Our new Indie Games subforum is now open for business in G&T. Go and check it out, you might land a code for a free game. If you're developing an indie game and want to post about it, follow these directions. If you don't, he'll break your legs! Hahaha! Seriously though.
Our rules have been updated and given their own forum. Go and look at them! They are nice, and there may be new ones that you didn't know about! Hooray for rules! Hooray for The System! Hooray for Conforming!

Strange & Embarrassing Moments Mk. II

15658606162

Posts

  • ImperfectImperfect Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
  • RandomEngyRandomEngy Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Story 1: Well once I had to drive to the Indianapolis airport from college (which was on the east side of Indiana). I'd never been there, so I ask how to get there, and get the pretty straightforward directions: get on 70, drive to Indy and you can't miss the signs to the airport. Great. Except I, for some reason, thought that Indianapolis was in Illinois. The state names were similar or something, I don't know. I leave pretty early to get there, and start driving west. After a while (about 40 minutes) I don't see any signs for Indy, and actually I see one for St. Louis. Getting distressed, I stop and consult my atlas, then berate myself while speeding all the way to the airport, where I barely catch my flight. Since then I check google maps or virtual earth religiously before going someplace new. I still feel like a retard for doing that.

    Story 2: More of sort of an ackward story here. Before the age of 12, I had a crazy habit of breaking bones. It happened 9 times, with arms, feet, wrists and legs. I can't remember all of them since I was very young for some.

    But a few months ago, I heard my dad tell me a new one. My mom had read somewhere that some toddlers had killed themselves playing near a birdbath by pulling the big concrete top part off onto themselves. She talked to my dad about it since we had one in our yard, but he wasn't too concerned. Until he saw me playing near the birdbath, sort of trying to look up in it by grabbing the edge. He rushed forward to get me off of it, but his grip broke my arm in the process.

    Knowing my dad, I'm certain that it was as he said, an accident. And I couldn't care less about it, especially because I was too young to remember. Also, I don't really mind that he didn't mention the incident until now. As a little kid, I probably wouldn't have been able to communicate that it was an accident very well. Having me going around saying "my dad broke my arm when I was little" would have been a little more trouble than it was worth.

    So here's the trouble. What do you say to that? I would feel really really crappy for accidentally breaking my son's arm. But if I mentioned that it could seem like a really scathing sarcastic remark, along the lines of "hah you felt bad? I had my arm broken!" So I just sort of said "huh, I didn't know about that" and kept quiet.

    Profile -> Signature Settings -> Hide signatures always. Then you don't have to read this worthless text anymore.
  • ImperfectImperfect Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    They called me... Mr. Glass.

  • yalborapyalborap Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Imperfect wrote:
    Hey man, try living it.

    =(

    You know what's sad?

    When I read that sttory, this thought process came to mind: "Was it in her or the wine bottle?"

  • real_pochaccoreal_pochacco Registered User
    edited December 2005
    yalborap wrote:
    Imperfect wrote:
    Hey man, try living it.

    =(

    You know what's sad?

    When I read that sttory, this thought process came to mind: "Was it in her or the wine bottle?"

    I had the same thought process. Cept without the in her part.

  • juggerbotjuggerbot Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Here's something that happened to me just now. Me and my roommate are watching that video of the octopus killing the shark in the aquarium. As we are watching it wrap its tentacles around the shark and thrash it about, we have the following conversation.

    Me: That's like the one way of dying I am most afraid of.
    Him: You mean like asphyxiation?
    Me: No.
    Him: Or drowning?
    Me: No, like being underwater and having an octupus or a squid come up and wrap its tentacles around you and maul you to death.
    Him: ...... o_O
    Me: What?

  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    so i'm up here in the city at my friend's house (same house where i beat up that guy before thanksgiving, for reference). last night this guy rob and i were standing around in the hallway while my friend and her sister got ready to go see chronicles of narnia.

    so my friend's sister is in the bathroom and the guy rob and i are standing around talking. there's a ten-second pause in our conversation and we're just sort of standing there fidgeting.

    all of a sudden, we hear the loudest shit come from the bathroom my friend's sister is in, followed quickly by a flush, as if she were trying to hide the flatulence with the flush but was a little off with the timing.

    rob and i were laughing for about ten minutes straight after that.

    i'd understand if you guys don't believe this story, though, since girls don't poo.

    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • Evil MultifariousEvil Multifarious Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Moriarty wrote:
    so i'm up here in the city at my friend's house (same house where i beat up that guy before thanksgiving, for reference). last night this guy rob and i were standing around in the hallway while my friend and her sister got ready to go see chronicles of narnia.

    so my friend's sister is in the bathroom and the guy rob and i are standing around talking. there's a ten-second pause in our conversation and we're just sort of standing there fidgeting.

    all of a sudden, we hear the loudest shit come from the bathroom my friend's sister is in, followed quickly by a flush, as if she were trying to hide the flatulence with the flush but was a little off with the timing.

    rob and i were laughing for about ten minutes straight after that.

    i'd understand if you guys don't believe this story, though, since girls don't poo.

    This is exactly why bathrooms should always be isolated from any high-traffic areas in the house. Everyone takes loud shits but it's still embarrassing if someone hears you.

    Inquisitor wrote: »
    I fucking hate you Canadians.
  • TaximesTaximes Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Not so embarrassing, but memorable:

    So, I recently broke up with my girlfriend and, last weekend, I went going to see the Chronicles of Narnia with a new ladyfriend. We're not dating, but...you know, there's interest.

    At any rate, I made the mistake of telling my friends about this. As ladyfriend and I are walking out of the theater after the movie, my two friends drive up to us in the parking lot and start circling us in their car with the windows down and What is Love? blasting.

    I just laughed. It would have been embarrassing if all of us weren't as comfortable with one another as we are, but as it stood, I just laughed and commended their dedication. :P

  • Salvation122Salvation122 Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    A friend of mine - Chris - was graduating from highschool last summer. We drove up to the parking lot during their rehearsal, wrote shit on the windows, saran-wrapped the car, and tied a blowup doll to the roof.

    Chris never saw the sex doll. Someone stole it and took it home before he got out of the building.

    sig.png
  • TaximesTaximes Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    I don't know how I forgot this story in my last post, considering it just happened, but here it is.

    So, that ladyfriend previously mentioned is at my house. We are admiring the Christmas tree when my cat walks past and I pick him up, explaining how he sometimes tries to climb it. Then, I jokingly pretend to put him on the tree. His response is not-so-joking, however, as he sprays his putrid cat-scent all over me. And it is rancid. If you have smelled this scent without gagging, I commend you.

    So, I go upstairs to remedy the situation with a quick change of clothes. It's not that bad, right? Well, it wouldn't have been...but what do I find when I get upstairs but cat barf everywhere. At least five seperate piles. It was not fucking there that morning. So, I change my clothes and spend about half an hour trying to rub the stuff out of the carpet.

    Luckily, ladyfriend is just laughing and taking it in stride. Finally, though, I finish and it's all cleaned. Assuring her I will be right back, I go to take my rancid old clothes down to the washer.

    And what happens there?

    I step in another pile of fresh cat barf.

    I'm no longer a cat person.

  • TenTen Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Taximes wrote:
    I don't know how I forgot this story in my last post, considering it just happened, but here it is.

    So, that ladyfriend previously mentioned is at my house. We are admiring the Christmas tree when my cat walks past and I pick him up, explaining how he sometimes tries to climb it. Then, I jokingly pretend to put him on the tree. His response is not-so-joking, however, as he sprays his putrid cat-scent all over me. And it is rancid. If you have smelled this scent without gagging, I commend you.

    So, I go upstairs to remedy the situation with a quick change of clothes. It's not that bad, right? Well, it wouldn't have been...but what do I find when I get upstairs but cat barf everywhere. At least five seperate piles. It was not fucking there that morning. So, I change my clothes and spend about half an hour trying to rub the stuff out of the carpet.

    Luckily, ladyfriend is just laughing and taking it in stride. Finally, though, I finish and it's all cleaned. Assuring her I will be right back, I go to take my rancid old clothes down to the washer.

    And what happens there?

    I step in a pile of fresh cat barf.

    Dude... what's wrong with your cat?

  • TaximesTaximes Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Well, we have three...and they have a tendency to run around the room when they start puking. So, it's really not so strange, I guess. Just very bad timing.

  • TenTen Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Taximes wrote:
    Well, we have three...and they have a tendency to run around the room when they start puking. So, it's really not so strange, I guess. Just very bad timing.

    But... why are they puking so much? I don't think that's normal...

  • Evil MultifariousEvil Multifarious Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Taximes wrote:
    Well, we have three...and they have a tendency to run around the room when they start puking. So, it's really not so strange, I guess. Just very bad timing.

    Dude, your cats have some kind of horrible disease.

    Inquisitor wrote: »
    I fucking hate you Canadians.
  • TaximesTaximes Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Meh...if one puked once, it could have caused those five piles. So...I guess they just got ahold of something they weren't supposed to eat (grass does that to them like no other, but still they try to escape and chew on it), and one let it loose all over my room while another did it in the basement.

    But anyway....

  • ImperfectImperfect Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Taximes wrote:
    Well, we have three...and they have a tendency to run around the room when they start puking. So, it's really not so strange, I guess. Just very bad timing.

    They run around puking? I know that's horrible, and I should feel terrible, but I can't help but laugh at the mental image of this cat running around, heaving chunks as it goes, unable to stop itself.

    "Ohgod I'm puking! Somebody help me! Sweet Jesus I can't stop! You! You over there! Make me stop! Ohgodagain...!"

    ...I'm a terrible man.

  • gibsgibs Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Taximes wrote:
    Meh...if one puked once, it could have caused those five piles. So...I guess they just got ahold of something they weren't supposed to eat (grass does that to them like no other, but still they try to escape and chew on it), and one let it loose all over my room while another did it in the basement.

    But anyway....
    I'm with Multifarious on this. Cats actually eat grass for the very purpose of throwing up. Your kittys sound like they're sick!

    http://www.pawsonline.info/grasseating.htm

  • HeirHeir Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Moriarty wrote:
    so i'm up here in the city at my friend's house (same house where i beat up that guy before thanksgiving, for reference). last night this guy rob and i were standing around in the hallway while my friend and her sister got ready to go see chronicles of narnia.

    so my friend's sister is in the bathroom and the guy rob and i are standing around talking. there's a ten-second pause in our conversation and we're just sort of standing there fidgeting.

    all of a sudden, we hear the loudest shit come from the bathroom my friend's sister is in, followed quickly by a flush, as if she were trying to hide the flatulence with the flush but was a little off with the timing.

    rob and i were laughing for about ten minutes straight after that.

    i'd understand if you guys don't believe this story, though, since girls don't poo.


    Of course, Girls don't poop, and when they pee, it's pink and smells like flowers..................and then I got married......

    camo_sig2.png
  • NofrikinfuNNofrikinfuN Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Heir03 wrote:
    Moriarty wrote:
    so i'm up here in the city at my friend's house (same house where i beat up that guy before thanksgiving, for reference). last night this guy rob and i were standing around in the hallway while my friend and her sister got ready to go see chronicles of narnia.

    so my friend's sister is in the bathroom and the guy rob and i are standing around talking. there's a ten-second pause in our conversation and we're just sort of standing there fidgeting.

    all of a sudden, we hear the loudest shit come from the bathroom my friend's sister is in, followed quickly by a flush, as if she were trying to hide the flatulence with the flush but was a little off with the timing.

    rob and i were laughing for about ten minutes straight after that.

    i'd understand if you guys don't believe this story, though, since girls don't poo.


    Of course, Girls don't poop, and when they pee, it's pink and smells like flowers..................and then I got married......

    No single untruth in my life, not even Santa Claus, disappointed me more than the above. Once they are comfortable enough to break wind in the same room as you, you're screwed. All of a sudden, the floodgates of gross goings-on occurs and nothing left in life is quite as beautiful again. :|

    But in all seriousness, ewie. I tend to avoid standing around populated bathrooms for such reasons. If I feel some noise coming on, I tend to blast the nearest faucet until things settle down.

  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    so last night i had way too much 151 and apparently when i was blacked out i decided it'd be a good idea of i put a cigar out on my hand.

    so now i have a fatty blister.

    gg, me.

    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • MartmanMartman Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Moriarty wrote:
    so last night i had way too much 151 and apparently when i was blacked out i decided it'd be a good idea of i put a cigar out on my hand.

    so now i have a fatty blister.

    gg, me.
    dotdotdot

    It's tempting, but let's not derail the thread again.

    TheFishF wrote:
    dude you going to answer my question or just say words that make no sence :?
    My Mario Kart DS Friend Code: 051-600-286-877
  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    Martman wrote:
    Moriarty wrote:
    so last night i had way too much 151 and apparently when i was blacked out i decided it'd be a good idea of i put a cigar out on my hand.

    so now i have a fatty blister.

    gg, me.
    dotdotdot

    It's tempting, but let's not derail the thread again.
    my favorite part of last night was when everyone but me was punching themselves in the face.

    "let's be like moriarty!"

    i've taught them well.

    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • WylderWylder Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Moriarty wrote:
    so last night i had way too much 151 and apparently when i was blacked out i decided it'd be a good idea of i put a cigar out on my hand.

    so now i have a fatty blister.

    gg, me.

    You hurting other people or yourself is no longer strange. You seem to do it all the time. Also, you dont seem the least embarrased by it. So perhaps you should start a new thread entitled "Me being an idiot"?.

    No sig for you!
  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    man, the moriarty being an idiot thread would totally be a 100-page rocket to the moon.

    i'm seriously so unhappy about this cigar burn, though.

    it's on the palm of my dick hand.

    a.k.a. my left hand.

    another strange thing that happened last night was when i got pulled over at two in the morning for not having a front license plate and having expired tags. and i had a wee bit of beer in me. i also had no proof of insurance. i just like, i totally have it somewhere.

    and i didn't get a ticket. unf unf unf.

    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • drhazarddrhazard Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Moriarty wrote:
    Martman wrote:
    Moriarty wrote:
    so last night i had way too much 151 and apparently when i was blacked out i decided it'd be a good idea of i put a cigar out on my hand.

    so now i have a fatty blister.

    gg, me.
    dotdotdot

    It's tempting, but let's not derail the thread again.
    my favorite part of last night was when everyone but me was punching themselves in the face.

    "let's be like moriarty!"

    i've taught them well.
    That... that's actually pretty funny.

    SCB.jpg
  • KrysanthemumKrysanthemum Registered User
    edited December 2005
    So much for giving up drinking, Moriarty. Good job there. I'm not even slightly surprised.

  • ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    So much for giving up drinking, Moriarty. Good job there. I'm not even slightly surprised.
    So much for giving up being a condescending bitch, Krysanthemum. Good job, there. I'm not even slightly surprised.

  • aquabataquabat Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Thanatos wrote:
    So much for giving up drinking, Moriarty. Good job there. I'm not even slightly surprised.
    So much for giving up being a condescending bitch, Krysanthemum. Good job, there. I'm not even slightly surprised.

    So much for giving up the sarcasm there, Thanatos. Good job, there. I'm not even slightly surprised.


    :P

  • GimGim Support purple causes, listen to Black Sabbath, count only blue cars Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    I'm surprised at all of you!

    F9RE9J8.png
  • nozdormunozdormu Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Thanatos wrote:
    So much for giving up drinking, Moriarty. Good job there. I'm not even slightly surprised.
    So much for giving up being a condescending bitch, Krysanthemum. Good job, there. I'm not even slightly surprised.

    Every week the guy comes in here and tells some story about how he acted like a stupid jackass while drunk. What do you expect?

  • MartmanMartman Registered User
    edited December 2005
    nozdormu wrote:
    Thanatos wrote:
    So much for giving up drinking, Moriarty. Good job there. I'm not even slightly surprised.
    So much for giving up being a condescending bitch, Krysanthemum. Good job, there. I'm not even slightly surprised.
    Every week the guy comes in here and tells some story about how he acted like a stupid jackass while drunk. What do you expect?
    For people to tell strange and embarrassing stories, and maybe PM Moriarty if they think he has a serious problem, and maybe not have the same pointless argument we just had a few pages ago.

    TheFishF wrote:
    dude you going to answer my question or just say words that make no sence :?
    My Mario Kart DS Friend Code: 051-600-286-877
  • ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    aquabat wrote:
    So much for giving up the sarcasm there, Thanatos. Good job, there. I'm not even slightly surprised.


    :P
    If I ever give up sarcasm, it will be moments before I die of a self-inflicted wound.

  • Aroused BullAroused Bull Registered User
    edited December 2005
    It was obviously sardonism anyway.

  • aquabataquabat Registered User
    edited December 2005
    It was obviously sardonism anyway.

    I dont think his quotes had anything to do sardines















    *cough*



    So one time on this forum someone said
    Someguy wrote:
    It was obviously sardonism anyway.

    and i replied with
    me wrote:
    I dont think his quotes had anything to do sardines

    and it was really fucking stupid

  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    last year one of my good friends gave me a shit load of tampons for christmas.

    it was pretty strange and slightly embarrassing.

    but i'm only mentioning this because i think you could use some, krys.

    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • ArtemadorousArtemadorous Registered User
    edited December 2005
    On my... 17th(?) birthday I was going out to dinner with this girl I was kinda seeing. When I got there I realized I was tricked into a surprise birthday dinner. FUCK! I'm not big on birthdays. So all my friends are their and I convinced them to not make the people sing and bring me cake or I would have yelled at them and walked out in all seriousness. But during it they gave me their presents... One guy gave me a poster of, I guess he was a male stripper, some ripped guy wearing boxer briefs and nothing else "signed with love" and another one of my friends gave me a box of edible side tied thongs...

    I think thats pretty embarassing.

    pissed_small_sig.jpg
  • aquabataquabat Registered User
    edited December 2005
    On my... 17th(?) birthday I was going out to dinner with this girl I was kinda seeing. When I got there I realized I was tricked into a surprise birthday dinner. FUCK! I'm not big on birthdays. So all my friends are their and I convinced them to not make the people sing and bring me cake or I would have yelled at them and walked out in all seriousness. But during it they gave me their presents... One guy gave me a poster of, I guess he was a male stripper, some ripped guy wearing boxer briefs and nothing else "signed with love" and another one of my friends gave me a box of edible side tied thongs...

    I think thats pretty embarassing.

    Damn. Lighten up dude

  • ArtemadorousArtemadorous Registered User
    edited December 2005
    ?? I'm not lightened up because I told an embarrasing story? I thought that was the point of the "Strange & Embarassing Moments Mk. II" thread.

    pissed_small_sig.jpg
  • aquabataquabat Registered User
    edited December 2005
    it was just only embarrassing cos you were so uptight about a stupid gay joke

This discussion has been closed.