Vanilla Forums has been nominated for a second time in the CMS Critic "Critic's Choice" awards, and we need your vote! Read more here, and then do the thing (please).
Our new Indie Games subforum is now open for business in G&T. Go and check it out, you might land a code for a free game. If you're developing an indie game and want to post about it, follow these directions. If you don't, he'll break your legs! Hahaha! Seriously though.
Our rules have been updated and given their own forum. Go and look at them! They are nice, and there may be new ones that you didn't know about! Hooray for rules! Hooray for The System! Hooray for Conforming!

The Virginity Fetish

2456789

Posts

  • KungFuKungFu Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Feral wrote: »
    Gafoto wrote: »
    Feral wrote: »
    It's good old-fashioned misogynism.

    This is what it boils down to. A woman is only as good as her purity in most cultures. I think the expectation of virginity is somewhat more relaxed in the United States but I can't say I would be surprised if this operation was done frequently here.

    Well, it's not like we're having father-daughter proms celebrating girls' virginities.

    Oh wait.

    What? :O

    I am ignorant of these celebrations.

    Theft 4 Bread
  • DocDoc Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    KungFu wrote: »
    Feral wrote: »
    Gafoto wrote: »
    Feral wrote: »
    It's good old-fashioned misogynism.

    This is what it boils down to. A woman is only as good as her purity in most cultures. I think the expectation of virginity is somewhat more relaxed in the United States but I can't say I would be surprised if this operation was done frequently here.

    Well, it's not like we're having father-daughter proms celebrating girls' virginities.

    Oh wait.

    What? :O

    I am ignorant of these celebrations.

    http://www.generationsoflight.org/
    http://www.purityball.com/

  • FeralFeral Who needs a medical license when you've got style? Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    KungFu wrote: »
    Feral wrote: »
    Gafoto wrote: »
    Feral wrote: »
    It's good old-fashioned misogynism.

    This is what it boils down to. A woman is only as good as her purity in most cultures. I think the expectation of virginity is somewhat more relaxed in the United States but I can't say I would be surprised if this operation was done frequently here.

    Well, it's not like we're having father-daughter proms celebrating girls' virginities.

    Oh wait.

    What? :O

    I am ignorant of these celebrations.

    AngelHedgie's lolfundies-thread-of-the-week a few weeks back

    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.
    the "no true scotch, man" fallacy.
  • UnderdogUnderdog Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Variable wrote: »
    imagine if there was a way to tell if a male was a virgin. I wonder if it would even matter.

    I think it might matter in reversed sense. Like, if a guy still had his virginity after a certain age, he'd get ridiculed. Cuz, y'know, he's not a man yet.

    159.jpg
  • AdrienAdrien Registered User
    edited June 2008
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    There are two types of "woo, virgin!" mentality in the US. One is the "Ha ha, I conquered that fuckin' snatch, oh yeah!" type which is pretty bizarre, and is probably a combination of misogyny, fear of other dudes' wang-cooties, and the sense that you were able to get some chick to spread 'em when nobody else could.

    But there's also the idea of being someone's "first" which is a little tamer and sort of romantic. It's the idea that in some girl's (or boy's) entire life, you were the first one that she cared about enough to open up to (no pun intended). It's especially poignant if it's a mutual thing - it's the idea of two people in love exploring a fairly delicate and, to them, probably scary thing together. So I don't think that the "virginity fetish" is always a creepy thing. Just usually.

    Mmm, I would say it always indicates emotional imaturity. But your point is taken in that it could be inexperienced immaturity rather than sleazy immaturity.

    tmkm.jpg
  • JacobkoshJacobkosh Gamble a stamp. I can show you how to be a real man!Super Moderator, Moderator mod
    edited June 2008
    Adrien wrote: »
    Qingu wrote: »
    And this is where virginity enters the picture—it is a proof of purchase. A father would have a much harder time selling a non-virgin daughter because she is "damaged goods"; in fact this is probably why the Bible allows fathers to sell their daughters into slavery.

    Here's where I think the misogyny runs deeper than you note-- the question is, why is a non-virgin "damaged goods"?

    Well, the original reason was that, in the days before paternity tests, a dude wanted an ironclad guarantee that any kids issued from the marriage were his and his alone. This could be attributed to biology, patriarchal property inheritance laws, or simple human jealousy, depending on who's answering the question.

  • AdrienAdrien Registered User
    edited June 2008
    Jacobkosh wrote: »
    Well, the original reason was that, in the days before paternity tests, a dude wanted an ironclad guarantee that any kids issued from the marriage were his and his alone. This could be attributed to biology, patriarchal property inheritance laws, or simple human jealousy, depending on who's answering the question.

    I don't buy it. Firstly, you only have to wait a month at the most to find out if your bride-to-be is pregnant. Secondly, there's no reason your wife can't sleep with someone else after you break her hymen. If the whole virginity fiasco is about paternity, it's a stupid system that doesn't work.

    tmkm.jpg
  • TheMarshalTheMarshal Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Adrien wrote: »
    Jacobkosh wrote: »
    Well, the original reason was that, in the days before paternity tests, a dude wanted an ironclad guarantee that any kids issued from the marriage were his and his alone. This could be attributed to biology, patriarchal property inheritance laws, or simple human jealousy, depending on who's answering the question.

    I don't buy it. Firstly, you only have to wait a month at the most to find out if your bride-to-be is pregnant. Secondly, there's no reason your wife can't sleep with someone else after you break her hymen. If the whole virginity fiasco is about paternity, it's a stupid system that doesn't work.

    What makes you think that this is supposed to make any sense whatsoever?

  • anableanable Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I come from an "old-fashioned" family, and perhaps the only different point of view I can offer on this is that I have some problems with the girl I date not being a virgin.

    But first, let me say that I agree with everything I see typed here. It's sexist, unfair and disgusting.

    What I mean is that, (and I assume this is the same on the woman side) I have a problem knowing that the girl has been with another man before. I never say anything about it, because I've done the same thing, but the thought of the woman I love being with someone else makes my stomach turn to where I almost get sick. That doesn't mean what she did is wrong, AT ALL. I would only hope that the idea of me with another woman would bother her to the same degree.

    But what I'm seeing above is probably just the utmost extreme version of that.

    I've only dated one virgin in my time, and I'm still with her, but there was a comfort to the idea of knowing that I was her first. It just doesn't exist with other "non virgin" women. I don't know if the reverse is true for women, if not, then that is also an unfair double standard.

    Am I reading this wrong or are you saying that you've been with multiple women but the idea that your current (former?) virgin girlfriend be with another man makes you sick to your stomach? I sure hope you realize the hypocrisy of this.

    Edit: What I meant say is if it bothers you, why didn't you wait for marriage and instead take the virginity of someone who it doesn't sound like you're married to.

  • ElJeffeElJeffe Super Moderator, Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited June 2008
    Adrien wrote: »
    Mmm, I would say it always indicates emotional imaturity. But your point is taken in that it could be inexperienced immaturity rather than sleazy immaturity.

    Well, sure. But emotional immaturity amongst a couple of awkward teens in love is more "awwwww" than "ewwwww".

    Maddie: "I named my feet. The left one is flip and the right one is flop. Oh, and also I named my flip-flops."

    I make tweet.
  • AdrienAdrien Registered User
    edited June 2008
    TheMarshal wrote: »
    Adrien wrote: »
    Jacobkosh wrote: »
    Well, the original reason was that, in the days before paternity tests, a dude wanted an ironclad guarantee that any kids issued from the marriage were his and his alone. This could be attributed to biology, patriarchal property inheritance laws, or simple human jealousy, depending on who's answering the question.

    I don't buy it. Firstly, you only have to wait a month at the most to find out if your bride-to-be is pregnant. Secondly, there's no reason your wife can't sleep with someone else after you break her hymen. If the whole virginity fiasco is about paternity, it's a stupid system that doesn't work.

    What makes you think that this is supposed to make any sense whatsoever?

    I'm saying if that was the reason they wouldn't do it. I don't believe that's the reason.

    tmkm.jpg
  • DracilDracil Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    A girl friend said most girls would rather be with a non-virgin guy because it would probably be easier for the girl and sex is supposed to be fun and what's the fun with being with a "bumbling nervous wreck"

    So I asked her if that means she wants guys to go around having sex with girls, and she said no.

    WTF. Where are the fun non-virgin guys gonna come from then?

  • DocDoc Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    Dracil wrote: »
    WTF. Where are the fun non-virgin guys gonna come from then?

    There's just one, and he's selected in a national lottery.

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Dracil wrote: »
    A girl friend said most girls would rather be with a non-virgin guy because it would probably be easier for the girl and sex is supposed to be fun and what's the fun with being with a "bumbling nervous wreck"

    So I asked her if that means she wants guys to go around having sex with girls, and she said no.

    WTF. Where are the fun non-virgin guys gonna come from then?

    Rape.

  • DarkCrawlerDarkCrawler Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Preacher wrote: »
    Or how I read a story and felt like the whole world is full of fucking morons.

    http://www.slate.com/id/2193353/

    Seriously there are people out there who its so important for a woman to have her virginity they have to go to a doctor to get a fake hymen? You have got to be shitting me. Is there some actual valid reason for this other then insanity?

    ...but...but this surgery doesn't change the fact that they aren't virgins anymore. They have had sex already. o_O

    This is a new definition of illogical.

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Preacher wrote: »
    Or how I read a story and felt like the whole world is full of fucking morons.

    http://www.slate.com/id/2193353/

    Seriously there are people out there who its so important for a woman to have her virginity they have to go to a doctor to get a fake hymen? You have got to be shitting me. Is there some actual valid reason for this other then insanity?

    ...but...but this surgery doesn't change the fact that they aren't virgins anymore. They have had sex already. o_O

    This is a new definition of illogical.

    But it can save their life dark. It's crazy they have to have surgery in secret for fear of being killed for having the audacity to be a human being and have sex.

  • Nova_CNova_C Sniff Sniff Snorf Beyond The WallRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Preacher wrote: »
    Or how I read a story and felt like the whole world is full of fucking morons.

    http://www.slate.com/id/2193353/

    Seriously there are people out there who its so important for a woman to have her virginity they have to go to a doctor to get a fake hymen? You have got to be shitting me. Is there some actual valid reason for this other then insanity?

    ...but...but this surgery doesn't change the fact that they aren't virgins anymore. They have had sex already. o_O

    This is a new definition of illogical.

    Not really. It makes perfect sense when not being a virgin can get you killed, or, at least ostracized from your society. And time and again we've seen that there's a lot men who will badmouth women they have sex with.

    So get the surgery. New husband thinks you were a virgin because your blood is staining the sheets. Life goes on. I think this shows just how idiotic the virgin fetish inthat all it takes to fool the one who's doing the penetrating is a simple bit of flesh.

    My blog: www.jonathanirons.net
    My Twitter: IronBorealis
    Be advised, I'm not the best at keeping either updated. >.>
  • DracilDracil Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Also, as an aside to that two virgins and romance thing above, there IS something to be said about not having to worry about STDs at all if both partners begin and stay with each other.

    But if they don't, now that they're no longer virgins, then there is ALSO something to be said about exploring and finding out what you like and don't like.

  • DarkCrawlerDarkCrawler Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Whoops, I misunderstood. I thought it was their husbands wanting to get this surgery for their future wives in order to marry a "virgin"...


    ...which probably tells how low of an opinion I have about humanity.

  • HeirHeir Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Adrien wrote: »
    Mmm, I would say it always indicates emotional imaturity. But your point is taken in that it could be inexperienced immaturity rather than sleazy immaturity.

    Well, sure. But emotional immaturity amongst a couple of awkward teens in love is more "awwwww" than "ewwwww".

    Wait, so it's emotionally immature to wait until marriage for sex?

    My wife and I both were virgins when we married by choice. Mostly for religious reasons. I don't really have much else to offer to this thread, other than it should be a personal choice for each person involved.

    camo_sig2.png
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Whoops, I misunderstood. I thought it was their husbands wanting to get this surgery for their future wives in order to marry a "virgin"...


    ...which probably tells how low of an opinion I have about humanity.

    I'm sure thats there too. I recall a story about a 30 something woman doing that for an anniversary gift for her husband. Which while silly is no worse then breast implants.

    The women in the story I linked are doing it out of fear of being killed. I have to wonder though, what if they get this surgery and the guy who had sex with them comes out and says he did? I mean what then?

  • HeirHeir Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Preacher wrote: »
    Whoops, I misunderstood. I thought it was their husbands wanting to get this surgery for their future wives in order to marry a "virgin"...


    ...which probably tells how low of an opinion I have about humanity.

    I'm sure thats there too. I recall a story about a 30 something woman doing that for an anniversary gift for her husband. Which while silly is no worse then breast implants.

    The women in the story I linked are doing it out of fear of being killed. I have to wonder though, what if they get this surgery and the guy who had sex with them comes out and says he did? I mean what then?


    To make it even worse, I imagine in many of those cultures even if he was lying he would be believed over the woman.

    camo_sig2.png
  • Nova_CNova_C Sniff Sniff Snorf Beyond The WallRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Heir wrote: »
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Adrien wrote: »
    Mmm, I would say it always indicates emotional imaturity. But your point is taken in that it could be inexperienced immaturity rather than sleazy immaturity.

    Well, sure. But emotional immaturity amongst a couple of awkward teens in love is more "awwwww" than "ewwwww".

    Wait, so it's emotionally immature to wait until marriage for sex?

    My wife and I both were virgins when we married by choice. Mostly for religious reasons. I don't really have much else to offer to this thread, other than it should be a personal choice for each person involved.

    How'd you get that out of what he said? That's quite a leap from "People who are virgins are inexperienced" to "People who chose to wait until marriage to have sex are immature". I mean, they're not even close.

    My blog: www.jonathanirons.net
    My Twitter: IronBorealis
    Be advised, I'm not the best at keeping either updated. >.>
  • redxredx East Bumblefuck, PARegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Preacher wrote: »
    The women in the story I linked are doing it out of fear of being killed. I have to wonder though, what if they get this surgery and the guy who had sex with them comes out and says he did? I mean what then?

    she'd probably be killed, but it's better than being a spinster who's a burden for her parents to bear.

    All I've got is a snuggle hammer.
  • HeirHeir Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Nova_C wrote: »
    Heir wrote: »
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Adrien wrote: »
    Mmm, I would say it always indicates emotional imaturity. But your point is taken in that it could be inexperienced immaturity rather than sleazy immaturity.

    Well, sure. But emotional immaturity amongst a couple of awkward teens in love is more "awwwww" than "ewwwww".

    Wait, so it's emotionally immature to wait until marriage for sex?

    My wife and I both were virgins when we married by choice. Mostly for religious reasons. I don't really have much else to offer to this thread, other than it should be a personal choice for each person involved.

    How'd you get that out of what he said? That's quite a leap from "People who are virgins are inexperienced" to "People who chose to wait until marriage to have sex are immature". I mean, they're not even close.


    Ah, yeah after rereading it you're right. I just saw "immaturity" and missed the whole "inexperienced" part in front of it.

    camo_sig2.png
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Super Moderator, Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited June 2008
    Heir wrote: »
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Adrien wrote: »
    Mmm, I would say it always indicates emotional imaturity. But your point is taken in that it could be inexperienced immaturity rather than sleazy immaturity.

    Well, sure. But emotional immaturity amongst a couple of awkward teens in love is more "awwwww" than "ewwwww".

    Wait, so it's emotionally immature to wait until marriage for sex?

    My wife and I both were virgins when we married by choice. Mostly for religious reasons. I don't really have much else to offer to this thread, other than it should be a personal choice for each person involved.

    Are you saying that being all freaked out about sex doesn't belie an emotional immaturity? It doesn't make you a bad person, it just makes you... emotionally immature. Like, say, 99% of awkward teens fooling around with sex.

    As to you and your wife, you were probably mature in most ways. When it comes to sex, you were emotionally immature by definition, because you had not yet experienced any of the emotions associated with sex. You cannot have, because you hadn't had sex.

    Maddie: "I named my feet. The left one is flip and the right one is flop. Oh, and also I named my flip-flops."

    I make tweet.
  • Double_FacesDouble_Faces Registered User
    edited June 2008
    anable wrote: »
    I come from an "old-fashioned" family, and perhaps the only different point of view I can offer on this is that I have some problems with the girl I date not being a virgin.

    But first, let me say that I agree with everything I see typed here. It's sexist, unfair and disgusting.

    What I mean is that, (and I assume this is the same on the woman side) I have a problem knowing that the girl has been with another man before. I never say anything about it, because I've done the same thing, but the thought of the woman I love being with someone else makes my stomach turn to where I almost get sick. That doesn't mean what she did is wrong, AT ALL. I would only hope that the idea of me with another woman would bother her to the same degree.

    But what I'm seeing above is probably just the utmost extreme version of that.

    I've only dated one virgin in my time, and I'm still with her, but there was a comfort to the idea of knowing that I was her first. It just doesn't exist with other "non virgin" women. I don't know if the reverse is true for women, if not, then that is also an unfair double standard.

    Am I reading this wrong or are you saying that you've been with multiple women but the idea that your current (former?) virgin girlfriend be with another man makes you sick to your stomach? I sure hope you realize the hypocrisy of this.

    Edit: What I meant say is if it bothers you, why didn't you wait for marriage and instead take the virginity of someone who it doesn't sound like you're married to.

    No, that any girl I'm with, virgin or not, being with another guy makes me sick to my stomach. I happen to be with a girl who I was her first, and it just doesn't come with that "other guys have touched her" thing... that's all.

    SSBB Code: 0258 9993 5495
  • Nova_CNova_C Sniff Sniff Snorf Beyond The WallRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Heir wrote: »
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Adrien wrote: »
    Mmm, I would say it always indicates emotional imaturity. But your point is taken in that it could be inexperienced immaturity rather than sleazy immaturity.

    Well, sure. But emotional immaturity amongst a couple of awkward teens in love is more "awwwww" than "ewwwww".

    Wait, so it's emotionally immature to wait until marriage for sex?

    My wife and I both were virgins when we married by choice. Mostly for religious reasons. I don't really have much else to offer to this thread, other than it should be a personal choice for each person involved.

    Are you saying that being all freaked out about sex doesn't belie an emotional immaturity? It doesn't make you a bad person, it just makes you... emotionally immature. Like, say, 99% of awkward teens fooling around with sex.

    As to you and your wife, you were probably mature in most ways. When it comes to sex, you were emotionally immature by definition, because you had not yet experienced any of the emotions associated with sex. You cannot have, because you hadn't had sex.

    He wasn't talking about that, though: "Wait, so it's emotionally immature to wait until marriage for sex?"

    Not even the same thing.

    My blog: www.jonathanirons.net
    My Twitter: IronBorealis
    Be advised, I'm not the best at keeping either updated. >.>
  • HeirHeir Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Heir wrote: »
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Adrien wrote: »
    Mmm, I would say it always indicates emotional imaturity. But your point is taken in that it could be inexperienced immaturity rather than sleazy immaturity.

    Well, sure. But emotional immaturity amongst a couple of awkward teens in love is more "awwwww" than "ewwwww".

    Wait, so it's emotionally immature to wait until marriage for sex?

    My wife and I both were virgins when we married by choice. Mostly for religious reasons. I don't really have much else to offer to this thread, other than it should be a personal choice for each person involved.

    Are you saying that being all freaked out about sex doesn't belie an emotional immaturity? It doesn't make you a bad person, it just makes you... emotionally immature. Like, say, 99% of awkward teens fooling around with sex.

    As to you and your wife, you were probably mature in most ways. When it comes to sex, you were emotionally immature by definition, because you had not yet experienced any of the emotions associated with sex. You cannot have, because you hadn't had sex.

    I don't know how we were freaked out about sex, but you're right that we were new to the emotional experience of it all. Guess it was just the word choice.

    camo_sig2.png
  • HeirHeir Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Nova_C wrote: »
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Heir wrote: »
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Adrien wrote: »
    Mmm, I would say it always indicates emotional imaturity. But your point is taken in that it could be inexperienced immaturity rather than sleazy immaturity.

    Well, sure. But emotional immaturity amongst a couple of awkward teens in love is more "awwwww" than "ewwwww".

    Wait, so it's emotionally immature to wait until marriage for sex?

    My wife and I both were virgins when we married by choice. Mostly for religious reasons. I don't really have much else to offer to this thread, other than it should be a personal choice for each person involved.

    Are you saying that being all freaked out about sex doesn't belie an emotional immaturity? It doesn't make you a bad person, it just makes you... emotionally immature. Like, say, 99% of awkward teens fooling around with sex.

    As to you and your wife, you were probably mature in most ways. When it comes to sex, you were emotionally immature by definition, because you had not yet experienced any of the emotions associated with sex. You cannot have, because you hadn't had sex.

    He wasn't talking about that, though: "Wait, so it's emotionally immature to wait until marriage for sex?"

    Not even the same thing.


    That is what I originally said. However, it was in response to something I had misread.

    camo_sig2.png
  • Nova_CNova_C Sniff Sniff Snorf Beyond The WallRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Oh, alrighty. Thought you were trying to pick a fight.

    My blog: www.jonathanirons.net
    My Twitter: IronBorealis
    Be advised, I'm not the best at keeping either updated. >.>
  • The CatThe Cat Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    anable wrote: »
    I come from an "old-fashioned" family, and perhaps the only different point of view I can offer on this is that I have some problems with the girl I date not being a virgin.

    But first, let me say that I agree with everything I see typed here. It's sexist, unfair and disgusting.

    What I mean is that, (and I assume this is the same on the woman side) I have a problem knowing that the girl has been with another man before. I never say anything about it, because I've done the same thing, but the thought of the woman I love being with someone else makes my stomach turn to where I almost get sick. That doesn't mean what she did is wrong, AT ALL. I would only hope that the idea of me with another woman would bother her to the same degree.

    But what I'm seeing above is probably just the utmost extreme version of that.

    I've only dated one virgin in my time, and I'm still with her, but there was a comfort to the idea of knowing that I was her first. It just doesn't exist with other "non virgin" women. I don't know if the reverse is true for women, if not, then that is also an unfair double standard.

    Am I reading this wrong or are you saying that you've been with multiple women but the idea that your current (former?) virgin girlfriend be with another man makes you sick to your stomach? I sure hope you realize the hypocrisy of this.

    Edit: What I meant say is if it bothers you, why didn't you wait for marriage and instead take the virginity of someone who it doesn't sound like you're married to.

    No, that any girl I'm with, virgin or not, being with another guy makes me sick to my stomach. I happen to be with a girl who I was her first, and it just doesn't come with that "other guys have touched her" thing... that's all.

    You still need to realise that you have a problem, and yes, you are being a hypocrite by doing to her exactly the same thing that, if it were another man, would freak you out.

    tmsig.jpg
  • AdrienAdrien Registered User
    edited June 2008

    No, that any girl I'm with, virgin or not, being with another guy makes me sick to my stomach. I happen to be with a girl who I was her first, and it just doesn't come with that "other guys have touched her" thing... that's all.

    Not to jump down your throat, but this is about as archtypically emotionally immature as you can get.

    tmkm.jpg
  • HeirHeir Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    The Cat wrote: »
    anable wrote: »
    I come from an "old-fashioned" family, and perhaps the only different point of view I can offer on this is that I have some problems with the girl I date not being a virgin.

    But first, let me say that I agree with everything I see typed here. It's sexist, unfair and disgusting.

    What I mean is that, (and I assume this is the same on the woman side) I have a problem knowing that the girl has been with another man before. I never say anything about it, because I've done the same thing, but the thought of the woman I love being with someone else makes my stomach turn to where I almost get sick. That doesn't mean what she did is wrong, AT ALL. I would only hope that the idea of me with another woman would bother her to the same degree.

    But what I'm seeing above is probably just the utmost extreme version of that.

    I've only dated one virgin in my time, and I'm still with her, but there was a comfort to the idea of knowing that I was her first. It just doesn't exist with other "non virgin" women. I don't know if the reverse is true for women, if not, then that is also an unfair double standard.

    Am I reading this wrong or are you saying that you've been with multiple women but the idea that your current (former?) virgin girlfriend be with another man makes you sick to your stomach? I sure hope you realize the hypocrisy of this.

    Edit: What I meant say is if it bothers you, why didn't you wait for marriage and instead take the virginity of someone who it doesn't sound like you're married to.

    No, that any girl I'm with, virgin or not, being with another guy makes me sick to my stomach. I happen to be with a girl who I was her first, and it just doesn't come with that "other guys have touched her" thing... that's all.

    You still need to realise that you have a problem, and yes, you are being a hypocrite by doing to her exactly the same thing that, if it were another man, would freak you out.

    This. Double Standards are no bueno.

    camo_sig2.png
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Super Moderator, Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited June 2008
    Yeah, being weirded out because some other guy has been defiling the holy hatchet wound means you have some issues, boy-o.

    Maddie: "I named my feet. The left one is flip and the right one is flop. Oh, and also I named my flip-flops."

    I make tweet.
  • MikeManMikeMan Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    If you have dated other people, then you've been with other girls, correct?

    So what you're saying is you can date multiple people over the course of your life, but your girlfriends can't have.

    You make me fucking sick. That's just ridiculous.

    HOW DO YOU FUCK UP BAGELS. YOU BOIL THE WATER. PUT IN THE NOODLES
  • AdrienAdrien Registered User
    edited June 2008
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Yeah, being weirded out because some other guy has been defiling the holy hatchet wound means you have some issues, boy-o.

    o_O

    tmkm.jpg
  • HeirHeir Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Adrien wrote: »
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Yeah, being weirded out because some other guy has been defiling the holy hatchet wound means you have some issues, boy-o.

    o_O

    Spoiler:

    ?

    camo_sig2.png
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Ok crazy hypothetical. What if your girlfriend had previously been a lesbian and been with multiple female partners, but you are her first male. Would that weird you out?

    For females same question.

  • DocDoc Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    Aside from the "hey awesome, I turned him/her back." aspect, that is.

This discussion has been closed.