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Meet your new President of the United States

13

Posts

  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus ha ha just kidding I'm Frog ManRegistered User regular
    edited February 2008
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    But this is a War on Terrorism.

    HOW CAN YOU SETUP BASES IN AND OCCUPY TERRORISM?

    You can't.

    But you can topple the governments of countries that support terrorism and occupy them.

    The "war on terrorism" is a lot like the "war on drugs", in that they aren't real wars by definition.

    The war on Afghanistan was a good idea and well carried out, for the most part. However, like most everything else Bush has started, the follow-through is sorely lacking.

  • canemaquiluscanemaquilus Registered User
    edited February 2008
    Ruckus wrote: »
    Goddamn it.

    If your federal election isn't a fucking landslide for Obama you should all be issued helmets.

    There, I said it.

    A vote for anyone else is a vote for Retardation.

    Right, because all conservatives are retarded.

    Moron.

    Since Eisenhower? Yeah basically.

    The conservative party aint what it used to be.

  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Super Moderator, Moderator mod
    edited February 2008
    Tonkka wrote: »
    Dakal wrote: »
    who ok'd the whole subprime mortgage thing anyway?

    IT WAS MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    Dude I told you it was gunna be awesome!

  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Ooooooh big scary Ralph Nader is out to get you!
    Like Dyna said, he'll be lucky to get more than a dozen votes.
    Maybe he'll pick Ron Paul as his running mate.

    nevillexmassig1.png
  • NotASenatorNotASenator Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    This is such important news that Politico has stories about it on their front page, and so does CNN's Politics page, and MSNBC.com.

    Except none of those things are true.

  • Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    mrpaku wrote: »
    For all the bad stuff Bush has done, the war in Afghanistan was quick and clean and knocked out a huge base of terrorist support.

    this is one of a handful of things i actually give him credit for

    What? There are still NATO forces in Afghanistan.

    no, see, in America that war's over

    xmassig2.gif
  • Fire TruckFire Truck Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Ruckus wrote: »
    He was still a better choice than Gore.
    I refuse to believe that Gore would have shat all over the role of executive power.

    He would have had the exact same reaction to 9/11 that Clinton had to the terrorist attacks that happened during his Presidency, which would have resulted in things getting a whole lot worse.

    For all the bad stuff Bush has done, the war in Afghanistan was quick and clean and knocked out a huge base of terrorist support.

    Uh, it's not done yet.

    We're most likely recommitting until 2011, and we hope to have the Afghan National Army somewhat trained by then.

    The war is over, we're into the occupation now. It's a whole different thing. World War II ended in 1945, but we didn't leave Germany until 1949. We have never completely left anyhow. Granted, the resistance to the occupation is stronger than the Nazi holdouts in Germany, but once you've dismantled the government of a country and set up bases inside of it, the war portion of your offensive is over.

    Except, of course, in Germany, the nazis did not remain an important political force poised to retake the country, and the US was actually involved in occupying the country.

    whoops.jpg

    dansmith3_zps6f7d5d05.jpg
  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    At least we won that war on drugs.

    1LRdqui.png
  • A CrowA Crow Registered User
    edited February 2008
    At least we won that war on drugs.

    Some of those D.A.R.E. troops never came back the same.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • ThatDudeOverThereThatDudeOverThere Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    potatoe wrote: »
    i think i'll just write myself in

    Potatoe for My Bedroom '08

    PqhbDd2.png
    My Youtube My Steam SMITE IGN: TDOTCRFH4 come SMITE with me
  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    that's a campaign i can get behind

    I tried to write "but that" and my hands naturally wrote "butt hat", which is vastly superior in every way.
  • ThatDudeOverThereThatDudeOverThere Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    and that's not all you can get behind

    if you follow me

    if you catch my drift

    if you are picking up what I am throwing down

    if you are winky emoticon

    PqhbDd2.png
    My Youtube My Steam SMITE IGN: TDOTCRFH4 come SMITE with me
  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    wait, i thought you were going to catch my drift

    I tried to write "but that" and my hands naturally wrote "butt hat", which is vastly superior in every way.
  • Cosmic SombreroCosmic Sombrero Registered User
    edited February 2008
    i believe gore would have been another carter, and while I agree with a lot of carter's views on executive power, this is not a situation where we need to be viewed as weak.

    republicans walk like this
    democrats walk like this
    libertarians get beat up

  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2008
    Any man who gets the nobel peace prize for an environmental propaganda movie shouldn't be president.

    Steam name: munkus_beaver
    Blizzard thing: munkus#1952
    Nintendo ID (3DS thinger): 0619-4510-9772
    Please give to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America: http://www.ccfa.org/
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
  • DakalDakal Registered User
    edited February 2008
    Any man who gets the nobel peace prize for an environmental propaganda movie shouldn't be president.

    Why not?

  • Dublo7Dublo7 Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Any man who gets the nobel peace prize for an environmental propaganda movie shouldn't be president.

    :|

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
  • DakalDakal Registered User
    edited February 2008
    Dang march of the penguins

    Am I doing this right?

  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Any man who gets the nobel peace prize for an environmental propaganda movie shouldn't be president.

    i could care less about his views on the enviroment

    al gore could've been a homeless man who fucked dogs, threw them in garbage bags and set them on fire

    he was still a billion times better than the alternative

  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus ha ha just kidding I'm Frog ManRegistered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Fire Truck wrote: »
    Ruckus wrote: »
    He was still a better choice than Gore.
    I refuse to believe that Gore would have shat all over the role of executive power.

    He would have had the exact same reaction to 9/11 that Clinton had to the terrorist attacks that happened during his Presidency, which would have resulted in things getting a whole lot worse.

    For all the bad stuff Bush has done, the war in Afghanistan was quick and clean and knocked out a huge base of terrorist support.

    Uh, it's not done yet.

    We're most likely recommitting until 2011, and we hope to have the Afghan National Army somewhat trained by then.

    The war is over, we're into the occupation now. It's a whole different thing. World War II ended in 1945, but we didn't leave Germany until 1949. We have never completely left anyhow. Granted, the resistance to the occupation is stronger than the Nazi holdouts in Germany, but once you've dismantled the government of a country and set up bases inside of it, the war portion of your offensive is over.

    Except, of course, in Germany, the nazis did not remain an important political force poised to retake the country, and the US was actually involved in occupying the country.

    whoops.jpg

    The US is involved with occupying Afghanistan. There are American troops in the combined NATO force in the country. Also, the Taliban is a few holdouts hiding in the hills, not an important political force. They couldn't retake the country if they tried.

    Where on earth are you getting this information?

  • NotASenatorNotASenator Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Seriously, I'd love for you to tell my buddy from school who just got back from a tour in Afghanistan that he wasn't actually there.

  • PicklesPickles Registered User
    edited February 2008
    lostwords wrote: »
    id2.jpg

    I'm pretty sure after the 2000 and 2004 elections that the general populace of the U.S. is well ahead of the timeline portrayed in this movie.

    EDIT: No, I'm certain.

    Spoiler:
  • A CrowA Crow Registered User
    edited February 2008
    Pickles wrote: »
    lostwords wrote: »
    id2.jpg

    I'm pretty sure after the 2000 and 2004 elections that the general populace of the U.S. is well ahead of the timeline portrayed in this movie.

    EDIT: No, I'm certain.

    All I need now is my starbucks an 'batin' hour

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • NotASenatorNotASenator Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Pickles wrote: »
    lostwords wrote: »
    id2.jpg

    I'm pretty sure after the 2000 and 2004 elections that the general populace of the U.S. is well ahead of the timeline portrayed in this movie.

    EDIT: No, I'm certain.

    What no

  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Fire Truck wrote: »
    Ruckus wrote: »
    He was still a better choice than Gore.
    I refuse to believe that Gore would have shat all over the role of executive power.

    He would have had the exact same reaction to 9/11 that Clinton had to the terrorist attacks that happened during his Presidency, which would have resulted in things getting a whole lot worse.

    For all the bad stuff Bush has done, the war in Afghanistan was quick and clean and knocked out a huge base of terrorist support.

    Uh, it's not done yet.

    We're most likely recommitting until 2011, and we hope to have the Afghan National Army somewhat trained by then.

    The war is over, we're into the occupation now. It's a whole different thing. World War II ended in 1945, but we didn't leave Germany until 1949. We have never completely left anyhow. Granted, the resistance to the occupation is stronger than the Nazi holdouts in Germany, but once you've dismantled the government of a country and set up bases inside of it, the war portion of your offensive is over.

    Except, of course, in Germany, the nazis did not remain an important political force poised to retake the country, and the US was actually involved in occupying the country.

    whoops.jpg

    The US is involved with occupying Afghanistan. There are American troops in the combined NATO force in the country. Also, the Taliban is a few holdouts hiding in the hills, not an important political force. They couldn't retake the country if they tried.

    Where on earth are you getting this information?

    There's a reason we're buying Leopard 2A6M tanks and sending them straight to Kandahar. There's still thousands of insurgents that keep retreating to the mountains over winter then sneaking back down during the spring to plant mines and IED's.

    Raneados wrote: »
    so what SPECIFICALLY is the problem with my hole?
  • PicklesPickles Registered User
    edited February 2008
    A Crow wrote: »
    Pickles wrote: »
    lostwords wrote: »

    I'm pretty sure after the 2000 and 2004 elections that the general populace of the U.S. is well ahead of the timeline portrayed in this movie.

    EDIT: No, I'm certain.

    All I need now is my starbucks an 'batin' hour

    Have you gone to Starbucks today? It might be on the menu after their corporation-wide mandatory 3 hour "training" session yesterday.

    Spoiler:
  • edited February 2008
    mccain has such a funny shaped head

  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    I know it's been said, but Nader's run for President doesn't even warrant this thread.

    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • Lord DaveLord Dave Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    I'm going to vote for Nader because he has the best name.

    Denny's is for winners.
    mkc.pngmkc.pngmkc.pngmontykevin.png
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Anjin-San wrote: »
    Any man who gets the nobel peace prize for an environmental propaganda movie shouldn't be president.

    i could care less about his views on the enviroment

    al gore could've been a homeless man who fucked dogs, threw them in garbage bags and set them on fire

    he was still a billion times better than the alternative

    No, he was a nothing candidate. His views shifted daily based on the polls. He completely failed to have any real value, and just blatantly said what we wanted to hear. Bush sucks, but at least he pretty much sold himself as the cowboy that he turned out to be. Also, Bush wasn't great for civil liberties, but Gore had already shown himself to be pro-censorship, so fuck him. And then Kerry, what the fuck? His whole platform was "I'm just like Bush in many ways, except that I am not actually Bush."

    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • Lord DaveLord Dave Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Defender wrote: »
    Anjin-San wrote: »
    Any man who gets the nobel peace prize for an environmental propaganda movie shouldn't be president.

    i could care less about his views on the enviroment

    al gore could've been a homeless man who fucked dogs, threw them in garbage bags and set them on fire

    he was still a billion times better than the alternative

    No, he was a nothing candidate. His views shifted daily based on the polls. He completely failed to have any real value, and just blatantly said what we wanted to hear. Bush sucks, but at least he pretty much sold himself as the cowboy that he turned out to be. Also, Bush wasn't great for civil liberties, but Gore had already shown himself to be pro-censorship, so fuck him. And then Kerry, what the fuck? His whole platform was "I'm just like Bush in many ways, except that I am not actually Bush."

    "also you're stupid. vote for me, idiot."

    Denny's is for winners.
    mkc.pngmkc.pngmkc.pngmontykevin.png
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    haha

    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • ThatDudeOverThereThatDudeOverThere Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    no see that's defender's campaign slogan

    PqhbDd2.png
    My Youtube My Steam SMITE IGN: TDOTCRFH4 come SMITE with me
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    A vote for anyone else is wrong and dumb. Kill yourself, you horrible faggot.

    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • RingoRingo Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    George Bush taught me to hate.

    ceres wrote: »
    I'm just going to go ahead and lock this thread before I feel any worse about humanity.
    Edcrab's Exigency RPG now featured at the Exigency Forum
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
  • ThatDudeOverThereThatDudeOverThere Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    the best thing about that guy's cartoons is that if I didn't already know they were from the onion I'd absolutely think he was serious

    PqhbDd2.png
    My Youtube My Steam SMITE IGN: TDOTCRFH4 come SMITE with me
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    I don't get it.

    Was it supposed to be that lame on purpose?

    Raneados wrote: »
    so what SPECIFICALLY is the problem with my hole?
  • ThatDudeOverThereThatDudeOverThere Registered User regular
    edited February 2008
    Yes, that's the entire point.

    Like everything else on the Onion, it's absolutely dedicated to looking like something from a legitimate news source in every respect, even at the occasional expense of the humor.

    PqhbDd2.png
    My Youtube My Steam SMITE IGN: TDOTCRFH4 come SMITE with me
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