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I'm horrified right now.

Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Registered User, ClubPA regular
edited March 2008 in Singularity Engine++
I live in a one bedroom apartment, with another person. This other person happens to be my best friends girlfriends, they're both lesbians.

Last night, was the first time that they attempted to have sex. My room mate has never gone down on a girl before, she is asking me for pointers.

What the fuck do I do?

Auntie Shibby on
clowninthewoods.png
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Posts

  • Airking850Airking850 Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Give her some pointers...?

  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    explain to her that you've never gone down on a girl before either

    but tell her you have some tips if she goes straight

  • NotASenatorNotASenator Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Wait a minute, how many people are living in this apartment, how many bedrooms, and how many lesbians?

    I'm making an equation here.

  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    i am positive there is some porn for this

    I tried to write "but that" and my hands naturally wrote "butt hat", which is vastly superior in every way.
  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    number of lesbians + number of bedrooms + number of shibbies = number of shibbies + number of bedrooms (the lesbians leave because shibby is there)

  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Meowptimus Prime Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Tell her that the best way would be for you to go down on her and to record it for her to view later to see your techniques.

    meowoptimus.jpg
    Gamertag: PrimusD | Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
  • captainkcaptaink TexasRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Say you can't help her unless you see her technique first.

    sig.gifSteam | D3: captaink#1674 | 3DS: 2466-1914-7679
  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    are they attractive lesbians?

    this is important

    I tried to write "but that" and my hands naturally wrote "butt hat", which is vastly superior in every way.
  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    i know a lesbian

    she looks like a dude

  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2008
    Go down on your best friend in front of your roommate.

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  • DynagripDynagrip destroy everything you touch Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2008
    Why the heck would you share a one bedroom with someone?

    gusinrepose.png
  • thorgotthorgot Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    itt lesbians

    campionthorgotsig.jpg
  • Eastern GlowEastern Glow Registered User
    edited March 2008
    Does the other person sleep in the bathtub?

  • JordynJordyn Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Kovak wrote: »
    explain to her that you've never gone down on a girl before either

    but tell her you have some tips if she goes straight

    hahaha I'm writing this down.

    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • UbikUbik i am a god in a french-ass restaurantRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    By lesbians do you mean wiccans?

    CleezusSig_zpsfa821add.png
  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    give her a pointer

    in the vagina

    like with with your penis

  • SonnySonny Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Show her how you do things

    Untitled-1-1.gif
  • OmegaTofuNinjaOmegaTofuNinja Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    You could uh

    hmm

    Facebook Wii: 7912 0299 8667 6601 I tweet sometimes Poetry?!
  • MonkeyfeetMonkeyfeet Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Worst brag thread ever?

    sig1.jpg
  • guruslothgurusloth Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    this thread makes me happy

    [EDIT] in my pants

    4445171660_a11796abb7_o.jpg
  • VorusVorus Registered User
    edited March 2008
    oh yeah well I have like 100 lesbian sex addicts my house right now so there

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Meta T. DustMeta T. Dust Registered User
    edited March 2008
    Tell her not to use foreign objects such as lamps, unless asked to.

    motherfuckingwar.png
  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Jordyn wrote: »
    Kovak wrote: »
    explain to her that you've never gone down on a girl before either

    but tell her you have some tips if she goes straight

    hahaha I'm writing this down.

    i thought it was funny too

    thank you for validating my post jordyn

  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    I tried to write "but that" and my hands naturally wrote "butt hat", which is vastly superior in every way.
  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    do you own a baseball bat

    y/n?

  • Bloods EndBloods End Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Take a hike in the woods and become a serial rapist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Monkeyfeet wrote: »
    Worst brag thread ever?
    That's impossible.

  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    guys i just realized i never got a birds and a bees speech from my parents

    i cant even fathom how it would work

    someone give me the birds and the bees speech

  • PerrsunPerrsun Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Obtain for yourself a Roast Beef footlong from Subway, as well as a Ham and Cheese sandwich from the restaurant/grocery/deli of your choosing.

    Use the H&C as a teaching tool for proper methods.

    Than bring me the Roast Beef because I am kinda hungry.

  • bowtiedsealbowtiedseal Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Kovak wrote: »
    guys i just realized i never got a birds and a bees speech from my parents

    i cant even fathom how it would work

    someone give me the birds and the bees speech

    my mom tried to give me the talk when I was in the car and we were driving somewhere like half an hour away

    I just said "we're not having this conversation" and then she said "okay"

  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    im mostly just curious as how birds and bees can relate to sex

  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Kovak wrote: »
    im mostly just curious as how birds and bees can relate to sex

    ask bel

    i'm sure she could draw it up

    I tried to write "but that" and my hands naturally wrote "butt hat", which is vastly superior in every way.
  • thorgotthorgot Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Kovak wrote: »
    im mostly just curious as how birds and bees can relate to sex

    same way the stork can

    the stork also confuses me, though

    campionthorgotsig.jpg
  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    i think this all leads to furries

  • RedeemerRedeemer Registered User
    edited March 2008
    Kovak wrote: »
    guys i just realized i never got a birds and a bees speech from my parents

    i cant even fathom how it would work

    someone give me the birds and the bees speech

    When a man and a man love each other very much, like me and your dad...

    25jyxzr.jpg
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2008
    I've also never had the birds and bees talk. I think I turned out alright.

    clowninthewoods.png
  • KovakKovak did a lot of drugs married cher?Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    fuck seriously someone give me the birds and bees speech

    i dont wanna be him

  • captainkcaptaink TexasRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Kovak wrote: »
    i think this all leads to furries

    Lesfur? Horrifying.


    All them catgirls, having their catgirl sex. D:

    sig.gifSteam | D3: captaink#1674 | 3DS: 2466-1914-7679
  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Kovak wrote: »
    i think this all leads to furries
    It seems that everything leads to furries.

    Ringo wrote: »
    Well except what see317 said. That guy's always wrong.
  • MonkeyfeetMonkeyfeet Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    I tried to find you the WKUK sketch where Trevor tells a boy in the park about the birds and bees.

    "So you pee in her?"
    "Yep"
    "Then a baby comes out in nine months?"
    "Yep"
    "Thats gross"
    "Yeah it is"

    sig1.jpg
«134567
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