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Strange & Embarrassing Moments Mk. II

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Posts

  • ProlegomenaProlegomena Frictionless Spinning The VoidRegistered User regular
    edited December 2005
    I hate all fun and enjoyment.

  • HacksawHacksaw J Duggan Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    edited December 2005
    craaawling in my skiiin.

  • Evil MultifariousEvil Multifarious Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Hacksaw wrote:
    I like big butts and I cannot lie! All you other brothers can't deny!

    ....wait, we're not just replacing his words with songs, are we? Shit.

    Inquisitor wrote: »
    I fucking hate you Canadians.
  • precisionkprecisionk Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Heir03 wrote:
    Moriarty wrote:
    so i'm up here in the city at my friend's house (same house where i beat up that guy before thanksgiving, for reference). last night this guy rob and i were standing around in the hallway while my friend and her sister got ready to go see chronicles of narnia.

    so my friend's sister is in the bathroom and the guy rob and i are standing around talking. there's a ten-second pause in our conversation and we're just sort of standing there fidgeting.

    all of a sudden, we hear the loudest shit come from the bathroom my friend's sister is in, followed quickly by a flush, as if she were trying to hide the flatulence with the flush but was a little off with the timing.

    rob and i were laughing for about ten minutes straight after that.

    i'd understand if you guys don't believe this story, though, since girls don't poo.


    Of course, Girls don't poop, and when they pee, it's pink and smells like flowers..................and then I got married......

    No single untruth in my life, not even Santa Claus, disappointed me more than the above. Once they are comfortable enough to break wind in the same room as you, you're screwed. All of a sudden, the floodgates of gross goings-on occurs and nothing left in life is quite as beautiful again. :|

    But in all seriousness, ewie. I tend to avoid standing around populated bathrooms for such reasons. If I feel some noise coming on, I tend to blast the nearest faucet until things settle down.

    Bolded for truth. My now fiance, when we were dating, accidently passed gas in the car on the way to a movie. She was very embarrassed and apologized constantly. Being the laid back guy I am, I said that it was fine and shows she is comfortable around me. Thus I unleashed that beast that is women's true self nature.

    Around men, they never shit or fart. However, secretly, they sit around by themselves shitting and farting all day. My fiance now does it as if she were my best friend drinking beer at a bar. Tis a sad day indeed.[/i]

  • nozdormunozdormu Registered User
    edited December 2005
    I hate all fun and enjoyment.

    No. He never said that. It would be pretty embarrassing for a lot of people.

  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    nozdormu wrote:
    I hate all fun and enjoyment.

    No. He never said that. It would be pretty embarrassing for a lot of people.
    a lot of uptight, humorless, homophobic people.

    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    i shit my pants this morning.

    totally thought it was a fart.

    guess not!

    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • Evil MultifariousEvil Multifarious Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Moriarty wrote:
    i shit my pants this morning.

    totally thought it was a fart.

    guess not!

    This thread has really lost something in the last dozen pages. I vote we kill it and start a new one.

    Inquisitor wrote: »
    I fucking hate you Canadians.
  • MartmanMartman Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Moriarty wrote:
    i shit my pants this morning.

    totally thought it was a fart.

    guess not!

    This thread has really lost something in the last dozen pages. I vote we kill it and start a new one.
    Along with a new Masturbation Competition.

    TheFishF wrote:
    dude you going to answer my question or just say words that make no sence :?
    My Mario Kart DS Friend Code: 051-600-286-877
  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    Martman wrote:
    Moriarty wrote:
    i shit my pants this morning.

    totally thought it was a fart.

    guess not!

    This thread has really lost something in the last dozen pages. I vote we kill it and start a new one.
    Along with a new Masturbation Competition.

    I want to see how long I can last in a masturbation contest.

  • ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Martman wrote:
    Moriarty wrote:
    i shit my pants this morning.

    totally thought it was a fart.

    guess not!
    This thread has really lost something in the last dozen pages. I vote we kill it and start a new one.
    Along with a new Masturbation Competition.
    No, the last one was the last one.

  • Low KeyLow Key Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Guys you are all forgetting the first rule of Masturbation Competition.

  • GimGim gossamer and quicksilver Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Low Key wrote:
    Guys you are all fogetting the first rule of Masturbation Competition.
    Don't?

    F9RE9J8.png
  • Aroused BullAroused Bull Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Would it really be good if it came back? The Masturbation Competition was a perfect jewel, without flaw or defect for all of its pages.

    I would kill for more masturbation restraint that were just as good, but doubt that such magic is still present in the minds of the people who still churn out gallon after gallon of the spunk.

  • Low KeyLow Key Registered User
    edited December 2005
    The Masturbation Competition is like your friends giving you a homoerotic poster for your birthday. At first it's pretty funny, and vaguely surprising and it satisfies that little spark of curiosity within you, which you never realised that deep down was shared by all the guys. After a little while, though, you feel kind of weird for being in the same vicinity as it, especially because suddenly everyone is disturbingly enthusiastic about the whole thing, begging you to bring the poster out again and getting way too excited about the rippling pecs and washboard abs. And eventually you wish it would just go away and nobody would ever talk about it again and you sit alone at night in your room, with the poster locked in a drawer, wondering to yourself if your palms are getting hairy.

  • WylderWylder Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Moriarty wrote:
    i shit my pants this morning.

    totally thought it was a fart.

    guess not!

    You are killing one of my favorite threads.

    I REALLY wasn't joking when I said you should make a thread titled "Moriarty being an idiot". It would make a big difference to what was once a good thread.

    No sig for you!
  • aquabataquabat Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Maybe in the Double D of yesterday, but theres no way the Masturbation Competition has a place here these days.

  • DocDoc Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2005
    Yeah, it's not coming back. Sorry guys. It was really funny to see how many people dropped out every time Olympic Women's Beach Volleyball came on, though.

  • Evil MultifariousEvil Multifarious Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Doc wrote:
    Yeah, it's not coming back. Sorry guys. It was really funny to see how many people dropped out every time Olympic Women's Beach Volleyball came on, though.

    <img class=" title=":lol:" class="bbcode_smiley" />

    Inquisitor wrote: »
    I fucking hate you Canadians.
  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    Wylder wrote:
    Moriarty wrote:
    i shit my pants this morning.

    totally thought it was a fart.

    guess not!

    You are killing one of my favorite threads.

    I REALLY wasn't joking when I said you should make a thread titled "Moriarty being an idiot". It would make a big difference to what was once a good thread.
    considering it was the first time that such an event has occurred since i was in diapers, it was pretty strange and slightly embarrassing (as it was done with no one around in the privacy of my own home).

    but i love you too, wylder.

    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • YosemiteSamYosemiteSam Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Low Key wrote:
    The Masturbation Competition is like your friends giving you a homoerotic poster for your birthday. At first it's pretty funny, and vaguely surprising and it satisfies that little spark of curiosity within you, which you never realised that deep down was shared by all the guys. After a little while, though, you feel kind of weird for being in the same vicinity as it, especially because suddenly everyone is disturbingly enthusiastic about the whole thing, begging you to bring the poster out again and getting way too excited about the rippling pecs and washboard abs. And eventually you wish it would just go away and nobody would ever talk about it again and you sit alone at night in your room, with the poster locked in a drawer, wondering to yourself if your palms are getting hairy.
    That's the best analogy I've heard in quite a while.

    We are all very lucky to live in a world where there is this much music.
  • KrysanthemumKrysanthemum Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Hey, when did I ever say I was going to give up being a bitch? I would never have said anything so stupid.

    And Moriarty...

    Fuck you very much. It's because of people like you that sterilization was created. Look into it, for the sake of humanity.

  • MartmanMartman Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Hey, when did I ever say I was going to give up being a bitch? I would never have said anything so stupid.

    And Moriarty...

    Fuck you very much. It's because of people like you that sterilization was created. Look into it, for the sake of humanity.
    Go away. Stop. Just stop.

    TheFishF wrote:
    dude you going to answer my question or just say words that make no sence :?
    My Mario Kart DS Friend Code: 051-600-286-877
  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    Hey, when did I ever say I was going to give up being a bitch? I would never have said anything so stupid.

    And Moriarty...

    Fuck you very much. It's because of people like you that sterilization was created. Look into it, for the sake of humanity.
    menstruate'd

    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • edited December 2005
    period blood everywhere

  • DocDoc Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2005
    This is not directed at any one person:

    Stop fucking up this thread.

  • zombiesocialitezombiesocialite Registered User
    edited December 2005
    The other night, I did a all nighter, followed by a all dayer. I stayed up for a good 24 hours, then fell asleep for 2 or 3 hours, then stayed up the rest of the night doing my radioshow, and other Saturday evening things.

    Later that night I made out with my girlfriend, we got naked and I went down. It was pretty hot and I was going at it with my all.

    Out of nowhere, my neck gets a crink, and I almost fall asleep on her. I'm super tired and I'm completely out of stamina.

    I had to go eat a sandwich and some crackers before I could even think straight.

    Mostly Malcontent with Discontent
  • ArtemadorousArtemadorous Registered User
    edited December 2005
    aquabat wrote:
    it was just only embarrassing cos you were so uptight about a stupid gay joke

    No it was embarrassing being in a very public place with gay paraphernalia. I didn’t get mad, I wasn’t upset. It was a harmless story. Damn people on here are quick to decide what things mean on their own, make assumptions and judge.

    pissed_small_sig.jpg
  • ProlegomenaProlegomena Frictionless Spinning The VoidRegistered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Damn people on here are quick to decide what things mean on their own

    Damn our functioning brains!

  • ArtemadorousArtemadorous Registered User
    edited December 2005
    No... I meant some people read what they want regardless of the words on the page. They then twist the meaning for it to be what they want.

    So you don't take it literal again, its similar to selective hearing.

    pissed_small_sig.jpg
  • AnonymoAnonymo Registered User
    edited December 2005
    You know what's more embarassing than dropping out of the masturbation competition?
    Winning.
    And I'll never go that long again.


    Another story?
    So I was wrestling my girlfriend in the lounge at my college, and she insults me with some lame thing, then taunts me to reply back. I say that I'll skull fuck her so hard if she doesn't stop. She liked that, asked what it meant. I told her about scooping out her eye, fucking the socket. She still liked it, and a couple days later, came into the lounge, several other people were in there, and very cheerfully said, "I'll let you skull fuck me! I really think you'll like it!"
    She's a strange one.

  • MartmanMartman Registered User
    edited December 2005
    I'm not going to :winky:... it's too obvious.

    ...



    ...






    :winky:

    TheFishF wrote:
    dude you going to answer my question or just say words that make no sence :?
    My Mario Kart DS Friend Code: 051-600-286-877
  • QuelrethQuelreth Registered User
    edited December 2005
    The other night, I did a all nighter, followed by a all dayer. I stayed up for a good 24 hours, then fell asleep for 2 or 3 hours, then stayed up the rest of the night doing my radioshow, and other Saturday evening things.

    Later that night I made out with my girlfriend, we got naked and I went down. It was pretty hot and I was going at it with my all.

    Out of nowhere, my neck gets a crink, and I almost fall asleep on her. I'm super tired and I'm completely out of stamina.

    I had to go eat a sandwich and some crackers before I could even think straight.

    So am I the only one who's fallen asleep right after the show's over? We're not talking once or twice here, either, I think I'm in the double digits.

    What's funnier is the girlfriends usually let me sleep for a while...

  • NintoNinto Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Quelreth wrote:
    The other night, I did a all nighter, followed by a all dayer. I stayed up for a good 24 hours, then fell asleep for 2 or 3 hours, then stayed up the rest of the night doing my radioshow, and other Saturday evening things.

    Later that night I made out with my girlfriend, we got naked and I went down. It was pretty hot and I was going at it with my all.

    Out of nowhere, my neck gets a crink, and I almost fall asleep on her. I'm super tired and I'm completely out of stamina.

    I had to go eat a sandwich and some crackers before I could even think straight.

    So am I the only one who's fallen asleep right after the show's over? We're not talking once or twice here, either, I think I'm in the double digits.

    What's funnier is the girlfriends usually let me sleep for a while...

    It's fairly common, in fact I think it's a big complaint the ladies have about men in general.

  • ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Ninto wrote:
    Quelreth wrote:
    The other night, I did a all nighter, followed by a all dayer. I stayed up for a good 24 hours, then fell asleep for 2 or 3 hours, then stayed up the rest of the night doing my radioshow, and other Saturday evening things.

    Later that night I made out with my girlfriend, we got naked and I went down. It was pretty hot and I was going at it with my all.

    Out of nowhere, my neck gets a crink, and I almost fall asleep on her. I'm super tired and I'm completely out of stamina.

    I had to go eat a sandwich and some crackers before I could even think straight.
    So am I the only one who's fallen asleep right after the show's over? We're not talking once or twice here, either, I think I'm in the double digits.

    What's funnier is the girlfriends usually let me sleep for a while...
    It's fairly common, in fact I think it's a big complaint the ladies have about men in general.
    Well, I mean, once you're done, what else is there to do? :P

  • NintoNinto Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Thanatos wrote:
    Ninto wrote:
    Quelreth wrote:
    The other night, I did a all nighter, followed by a all dayer. I stayed up for a good 24 hours, then fell asleep for 2 or 3 hours, then stayed up the rest of the night doing my radioshow, and other Saturday evening things.

    Later that night I made out with my girlfriend, we got naked and I went down. It was pretty hot and I was going at it with my all.

    Out of nowhere, my neck gets a crink, and I almost fall asleep on her. I'm super tired and I'm completely out of stamina.

    I had to go eat a sandwich and some crackers before I could even think straight.
    So am I the only one who's fallen asleep right after the show's over? We're not talking once or twice here, either, I think I'm in the double digits.

    What's funnier is the girlfriends usually let me sleep for a while...
    It's fairly common, in fact I think it's a big complaint the ladies have about men in general.
    Well, I mean, once you're done, what else is there to do? :P

    You could always cuddle, I hear that's popular.

  • Bionic MonkeyBionic Monkey Registered User, ClubPA
    edited December 2005
    Snuggle. Obviously.

    sig_megas_armed.jpg
  • QuelrethQuelreth Registered User
    edited December 2005
    Thanatos wrote:
    Ninto wrote:
    Quelreth wrote:
    The other night, I did a all nighter, followed by a all dayer. I stayed up for a good 24 hours, then fell asleep for 2 or 3 hours, then stayed up the rest of the night doing my radioshow, and other Saturday evening things.

    Later that night I made out with my girlfriend, we got naked and I went down. It was pretty hot and I was going at it with my all.

    Out of nowhere, my neck gets a crink, and I almost fall asleep on her. I'm super tired and I'm completely out of stamina.

    I had to go eat a sandwich and some crackers before I could even think straight.
    So am I the only one who's fallen asleep right after the show's over? We're not talking once or twice here, either, I think I'm in the double digits.

    What's funnier is the girlfriends usually let me sleep for a while...
    It's fairly common, in fact I think it's a big complaint the ladies have about men in general.
    Well, I mean, once you're done, what else is there to do? :P

    Pull out, for one thing... yeah, I meant RIGHT AFTER the show was over.

  • NintoNinto Registered User regular
    edited December 2005
    Quelreth wrote:
    Thanatos wrote:
    Ninto wrote:
    Quelreth wrote:
    The other night, I did a all nighter, followed by a all dayer. I stayed up for a good 24 hours, then fell asleep for 2 or 3 hours, then stayed up the rest of the night doing my radioshow, and other Saturday evening things.

    Later that night I made out with my girlfriend, we got naked and I went down. It was pretty hot and I was going at it with my all.

    Out of nowhere, my neck gets a crink, and I almost fall asleep on her. I'm super tired and I'm completely out of stamina.

    I had to go eat a sandwich and some crackers before I could even think straight.
    So am I the only one who's fallen asleep right after the show's over? We're not talking once or twice here, either, I think I'm in the double digits.

    What's funnier is the girlfriends usually let me sleep for a while...
    It's fairly common, in fact I think it's a big complaint the ladies have about men in general.
    Well, I mean, once you're done, what else is there to do? :P

    Pull out, for one thing... yeah, I meant RIGHT AFTER the show was over.

    Have you checked with your doctor? I hear narcilepsy can be dangerous in some situations.

  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2005
    I was getting Jamba Juice for my community service crew and they were playing "Walkin on Sunshine," so like the good Futurama fan I am, I started singing very loudly.


    I got some weird looks.

This discussion has been closed.