Strange & Embarrassing Moments Mk. II

Thanatos

4 years of living in a suite with, at most, 5 other people sharing a bathroom (and knowing each and every one of them) must have really spoiled me.

TheFid2

It was just the complete randomness that threw me. Normally, I'd be up for it (although maybe not with another guy in the room per se) but it was completely emotionless. Like... no kissing. Just me fingering her while we watched Jimmy Kimmel Live (we couldn't find the remote) and no one saying a thing. It was very surreal, even looking back.

The wierd part is, she then dated my roommate for most of the year. And turned out to be a stuck-up bitch who ruined his life for months.

HF-kun

aquabat wrote:

I read a porn store clerks blog once that had a rant on people who leave thumb prints of jizz on porn dvd's

That would be the best piece of evidence in court. Ever.

MasterDebater

I think I have the baseline against which all awkward and embarassing moments can be judged.


Over the summer, I was going with a friend (I'll call him "J") to another friend's place for a LAN party, but we were in charge of the food, so we stopped by the grocery store. We got out of the car and J noticed a guy he had known from one of his classes. We went up to him, and I will never forget the conversation:
J: Hey man! How's it going?
FRIEND: Oh...not too good...the tumor's spread to the brain now.
J: Oh...I'm sorry.
FRIEND: Yeah, they say it doesn't look too good.
J: Hey, this is my friend MasterDebater
ME: Um...hi?
FRIEND: Hey, nice to meet you! (his dad beckons and he walks away)

aquabat

MasterDebater wrote:

I think I have the baseline against which all awkward and embarassing moments can be judged.


Over the summer, I was going with a friend (I'll call him "J") to another friend's place for a LAN party, but we were in charge of the food, so we stopped by the grocery store. We got out of the car and J noticed a guy he had known from one of his classes. We went up to him, and I will never forget the conversation:
J: Hey man! How's it going?
FRIEND: Oh...not too good...the tumor's spread to the brain now.
J: Oh...I'm sorry.
FRIEND: Yeah, they say it doesn't look too good.
J: Hey, this is my friend MasterDebater
ME: Um...hi?
FRIEND: Hey, nice to meet you! (his dad beckons and he walks away)

I dont know man... we've had almost 18 months and almost 200 pages of embarrassing moments.

Menace

aquabat wrote:

MasterDebater wrote:

I think I have the baseline against which all awkward and embarassing moments can be judged.


Over the summer, I was going with a friend (I'll call him "J") to another friend's place for a LAN party, but we were in charge of the food, so we stopped by the grocery store. We got out of the car and J noticed a guy he had known from one of his classes. We went up to him, and I will never forget the conversation:
J: Hey man! How's it going?
FRIEND: Oh...not too good...the tumor's spread to the brain now.
J: Oh...I'm sorry.
FRIEND: Yeah, they say it doesn't look too good.
J: Hey, this is my friend MasterDebater
ME: Um...hi?
FRIEND: Hey, nice to meet you! (his dad beckons and he walks away)

I dont know man... we've had almost 18 months and almost 200 pages of embarrassing moments.

Yeah, that's actually very tame compared to much of this thread.

Martman

Menace wrote:

aquabat wrote:

MasterDebater wrote:

I think I have the baseline against which all awkward and embarassing moments can be judged.


Over the summer, I was going with a friend (I'll call him "J") to another friend's place for a LAN party, but we were in charge of the food, so we stopped by the grocery store. We got out of the car and J noticed a guy he had known from one of his classes. We went up to him, and I will never forget the conversation:
J: Hey man! How's it going?
FRIEND: Oh...not too good...the tumor's spread to the brain now.
J: Oh...I'm sorry.
FRIEND: Yeah, they say it doesn't look too good.
J: Hey, this is my friend MasterDebater
ME: Um...hi?
FRIEND: Hey, nice to meet you! (his dad beckons and he walks away)

I dont know man... we've had almost 18 months and almost 200 pages of embarrassing moments.

Yeah, that's actually very tame compared to much of this thread.

See, the embarrassing part is that his friend referred to him by his PA name.

DouglasDanger

Having to clean bathrooms at a state park for two summer really changed my world view. Most people are fucking hogs who have no respect for other people.

Rear Admiral Choco

Reminds me of the time I had to use the school bathroom. Normally I don't on principle, and what I saw in there has made me decide to never even so much as think about using a public bathroom. The entire floor was flooded in piss. D:

sp1ttle

I avoid public public restrooms for the same reason. It seems as if people were deliberately aiming at anywhere but the urinals.

Thanatos

You two both need to not be such pussies. The bottom of your shoe is filthy, anyhow, so why worry about it?

Moriarty

last night i went to my friend's apartment for some drunken shenanigans.

there are two strange parts to this story:

1. i did not drink much and therefore did absolutely nothing stupid whatsoever.

2. my friend got really drunk and was lying on the bed. suddenly and without warning, he rolls off of the bed, uppercuts me in the balls, stands up and just claws my goddamn face, cutting me above my lip and on my nose with his fingernails. i told him to cut it out and he did for a couple minutes but then he was doing it again. i told him that last time he did it he cut my face and i was bleeding. he was like, "really?" and leans in and looks at my face. as soon as he sees the blood, he starts bawling like a little girl and is hugging me saying, "oh my god! i'm so sorry!" later on in the night i said something to his girlfriend. like, wasn't hitting on her at all. he swings at me and i'm like, "dude, what the fuck?" he tells me, "man, you are encroaching on my unf!" and then he gestures to his cock. "so i'm talking to your girlfriend?" "yeah! that's it!"

guess i got a taste of my own stupid, drunken medicine.

DouglasDanger

Most public bathrooms arent that dirty. Many college bathrooms are very disgusting though. In the one buildinging, there would freqently be puke everywhere. In the the sinks, on the chair the radio was on, in teh shower, etc. Never in the toilet though,

By contrast, the building I am now has very clean bathrooms. I also live in an on-campus apartment, so I have my own bathroom that I share with my three roomies.

Two of my guy friends once made out or exchanged man kisses on the way home from a bar, and then talked about it for the next several days. One of them is gay and one of them is straight (bi-curious?) and has a girlfriend. That was kind of awkward. One of the dudes is a good friend of mine that hangs out with me all the time, and the other is one of my roomies.

(I dont have any problems with gays at all. It was more awkward because of the guy having a girlfriend at the time. I would conisder that being unfaithful.)

S0up

There's this girl I know, and we're good friends. There is no sexual interest between us what so ever and people would even make jokes about us getting together just because it was very ironic. Anyways, two days ago it's about 2:45 AM, and I'm outside smoking my before sleep cigarette. Well, it was a little chilly outside, and even snowing a tad. But luckily I had enough clothes on so warmth was not a problem and the snow slowly falling was pretty nice looking. Over all, the moment was very serene. Then, I get a text message beep on my cellphone, and it's from that girl. The message read:

"I will even wear the fish net stockings you like and you can play with my feet while I rub your cock"

:shock:

Yeah, she sent it to the wrong person. Talk about a quick atmosphere change.

HF-kun

S0up wrote:

"I will even wear the fish net stockings you like and you can play with my feet while I rub your cock"

:shock:

Yeah, she sent it to the wrong person. Talk about a quick atmosphere change.

Hahaha, I'm always terrified about doing that.

"Man, that blowjob you gave me last night was fucking awesome!"
*Text Message Sent*
...
"Oh fuck my ass! That was my Mom's cell phone number!"

stilist

HF-kun wrote:

S0up wrote:

"I will even wear the fish net stockings you like and you can play with my feet while I rub your cock"

:shock:

Yeah, she sent it to the wrong person. Talk about a quick atmosphere change.

Hahaha, I'm always terrified about doing that.

"Man, that blowjob you gave me last night was fucking awesome!"
*Text Message Sent*
...
"Oh fuck my ass! That was my Mom's cell phone number!"

:winky:

DouglasDanger

rofl

Al_wat

Yeah, thats what public bathrooms are like for the most part; wretched. In the library at my university though, i've got this one stall that i always use. Middle one in the basement. Always clean.

The funny thing is I always write bullshit on the walls of that one stall, and other people do too. Then the things that were getting written looked strangely... familliar. Turns out by complete random chance like 3 of my friends use that same exact stall whenever they need to go in the library.

(the library has like 5 floors, lots of bathrooms).

DouglasDanger

fuck you for defacing property.

real_pochacco

Does anyone else like to read vandalism in bathrooms? I think it's pretty interesting/funny sometimes, especially when people start having conversations in it.

Tarranon

real_pochacco wrote:

Does anyone else like to read vandalism in bathrooms? I think it's pretty interesting/funny sometimes, especially when people start having conversations in it.

" ~Ray was here
~Ray is a faggot"

Years later, Ray returns and is shocked to discover someone called him a faggot in the interim.

Carl with a K

In my middle school, there was a bathroom on the second floor. People usually avoided this bathroom, and I was about to find out why. It was still September, the beginning of the school year. I walked in, and immediately I was overwhelmed by a smell. A smell of crap. I had thought maybe someone had taken a shit and not flushed, so I went into the stalls to flush the toilets. All of them were perfectly clean. Well, maybe someone had burritos for supper last night. Not a big deal. That's when I saw it. Out of the corner of my eye, a flash of brown. I looked up to see a GLOB OF SHIT hanging from the ceiling. I don't know how the fuck it got up there, and I really don't want to know. The worst part? The next time I went to use that bathroom-well after winter break-the fucking thing was STILL THERE. All dried up and shit. I don't use public bathrooms that much anymore.

aquabat

HF-kun wrote:

S0up wrote:

"I will even wear the fish net stockings you like and you can play with my feet while I rub your cock"

:shock:

Yeah, she sent it to the wrong person. Talk about a quick atmosphere change.

Hahaha, I'm always terrified about doing that.

"Man, that blowjob you gave me last night was fucking awesome!"
*Text Message Sent*
...
"Oh fuck my ass! That was my Mom's cell phone number!"

Theres gotta be tons of awkward 'sent message to the wrong person' stories around

Moriarty

you guys know those obnoxious commercials that are like "text 'joke' to 85050 for a hilarious joke that will improve your sense of humor - only ninety nine cents per joke!"

well, my friend did that tonight with my phone while i was in the bathroom.

this is the joke:

that goddamned text message wrote:

Male dodo to its wife: What do you mean, a headache? Were an endangered species!

we were in stitches.

DarkWarrior

Moriarty wrote:

you guys know those obnoxious commercials that are like "text 'joke' to 85050 for a hilarious joke that will improve your sense of humor - only ninety nine cents per joke!"

well, my friend did that tonight with my phone while i was in the bathroom.

this is the joke:

that goddamned text message wrote:

Male dodo to its wife: What do you mean, a headache? Were an endangered species!

we were in stitches.

BURN!

Moriarty

that's what i get for takin' a shit, i guess.

Carl with a K

The best part of the joke was the smiley face

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot

Is it sad that it actually took me like, two minutes to get that?

stilist

Cass wrote:

Is it sad that it actually took me like, two minutes to get that?

I think I get it, but I don't think it's funny.

HF-kun

Cass wrote:

Is it sad that it actually took me like, two minutes to get that?

I'm still trying to get it.

Rear Admiral Choco

I admit I laughed a little too hard at that.

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot

HF-kun wrote:

Cass wrote:

Is it sad that it actually took me like, two minutes to get that?

I'm still trying to get it.

The guy dodo wants to have sex with her.

stilist

Cass wrote:

HF-kun wrote:

Cass wrote:

Is it sad that it actually took me like, two minutes to get that?

I'm still trying to get it.

The guy dodo wants to have sex with her.

Oh. I guess I didn't get it then. Either way, I don't think it's funny.

HF-kun

Cass wrote:

HF-kun wrote:

Cass wrote:

Is it sad that it actually took me like, two minutes to get that?

I'm still trying to get it.

The guy dodo wants to have sex with her.

Oh.

















I never would have figured that out

Dread Pirate Arbuthnot

stilist wrote:

Cass wrote:

HF-kun wrote:

Cass wrote:

Is it sad that it actually took me like, two minutes to get that?

I'm still trying to get it.

The guy dodo wants to have sex with her.

Oh. I guess I didn't get it then. Either way, I don't think it's funny.

It's possible that due to the female dodo's headache, the entire species is now extinct.

I think it's a bit depressing.

Moriarty

i can't imagine any way of delivering that joke that would make it funny.

edit: unless, after the punchline, you smiley really creepily at the person you were telling it to.

Hacksaw

aquabat wrote:

Theres gotta be tons of awkward 'sent message to the wrong person' stories around

I got one. A buddy of mine mistakenly sent me this message a while back:

"Bring lots of towels tonight. You left alot of blood last time and it was hell to clean up. My roommates still don't believe that story I told them. They think I killed someone and you came over to help me dispose of the body."

I was pretty much o_O for a minute or so until I realized he'd meant to send it to his girlfriend.

As7

Hacksaw wrote:

aquabat wrote:

Theres gotta be tons of awkward 'sent message to the wrong person' stories around

I got one. A buddy of mine mistakenly sent me this message a while back:

"Bring lots of towels tonight. You left alot of blood last time and it was hell to clean up. My roommates still don't believe that story I told them. They think I killed someone and you came over to help me dispose of the body."

I was pretty much o_O for a minute or so until I realized he'd meant to send it to his girlfriend.

Period sex?

Rear Admiral Choco

Arsenic7 wrote:

Hacksaw wrote:

aquabat wrote:

Theres gotta be tons of awkward 'sent message to the wrong person' stories around

I got one. A buddy of mine mistakenly sent me this message a while back:

"Bring lots of towels tonight. You left alot of blood last time and it was hell to clean up. My roommates still don't believe that story I told them. They think I killed someone and you came over to help me dispose of the body."

I was pretty much o_O for a minute or so until I realized he'd meant to send it to his girlfriend.

Period sex?

That's what I guessed from it.

Hacksaw

Arsenic7 wrote:

Hacksaw wrote:

aquabat wrote:

Theres gotta be tons of awkward 'sent message to the wrong person' stories around

I got one. A buddy of mine mistakenly sent me this message a while back:

"Bring lots of towels tonight. You left alot of blood last time and it was hell to clean up. My roommates still don't believe that story I told them. They think I killed someone and you came over to help me dispose of the body."

I was pretty much o_O for a minute or so until I realized he'd meant to send it to his girlfriend.

Period sex?

Period sex. Or, for those of you who need a visual component, . sex.