King Leer (bet your earnings on page 77) (No Porn- Orikae)

B.C.

Dammit I guess I didn't pay him enough.

Fiz

Back from my date with Paul. We saw Hootie and the Blowfish. It was awesome.

Until we left the concert and things got violent. He tossed me to the floor like a gypsy slut and covered my face with his clown whiteness. Everything is sore.

Air

hes just building you up to the point where youll do anything he says
then hes gonna sell you to his dealer

Butler

Fiz that second sentence is like something Rorschach would say.

EDIT: Well, second paragraph, but you all knew what I meant.

BlackCloud

Fiz wrote: »

Back from my date with Paul. We saw Hootie and the Blowfish. It was awesome.

Until we left the concert and things got violent. He tossed me to the floor like a gypsy slut and covered my face with his clown whiteness. Everything is sore.

Do i sense jealousy since all you have is a vibrator?

435

Pony wrote: »

you guys ever had an empty orgasm?

like

you had the sensation of an orgasm, but you've already blown your load repeatedly over the past hour or so and now nothing comes out?

it's pretty weird

I've had more non-ejaculate orgasms than I can count. They're pretty awesome. I used to do kegels to force it to happen because I wanted to continue having sex after orgasm.

Popping your load is sometimes good, but, man... Coming two or three times before actually letting loose can be fucking amazing.

Cold Salmon and Hatred

My friend told me about this porn he once saw

and the dude was a midget

and the girl spent the entire porno laughing at the guy

Meister

Aw fuck, I missed out on another one of these. I'm always away from the forums or just ignore the threads when these competitions come around. Now I have to wait another year or however long for another one to pop up.

Meissnerd

you like it when I have sex with you

huh

yeaaahhh I bet you do all bringing you to orgasm yeah

Cold Salmon and Hatred

I am going to stick my dick in you now

unf.

unf.

that feels so good

Meissnerd

I swear it's like Seinfeld is producing half the porn I watch

Butler

SO WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH HOW HARD I'M FUCKING YOUR ASS?

Polago

435 wrote: »

Pony wrote: »

you guys ever had an empty orgasm?

like

you had the sensation of an orgasm, but you've already blown your load repeatedly over the past hour or so and now nothing comes out?

it's pretty weird

I've had more non-ejaculate orgasms than I can count. They're pretty awesome. I used to do kegels to force it to happen because I wanted to continue having sex after orgasm.

Popping your load is sometimes good, but, man... Coming two or three times before actually letting loose can be fucking amazing.

Completely agreeing with this.

435 knows his shit.

Fiz

Ugh. They are having me stand next to the guy in the opera chorus that I am so horribly attracted to but he is straight and possibly in a Christian Rock band. I can't even talk to him because I lack any form of tact.

The last time I talked to him I think I asked him to take off his shirt and dance around. This was in response to him asking how I was doing that night

BlackCloud

Fiz wrote: »

Ugh. They are having me stand next to the guy in the opera chorus that I am so horribly attracted to but he is straight and possibly in a Christian Rock band. I can't even talk to him because I lack any form of tact.

The last time I talked to him I think I asked him to take off his shirt and dance around. This was in response to him asking how I was doing that night

"Hey, how are you doing tonight?"

"I'm great, FUCK ME IN THE ASS UNTIL I CRY."

DodgeBlan

sexy tourettes.

casper_27d

Fiz wrote: »

Ugh. They are having me stand next to the guy in the opera chorus that I am so horribly attracted to but he is straight and possibly in a Christian Rock band. I can't even talk to him because I lack any form of tact.

The last time I talked to him I think I asked him to take off his shirt and dance around. This was in response to him asking how I was doing that night

Just tell him that the Bible says to love thy brother and that by hooking up with you he is completing Gods will.

B.C.

Casper has done nothing but be correct in this thread.

Einhander

Yeah, Casper you are my favorite dude right now.

Assuming you don't get Stop-Loss'd I will buy you a beer at PAX '09.

Just remind me before then because I will forget.

Mr. Henry Bemis

Butler wrote: »

SO WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH HOW HARD I'M FUCKING YOUR ASS?

hahaha

BlackCloud

PS I'm still in.

Einhander

Gentlemen this thread is dying
Everyone else is probably lying
I can hear my penis crying
For my libido I'm denying

Because porn I've not been eyeing
For my attention it has been is vying

Yes my cock is really trying
My excuses it is not buying
So many feelings it is supplying
So much pressure it is applying

All these urges I've been denying!
All these women I've been sighing!
On my cock my hand is overlying!
And my semen it is drying!

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Spoiler:

I'M OUT BITCHES!

Big Red Tie

it's beautiful

Moriveth

that is possibly the best way to announce it.

Raneados

yeah this thread is failing to be interesting

we need hourly status reports with crying and what porn you will use to free yourselves

Label

All I can imagine now is Gene Wilder and rainbow splotched cumspray. Glorious.

DodgeBlan

Einhander's contract also requires him to detail what took him out, unless that delightful post means it was Gene Wilder.

Einhander

It was like five office chicks having some kind of staff meeting, involving getting naked and stuff. I got it bad for a woman (or in this case a group of women) in uniform.

But, if quetzi wants something less vanilla he can say I lost to Chirpy or Swap.avi* or something.

*Or as I like to call it, 4girlsnocup

Big Red Tie

Einhander wrote: »

It was like five office chicks having some kind of staff meeting, involving getting naked and stuff. I got it bad for a woman (or in this case a group of women) in uniform.

But, if quetzi wants something less vanilla he can say I lost to Chirpy or Swap.avi* or something.

*Or as I like to call it, 4girlsnocup

what kind of staff meeting is that

Spoiler:

but i bet your staff was enjoying it

Spoiler:

oh god

casper_27d

I am most likely a lifer but I have 3 deployments worth of cash and over 70 days of leave saved up. I will make it to PAX 09.

Einhander

Me and you buddy, seventy days in Vegas.

We'll live like kings, spending your cash on hookers and blow and blackjack.

What do you say?

casper_27d

Well that would be fun but I am not allowed in a couple of the casinos do to a small fight that a group a people I was with may or may not have started last time we got back from Iraq.

Jimothy

Einhander, that was phenomenal.

But I'm surprised you gave up when you got this close to the month-mark.

Fiz

I am glad somebody finally left. Cheating is a string word which is very appropriate for some of you

B.C.

Einhander.
<3

IpseDixit

Fiz wrote: »

I am glad somebody finally left. Cheating is a string word which is very appropriate for some of you

A string word?

Like string theory?

Einhander

casper_27d wrote: »

Well that would be fun but I am not allowed in a couple of the casinos do to a small fight that a group a people I was with may or may not have started last time we got back from Iraq.

We will get you a fake mustache, it'll be fine.

Also goddamn you guys, my load.

God damn

I mean I wish I would have had a measuring cup or something. For science, I mean.

Also yeah I was close to a month, but at the same time I started poppin boners at work and man that could be awkward. Also, there are several good looking ladies at my new job, so it could also be super hot, but the odds tell me it is much, much more likely to be awkward.

Polago

Still in, and really busy right now.

B.C.

Ein, you could have attempted the Kayne Red Robe Gambit.

Polago

Six people left eh?

Would be interesting if there were cameras and a big brother house and challenges and sabotage and stuff.

"Oh hey guys today's challenge is 5 minute blowjobs. Don't blow or you're out!"