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Fucking with your coworkers

135678

Posts

  • CriticalCritical Registered User
    edited September 2007
    My story starts out with my co-workers fucking with me. This one guy at work (I used to work at a gas station/fast food restaurant) would put me on bathroom check duty and before he would send me in, he would sneak into the bathroom, shit in it, and then place one of the old footlong hot dogs from the fast food side and put it in there to insure I would have to dig in there and remove the hot dog so the toilet would not clog.

    This went on once before and that time he told me "it had to have been a customer" after he took a sip from his 32oz cup covered with a straw lid. (See where I am going with this?)

    So on my last day of work (before moving up to college) he thought he would play the same prank again for "old time's sake" and thus shit in the bathroom and placed a hot dog in it. So as a pulled the cleaning cart up to the bathroom I also grabbed an empty cup. Once in there I immediately threw on the gloves, ripped the dog in half, threw half in the cup and the other half in the trash, and cleaned up.

    When I came out of the bathroom, my co-worker was in the back doing dishes, probably laughing his ass off. So I took this opportunity to dump the contents of my cup into his ( fecal matter, dog, and all.) and popped the lid back on.

    I then went to the timeclock and punched out an hour early and left.

    I have yet to hear from the bastard.

    Wow.

    Woooooooooow.

    edesig.jpg
  • misbehavinmisbehavin Registered User
    edited September 2007
    Skull Man wrote: »
    I got fired from my chef job for shoving a guy onto a tray of food when he grabbed my ass and said "when do you get off"

    it was like the third time he did it

    Are you a dude, as well? Because, if so, you should have just waited until after work to beat the hell out of him.

    If you are not a dude, then I applaud you.

    Spoiler:
  • SaphSaph Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I once told a blind guy that it was safe to cross the road, but it totally wasn't

  • WeaverWeaver Storm coming FinallyRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I just booted Callius off of his machine.

    7BLr6AJ.jpg
  • edited September 2007
    misbehavin wrote: »
    Skull Man wrote: »
    I got fired from my chef job for shoving a guy onto a tray of food when he grabbed my ass and said "when do you get off"

    it was like the third time he did it

    Are you a dude, as well? Because, if so, you should have just waited until after work to beat the hell out of him.

    If you are not a dude, then I applaud you.

    Yeah, with a name like Skull Man, I could see why you would be apprehensive about assuming he is male.

  • BalefuegoBalefuego Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Skull Man is a very gender ambiguous handle I agree

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    My story starts out with my co-workers fucking with me. This one guy at work (I used to work at a gas station/fast food restaurant) would put me on bathroom check duty and before he would send me in, he would sneak into the bathroom, shit in it, and then place one of the old footlong hot dogs from the fast food side and put it in there to insure I would have to dig in there and remove the hot dog so the toilet would not clog.

    This went on once before and that time he told me "it had to have been a customer" after he took a sip from his 32oz cup covered with a straw lid. (See where I am going with this?)

    So on my last day of work (before moving up to college) he thought he would play the same prank again for "old time's sake" and thus shit in the bathroom and placed a hot dog in it. So as a pulled the cleaning cart up to the bathroom I also grabbed an empty cup. Once in there I immediately threw on the gloves, ripped the dog in half, threw half in the cup and the other half in the trash, and cleaned up.

    When I came out of the bathroom, my co-worker was in the back doing dishes, probably laughing his ass off. So I took this opportunity to dump the contents of my cup into his ( fecal matter, dog, and all.) and popped the lid back on.

    I then went to the timeclock and punched out an hour early and left.

    I have yet to hear from the bastard.

    Drinkin' Mountain Poo

    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
  • AslanAslan Registered User
    edited September 2007
    Saph wrote: »
    I've done some stuff to coworkers. Yea, it was bad and I did it.
    I wouldn't call rape, murder and torture pranks...

    Funny though.

    Captain_Renault.gif I'm shocked...shocked, to find faggotry in this thread.
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Saph wrote: »
    I once told a blind guy that it was safe to cross the road, but it totally wasn't

    And you were his seeing eye dog or something?

  • SaphSaph Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Aslan wrote: »
    Saph wrote: »
    I've done some stuff to coworkers. Yea, it was bad and I did it.
    I wouldn't call rape, murder and torture pranks...

    Funny though.
    Oh, absolutely.

  • Skull ManSkull Man Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    misbehavin wrote: »
    Skull Man wrote: »
    I got fired from my chef job for shoving a guy onto a tray of food when he grabbed my ass and said "when do you get off"

    it was like the third time he did it

    Are you a dude, as well? Because, if so, you should have just waited until after work to beat the hell out of him.

    If you are not a dude, then I applaud you.

    no I am a fellow

    it was an attempt to bitch me down, which was ludicrous because I'm six three and silly for fightin'

    he also jabbed a knife at me a couple times, so, for poetic justice, I slashed his tires about a week after I was fired

  • SaphSaph Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Preacher wrote: »
    Saph wrote: »
    I once told a blind guy that it was safe to cross the road, but it totally wasn't

    And you were his seeing eye dog or something?
    That was another part of the prank

  • WeaverWeaver Storm coming FinallyRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Callius just ran in to my office all "How did you do it?!"

    7BLr6AJ.jpg
  • Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    skull man you are a vindictive fellow

    xmassig2.gif
  • misbehavinmisbehavin Registered User
    edited September 2007
    The Prime wrote: »
    misbehavin wrote: »
    Skull Man wrote: »
    I got fired from my chef job for shoving a guy onto a tray of food when he grabbed my ass and said "when do you get off"

    it was like the third time he did it

    Are you a dude, as well? Because, if so, you should have just waited until after work to beat the hell out of him.

    If you are not a dude, then I applaud you.

    Yeah, with a name like Skull Man, I could see why you would be apprehensive about assuming he is male.

    Fuck, man, I can never tell around here. Example: TFS has been called just about every gender-identifying term known to man and he never complains, so I have no idea what he is.

    Spoiler:
  • mullymully Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    oh! i DID do something once.

    an ex-friend of mine (long story, but it wasn't because of this instance) is scared to death of two things.

    1) crows
    2) juon (or The Grudge or whatever the english is)

    the crows bit was easy. printed out a bunch of life sized pictures of crows, cut them out, taped them all around her cubicle.

    the juan part. i printed out 2 photos of the kid. one, i placed on her computer screen. the other, i cut the eyes out of and placed the head over top of her phone. the eyes were placed right over where the phone flashes red when there's a message.

    but there was no messaging flashing. so.

    i went to a friend in the office who imitates the weird grinding noise that the kid in the movie makes. he left her a message of JUST that. and now the eyes were flashing red.

    i don't think she felt quite right after that.

  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Certified BrimperRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I have a friend who is very very blind without her glasses and we often go to amusement parks, so she has me hold onto them while when we ride the coasters and I'll walk her along till we get on the ride.

    I think I'll find a similarly built dude next time and pass her off to him and see what happens.

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  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I've screensavers to the "Flagrant System Error" from Homestar Runner.

    Also when I worked at a smaller company (One site, just big enough to have an Windows Active Directory) one of our callcenter girls was bored on a cold winters day, and our internet was out, so she made a rediculously bad MSPaint of our office from the perspective of her desk. She then saved said file to one of the network drives.

    I found said file, added a comment to it and signed it so everyone would know who made it, then I made a slight alteration to the toplevel Group Policy that enforces backgrounds...

    Raneados wrote: »
    so what SPECIFICALLY is the problem with my hole?
  • BijlBijl Registered User
    edited September 2007
    misbehavin wrote: »
    The Prime wrote: »
    misbehavin wrote: »
    Skull Man wrote: »
    I got fired from my chef job for shoving a guy onto a tray of food when he grabbed my ass and said "when do you get off"

    it was like the third time he did it

    Are you a dude, as well? Because, if so, you should have just waited until after work to beat the hell out of him.

    If you are not a dude, then I applaud you.

    Yeah, with a name like Skull Man, I could see why you would be apprehensive about assuming he is male.

    Fuck, man, I can never tell around here. Example: TFS has been called just about every gender-identifying term known to man and he never complains, so I have no idea what he is.
    hahaha

  • CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    I have a friend who is very very blind without her glasses and we often go to amusement parks, so she has me hold onto them while when we ride the coasters and I'll walk her along till we get on the ride.

    velma3.gif

    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
  • misbehavinmisbehavin Registered User
    edited September 2007
    Closest I ever came to messing with a co-worker was, at this job in Cambridge, there was this guy who was a ridiculous Red Sox fan, with his cube COVERED in Sox paraphernalia. So, one day, I swapped all his posters for pictures of Jeter and Rivera and put his posters in the service closet.

    He was... displeased. But he never knew it was me, because I'm a Sox fan too! hehe

    Spoiler:
  • TonkkaTonkka Some one in the club tonight Has stolen my ideas.Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Great... now I have to start nabbing IPs and testing security...

    Too many good ideas here.

    Not that I would ever do anything harmful.

    tonkkatrikesig.jpg
    Gamertag: T0NKKA - Steam: evilumpire Twitter Art blog/Portfolio! HEY SATAN
  • Skull ManSkull Man Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    skull man you are a vindictive fellow

    it comes from three years of middle school and two of high school of being fucked with and having no means of recourse

    I made a solemn vow to never take shit from anyone anywhere

  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    misbehavin wrote: »
    The Prime wrote: »
    misbehavin wrote: »
    Skull Man wrote: »
    I got fired from my chef job for shoving a guy onto a tray of food when he grabbed my ass and said "when do you get off"

    it was like the third time he did it

    Are you a dude, as well? Because, if so, you should have just waited until after work to beat the hell out of him.

    If you are not a dude, then I applaud you.

    Yeah, with a name like Skull Man, I could see why you would be apprehensive about assuming he is male.

    Fuck, man, I can never tell around here. Example: TFS has been called just about every gender-identifying term known to man and he never complains, so I have no idea what he is.

    neither does she!


    heyoooo

    easysig2.jpg
  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Certified BrimperRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    I have a friend who is very very blind without her glasses and we often go to amusement parks, so she has me hold onto them while when we ride the coasters and I'll walk her along till we get on the ride.

    jinkies!


    Yeah, more or less.

    sites: personal | tumblr | abracadaniel dot com | coolguy.me
    services I recommend: tonx coffee *highly recommended* | everlane
    Secret Satan Wishlists: Regular List Coffee Stuff
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  • CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    I have a friend who is very very blind without her glasses and we often go to amusement parks, so she has me hold onto them while when we ride the coasters and I'll walk her along till we get on the ride.

    jinkies!


    Yeah, more or less.

    I was pissed because I couldnt find a shot of her in the old run down amusement park!!!

    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Certified BrimperRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Also, after my housemate left for a long weekend, I had a friend of mine (Sunday school teacher, no less) make about 200 copies of the photo of the Dong Man (you know the picture) at his church and distributed them throughout the house, hiding them among his clothes, under toilet lids, in boxes of cereal.

    We moved out of that house about a year ago, and we just found one of the copies taped to the inside of one of his shirts about a month ago.

    sites: personal | tumblr | abracadaniel dot com | coolguy.me
    services I recommend: tonx coffee *highly recommended* | everlane
    Secret Satan Wishlists: Regular List Coffee Stuff
    FUNTENDO DS BROCODE: 2337-4364-1683
  • lostwordslostwords Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    Also, after my housemate left for a long weekend, I had a friend of mine (Sunday school teacher, no less) make about 200 copies of the photo of the Dong Man (you know the picture) at his church and distributed them throughout the house, hiding them among his clothes, under toilet lids, in boxes of cereal.

    We moved out of that house about a year ago, and we just found one of the copies taped to the inside of one of his shirts about a month ago.

    This reminds me of what we did to one friend/acquaintance who was a bit of a hobag. One drunken night, she stuck a Mike's Hard Lemonade bottle up her chocha on a dare. Gross. Also, the cap was still on. Lord knows how she didn't get her insides all cut up.

    Anyways, the next day, we went on a mission to find as many Mike's Hard Lemonade bottles as we could, which was surprisingly easy in a freshman dorm. Then we peeled off the labels and hid them all over her room. In her books, in her closet, in her bed, etc etc. A month later, she was putting on her bra, found a label in there, and cried for some odd reason. She'll never live that moment down.

    rat.jpg tumbler? steam/ps3 thingie: lostwords Amazon Wishlist!
  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Certified BrimperRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    what the fuck

    sites: personal | tumblr | abracadaniel dot com | coolguy.me
    services I recommend: tonx coffee *highly recommended* | everlane
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  • BijlBijl Registered User
    edited September 2007
    lostwords wrote: »
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    Also, after my housemate left for a long weekend, I had a friend of mine (Sunday school teacher, no less) make about 200 copies of the photo of the Dong Man (you know the picture) at his church and distributed them throughout the house, hiding them among his clothes, under toilet lids, in boxes of cereal.

    We moved out of that house about a year ago, and we just found one of the copies taped to the inside of one of his shirts about a month ago.

    This reminds me of what we did to one friend/acquaintance who was a bit of a hobag. One drunken night, she stuck a Mike's Hard Lemonade bottle up her chocha on a dare. Gross. Also, the cap was still on. Lord knows how she didn't get her insides all cut up.

    Anyways, the next day, we went on a mission to find as many Mike's Hard Lemonade bottles as we could, which was surprisingly easy in a freshman dorm. Then we peeled off the labels and hid them all over her room. In her books, in her closet, in her bed, etc etc. A month later, she was putting on her bra, found a label in there, and cried for some odd reason. She'll never live that moment down.
    wow

  • mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    Also, after my housemate left for a long weekend, I had a friend of mine (Sunday school teacher, no less) make about 200 copies of the photo of the Dong Man (you know the picture) at his church and distributed them throughout the house, hiding them among his clothes, under toilet lids, in boxes of cereal.

    We moved out of that house about a year ago, and we just found one of the copies taped to the inside of one of his shirts about a month ago.
    We got free samples of maxi pads in our mail.

    I hid them in my roommates laundry, drawers, etc.

    His girlfriend sat him down and had a very concerned talk with him.

    He probably would have punched me, if he wasn't laughing so hard.

    walrus.png
  • mullymully Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    good god the cap on?
    she must have steel insides

  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    My old roommate hated the smell of Axe Bodyspray (even more than the average girl) because when she was living in Dorms, Axe gave away a shitton of free samples on campus, the guys would take the can, duct tape the nozzle open, and toss the can into random dorm rooms.

    Raneados wrote: »
    so what SPECIFICALLY is the problem with my hole?
  • ZonugalZonugal Freelance Bio-Exorcist Adam Maitland's Model TownRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    lostwords wrote: »
    This reminds me of what we did to one friend/acquaintance who was a bit of a hobag. One drunken night, she stuck a Mike's Hard Lemonade bottle up her chocha on a dare.

    Dude...... woah...

    Beetlejuice_sig.jpg
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2007
    Holy shit, that lady must have a cavernous cooch.

    Steam name: munkus_beaver
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  • gazamcgazamc Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    One time at university me and a friend were pretty wasted. So we took a screwdriver and dismantled a guy we knew's door to get in. Then thought it would be hillarious to spray him with a POWDER fire extinguisher while he slept.

    I dont know if you have ever seen what happens when you let off a powder extinguisher.

    But he was not happy.

    And his room was very white.

  • Skull ManSkull Man Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    that's nothing

    this guy I kind of know dates a girl who has a tail

  • SeñorAmorSeñorAmor Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    My boss' brother and I convinced my boss that I was quitting. We spread it over the course of 3 days for that value-added "Oh shit he's really thinking of quitting" flavor. When we finally broke it to him, he (a mild-mannered man) cursed us for 15 minutes straight. Each time he'd start a new profanity-laden rant, it'd make us laugh even harder and pissing him off even more in the process.

    I've typed the whole story here before, and while the above paragraph doesn't really do my story justice, I'm just too damn lazy to retype it here again.

  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    gazamc wrote: »
    One time at university me and a friend were pretty wasted. So we took a screwdriver and dismantled a guy we knew's door to get in. Then thought it would be hillarious to spray him with a POWDER fire extinguisher while he slept.

    I dont know if you have ever seen what happens when you let off a powder extinguisher.

    But he was not happy.

    And his room was very white.

    When I was taking my first level of firefighting, we had just gotten back from a practical lesson, and one of my classmates jumped out of the pumper he'd riden back in. His bunker jacket got caught on the fire extinguisher just behind the passenger side door and fired off the entire twenty pounder straight down onto the truck bay floor.

    Raneados wrote: »
    so what SPECIFICALLY is the problem with my hole?
  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Skull Man wrote: »
    that's nothing

    this guy I kind of know dates a girl who has a tail

    I don't have a tail

    kQwcZLJ.png
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