Our new Indie Games subforum is now open for business in G&T. Go and check it out, you might land a code for a free game. If you're developing an indie game and want to post about it, follow these directions. If you don't, he'll break your legs! Hahaha! Seriously though.
Our rules have been updated and given their own forum. Go and look at them! They are nice, and there may be new ones that you didn't know about! Hooray for rules! Hooray for The System! Hooray for Conforming!

Creepy Uncle Whiskeyfingers gives you homework!

naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
edited February 2008 in Singularity Engine++
Look, people 'round these parts often ask me to recommend them a book. Now, I'm basically a book cannon, geared to launch great works of fiction at anyone who even hints at interest. A combination of my exhaustion, some booze, and my comically overblown sense of self-worth have caused me to create this thread, just for you, SE++. In it are some books...works of genuine and substantial literary merit that I think you should read, and--with the exception of just a few of the confirmed bibliophiles here--I am pretty sure you haven't.

But that is OK, kids. That's why this is homework.


The Stars My Destination, Alfred Bester
Where do I start with this book? How about by telling you that it's like The Count of Monte Cristo, only with rockets and teleporting maniacs and badass radioactive spies? Maybe I could let you know that most of the Cyberpunk genre can trace its roots back to this novel, written in 1956. If that's not enough, Alfred Bester was an early writer on Superman and The Green Lantern (he wrote the most famous Green Lantern Oath), and he won the very first Hugo award for a novel. This man had fucking chops.

It Can't Happen Here, Sinclair Lewis
It's OK that you haven't read this book, even though it's by Sinclair Lewis, and super famous. Really. It was out of print for basically my entire life, and has not yet entered public domain here in the US. It is a shockingly under-read book, whose dystopian view of an America dominated by theocratic fascists seems oddly prescient, especially considering that it was written in the mid-30's. If you enjoy satire (or you think that Americans have never done it well), pick up this book. And a little known fact: An adaptation of It Can't Happen Here was turned down by NBC, on account of it being "too cerebral" for viewers; later, they would dumb it down, turn the fascists into aliens, and repackage it...as V.

The Child Buyer, John Hersey
Full of arch humor and pleasantly deft social commentary, The Child Buyer is a story about a strange, ominous, and intensely creepy man in a porkpie hat, who travels around the country purchasing "hyperintelligent" children for a purpose so secret that it is only discussed "off-screen" for the bulk of the novel. Not enough for you? Try this on for size: THE CHILD BUYER IS COMPOSED ENTIRELY OF DIALOGUE. Also it has maybe the creepiest cover of all time.

The Master and Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov
Bulgakov was a stone-cold badass from early Stalinist Russia who supposedly burned the entire first version of this novel in a fit of pique, brought on by news that his play had been banned. This book has a fascinating history of underground publishing, heavily censored "official" versions, and other such political wackiness. It is a profoundly great work, centered around the devil taking a road trip to Moscow, and visiting a tortured artist who's writing a novel about Pontius Pilate. This book has so many layers, it would not be hyperbolic to say that, depending on how you look at it, it could either be The Three Stooges or Fellini's vision of Faust.
Spoiler:
In the Dutch Mountains, Cees Nooteboom
Cees Nooteboom, in addition to having a comically odd name, has a narrative style that is best described as "whimsical", and this book somehow manages to compress adventure and fantasy, strung together with fantastically subtle threads of metafiction, into a tale that feels shockingly complete despite only being about 140 pages long. The narrator of In the Dutch Mountains is perhaps the most unequivocally unique, splendidly (and consistently) voiced character ever to tell me a story. Read this now, so that wheen Nooteboom wins the Nobel Prize sometime in the next couple years, you can feel superior for having already read him.

naporeon on
·
«1

Posts

  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2008
    Good Omens is a fun read.

    WiiU: munkusbeaver
    Steam name: munkus_beaver
    Blizzard thing: munkus#1952
    Nintendo ID (3DS thinger): 0619-4510-9772
    Please give to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America: http://www.ccfa.org/
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    ·
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited February 2008
    I don't really read books

    ·
  • bsjezzbsjezz Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    woo go literature

    i also recommend bulgakov's novel, i read it right after Good Omens i think and it made me wonder how guys like gaiman can get away with the whole 'lol mythological and spiritual characters in contemporary society' trick when margarita did it so well so long before

    the pilate sections are about the most convincing biography of jesus i've read. and that's not a topic i'd likely be easly convinced on

    edit: woah strange good omens convergence there

    sig_zps00ca6d07.jpg
    ·
  • naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Yes.

    BUT THIS IS NOT A BOOK THREAD IT IS AN I GIVE YOU HOMEWORK THREAD GOD

    And Good Omens isn't on the list because it is an immensely widely read book, and is not of sufficient literary heft for me to remark upon it.

    ·
  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Hell, the premises thrown out are pretty good. Don't know when I can hit a bookstore, but I'll write this shit down.

    ·
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2008
    Well excuse me princess. I haven't read count of monte crisco either.

    WiiU: munkusbeaver
    Steam name: munkus_beaver
    Blizzard thing: munkus#1952
    Nintendo ID (3DS thinger): 0619-4510-9772
    Please give to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America: http://www.ccfa.org/
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    ·
  • UbikUbik i am a god in a french-ass restaurantRegistered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Excuse me

    Will this be on the test?

    CleezusSig_zpsfa821add.png
    ·
  • naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Well excuse me princess. I haven't read count of monte crisco either.
    Don't bother! Now you can read The Stars My Destination instead; all of the adventure and vengeance, none of the pointless and meandering minefields in the plot.

    ·
  • telcustelcus Registered User
    edited February 2008
    you had me at badass radioactive spies

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    ·
  • naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    telcus wrote: »
    you had me at badass radioactive spies
    Fucker's girlfriend has to sleep in a different room, separated by a window of transparent lead.

    Transparent lead, motherfuckers.

    ·
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Speaking of literature, Entertainment Weekly can go to Bastard's Hell for spoiling the last story arc of Y: The Last Man. They had a review of the last issue, so I started to read it and before I was two paragraphs in it, they managed to ruin a year's worth of comics. I mean, just because they don't review that many comic books doesn't mean that they can't figure out what is and what is not proper etiquette regarding a serial storyline. These people went to college after all. I figured a professional journal could actually be bothered to put together a decent review without spilling every fucking plot twist and secret from the last year of the comic.

    Apparently, I was wrong.

    So fuck you, EW, fuck you to Hell.

    ·
  • MolotovCockatooMolotovCockatoo Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    The Stars My Destination is a good book. You should all feel validated that I too approve of it and thus read it and enjoy it. GO. DO IT.

    This 'Nooteboom' you speak of intrigues me. Perhaps I will do this homework assignment.

    Killjoy wrote: »
    No jeez Orik why do you assume the worst about people?

    Because he moderates an internet forum

    http://lexiconmegatherium.tumblr.com/
    ·
  • J. GrantJ. Grant Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2008
    I just discovered that one of my favorite books of all time is virtually unknown outside of a small population of dorks who love foreign historical horror fiction.

    Get a copy of Perfume and read it, you chumps.

    ·
  • Fire TruckFire Truck Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    My girlfriend loves The Master and the Margarita. Now that someone on the internet has recommended it, I might just pick it up.

    dansmith3_zps6f7d5d05.jpg
    ·
  • Synthetic OrangeSynthetic Orange Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    I saw an anime adaptation of Count of Monte Cristo. It had mecha and French space-vampires and shit. I get the feeling that it may not have been true to the source material.

    Death to PA.
    ·
  • SoupSoup Registered User
    edited February 2008
    good omens is very rad

    ·
  • naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    J. Grant wrote: »
    I just discovered that one of my favorite books of all time is virtually unknown outside of a small population of dorks who love foreign historical horror fiction.

    Get a copy of Perfume and read it, you chumps.
    I have read this book of which you speak, and--unfortunately--I have also seen the movie. The book is splendid.

    Also, what the hell, man? I didn't know you were still alive!

    ·
  • Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited February 2008
    book megathread

    somebody ban him

    xmassig2.gif
    ·
  • naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
  • ZonkytonkmanZonkytonkman Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    i used to read like a fiend in highschool, then dropped it in uni cause i was too busy. I havn't picked it back up, mostly because it seems like a huge time investment to read books at random, hoping to find a good one. A reccomend list is exactly what i need. Thanks nap. I 'll mosey by the library sometime today and see if i cna find these

    Spoiler:
    ·
  • Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited February 2008
    well you've got that in spades, don'tcha

    xmassig2.gif
    ·
  • heretoinformheretoinform __BANNED USERS
    edited February 2008
    Perfume is a pretty popular book.


    And I fortunately saw the movie. I don't know what you're talking about, I thought it was a good adaptation.

    Socialism is the concrete foundation of America. Capitalism is the flimsy tin shack that sits upon it.
    ·
  • naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    well you've got that in spades, don'tcha
    Yes.

    If only I could master it as you've mastered poor taste.

    Alas....

    ·
  • Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited February 2008
    naporeon wrote: »
    well you've got that in spades, don'tcha
    Yes.

    If only I could master it as you've mastered poor taste.

    Alas....

    lick my sack, frenchy

    xmassig2.gif
    ·
  • scarlet ave.scarlet ave. Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Thucydides, The Peloponnesian War.

    Ah, top of the page. Just where Thucydides deserves to be.

    ·
  • naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    naporeon wrote: »
    well you've got that in spades, don'tcha
    Yes.

    If only I could master it as you've mastered poor taste.

    Alas....

    lick my sack, frenchy
    Present it, pal.

    ·
  • edited February 2008
    i might read your books but what's in it for me?

    ·
  • naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    bongi wrote: »
    i might read your books but what's in it for me?
    That depends.

    What are you asking?

    ·
  • Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited February 2008
    you'll get a smug sense of self-satisfaction

    and an alliteration addiction, also

    xmassig2.gif
    ·
  • edited February 2008
    naporeon wrote: »
    bongi wrote: »
    i might read your books but what's in it for me?
    That depends.

    What are you asking?

    blowjobs

    ·
  • ascotascot Registered User
    edited February 2008
    You know, with all the hitting on Nap that Bongi does, I'm unsure whether Nap is actually gay or not

    ·
  • MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    ascot wrote: »
    You know, with all the hitting on Nap that Bongi does, I'm unsure whether Nap is actually gay or not

    ask wam

    do not ask for whom the snerd tolls
    ·
  • edited February 2008
    i barely hit on nap at all

    ·
  • ascotascot Registered User
    edited February 2008
    Is she dating him now?

    and, yeah, you do

    ·
  • MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Apparently she goes shoe shopping with nap

    do not ask for whom the snerd tolls
    ·
  • PhonehandPhonehand Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    i'm dating the last carpetbagger

    pmdunk.jpg
    ·
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Damnit. I already have enough books to read.

    ·
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User
    edited February 2008
    i haven't been reading at all lately

    in two months i only read a discworld book and brave new world

    pshh

    ·
  • ZonkytonkmanZonkytonkman Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    Apparently she goes shoe shopping with nap

    nap is terribly at shoes

    he told me my loafers were boots

    BOOTS

    THEY AREN'T EVEN ABOVE MY ANKLES

    Spoiler:
    ·
  • MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    Apparently she goes shoe shopping with nap

    nap is terribly at shoes

    he told me my loafers were boots

    BOOTS

    THEY AREN'T EVEN ABOVE MY ANKLES

    God

    He said that because you're from Canada

    Also I would ask for books but he'd probably recommend "Everybody Poops" or something.

    do not ask for whom the snerd tolls
    ·
«1
Sign In or Register to comment.