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Debate and Discourse: AWESOME POST in "No [chat]ting!", by Drez

DeShadowCDeShadowC Registered User regular
edited August 2008 in [2008-2012] Awesome Posts?
DeShadowC has reported a post.

Reason:
Maybe not the most awesome thing, but it made me laugh at a customer while reading it.
Forum: Debate and Discourse
Post: No [chat]ting!
Posted by: Drez


Original Content:
Richy wrote: »
Tav wrote: »
Drez wrote: »
Tav wrote: »
Drez wrote: »
I thought Ireland was perpetual drinking and eating potatoes.

How do you drink a potato?

You've obviously never heard of poteen.

No, thank God. In fact, I've stricken your post from my memory so even now I still haven't heard of it.

POTATO WHISKEY MADE IN THE MOUNTAINS THAT TURNS YOU BLIND.
That sounds like a location in the middle of a quest in an old fantasy book. "Follow the abandoned path across the plains of death, through the mountains that turn you blind, and over the river of disemboweled souls. It's a shortcut. Much faster than that new four-lane highway they just opened up."


Hmm.
> Take potato
Potato: Taken.

> Up
[B]Mountain Pass[/B]

You have entered the Mountain Pass.  You can see a still to the North.  Behind you, to the South, is the base of the mountain.

> West
Do you want to jump off the cliff?

> No
Okay.

> North
[B]Outside Potato Whiskey Still[/B]

You have arrived at an abandoned still.  Inside you can see a Frobozz-O-Matic Potato Whiskey Maker Machine 2000 inside the still.

Your elvish sword glows faintly blue.

> In
(Opening the still door.)

[B]Inside Potato Whiskey Still[/B]

You have entered the potato whiskey still.  On one table is a the Frobozz-O-Matic Potato Whiskey Maker Machine 2000.  You notice an orc sitting in one corner eating crumpets and sipping tea.

Your elvish sword glows bright blue.

> i

You are carrying:

- a torch
- a magical elvish sword which is glowing bright blue
- a potato
- a Betty Crocker recipe book
- a treatise
- a leaflet
- a clove of garlic
- a spellbook
- a parser nymph
- a voodoo-cursed, shrunken, petrified Zen Vulgarity
- a magical dwarven uzi
- a towel

> Make potato whiskey
(With potato.)

You approach the Frobozz-O-Matic Potato Whiskey Maker Machine 2000 and put the potato in the machine.  Immediately, the machine comes to life and in less than a minute, a paper cup containing potato whiskey materializes in front of the machine on the table.

> Take whiskey

You take the whiskey.  Suddenly, the orc leaps up and smashes you in both eyes with an uneaten crumpet.  You are blind.

Yep, you're right. Potato whiskey causes blindness.

DeShadowC on

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