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Uwe Boll's Origin Movie? Far Cry the Movie Trailer

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  • randombattlerandombattle Registered User
    You would think Uwe Boll would of tried to find some way to film in the Bahamas or something for the sole fact that he could act like it was a big vacation in the Bahamas..

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    I never asked for this!
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    Hibiki wrote: »
    how is he still making movies? I thought germany closed that loop hole.

    My understanding is, even though that loop hole was closed, the way it worked a great many movies that were announced while the loop hole was still open, even though they didn't even have directors or even scripts yet, still benefit.

    I think it was closed before Far Cry even came out, though, so I doubt the movie was announced that early. At this point he's just putting out as much cheap crap as he can and hoping for the best. All he needs is one billion dollar gross to make it all worthwhile.
    Spoiler:

  • DashuiDashui Registered User regular
    Didn't he say that once he finished shooting all the movies for the licenses he had, he would stop making game to movie adaptions? Maybe that's because the loop hole is closed. :P I'm pretty sure he said this at one point, with Far Cry being the last, or close to the last, game license he had.

    But seriously, is no one peeved that Don S. Davis in his this? Poor guy, doing a Uwe Boll film. :(

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  • TaramoorTaramoor Registered User regular
    Hevach wrote: »
    Hibiki wrote: »
    how is he still making movies? I thought germany closed that loop hole.

    My understanding is, even though that loop hole was closed, the way it worked a great many movies that were announced while the loop hole was still open, even though they didn't even have directors or even scripts yet, still benefit.

    I think it was closed before Far Cry even came out, though, so I doubt the movie was announced that early. At this point he's just putting out as much cheap crap as he can and hoping for the best. All he needs is one billion dollar gross to make it all worthwhile.
    Spoiler:

    Actually, the loop hole didn't close until the first of this year, any movie that had begun production before then still abides by the same tax law.

    So, as some have pointed out, Uwe Boll put about eighteen movies into pre-production before the end of the year, and has declared that he will officially retire after they're completed.

    So... yeah. He's not even trying to hide it.

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  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    This year? You know, I stopped arguing a good two years ago with people who "would know a lot better" than me who said the loophole had been closed for several years. Wish I'd been a bit more persistent now.

  • MblackwellMblackwell Registered User regular
    As long as there's a poorly executed sex scene, lots of guns, and nu metal, I think we'll have a winner.

  • DashuiDashui Registered User regular
    Mblackwell wrote: »
    As long as there's a poorly executed sex scene, lots of guns, and nu metal, I think we'll have a winner.

    You can expect a poorly executed sex scene in every single one of his movies, as well as ridiculously gratuitous gore where the actors getting stabbed, slashed, or punched, or doing them, look like they have no idea how to respond or what to do next. It was almost amusing watching the battle scenes in Bloodrayne because of that. I especially liked how Michael Madsen swung his sword so slow that it wouldn't even give you a paper cut, and yet managed to splice open stomachs and faces, all the while looking drunk and bored.

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  • Dublo7Dublo7 Registered User regular
    This movie looks about as interesting as dirt on a footpath.

    Note Boll's attempts at humor. Oh hahahah, a fat guy. Oh hahaha, a boner joke.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • MblackwellMblackwell Registered User regular
    Dashui wrote: »
    Mblackwell wrote: »
    As long as there's a poorly executed sex scene, lots of guns, and nu metal, I think we'll have a winner.

    You can expect a poorly executed sex scene in every single one of his movies...

    I... I knew that.... that was the joke... :(

  • psycojesterpsycojester Registered User regular
    I love the fact that Farcry has close to zero story, its a man in a gaudy red shirt shooting at mercenaries and giant mutants on a tropical island and Uwe Bolle still managed to get it 100% wrong.

    Also i love the line between the journalist and her boss

    Him: "its a ludicriously stupid and improbable story"

    Her: "Its just too good to pass up"

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • LunysgwenLunysgwen Registered User regular
    While this guy has the 'Worst movies ever made' under his belt. Eventually, he has to put out something half decent, and even a monkey can learn something after doing it repetitively. "Practice makes perfect." Right?

    Falstaff wrote: »
    Edit: never let a bitch bait you into shooting your goo early. You'll end up too exhausted to do anything useful when the real action starts.
    Spoiler:
  • ZzuluZzulu Registered User regular
    This already looks awful


    At least it has yuri.

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  • cloudeaglecloudeagle Registered User regular
    Hopefully he'll run out of money soon... In the Name of the King cost $60 million to make, and it brought in MAYBE $5 million worldwide. I doubt DVD sales could help him recover the loss.

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  • KageraKagera Registered User regular
    I'll reiterate what I first thought.

    General Hammond, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

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  • MarvellousMMarvellousM Registered User
    Wow! Udo Kier, Ralf Moeller, Michael Paré and Craig Fairbrass! Together at last!

  • MblackwellMblackwell Registered User regular
    cloudeagle wrote: »
    Hopefully he'll run out of money soon... In the Name of the King cost $60 million to make, and it brought in MAYBE $5 million worldwide. I doubt DVD sales could help him recover the loss.

    The less money it makes, the more money he makes. No... really...

  • SnorkSnork Registered User regular
    Kagera wrote: »
    I'll reiterate what I first thought.

    General Hammond, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
    D:

  • cooljammer00cooljammer00 Cleaning at Your Mom's HouseRegistered User regular
    I love how you guys give him the benefit of the doubt every time.

    "It has to be better than the last movie!" and it NEVER IS.

  • Torso BoyTorso Boy Registered User
    ...is that the theme from Batman Begins playing at the beginning of that trailer?

    Rent wrote: »
    So that's what having no idea what you are talking about looks like
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    cloudeagle wrote: »
    Hopefully he'll run out of money soon... In the Name of the King cost $60 million to make, and it brought in MAYBE $5 million worldwide. I doubt DVD sales could help him recover the loss.

    Actually, if it made up the $55 million loss, he'd end up broke.

    How it worked until two months ago: When a film is announced in Germany, the investors gets an immediate tax deduction for the budget, even if the movie doesn't have a script or a hope in hell of being made, so investors there have been known to use film investments to delay tax payments.

    Now, budget your movie for $50 million, get German investors (If you're an American, sell the movie rights to a German investor and license it back from him using his own money). The movie sucks, and doesn't stand a chance of succeeding, and when they do, the real magic happens and my understanding is in the end, the German taxpayers end up footing the bill. Better yet, let's just say for the sake of discussion that $50 million budget includes a $20 million paycheck for the director.

    If the movie succeeds, he could be stuck paying back investors plus a profit share. Where will he be then?

    As said last page, they've closed the loophole, but movies already under it will go forward, at the end of which the world will be free of the likes of Uwe Boll.

    Edit: The loophole did get used to get easy funding for real movies, too. From the articles I found on it, even Lord of the Rings used it. I'm pretty sure Investors get paid back in the end that way, so the taxpayers don't get the final bill, but it's still an exercise in creative math.
    Torso Boy wrote: »
    ...is that the theme from Batman Begins playing at the beginning of that trailer?

    I thought that too. Music gets recycled a lot in trailers. I remember when I saw the Cinderella Man trailer, the music from it was out of the soundtrack for Children of Dune. I didn't see the movie itself, but read later that it didn't use the same music as the trailer.

  • victor_c26victor_c26 Registered User regular
    Yes, yes it is.

    He either straight up used it without permission, or he got permission in writing. Both infuriating mind you.

    And seriously, was everything done with the first take? Every scene in that trailer smacks of the cast just blowing through the scene because they think the director is going to lead them into the right direction by correcting their performance with multiple takes, oh but wait, that scene was perfect according to Mr. Director here, so I guess it turned out alright. Rinse and repeat with each scene.

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  • FugaFuga Registered User
    What?
    So there IS actually a super soldier in Far Cry? Didn't play it for long, so thought it was just some made up crap.

  • xWonderboyxxWonderboyx Registered User
    Fuga wrote: »
    What?
    So there IS actually a super soldier in Far Cry? Didn't play it for long, so thought it was just some made up crap.

    They were more like little monkey things that could one hit kill you. Then there were giant monkey things with rocket launchers that could one hit kill you.

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  • My Name Is LukeMy Name Is Luke Registered User
    Where the hell is his bright red Hawaiian shirt??

  • PancakePancake Registered User
    Where the hell is his bright red Hawaiian shirt??

    Actually, when they first start showing Carver while he's on his boat, he's wearing a bright red Hawaiian shirt. It's gone by the time he's doing action movie things, though.

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  • ThreepioThreepio Registered User regular
    Cloudman wrote: »
    Wait, I thought Far Cry took place on a tropical island, not in the middle of extremely recognizable Vancouver.

    Seriously, the trailer plays like my drive to work.

    Which, given the most recent developments in our Taco Del Mar/Starbucks locations, includes the explosions.

    Edit: Also, someone in the German tax departments watched The Producers too many times.

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  • Fig-DFig-D Registered User regular
    As to General Hammond's part in the FarCry movie I'd like to remind you that Don S. Davis is an actor, this is what he does when he goes to work.

    I believe Michael Caine while refering to Jaws: The Revenge was quoted as say something along the lines of: good movie? It was complete rubbish, but I love the house it bought me. (not using quotation marks because it's not a direct quote but you get the idea.)

    EDIT: Eureka! I have found it! Michael Caine on Jaws: The Revenge - "I have never seen the film, but by all accounts it was terrible. However I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific."

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  • CervetusCervetus Registered User regular
    Hevach wrote: »
    Torso Boy wrote: »
    ...is that the theme from Batman Begins playing at the beginning of that trailer?

    I thought that too. Music gets recycled a lot in trailers. I remember when I saw the Cinderella Man trailer, the music from it was out of the soundtrack for Children of Dune. I didn't see the movie itself, but read later that it didn't use the same music as the trailer.

    Hell, Requiem for a Tower seems to be used in every other trailer these days.
    Fig-D wrote: »
    As to General Hammond's part in the FarCry movie I'd like to remind you that Don S. Davis is an actor, this is what he does when he goes to work.

    I believe Michael Caine while refering to Jaws: The Revenge was quoted as say something along the lines of: good movie? It was complete rubbish, but I love the house it bought me. (not using quotation marks because it's not a direct quote but you get the idea.)

    EDIT: Eureka! I have found it! Michael Caine on Jaws: The Revenge - "I have never seen the film, but by all accounts it was terrible. However I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific."

    But it's worse when that house is paid for by taxpayers instead of stupid people with really bad taste.

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  • fearsomepiratefearsomepirate I ate a pickle once. Registered User regular
    You can't ruin Far Cry? People said the same thing about Doom...it's just about shooting demons on Mars. Well, Uwe Boll surprised the world by deciding that the Doom movie should be about diseased mutants instead of demons. Now here we are with Far Cry, where the ONLY thing you have to do to get the game right is have a dude shooting random crap on a tropical island. So what's Boll do? Take out the tropical island. Brilliant.

    Nobody makes me bleed my own blood...nobody.
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  • ruzkinruzkin Registered User regular
    Fearsomepirate - what are you talking about? Doom was directed by Andrej Bartkowiak.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andrzej_Bartkowiak

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  • agoajagoaj Play It Loud! Get N Or Get OutRegistered User regular
    You can't ruin Far Cry? People said the same thing about Doom...it's just about shooting demons on Mars. Well, Uwe Boll surprised the world by deciding that the Doom movie should be about diseased mutants instead of demons. Now here we are with Far Cry, where the ONLY thing you have to do to get the game right is have a dude shooting random crap on a tropical island. So what's Boll do? Take out the tropical island. Brilliant.

    That would be a surprise since Boll didn't work on Doom. In fact, he thought it was too close to the game.

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  • Tom AtoTom Ato Registered User
    A poorly filmed movie based on a game starring the usual Sci-Fi channel movie stars.

    I'm sure it will do very well.

  • Captain ElevenCaptain Eleven The last card is a kronk Registered User regular
    Tom Ato wrote: »
    A poorly filmed movie based on a game starring the usual Sci-Fi channel movie stars.

    I'm sure it will do very well.

    How dare you speak thus of Don S. Davis. Repent, and beg forgiveness.
    Spoiler:

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  • themocawthemocaw Registered User regular
    I love the fact that Jack Carver has a heavy Eastern European accent.

  • Tom AtoTom Ato Registered User
    themocaw wrote: »
    I love the fact that Jack Carver has a heavy Eastern European accent.

    It's Guile all over again.
    Spoiler:

  • MgcwMgcw Registered User regular
    Jasconius wrote: »
    I did not know Uwe Bolle was doing a Far Cry movie. The whole time I was watching this trailer I was trying to convince myself that this was a joke.

    Then I had to check IMDB to confirm.

    I cannot believe this is real.

    He's had the fucking rights since before the game was released. I don't know why this is surprising people.

  • themocawthemocaw Registered User regular
    Tom Ato wrote: »
    themocaw wrote: »
    I love the fact that Jack Carver has a heavy Eastern European accent.

    It's Guile all over again.
    Spoiler:

    "You'd have to be crazy to go up there!"

    "Tankfully Baison haz drivoon me eensaine."

  • FyreWulffFyreWulff Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Mgcw wrote: »
    Jasconius wrote: »
    I did not know Uwe Bolle was doing a Far Cry movie. The whole time I was watching this trailer I was trying to convince myself that this was a joke.

    Then I had to check IMDB to confirm.

    I cannot believe this is real.

    He's had the fucking rights since before the game was released. I don't know why this is surprising people.

    Yeah.. I was wondering about that. Because I remember this being one of his first movies he was going to make.

  • cooljammer00cooljammer00 Cleaning at Your Mom's HouseRegistered User regular
    I played that free McDonald's Far Cry. I was cheating, unloading clips of Rockets into the super soldiers and monkeys, and they just wouldn't die. How the hell were you supposed to win without cheating?

  • MorninglordMorninglord Registered User regular
    The only amazing thing about the game was it's graphical representation of jungle in huge levels you could freely navigate. In other words, it's gameplay. There's no way to put that in a movie, you don't interact with a movie. I'm not sure why people even care that it's going to be a bad movie. Steven Spielberg couldn't make it a good movie.
    The tropical island thing was just an excuse for no police or civilians to try and stop you/get in the way. Plot was completely irrelevant to the game.

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