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this morning can kiss my ass

123578

Posts

  • SeptusSeptus Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I've had my throat, and my nose burn, because the vomit decided to come out both ways.

    rodq.jpg
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    Hunter wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    Reminds me of the time I noticed the sink was full of water so I plunged my hand in to unplug it, turns out it was full of bleach. Delicious burning bleach.

    Some jackass at work did that with a sink full of industrial strength drain clog remover. Shit is like pure lye with a pH of like 13 and change. He had a chem burn from the tips of his fingers to his elbow that must have hurt far beyond excruciating.

    I had to develop a safety protocol to handle something like that and prevent it from happening again. My solution was to not use 1000x the amount of drain cleaner necessary and to leave a fucking note near the sink if you decide to fill it with horrific volumes of chemicals. I also developed a power point slide show about not sticking your hands in random, unidentified clear fluids in an industrial facility, because it could be water or it could be some caustic terror that will tear the flesh from your bones. It had pictures and everything.
    you should have made it like those drivers ed films where they show people dying horribly in car accidents to get the viewer's attention

    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    BigDes wrote: »
    Hunter wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    Reminds me of the time I noticed the sink was full of water so I plunged my hand in to unplug it, turns out it was full of bleach. Delicious burning bleach.

    Some jackass at work did that with a sink full of industrial strength drain clog remover. Shit is like pure lye with a pH of like 13 and change. He had a chem burn from the tips of his fingers to his elbow that must have hurt far beyond excruciating.

    I had to develop a safety protocol to handle something like that and prevent it from happening again. My solution was to not use 1000x the amount of drain cleaner necessary and to leave a fucking note near the sink if you decide to fill it with horrific volumes of chemicals. I also developed a power point slide show about not sticking your hands in random, unidentified clear fluids in an industrial facility, because it could be water or it could be some caustic terror that will tear the flesh from your bones. It had pictures and everything.

    Yeah, in my defense, I don't expect the toilet sink to ever be filled with bleach, the kitchen and utility room sink? Sure, but the toilet sink is where a man goes to wash the feces of his hands so he may enjoy a fine sandwich.


    Yeah, your own home is a different thing. I tried explaining that to the gentlemen who worked at the site. In a plant however, assume everything is a vat of toxic chemicals that will melt you. Because sometimes it is.

  • JimothyJimothy Not in front of the fox he's with the owlRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    As7 wrote: »
    Knob I'm glad you didn't die or become Mr. Clean or whatever.

    Though having Mr. Clean for a mod would have been cool.

    Knob, new av idea right here.

    Owlsig.jpg
  • I Am Not A BearI Am Not A Bear Registered User
    edited June 2008
    Not that it's identical to the above incident, but when I was high schoo, I worked at a McDonald's and a kid slipped next to the deep fryer and tried to grab something to retain his balance and ended up elbow deep in the deep fry oil.

  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    Meiz wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    Meiz wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    Like Knob says if it burns your throat, then on te way back up it will pour even more of its poisony goodness into your blood stream.

    So digesting it is a better idea?
    ever noticed that when you throw up your gastric acid burns your throat?
    aduh

    I've thrown up a couple of times due to food poisoning or digestive problems. I've never had a raw throat because of it. Hell, even afterwards I could light up a smoke and puff away.

    Your throat made of marmalade or something?
    oh ok you smoke so your throat is perpetually irritated and fucked so you can't tell the difference

    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Druhim wrote: »
    Hunter wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    Reminds me of the time I noticed the sink was full of water so I plunged my hand in to unplug it, turns out it was full of bleach. Delicious burning bleach.

    Some jackass at work did that with a sink full of industrial strength drain clog remover. Shit is like pure lye with a pH of like 13 and change. He had a chem burn from the tips of his fingers to his elbow that must have hurt far beyond excruciating.

    I had to develop a safety protocol to handle something like that and prevent it from happening again. My solution was to not use 1000x the amount of drain cleaner necessary and to leave a fucking note near the sink if you decide to fill it with horrific volumes of chemicals. I also developed a power point slide show about not sticking your hands in random, unidentified clear fluids in an industrial facility, because it could be water or it could be some caustic terror that will tear the flesh from your bones. It had pictures and everything.
    you should have made it like those drivers ed films where they show people dying horribly in car accidents to get the viewer's attention

    I have a safety sign generator program to make my own signage. My favorite is the crushed hand going through a gear with big bold type that says "Don't Put Your Hand In Machinery, It Will Really Hurt". I like to hang those up.

    I also made one with a man on fire running out a door that said "Glass Pouring In Progress So Don't Walk Through: WARNING - IT'S REALLY HOT". Some people don't enjoy my sense of humor.

  • BomanTheBearBomanTheBear Registered User
    edited June 2008
    Not that it's identical to the above incident, but when I was high schoo, I worked at a McDonald's and a kid slipped next to the deep fryer and tried to grab something to retain his balance and ended up elbow deep in the deep fry oil.
    you are my opposite, not a bear

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • DynagripDynagrip destroy everything you touch Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    some guys at my college put up a fake sign in the cafeteria.

    "due to circumstances beyond our control we are no longer able to provide potable drinking water."

    gusinrepose.png
  • WeaverWeaver send help pirates have meRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    There was a guy at SA that did this same thing except with hydrogen peroxide.

    ProfessionalandCommander_zps6c326307.jpg
  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    My sister didn't drink peroxide...however she washed her contact with it and then jammed it in her eye.


    The screaming was the stuff that haunts your dreams.

    snap02869.jpg "zip, i dunno what it is about you, but there's something very cat-like about your face. i can't really place it. like, a puma or something. you'd make a good mountain lion."
  • MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Weaver wrote: »
    There was a guy at SA that did this same thing except with hydrogen peroxide.

    Did his pubes turn yeller?

  • BomanTheBearBomanTheBear Registered User
    edited June 2008
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    My sister didn't drink peroxide...however she washed her contact with it and then jammed it in her eye.


    The screaming was the stuff that haunts your dreams.
    as the peroxide eats all life in your eye

    god, i can imagine that would hurt worse than getting stitches on your cornea

    with a mechanical pencil

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • PeasPeas Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Druhim wrote: »
    Meiz wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    Meiz wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    Like Knob says if it burns your throat, then on te way back up it will pour even more of its poisony goodness into your blood stream.

    So digesting it is a better idea?
    ever noticed that when you throw up your gastric acid burns your throat?
    aduh

    I've thrown up a couple of times due to food poisoning or digestive problems. I've never had a raw throat because of it. Hell, even afterwards I could light up a smoke and puff away.

    Your throat made of marmalade or something?
    oh ok you smoke so your throat is perpetually irritated and fucked so you can't tell the difference


    O boy it happened a quite a few times (throat burning) when I have to stay awake overnight. I will be sitting there typing and suddenly there was this nasty sweet(as in taste) burning sensation in my throat.

    ayanomekakucityactors_zpsc44c7e8c.png
  • PoorochondriacPoorochondriac Ah, man Ah, jeezRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    My sister didn't drink peroxide...however she washed her contact with it and then jammed it in her eye.


    The screaming was the stuff that haunts your dreams.

    Fuck that would hurt.

    God, I was cringing just reading that.

  • Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    wait what

    you aren't supposed to drink all purpose cleaner?

    because I just chug that shit like nobody's business

  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    that explains a lot

    I tried to write "but that" and my hands naturally wrote "butt hat", which is vastly superior in every way.
  • Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    I fucking knew someone was going to say that as i was typing it

    I didn't think it would be you though taters

    I mean it is a pretty lame joke

  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    you are a pretty lame joke

    I tried to write "but that" and my hands naturally wrote "butt hat", which is vastly superior in every way.
  • Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    no you are a pretty lame joke

  • SeptusSeptus Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    My sister didn't drink peroxide...however she washed her contact with it and then jammed it in her eye.


    The screaming was the stuff that haunts your dreams.

    Fuck that would hurt.

    God, I was cringing just reading that.

    I never messed with cleaners, but the last time I had my eyes dilated, for some reason, it made my eyes extraordinarily, monumentally dry. I was a dumb son of a bitch, and when I went to take out my contacts, I didn't wet my eyes first, so I basically scraped off a top layer of…eye. My eyes were in some serious pain, the entire night. It didn't matter if I kept them open or shut, nor how much saline I put in there. I think I must not have slept for more than about 5 minutes at a time.

    rodq.jpg
  • CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    My sister didn't drink peroxide...however she washed her contact with it and then jammed it in her eye.


    The screaming was the stuff that haunts your dreams.

    Fuck that would hurt.

    God, I was cringing just reading that.

    i did it like 2 weeks ago

    the fucking agony

    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
  • I Am Not A BearI Am Not A Bear Registered User
    edited June 2008
  • CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    the cleaner disinfectant that i use is basically peroxide

    i stumble into the bathroom at 3am, getting ready for work

    i didnt pay attention to what bottle i grabbed to wet the contacts in my eyes (i sleep with my contacts in)

    i am immediantly awakened by the searing pain in my eyeball

    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    well don't sleep with your contacts in, that's bad for your eyes anyway.

  • CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    well aduh

    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    My sister didn't drink peroxide...however she washed her contact with it and then jammed it in her eye.


    The screaming was the stuff that haunts your dreams.

    Fuck that would hurt.

    God, I was cringing just reading that.


    Yea, her eyesight is shit without the contacts and it was early in the morning. This was just before they started labeling the saline solution and peroxide with different color caps for contact rinses.


    She hit the floor screaming bloody murder.

    My old man and I bolt for the door thinking she's dying in there, but since it was the bathroom and she had just showered...she was feeling slightly exposed.

    To hear her tell it she was having a hard time picking if she should let us help or block the door. Eventually, between trying to claw her eye out and screaming for us not to kick the door down, she got a towel on her.

    It was insane.

    snap02869.jpg "zip, i dunno what it is about you, but there's something very cat-like about your face. i can't really place it. like, a puma or something. you'd make a good mountain lion."
  • DeaconBluesDeaconBlues __BANNED USERS
    edited June 2008
    420 DRINK BLEACH ERYDAY

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • RinderRinder Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    409 DRINK BLEACH ERYDAY

    obsidianspur.jpg
    -I am The Alpha and The Omega-
  • BomanTheBearBomanTheBear Registered User
    edited June 2008

    ZING

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Sara LynnSara Lynn Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    man I thought everyone knew not to puke if you swallow something toxic

    I guess it's not common knowledge

    either way glad you're not gonna die h5 bro

  • SzechuanosaurusSzechuanosaurus Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    BigDes wrote: »
    Hunter wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    Reminds me of the time I noticed the sink was full of water so I plunged my hand in to unplug it, turns out it was full of bleach. Delicious burning bleach.

    Some jackass at work did that with a sink full of industrial strength drain clog remover. Shit is like pure lye with a pH of like 13 and change. He had a chem burn from the tips of his fingers to his elbow that must have hurt far beyond excruciating.

    I had to develop a safety protocol to handle something like that and prevent it from happening again. My solution was to not use 1000x the amount of drain cleaner necessary and to leave a fucking note near the sink if you decide to fill it with horrific volumes of chemicals. I also developed a power point slide show about not sticking your hands in random, unidentified clear fluids in an industrial facility, because it could be water or it could be some caustic terror that will tear the flesh from your bones. It had pictures and everything.

    Yeah, in my defense, I don't expect the toilet sink to ever be filled with bleach, the kitchen and utility room sink? Sure, but the toilet sink is where a man goes to wash the feces of his hands so he may enjoy a fine sandwich.

    I've seen stuff on documentaries about bad restaurants that used stuff like that to clean toilets. Splash it all over the toilet bowl, don't bother to rinse it down. Lady sits down to poop. Stands back up sans thighs.

  • GravesGraves Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Hallo Spaceboy should be a slower song.

    Stupid remix.

    Usher wrote:
    Honey got a booty like pow pow pow
    Honey got some boobies like wow oh wow.
  • JimothyJimothy Not in front of the fox he's with the owlRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    man I thought everyone knew not to puke if you swallow something toxic

    I guess it's not common knowledge

    either way glad you're not gonna die h5 bro

    I don't think I knew that, or would have thought of that.

    But this is not a problem I have ever heard of actually happening.

    Owlsig.jpg
  • RinderRinder Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    man I thought everyone knew not to puke if you swallow something toxic

    I guess it's not common knowledge

    either way glad you're not gonna die h5 bro

    Funny how it went from "Throw that shit up!" to "Hold on a second that might be a bad idea".
    Oh how the times have changed.

    obsidianspur.jpg
    -I am The Alpha and The Omega-
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Super Moderator, Moderator mod
    edited June 2008
    just found this thread

    and all I gotta say is

    bwahahahahahaha

  • RedTideRedTide Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    You know what, I love Knob and I hope nothing bad comes of this.

    But in all fucking seriousness, this has to be the funniest thing I've read in a very, very long time.

  • MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Mysst wrote: »
    well don't sleep with your contacts in, that's bad for your eyes anyway.

    This is a gross understatement.

    I had hard contacts and made the mistake of sleeping with them on. Once I went to remove them, a lesion would form on my cornea due to lack of oxygen.

    It's really painful.

    Luckily your eye is the one organ on the body that can heal the quickest.

  • RinderRinder Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Rinder wrote: »
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    man I thought everyone knew not to puke if you swallow something toxic

    I guess it's not common knowledge

    either way glad you're not gonna die h5 bro

    Funny how it went from "Throw that shit up!" to "Hold on a second that might be a bad idea".
    Oh how the times have changed.
    No, whether or not you should induce vomiting is dependent on the chemical you swallowed. Check the bottle.

    Yeah, but the general rule of thumb has changed. Most chemicals now say to not induce vomiting..there are very few that suggest you do. This is in contrast to the trend seen a few decades ago. Basically it's just a better understanding of how the body reacts to poison. Throwing up doesn't really help remove the poison like it was once thought to. You are correct in that you should read the bottle to make sure whether or not to take an expectorant.

    obsidianspur.jpg
    -I am The Alpha and The Omega-
  • Sara LynnSara Lynn Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    get some Mr. Yuck stickers on that shit

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