone. Nothing else, ever.
    silicone I can dig.

    World as Myth on
    kQwcZLJ.png
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    If I leave my current job, I think I may try going back to the porn-shop business.

    Crazy money to be had. Plus it was fun as hell most nights if you just relaxed a bit.

    Stale on
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  • JordynJordyn Really, Commander? Probing Uranus. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Man, there is nasty stuff in your butt.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Jordyn wrote: »
    Man, there is nasty stuff in your butt.

    liar, I just had an enema

    Stale on
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  • OrikaeshigitaeOrikaeshigitae Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited May 2007
    i love how once in a while we get all sex-ed

    i like this forum

    Orikaeshigitae on
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited May 2007
    Jordyn wrote: »
    Man, there is nasty stuff in your butt.

    speak for yourself

    I'm all full of skittles up there

    a rainbow of fruit flavors, jordyn

    a rainbow

    Rankenphile on
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  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    i love how once in a while we get all sex-ed

    i like this forum

    When you spend as much time balls deep in anuses as we do, you learn a few things

    Stale on
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  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Just shit that rainbow right in my mouth.

    Defender on
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited May 2007
    Defender wrote: »
    Just shit that rainbow right in my mouth.

    this is one of the reasons I love you so much, defender

    every once in a while, you say the world's most quotable-out-of-context things

    Rankenphile on
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  • ThuleThule Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    speaking of foreign objects found in rectal passages:
    I remember reading in a surgical journal some years ago about the extraction of a jar of maraschino cherries from a man's rectum. Being a glass jar, and large, there were problems getting purchase (in the grasping, not the monetary sense: presumably it had already been paid for), and there was concern about breaking it. Performing some sort of version maneuver, they unscrewed the cap, emptied out the cherries, and grabbed the lip of the jar for a successful end of the case. The icing on the cake, the cherry on top. But it wasn't the process that impressed me; it was the apparent credulity with which the authors reported the mechanism of entry in the first place. The man, so they explained, had been camping and had, in answering the call of his lower intestine, sat on a branch to perform the evacuation. The branch broke, and, as luck would have it, he'd been unknowingly positioned exactly above an upright jar of cherries, and landed orificially straight upon it.

    http://surgeonsblog.blogspot.com/search/label/rectal%20foreign%20bodies%3B%20FFA%3B%20maraschino%20cherries%3B%20anus

    Thule on
  • OrikaeshigitaeOrikaeshigitae Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited May 2007
    Thule wrote: »
    speaking of foreign objects found in rectal passages:
    I remember reading in a surgical journal some years ago about the extraction of a jar of maraschino cherries from a man's rectum. Being a glass jar, and large, there were problems getting purchase (in the grasping, not the monetary sense: presumably it had already been paid for), and there was concern about breaking it. Performing some sort of version maneuver, they unscrewed the cap, emptied out the cherries, and grabbed the lip of the jar for a successful end of the case. The icing on the cake, the cherry on top. But it wasn't the process that impressed me; it was the apparent credulity with which the authors reported the mechanism of entry in the first place. The man, so they explained, had been camping and had, in answering the call of his lower intestine, sat on a branch to perform the evacuation. The branch broke, and, as luck would have it, he'd been unknowingly positioned exactly above an upright jar of cherries, and landed orificially straight upon it.

    http://surgeonsblog.blogspot.com/search/label/rectal%20foreign%20bodies%3B%20FFA%3B%20maraschino%20cherries%3B%20anus
    No ordinary candle this: probably three inches in diameter, it was over a foot long. How his colon accepted it without tearing, I can't say; I'd guess it had had practice. The upper end of the candle disappeared behind the lower edge of his ribs. Prodigious.

    oh my

    Orikaeshigitae on
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I sold a dildo much that size named "Manowar".


    Very popular with older gay gentlemen and very obese mothers. I always cried a little inside when I sold another horse-cock.

    Stale on
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  • OrikaeshigitaeOrikaeshigitae Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited May 2007
    that is an excellent blog

    Orikaeshigitae on
  • ThuleThule Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    that is an excellent blog

    Don't start getting any ideas now...

    Thule on
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Defender wrote: »
    Just shit that rainbow right in my mouth.

    this is one of the reasons I love you so much, defender

    every once in a while, you say the world's most quotable-out-of-context things

    <3

    Every once in a while I see one of those phrases in a sig and I'm like "what the fuck was I talking about?"

    Defender on
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