Weird Ass Voice Mails You Can't Explain

Okami

The Prime wrote: »

Do any of you guys know people whose voicemail message is something along the lines of, "Hello? Oh hey how's it going? What? I can't hear you, my reception is shitt-BEEP"

So the whole time you're playing along, having a conversation with this person. And when you hear the beep you are sorely disappointed.

I hate those pricks.

I call one of these people at least once a day every time I go to work.

It's terribly annoying

The Prime

In an unrelated note, my goddamn cigarette case opened in my pocket and now I have a bunch of loose tobacco in my pocket. That was not a pleasant discovery.

Captain Crunch

"h-hello m-m-man it's me char-ch-charlie and I-- AAAAAGGGHHHH!!!!!!"

That was the scariest shit ever, also, I don't know anyone named charlie...

jwalk

Okami wrote: »

The Prime wrote: »

Do any of you guys know people whose voicemail message is something along the lines of, "Hello? Oh hey how's it going? What? I can't hear you, my reception is shitt-BEEP"

So the whole time you're playing along, having a conversation with this person. And when you hear the beep you are sorely disappointed.

I hate those pricks.

I call one of these people at least once a day every time I go to work.

It's terribly annoying

harrrr.. yeah that was funny in 1978 when the first answering machines came out.

for about 2 weeks.

Also speak of the devil. I just got a phone call that went like

"hello"

*long pause*

strange asian kinda voice "operator dial 534..." then I hung up.

the hell is that about

Black Ice

A year or two ago I received some phone calls from some inner-city school 5th grade student named Arnell (the school's name was in the voice mail). Arnell wrote down his mom's number as my number, whatever the chances of that are, and he turned out to be quite the trouble maker. Arnell got into several fights from the October-December months I received the voice mail messages, getting a week of O.S.S. (out of school suspension) and a couple of I.S.S.'s (in school suspension).

I received all of this information because the messages were delivered when I was in school where I had no service, and more importantly, my phone was on silent. Despite my voice mail sounding nothing like a woman and my first name being in the voice mail recording, I kept receiving the phone calls once or twice a month. I even got a report about how he had some lead in his eye from a pencil from the school nurse.

Then the Friday that schools got out for Christmas break, I received a call from the school's principal, complaining about how Arnell didn't have his parent slip signed for the I.S.S. he had recently received. I guess Arnell didn't cover his tracks because that was the last time I got a call about Arnell.


Other random messages include costs of repair for a car ($300 for something, $800 for another, it was ridiculous how much stuff the guy was running up in this one repair bill), about a dozen eerie voice mails of nothing but breathing and then a brief click. At this point in time my voice mail is inaccessible, so I don't know if I have any new strange ones in there..but I bet I do.

Oh, and I've seen some really messed up multimedia text messages on my friend's phone. Some random person went on a rampage and was sending my friend animations of Charlie Brown, Garfield, and Disney characters having really raunchy sex. This stuff was weird. My friend had no idea who this guy was and responded with "Who is this?" to which the guy replied "o lol m ybad wrong #"

Goatmon

I got into the habit of occasionally leaving weird-ass messages on the machine of my buddy, Matt.

Last time I recall, I decided to imiatate stephen Hawking's synthetic voice

"Hello. This is Steven Hawking. I want to touch your butt." One of those things that's only amusing when done in a stupid voice.

I also do a pretty good impression of the old-man pedophile from Family Guy, and left on his machine some of the messages that were played at the end of the episode when the family had gone into hiding, and there were all those messages on their machine from the old man, like;
"Just wonderin' when the newspaper boy's gonna come by...and bring me some good news!"
He knew it was me, though, and he called me back just to say "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!"

Degjo

A friend of mine still lives at home with his parents, he also has the same name as his dad.

Whenever I call and no one picks up, I keep saying 'Art, you're a fucking faggot and a god damn loser. When you get this, call Hector back so I can belittle you some more.'

His dad gets freaked out because his boss' name is Hector and thinks that shit finally hit the fan.