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Stupid shit people do with their kids

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Posts

  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    It doesn't carry over through text very well.

    penguins.png
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    who here has honestly not threatened to behead a cartoonist once or twice in their lifetime

    buckley etc...

    STEAM
    Spoiler:
  • ProjeckProjeck Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    i woke up, and there is lotion next to my computer

    i think someone is planting evidence

    m6eoUgQ.jpg
  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    who here has honestly not threatened to behead a cartoonist once or twice in their lifetime

    buckley etc...

    buckley.png

    penguins.png
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    who here has honestly not threatened to behead a cartoonist once or twice in their lifetime

    buckley etc...

    buckley.png

    you're a beautiful man

    STEAM
    Spoiler:
  • KingAgamemnonKingAgamemnon Registered User
    edited May 2008
    Projeck wrote: »
    i woke up, and there is lotion next to my computer

    i think someone is planting evidence

    it was your junk

    he's taken your abuse lone enough

    he's been a readin' and gots all these fancy new ideas

  • DaricDaric Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Projeck doesn't need lotion to diddle her pooter.

    cc61181c22f23454a304a4f1f0867845044.gif
  • ProjeckProjeck Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
  • Volucrisus AedriusVolucrisus Aedrius Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    who here has honestly not threatened to behead a cartoonist once or twice in their lifetime

    buckley etc...

    buckley.png

    Laughed so fucking hard at this.

    Oh my god my face feels hot to the touch it was so red.

    :^: :^: ::^:

    Dex Dynamo wrote: »
    Keith wrote:
    What would be your ultimate slam dunk??
    I would dunk it so hard my parents would love each other again
  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Well, I try.

    penguins.png
  • BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    No Projeck, you're just a heavy sleeper.


    Just let that sink in a little bit.

    Battletag BYToady#1454
  • Ragnar DragonfyreRagnar Dragonfyre Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Pony wrote: »
    Apparently a lot of the things my parents, especially my father, taught me and the way in which they taught me these things count as "abuse" these days.

    Example:
    I was 3. I liked to play with lighters. This was stupid, and dangerous. It was innocent, really. They were colorful and fire looked pretty. So I kept swiping my parents' lighters and playing with them, and when they kept taking them from me, I started hiding to play with them.
    This is stupidly motherfucking dangerous, of course, it means when I finally get the actual lighter to work I'll be in a closet or something and burn the whole house down. Plus I had no concept that fire was bad or could hurt anyone.

    My grandfather suggested to my parents that I simply needed "a good crack on the ass" (hitting was his solution to most problems with children) but my parents were very much against that idea. My mother didn't want to ever have to hit her children, and my father (rightly) understood that would just make me fear getting caught instead of making me stop doing it, I'd just get sneakier.

    So, instead, one day my father takes one of those Bic lighters and, with me out of sight, lights it and turns it upside down so the metal tip of it heats up to motherfucking hot. He then leaves it on the kitchen table, and goes to start cooking.

    I enter the kitchen a little bit later, and I see an unattended pretty blue lighter on the table. I reach for it, and my dad sees me and is like "No. Don't touch that. It is hot."

    I look at him, watch to see if he's gonna stop me, and then try to grab it anyway.

    I burn my hand. For the first time in my tiny life, I experience the fucking pain of burning. Naturally, being a new and unexpected pain, it is the most painful thing ever and I scream and cry. My father scoops me up, checks the burn (it's extremely minor), runs it under water, calms me down.

    He picks up the lighter, shows it to me and says "See? Hot! Don't touch!"

    He then walks over to the stove and shows me the orange burner "This is hot. Do you want to touch it?"
    I am like no way!

    So he puts me down and says "So, when we tell you it is hot, do not touch it, okay?" and I said okay.

    The fact that I have vivid memories of this event when I was 3 years old means it was a pretty effective lesson, I'd say.

    But apparently, some people see that as abusive parenting.

    On my first day of grade one (I had moved to a new school), my dad drove me to school. Just before I got out of the car, he leans in close to me and says in a very low tone "If I ever catch you smoking, I'll disown you."

    I never started smoking. I guess it worked. lol

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  • Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2008
    knowing how to say hamburguesa, cerveza and baño does not mean you can talk about them

    "DONDE ESTA FUCKING BANO."

    YO QUIERO UNA CERVEZA DICKWEED

  • Spectre-xSpectre-x Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Wait.

    Hold the fucking phone.

    The Dutch have a navy?

    they're coastal

    why wouldn't they

    Because they've got a shitty country. Who would attack the dutch? I mean seriously.

    All they're good for is... a lot of stuff Germany does better.

    Oh, and they also from time to time poke the hornet's nest of Islam with a Muhammad cartoon.

    I mean, hell, if Farside is to be believed they made a penguin an officer. My list of "reasons the dutch deserve a navy" is coming up short.

    The Dutch are the foremost innovators in water-related technology. We had god damn fucking better be, since half the fucking country is situated below sea level.

    But yeah, if you need antyhign big having to do with water built, like a series of canals or fancy sluice gates or a way to stop Venice from sinking, you come to the Dutch. We build shit to last, motherfucker.

    Also we've got it pretty good as far as human rights go here. Much better than in America, for instance.

    We've also been renowned explorers and traders in centuries past, and we helped lay the foundations of today's economy.

    We've also got the second-busiest port in the world, that being Rotterdam. Shanghai is the busiest now, but Rotterdam is still the busiest in Europe.

    Sig_link_image.jpg
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    This could be Rotterdam or anywhere
    Liverpool or Rome
    'Cause Rotterdam is anywhere
    Spoiler:

    sharasugar_80.png sharanomsugar_80.png
  • ProlegomenaProlegomena Frictionless Spinning The VoidRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Spectre-x wrote: »
    Wait.

    Hold the fucking phone.

    The Dutch have a navy?

    they're coastal

    why wouldn't they

    Because they've got a shitty country. Who would attack the dutch? I mean seriously.

    All they're good for is... a lot of stuff Germany does better.

    Oh, and they also from time to time poke the hornet's nest of Islam with a Muhammad cartoon.

    I mean, hell, if Farside is to be believed they made a penguin an officer. My list of "reasons the dutch deserve a navy" is coming up short.

    The Dutch are the foremost innovators in water-related technology. We had god damn fucking better be, since half the fucking country is situated below sea level.

    But yeah, if you need antyhign big having to do with water built, like a series of canals or fancy sluice gates or a way to stop Venice from sinking, you come to the Dutch. We build shit to last, motherfucker.

    Also we've got it pretty good as far as human rights go here. Much better than in America, for instance.

    We've also been renowned explorers and traders in centuries past, and we helped lay the foundations of today's economy.

    We've also got the second-busiest port in the world, that being Rotterdam. Shanghai is the busiest now, but Rotterdam is still the busiest in Europe.

    faggots and women don't matter so we still win

    STEAM
    Spoiler:
  • Muse Among MenMuse Among Men Suburban Bunny Princess? Its time for a new shtick Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    l'autobus?

    That's french

    It's also italian. I've been taking the class since september, I don't see why people complain so much about it, it's easy (especially if you speak spanish, which many of the failing students in the class do).

    I intend to take a second language next year, it'll either be Japanese or Cambodian.

  • Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2008
    Autobus is also Spanish for bus

  • bowtiedsealbowtiedseal Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    l'autobus?

    That's french

    It's also italian. I've been taking the class since september, I don't see why people complain so much about it, it's easy (especially if you speak spanish, which many of the failing students in the class do).

    I intend to take a second language next year, it'll either be Japanese or Cambodian.

    your school teaches khmer?

  • Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS
    edited May 2008
    Huh

    I had no idea

    We don't even have a spanish class at my school

  • Muse Among MenMuse Among Men Suburban Bunny Princess? Its time for a new shtick Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    l'autobus?

    That's french

    It's also italian. I've been taking the class since september, I don't see why people complain so much about it, it's easy (especially if you speak spanish, which many of the failing students in the class do).

    I intend to take a second language next year, it'll either be Japanese or Cambodian.

    your school teaches khmer?

    As of now there is only Italian and Spanish. Next year they are bringing in Japanese. The year after, French, Latin, and German.

  • bowtiedsealbowtiedseal Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    so you would be taking classes for cambodian outside of school?

    edit: I'm sort of curious why you would want to be learning khmer

  • Muse Among MenMuse Among Men Suburban Bunny Princess? Its time for a new shtick Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    No I just got confused at to wether it would be Japanese or Cambodian.

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