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How to go about finding ways to be social with new friends?
UnknownSaint
Registered User
Registered User
So this is a pretty precise social situation. I'm honestly not socially retarded, I would just like a nuanced way of going about this.
I just moved to a new town and know absolutely nobody here. I've made a few...acquaintenances from class, but there is really only one dude in particular I would actually begin to label as a friend. Have a few classes, we share the same major, and a little while back I ran into him and his group of friends outside of class multiple times, the last time this happened I ended up going to a reggae concert with them (o_o) and drinking in some hills in the next town over with about half a dozen really really cool people. I got along well with everyone, they all seemed to like me, at this point I consider myself somewhat 'in'.
Here's the issue. This was about three weeks ago, and despite having regular contact with the dude and him letting me know that if they actually do any group hanging out, that he'll give me a heads up so I can join in. He's aware that I really have nobody in this town, so it's been cool of him and his friends to let me in so easily.
The thing is, I think nothing has been happening (resulting in depressingly dull and lonely weekends alone in my apartment) not because I've been getting ignored (I'm pretty sure, at least), but because none of these people really have anywhere to hang out. Most of them are in their early to mid 20s and still live with their parents. In fact, I think not a single one of them actually has a place of their own. I even commented last time that they need to find some friends with houses, instead of meeting up in random spots like a bunch of high schoolers. Everyone laughed and totally agreed.
Y'see - I do have an apartment of my own. It's small, but it's more than accomodating for a small group of friends, and I would be totally happy to host and have a few people over just for drinks on a weekend night or something. What's a non-creepy way of letting them know that I'd be down to have them come over and hang out and be social at my place, without coming across as setting up some depressing awkward group playdate?
I just moved to a new town and know absolutely nobody here. I've made a few...acquaintenances from class, but there is really only one dude in particular I would actually begin to label as a friend. Have a few classes, we share the same major, and a little while back I ran into him and his group of friends outside of class multiple times, the last time this happened I ended up going to a reggae concert with them (o_o) and drinking in some hills in the next town over with about half a dozen really really cool people. I got along well with everyone, they all seemed to like me, at this point I consider myself somewhat 'in'.
Here's the issue. This was about three weeks ago, and despite having regular contact with the dude and him letting me know that if they actually do any group hanging out, that he'll give me a heads up so I can join in. He's aware that I really have nobody in this town, so it's been cool of him and his friends to let me in so easily.
The thing is, I think nothing has been happening (resulting in depressingly dull and lonely weekends alone in my apartment) not because I've been getting ignored (I'm pretty sure, at least), but because none of these people really have anywhere to hang out. Most of them are in their early to mid 20s and still live with their parents. In fact, I think not a single one of them actually has a place of their own. I even commented last time that they need to find some friends with houses, instead of meeting up in random spots like a bunch of high schoolers. Everyone laughed and totally agreed.
Y'see - I do have an apartment of my own. It's small, but it's more than accomodating for a small group of friends, and I would be totally happy to host and have a few people over just for drinks on a weekend night or something. What's a non-creepy way of letting them know that I'd be down to have them come over and hang out and be social at my place, without coming across as setting up some depressing awkward group playdate?
UnknownSaint on
Posts
Edit:
Thought of another one. "You play poker?"
This. Its a great idea, buy a crate of beer, get a poker set with some chips and suggest a poker night. It works with my friends and they're the biggest bunch of anti-social cave dwellers you'll ever meet.
He lives on as cheezburger grease in our hearts.
A cookout is a good idea (Ex. Beer + Grill = Cookout). Do it on a sunday and throw in football and I'm sure they would be glad to get out of their parents house.
Where do you live? Because this could change depending on weather.
(Edit: I see its riverside,CA)
I've been going to a regular game this year one of my friends hosts and have gotten to know a whole bunch of people I wouldn't have otherwise.
What are your common interests outside of school/work? Organize something around that (watch a game, play a game, cookout, movie, whateva)