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Fucking with your coworkers
Posts
I brought up in a conversation that i was 17 years old (a lie) and convinced her of it. I go off to do something, come back, and my buddy asks me how old I am a few minutes into a conversation, and I say I'm 15.
At this point, she just has a dumb look on her face. "But, like, I thought that, like, you were 17!"
This happens throughout the day, from 1 in the afternoon to 9 at night. I convinced her I was 21 at one point. By the end she just started yelling at me and throwing stuff, but still believed everything I said.
BTW, she is one of those people who thinks that dinosaurs never existed. She is THAT kind of stupid.
Be hard to replace.
In my case, I write shit-tons of Java code that isn't commented and will explode if I'm ever fired. Of course the last part is a complete lie, but what they don't know...
I also installed blue sleeve covers over the fluorescent tube bulbs in his office. Once his office was suitably strange looking, I put a big rainbow on his door.
Just this past week the nightshift manager asked me to drop him off at the "office."
The "office" being this sportsbar a good 2 miles away and he told me I can just hang out there for a while till my shift was up, then run back and punch out. :^:
"Dan could empty the safe, put it in his pockets, and flip me off..... and I'd hold the door for him on the way out."
Trunk Club
I think Vetch told me about it. (I was there well after your time, but the best stories stick)
i got me some free cupcakes
http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/TY5DML75RJ18
Or you can just have hands big enough to cock a maverick one-handed.
Easier.
Well, for me.
your = belonging to you
their = belonging to them
there = not here
they're = they are
Ahahahaha. That's God playing the best prank on you right there.
... Mr total-stranger I've-never-seen whose-tax-file-number-I-don't-have and-doesn't-even-live-in-the-same-country-as-me.
Just like Batman for his parents and Spiderman for his uncle, so too was I called to fight on the side of the law. Tax law.
Well not really.
Well this jack ass kept shining his in my eyes. So I went to the furnature department during my break and took a slip from a couch. The next time he pointed his scanner at me I held up the slip. At Fred Meyer if you have to remove and imem that cost more than $50 from an order you have to call a manager. So he had to call the manager and explain how a $399 couch ended up in his order. It was made even worse when I got him two more times.
any major dude will tell you
do you, by any chance, read Bastard Operator from Hell?
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You used to do it in the navy all the time?
Im not clicking that link.
At my night security job (walking around an apartment's parking lot, trying to be inconvenient to thieves) I sometimes twist up water bottles real tight and let the caps off, to get that big 'BOOM' sound. Don't know if it disturbs people, I just like doing it, and it's decent exercise for the forearms.
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If I was connected up to the big printer here in the office I would so do that.
It'd be especially hilarious because things are taken off this printer, taken down to the reprographics room and automatically laminated. So in the middle of some high-level military stuff would be a "You've been sharked!" image all nicely laminated and shiny.
I did that to a guy at work once but he didn't know how to fix it so I had to do it for him.
Kind of defeated the purpose.
BOFH is always a good read.
always killing/mutilating his high-turnover bosses, and never getting into shit for it. Yes, it is indeed, good fun.
Amazon wish list | My dumb deviantArt page | Steam Wishlist
This kind of loses it's appeal once you're a network admin and can just load up anybody's exchange mailbox anyway.
Marty are you pubic or private accounting? Cuz if you're public, I'm thinking we could be like the Wonder-Twins of the accounting industy. Though I should let you know that I'm in audit
Pff, audit and tax dont got nothing on SOX 404 Internal Control work.
your = belonging to you
their = belonging to them
there = not here
they're = they are
:winky:
services I recommend: tonx coffee *highly recommended* | everlane | dropbox
Like, the brutally hot shit. the kind that causes blindness and tingling of the HAIR.
Wait a minute, when did you start working with Weaver?
pun intended
Yeah, the pranks I was involved with were usually pretty asshole.
Like the one kid who thought he could be an asshole to me in one kitchen, and wouldn't believe me that I was going to burn him with the flaming metal spatula I had. Boy, was he surprised... I think his wrist still has a scar on it. But after that event we became pretty good friends.
Same place I hated one of the supervisors, but the other ones liked me and so did the manager. So, I turned our hallway with all our bulletin boards upside down. Flipped everything around, every notice, the boards, the rug, coat hanger... Everything that wasn't bolted down, i flipped upside down. Unfortunately, she didn't even notice.
Otherwise, the generic kitchen assholedness of spiking peoples drinks with random crap, cutting straws down to nothing...
yeah, was.
JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
I also work as tech support for a hosting company, this one time one of my co-workers left his station on, and man we went to town with that shit.
We changed all the important aliases we use like vi, ping, etc to do other random shit, and put on a script that would randomly crash his firefox(important because we work through an online case system) every 1 - 10 mins.
He was so pissed because he couldn't figure out how to fix the firefox thing that he went and complained to upper management because we do have a policy that says we can't fuck with anyone's station, but management told him "well, there's also the policy that states you should never ever leave your work station unlocked."
Man that was a drama week but funny as hell. :lol:
Nope, but it sounds like I definitely should. :^:
http://www.theregister.co.uk/odds/bofh/
There's a whole bunch of them, and there's others from before 2000 (links for the 2000 and on stuff is at the bottom of that page), but I can't recall where they put it. Odds are, the only place to find the oldest stuff is in the out of print book they put out a while back.
EDIT: nevermind, I found them: http://bofh.ntk.net/
Amazon wish list | My dumb deviantArt page | Steam Wishlist
When he turned the shaker upside down and started to shake it, the vinegar quickly soaked through the tissue and mixed with the baking soda, sending an impressive fountain of foam all over the damn place.
AHAHAHAHASCIENCEFAIRVOLCANOHAHAHA
Gamertag: T0NKKA - Steam: evilumpire Twitter Art blog/Portfolio!HEY SATAN!
then i handed him his phone and told him he missed a call