School dance thread

Hacksaw

I never went to any school dances after my freshman year of high school. I could never get a date, and none of my friends wanted to go stag, so I figured why bother? I imagine this contributed to my existing frustrated bitterness in some small fashion.

Mysst

I didn't go to my senior prom because some motherfucker snitched on my weed smoking.

Graves

Women love me.

Outside of this town.

If I go to a club or on vacation there's always girls like 'Heyyyy' and around here they're like "he's cute... I guess... but he's so weird!"

Hacksaw

I still shy away from most school functions. Of course, my college is a private, sheltered Lutheran university that hates fun and tries to restrict it whenever possible.

Weaver

I worked on prom night, finished my shift, then drove and fucked my girlfriend next to the porch outside of her house.

Ah, Oklahoma.

Weaver

oh fuck you top of page

Leli

That's a pretty hot top of the page.

Weaver

We had a chair sitting on the side of the house next to the porch and she would ride me on it.

One time we hit it on top of her uncles cars hood in the driveway in the middle of the afternoon.

I love it when girls wear dresses with no panties.

Hacksaw

Weaver you have the best stories.

Leli

Hang on, let me get a pad of paper and a pen to take notes.

Weaver

Going to the grocery store

I'm only 29 I have to ration out my stories a bit at a time or I'll run out.

Leli

I don't think I'd ever be able to have sex outside with my boyfriend. I've told him that he's never getting road head again because every time we try it, he's all, "Wait wait wait, this car is passing us up and they might see," about every 2 minutes. Because of this, he never fucking finishes. So I said fuck it, you're never getting road head again.

Casper

what is so wrong if someone sees, unless they slow down and will not stop looking.

TrueHereticX

Year 10 formal was pretty shitty. Basically was a shield for this girl because my other friend was obsessed with her, and said a toast in a Scottish accent to my entire year.

Year 12 formal I invited the girl i was dating at the time, and she didn't even talk, eat or dance the entire night. Then she told me she had to go home (which was 4 hours away from the place) with her mum instead of spend the night with me. So i proceeded to get rip roaring drunk in the hotel, and slept in my good clothes.

Only other thing i went to was a Debutant (sp?) ball with my SO at the time where I got laid several times afterwards.

So yeah, my dance experience isn't the best

Graves

I've had sex outside like... twice?

I want to say twice.

Roof of my school, and pool.

Yeah.

Twice.

Dog

pools are never a fun time

Graves

Maybe not for you!

Leli

Oh wait, yeah. I've done it in a pool. Not with this guy though.

TrueHereticX

Sex outside?

Pool twice

Spa once

Tampoline once (Most uncomfortable thing ever)

Hammock once

Balcony of best friends house once

Yeah, I've had sex outside

Graves

I said no to the trampoline.

It even sounds like a bad idea.

zimfan

Heretic

which Robin Hood is that?

Bibble

sex on a trampoline hahahahaha

unf unf unf boing boing boing OW OH GOD MY HEAD JUST CRACKED OPEN ON A METAL BAR AAAAH

Dog

Graves wrote: »

Maybe not for you!

im a delicate flower

potatoe

Leli wrote: »

I don't think I'd ever be able to have sex outside with my boyfriend. I've told him that he's never getting road head again because every time we try it, he's all, "Wait wait wait, this car is passing us up and they might see," about every 2 minutes. Because of this, he never fucking finishes. So I said fuck it, you're never getting road head again.

what the?
part of the fun is that other people will see

Bibble

i had sex while base-jumping

sorry guys i win this one

Hacksaw

potatoe wrote: »

Leli wrote: »

I don't think I'd ever be able to have sex outside with my boyfriend. I've told him that he's never getting road head again because every time we try it, he's all, "Wait wait wait, this car is passing us up and they might see," about every 2 minutes. Because of this, he never fucking finishes. So I said fuck it, you're never getting road head again.

what the?
part of the fun is that other people will see

Seriously. Getting road head is all about showing off to other people.

"Nice Lexus. Don't mind me, I'm just getting my knob polished in my '99 Honda Civic."

potatoe

you either finished fast or that was a hell of a base-jump

Bibble

Bynokulars wrote: »

I broke up with a girl two months before my senior prom, after she had already bought the dress she planned to wear to it.

Apparently that is considered a dick move.

hahaa yeah i did that too

good times

Graves

Man, now I want to get on the ball and find some cool places to do it outside.

But it is getting ch-ch-chilly out!

Peter Ebel

I had sex while mainlining heroin and doing muay thai with grizzly bears.

Bibble

potatoe wrote: »

you either finished fast or that was a hell of a base-jump

our parachute got stuck on a lamp post so we had some extra time

though since we were naked it was kind of awkward calling the fire department to get us down

The_Scarab

Bibble wrote: »

Bynokulars wrote: »

I broke up with a girl two months before my senior prom, after she had already bought the dress she planned to wear to it.

Apparently that is considered a dick move.

hahaa yeah i did that too

good times

You people are utter bastards you know that.

Not gentlemen at all.

Bibble

The_Scarab wrote: »

Bibble wrote: »

Bynokulars wrote: »

I broke up with a girl two months before my senior prom, after she had already bought the dress she planned to wear to it.

Apparently that is considered a dick move.

hahaa yeah i did that too

good times

You people are utter bastards you know that.

Not gentlemen at all.

i felt pretty bad but

not really because jesus what a bitch

Graves

My girlfriend just yelled at me for stabbing her friend in the hand with a pencil

The_Scarab

Graves wrote: »

My girlfriend just yelled at me for stabbing her friend in the hand with a pencil

What a cunt. You should stab them both.

Hacksaw

Graves wrote: »

My girlfriend just yelled at me for stabbing her friend in the hand with a pencil

Dump her.

Graves

Stabbings for everyone!

But what had happened was that she was dressed as Jamie Lynn Spears for 'dress like a celebrity day' or some shit.

And she had a balloon under her shirt.

And I went to stab that balloon.

And she blocked it.

And she got a nice pencil stab wound.

the wook

I wore something along the lines of this to my school dances

George Fornby Grill

My school's homecoming dance is friday, there is a possibility I'll be DJing it if they can't find someone else to.
My plan is to just play the Girl Talk discography.

NotASenator

the wook wrote: »

I wore something along the lines of this to my school dances

Spoiler:

Wook had to stand still for 30 minutes while they exposed the film.