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green porno (nsfw)

13

Posts

  • ThatDudeOverThereThatDudeOverThere MY FINEST CREATION oh nevermind it's deadRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    when I'm trying to get a guy's attention, often I'll engage him in a brief boxing match just before we go to his place
    Hot.

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    My Youtube My Steam SMITE IGN: TDOTCRFH4 come SMITE with me
  • WrenWren Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    lobster relationships seem kind of fucked up

    first she comes over to your place and pees everywhere then you beat her up (understandable at this point) which can end up with you eating the female.

    jesus christ

    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • Dely AppleDely Apple Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Polago wrote: »
    okay this has been one of my favorite topics of conversation for the better part of eight years -- lobster mating rituals

    I tried to find a good video but there aren't any good ones, really, so I will just copy this
    A female lobster can mate only just after she sheds her shell. Lobster society has evolved a complex, touching courtship ritual that protects the female when she is most vulnerable. When she is ready to molt, the female lobster approaches a male's den and wafts a sex "perfume" called a pheromone in his direction. Unlike a female moth, whose sex pheromone may attract dozens of random suitors, the female lobster does the choosing. She usually seeks out the largest male in the neighborhood and stands outside his den, releasing her scent in a stream of urine from openings just below her antennae. He responds by fanning the water with his swimmerets, permeating his apartment with her perfume. He emerges from his den with his claws raised aggressively. She responds with a brief boxing match or by turning away. Either attitude seems to work to curb the male's aggression. The female raises her claws and places them on his head to let him know she is ready to mate. They enter the den, and some time after, from a few hours to several days later, the female molts. At this point the male could mate with her or eat her, but he invariably does the noble thing. He gently turns her limp body over onto her back with his walking legs and his mouth parts, being careful not to tear her soft flesh. They mate "with a poignant gentleness that is almost human, " observes Dr. Atema. The male, who remains hard-shelled, inserts his first pair of swimmerets, which are rigid and grooved, and passes his sperm into a receptacle in the female's body. She stays in the safety of his den for about a week until her new shell hardens. By then the attraction has passed, and the couple part with hardly a backward glance.

    Such a tender relationship.

    Needs garlic butter.

    The story of our love really

    feets.jpg
  • RinderRinder Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Now I really don't want to eat lobster.

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    -I am The Alpha and The Omega-
  • KilljoyKilljoy __BANNED USERS
    edited July 2008
    Wren wrote: »
    lobster relationships seem kind of fucked up

    first she comes over to your place and pees everywhere then you beat her up (understandable at this point) which can end up with you eating the female.

    jesus christ

    would you really pass up a free lobster dinner?

    he's just doing the sensible thing

  • WrenWren Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I wouldn't want my place to smell like pee though

    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • KilljoyKilljoy __BANNED USERS
    edited July 2008
  • FalloutFallout GIRL'S DAY EVERY DAYRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    if a chick pissed all over my place i'd punch her ass too

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  • WrenWren Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Fallout wrote: »
    if a chick pissed all over my place i'd punch her ass too

    srsly

    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I love you're using the domain now :D

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  • GatsuiokiGatsuioki Registered User
    edited July 2008
    Female lobsters pee from their head?

    Trippy.

    Also, this Green Porno woman is absolutely insane. She must fuck like a jackrabbit.

    TDOT on Man vs Discovery Channel
    "Alright fuckers, I'm in charge now.

    From here on, every week is Shark Week."
  • Dely AppleDely Apple Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I'll fuck anything that mooooveees

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    feets.jpg
  • MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User
    edited July 2008
    In regards to the Antechinus

    Breeding occurs in winter (usually August–September) at a time when there is little food available in the environment, and in order to ensure breeding success, male antechinuses strip their body of vital proteins and also suppress the immune system so as to free up additional metabolic energy. In this way an individual male trades away long-term survival in return for short-term breeding success, and following the breeding season there is a complete die-off of physiologically exhausted males. Breeding is intensely competitive. Males produce large amounts of testosterone and mate-guarding occurs in the form of protracted copulation (up to twelve hours in some species).

    The females can store sperm for up to three days in specialized sperm-storage crypts in the ovary and do not ovulate until the end of the breeding season. Many litters have multiple paternity (i.e., several fathers contribute to a single litter). Females can live for 2–3 years. However, this is unusual, and most females die following the weaning of their first litter. Litters size depends on the number of teats in the pouch. There are as few as 4 teats, usually 8, and in some populations up to 10 can occur. It is currently unknown why teat number varies. However, it is likely that in food-poor environments selection has tended towards fewer teats so that there is a greater parental investment per offspring.

    do not ask for whom the snerd tolls
  • WallhitterWallhitter Registered User
    edited July 2008
    ...Tales From The Sperm-Storage Crypt

  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    god there's gotta be a good wam joke to be made involving the phrase "sperm-storage crypt"

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  • MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User
    edited July 2008
    However, it is likely that in food-poor environments selection has tended towards fewer teats so that there is a greater parental investment per offspring.

    :(

    do not ask for whom the snerd tolls
  • Macro9Macro9 Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Dely Apple wrote: »
    I'll fuck anything that mooooveees

    69198990_ph1.jpg

    That movie was so strange. Hell all of his movies are strange.

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  • KeithKeith Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    god there's gotta be a good wam joke to be made involving the phrase "sperm-storage crypt"

    they were going to make a "Tales from Kate's Sperm-Storage Crypt" but they just couldn't keep a host long enough

    (is that good)

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  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Keith wrote: »
    god there's gotta be a good wam joke to be made involving the phrase "sperm-storage crypt"

    they were going to make a "Tales from Kate's Sperm-Storage Crypt" but they just couldn't keep a host long enough

    (is that good)
    (that was pretty great)

    edit: (because it has a double-connotation involving a host/parasite relationship too)

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  • NuzakNuzak Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    there are those alligators that blow bubbles on each other to woo the other

    that's adorable too

  • ShankusuShankusu __BANNED USERS
    edited July 2008
    Killjoy wrote: »
    Wren wrote: »
    lobster relationships seem kind of fucked up

    first she comes over to your place and pees everywhere then you beat her up (understandable at this point) which can end up with you eating the female.

    jesus christ

    would you really pass up a free lobster dinner?

    he's just doing the sensible thing

    underappreciated post right hurr

  • edited July 2008
    greenPorno.jpg

    green porno

    a series of short videos about the reproductive habits of a handful of common insects, by isabella rossellini

    these may be the most fantastic things I've ever seen

    spider is my personal favorite; it is amazing how similar their reproductive habits are to my own!

    itt let's talk about the bizarre mating habits of insects and other things that have sex (but not you we don't want to hear about that)
    there was a program like this in the uk once, i can't remember what it was, but part of it they had like sex councilling sessions between two spiders and stuff it was like 'i want to have sex but she keeps trying to eat my head'

  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Nuzak wrote: »
    there are those alligators that blow bubbles on each other to woo the other

    that's adorable too
    you need to go into more detail here

    kQwcZLJ.png
  • RanxRanx Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    ranx they did

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  • I'd Fuck Chuck Lidell UpI'd Fuck Chuck Lidell Up Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I will dig my palpae in her epigyne!

    and run off!

    this is probably my favorite line of anything ever

    In the words of the ancients, one should make his decision within the space of seven breaths. It is a matter of being determined and having the spirit to break through to the other side
  • ThatDudeOverThereThatDudeOverThere MY FINEST CREATION oh nevermind it's deadRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Nuzak wrote: »
    there are those alligators that blow bubbles on each other to woo the other

    that's adorable too
    you need to go into more detail here

    yes

    nHu0VJL.png
    My Youtube My Steam SMITE IGN: TDOTCRFH4 come SMITE with me
  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    I want you all to know that season 2 of green porno is now online

    http://www.sundancechannel.com/greenporno/

    magnificent and educational

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  • NikolaiNikolai SSSSSSSSSSS Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    yeah wow this thread is pretty old huh

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  • StraightziStraightzi Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Also season two has been up forever

    And I think we already had another thread about it

  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    you're going to have to deal with the fact that I have updated my thread

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  • StraightziStraightzi Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Green porno is pretty neat

    So I guess I will

  • NikolaiNikolai SSSSSSSSSSS Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    haha oh my god, 52 seconds into whale sex one.

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  • BalefuegoBalefuego Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    bugs are gross

    i think this would give me nightmares

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    hey guys.

    hey nikolai. i think i'm going to get internet for me house

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  • NikolaiNikolai SSSSSSSSSSS Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Sup Futore, Long time no see you sexy man.

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  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited August 2009
    Balefuego wrote: »
    bugs are gross

    i think this would give me nightmares
    no

    green porno is the reason we have the internet

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