It's worth noting that both of the above "success" stories started while they were in high school together, rather than one of them being out and one of them being in.
It's worth noting that both of the above "success" stories started while they were in high school together, rather than one of them being out and one of them being in.
Hey hey hey. I am not an in-quotes success! I am an out-of-quotes success!
Seriously, I'm very happy with my realtionship, and have been for the entire time I've been with my GF. It is important to note that yeah, starting out with both of you in HS is much easier. We got to know each other in a good year during HS when we were forced to not see each other every single day, but could see each other often. There are also just plain downsides: Going to college sucks. Not just because you miss her, but because you're out there and she isn't. She gets left behind to mire in the crap that is HS, and you start your new exciting what-have-you experience in college. It makes for a bit of tension, to say the least. We dealt with it by talking often, sending e-mails, meeting up during the year on weekends sometimes, and generally being level-headed and accepting of the fact that while it sucked to not have kisses, we did love to talk to each other and that could suffice for a while. Drama only occurs when one or the other partner cannot accept this aspect of the relationship gracefully, it's not a given.
I think people are overstating the maturity barrier a bit in here. I'm not trying to encourage cradle-robbing... but my friends range in age from about 34 to 14, and maturity levels tend to range widely without much deference to age. You can decide for yourself if this girl is someone you can actually form a relationship with even if that relationship is primarily verbal intercourse.
Additionally, College is super awesome, but it's not some garden of earthly delights where all the women are sexier and smarter and worth more than your lowly high schooler of a girlfriend. They're people. Who are probably 1 to 6 years older than your girlfriend. The idea of giving up a relationship with someone you like in order to bet on the massive amount of ladies you will totally bone once you start being a college stud is kind of silly.
The difference between high school and college dating is that many people settle for who they can get in HS, and talk to people they're interested in in college because the playing field is so much wider. The only real question here is whether you're genuinely intrigued, or just passing time. Personally, none of my female friends or classmates really capture my attention the way my GF did and does.
If out of the entire world, she really is the person you'd like to be around most, go for it.
P.S. In the interest of full disclosue: The other 2 relationships I know of that involved 1 college and one high school student did not really work out well at all. But the people involved are in each case both nutjobs. Lovable nutjobs, but still. My GF and I started dating in May of my junior and her freshman year, and 3 years later she's going to college, and we're having a pretty nice time of it. My 2 friends started dating their respective lady friends at almost the exact same time, and 3 years later one of them was basically out of contact with his GF for this entire year, and they finally broke up, and one is annoying the crap out of his GF, and they may break up.
Seriously, I'm very happy with my realtionship, and have been for the entire time I've been with my GF. It is important to note that yeah, starting out with both of you in HS is much easier. We got to know each other in a good year during HS when we were forced to not see each other every single day, but could see each other often. There are also just plain downsides: Going to college sucks. Not just because you miss her, but because you're out there and she isn't. She gets left behind to mire in the crap that is HS, and you start your new exciting what-have-you experience in college. It makes for a bit of tension, to say the least. We dealt with it by talking often, sending e-mails, meeting up during the year on weekends sometimes, and generally being level-headed and accepting of the fact that while it sucked to not have kisses, we did love to talk to each other and that could suffice for a while. Drama only occurs when one or the other partner cannot accept this aspect of the relationship gracefully, it's not a given.
You also were with her for over a year before going to college. Right before you leave seems like a really, really stupid time to get into a relationship, because it will inevitably become long-distance at the end of the summer, and that's just going to suck.
It's one thing to maintain a long-distance relationship because you've been going out for awhile, it's another thing to try to start a relationship long-distance.
Whether or not you're a bad person may be less of an issue compared to what everyone else thinks. What are your parents going to think if you bring home a 15 year old girl? Are you going to lie to them, or are they going to end up giving you 'why can't you be with someone your own age' speeches?
The consenting age is 16 in Britain and I'm of the opinion that whilst hte age is probably legit, there's a few elements to it that I disagree with, so I've always thought that if they appear old enough and mature enough to ACTUALLY make this choice for themselves and realise the connotations, then as long as you're okay with it yourself and you don't end up in jail, then why not? However, there are of course plenty of reasons why not and one of this board's rules is we cannot advocate you sleeping with a minor or breaking the law in any way.
You have the maximum of a year before she's 16. Can you wait that long/is your state/country's legal age higher?
DynamiteKid on
www.rockmidgets.com
0
RankenphilePassersby were amazedby the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderatormod
edited June 2007
look at the risks involved here, chief.
Sure, pretty girl, fun fun times, yadda yadda yadda.
But do you really feel like having to go around to your neighbors every time you move, saying, "Hi there! I'm a convicted child molester!"
And good luck ever getting a job where you have to put "Yes. Child Molestation." on the line that says "Have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on the application.
I'm not trying to be mean about this, but dude, don't even fucking think about it. You're in high school, about to graduate and enter college, and as crude as this might sound you are entering the pussy prime of your life. By all means, be friends with this girl. But find out if she has an older sister.
It's one thing to maintain a long-distance relationship because you've been going out for awhile, it's another thing to try to start a relationship long-distance.
And this is regardless of age differences. Now tack on age differences and the very different stages of life between the two parties and oh look it's a huge fucking mess.
Pheezer on
IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
0
AbsoluteZeroThe new film by Quentin KoopantinoRegistered Userregular
It's worth noting that both of the above "success" stories started while they were in high school together, rather than one of them being out and one of them being in.
It's worth noting that both of the above "success" stories started while they were in high school together, rather than one of them being out and one of them being in.
It's worth noting that both of the above "success" stories started while they were in high school together, rather than one of them being out and one of them being in.
It isn't as though it stayed that way for long.
2 years is pretty long.
8 times as long as 3 months, in fact.
2 years of dating steadily during high school is an eternity. The vast majority of high school relationships don't last a single school year. Lasting 2 years during high school means a hell of a lot more than three months of dating does.
Pheezer on
IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
0
AbsoluteZeroThe new film by Quentin KoopantinoRegistered Userregular
It's worth noting that both of the above "success" stories started while they were in high school together, rather than one of them being out and one of them being in.
It isn't as though it stayed that way for long.
2 years is pretty long.
8 times as long as 3 months, in fact.
2 years of dating steadily during high school is an eternity. The vast majority of high school relationships don't last a single school year. Lasting 2 years during high school means a hell of a lot more than three months of dating does.
I guess I don't understand what difference it makes if you go to high school together with a person you date.
Sure, maybe you see eachother in school, but probably not that much. It's unlikely you'd have classes together, or belong to the same "clique."
It's almost like you're determined to miss the point. The point is that dating someone who is in high school when you've graduated is retarded and begging for all kinds of nonsense and potentially legal trouble. Dating someone for two years while you're both in high school, graduating one year early and continuing on is very different than dating a high school kid for 3 months when you should be looking at your college options.
Pheezer on
IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
0
AbsoluteZeroThe new film by Quentin KoopantinoRegistered Userregular
edited June 2007
If she's old enough to defeat the statutory limit, where exactly is the legal trouble?
You are going to deal with all kinds of nonsense dating someone that young when you are an "older boy" regardless of if you are in high school with the person or not. The matter of what high school you are attending, or if you are attending high school, makes nearly no difference at all. The only difference is the people you are surrounded by.
It is not retarded to date someone you are interested in (and who is interested in you) regardless of what age of women you are primarily surrounded by so long as you are not breaking the law. If you really like someone, you will deal with the bullshit that comes your way.
If she's old enough to defeat the statutory limit, where exactly is the legal trouble?
You are going to deal with all kinds of nonsense dating someone that young when you are an "older boy" regardless of if you are in high school with the person or not. The matter of what high school you are attending, or if you are attending high school, makes nearly no difference at all. The only difference is the people you are surrounded by.
It is not retarded to date someone you are interested in (and who is interested in you) regardless of what age of women you are primarily surrounded by so long as you are not breaking the law. If you really like someone, you will deal with the bullshit that comes your way.
We established that she isn't legal, and if he's going off to college, he's not really "dating" her, so much as "getting to know her over IM."
I think it'd be slightly different if you were just becoming a senior, but getting into a relationship right before you leave for college is bad news regardless of her age.
If she's old enough to defeat the statutory limit, where exactly is the legal trouble?
You are going to deal with all kinds of nonsense dating someone that young when you are an "older boy" regardless of if you are in high school with the person or not. The matter of what high school you are attending, or if you are attending high school, makes nearly no difference at all. The only difference is the people you are surrounded by.
It is not retarded to date someone you are interested in (and who is interested in you) regardless of what age of women you are primarily surrounded by so long as you are not breaking the law. If you really like someone, you will deal with the bullshit that comes your way.
We established that she isn't legal, and if he's going off to college, he's not really "dating" her, so much as "getting to know her over IM."
I know all that, I was merely responding to Pheezer.
Ginz, are you seriously going to let a little red tape and some forum prudes get between you and true love?
The answer is yes. You thought she was a junior; therefore, you fell for her under false pretenses. The girl you fancied never existed. She was an illusion, as fake as your alleged feelings for her. Forget her. Find yourself a consenting older gal. Did you know women hit their sexual peak at forty?
Well, regardless of what the law says, it really isn't even the issue here.
Chances are, you're going to go to College, and like others said, there will be many fish in the sea. Additionally, you just spent 4 years in High School, do you really want a girlfriend who will relay all the stupid drama and bullshit that goes on during that time period when it's no longer relevant to you?
A solution came up last week that has made this whole situation fixed.
We got togeather and had a bunch of felony sex. Okay... Not really.
I got drunk with a friend of mine whos in college, one thing lead to another, and lets just say I have a summer 'buddy' now and its working wonderfully, I think she wants a relationship but thats another topic. I've found myself not even thinking about the little girl situation.
Guess it just worked out, thanks for all the advice!
Posts
Seriously, I'm very happy with my realtionship, and have been for the entire time I've been with my GF. It is important to note that yeah, starting out with both of you in HS is much easier. We got to know each other in a good year during HS when we were forced to not see each other every single day, but could see each other often. There are also just plain downsides: Going to college sucks. Not just because you miss her, but because you're out there and she isn't. She gets left behind to mire in the crap that is HS, and you start your new exciting what-have-you experience in college. It makes for a bit of tension, to say the least. We dealt with it by talking often, sending e-mails, meeting up during the year on weekends sometimes, and generally being level-headed and accepting of the fact that while it sucked to not have kisses, we did love to talk to each other and that could suffice for a while. Drama only occurs when one or the other partner cannot accept this aspect of the relationship gracefully, it's not a given.
I think people are overstating the maturity barrier a bit in here. I'm not trying to encourage cradle-robbing... but my friends range in age from about 34 to 14, and maturity levels tend to range widely without much deference to age. You can decide for yourself if this girl is someone you can actually form a relationship with even if that relationship is primarily verbal intercourse.
Additionally, College is super awesome, but it's not some garden of earthly delights where all the women are sexier and smarter and worth more than your lowly high schooler of a girlfriend. They're people. Who are probably 1 to 6 years older than your girlfriend. The idea of giving up a relationship with someone you like in order to bet on the massive amount of ladies you will totally bone once you start being a college stud is kind of silly.
The difference between high school and college dating is that many people settle for who they can get in HS, and talk to people they're interested in in college because the playing field is so much wider. The only real question here is whether you're genuinely intrigued, or just passing time. Personally, none of my female friends or classmates really capture my attention the way my GF did and does.
If out of the entire world, she really is the person you'd like to be around most, go for it.
P.S. In the interest of full disclosue: The other 2 relationships I know of that involved 1 college and one high school student did not really work out well at all. But the people involved are in each case both nutjobs. Lovable nutjobs, but still. My GF and I started dating in May of my junior and her freshman year, and 3 years later she's going to college, and we're having a pretty nice time of it. My 2 friends started dating their respective lady friends at almost the exact same time, and 3 years later one of them was basically out of contact with his GF for this entire year, and they finally broke up, and one is annoying the crap out of his GF, and they may break up.
It's one thing to maintain a long-distance relationship because you've been going out for awhile, it's another thing to try to start a relationship long-distance.
The consenting age is 16 in Britain and I'm of the opinion that whilst hte age is probably legit, there's a few elements to it that I disagree with, so I've always thought that if they appear old enough and mature enough to ACTUALLY make this choice for themselves and realise the connotations, then as long as you're okay with it yourself and you don't end up in jail, then why not? However, there are of course plenty of reasons why not and one of this board's rules is we cannot advocate you sleeping with a minor or breaking the law in any way.
You have the maximum of a year before she's 16. Can you wait that long/is your state/country's legal age higher?
www.rockmidgets.com
Sure, pretty girl, fun fun times, yadda yadda yadda.
But do you really feel like having to go around to your neighbors every time you move, saying, "Hi there! I'm a convicted child molester!"
And good luck ever getting a job where you have to put "Yes. Child Molestation." on the line that says "Have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on the application.
I'm not trying to be mean about this, but dude, don't even fucking think about it. You're in high school, about to graduate and enter college, and as crude as this might sound you are entering the pussy prime of your life. By all means, be friends with this girl. But find out if she has an older sister.
And this is regardless of age differences. Now tack on age differences and the very different stages of life between the two parties and oh look it's a huge fucking mess.
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
It isn't as though it stayed that way for long.
8 times as long as 3 months, in fact.
2 years of dating steadily during high school is an eternity. The vast majority of high school relationships don't last a single school year. Lasting 2 years during high school means a hell of a lot more than three months of dating does.
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
I guess I don't understand what difference it makes if you go to high school together with a person you date.
Sure, maybe you see eachother in school, but probably not that much. It's unlikely you'd have classes together, or belong to the same "clique."
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
You are going to deal with all kinds of nonsense dating someone that young when you are an "older boy" regardless of if you are in high school with the person or not. The matter of what high school you are attending, or if you are attending high school, makes nearly no difference at all. The only difference is the people you are surrounded by.
It is not retarded to date someone you are interested in (and who is interested in you) regardless of what age of women you are primarily surrounded by so long as you are not breaking the law. If you really like someone, you will deal with the bullshit that comes your way.
But hey, at least you're not this guy!
http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Story?id=3305652&page=1
I know all that, I was merely responding to Pheezer.
Chances are, you're going to go to College, and like others said, there will be many fish in the sea. Additionally, you just spent 4 years in High School, do you really want a girlfriend who will relay all the stupid drama and bullshit that goes on during that time period when it's no longer relevant to you?
A solution came up last week that has made this whole situation fixed.
We got togeather and had a bunch of felony sex. Okay... Not really.
I got drunk with a friend of mine whos in college, one thing lead to another, and lets just say I have a summer 'buddy' now and its working wonderfully, I think she wants a relationship but thats another topic. I've found myself not even thinking about the little girl situation.
Guess it just worked out, thanks for all the advice!