The True North strong and free!
We just had an election a few weeks ago, did you know that?
The Conservatives maintained a minority government.
What is a minority government?
Is it when a minority takes over the government, like what happened down south?
No, silly. There aren't any minorities in Canada. They don't call it "The Great White North" for nothing.
Oh wait, gays are a minority, aren't they? Well, they don't matter, anyway. We gave them the right to get married, and in exchange, they've agreed to stay hidden away in their horrible gay grottoes.
Let's say that Canadians get to vote on which political party gets the most pie. Usually, one party gets a really big piece of pie, and gets to hold it over the other parties' heads and say, "Nyah nyah. We get to call all the shots now, because even if you combined all your pieces of pie it still wouldn't be bigger than our piece of pie, jerkfaces." But, in a minority government, the party in charge didn't get a really big piece of pie, and the other parties could very well combine their pieces of pie to form a bigger piece of pie than that of the leading party party pie pie canadian pie pie.
What are the political parties and who leads them?
They like things the way they used to be. They also like money.
(Holding 143 seats)
Lead by Stephen Harper
- Is our Prime Minister
- Is from Alberta (where all the oil and money money is)
- Is super pissed right now
They are the middle of the road, politically speaking.
(Holding 77 seats)
Lead by Stephane Dion
The New Democratic Party!
- Is the Leader of the Royal Opposition
- Will soon be ousted as leader of the Liberal Party
- Has a hard time speaking English
- Has got nothing
They are socialists. They love everything that Conservatives hate.
(Holding 37 seats)
Lead by Jack Layton
The Bloc Québécois!
- Has a moustache
- Likes bikes
- Hates [vidurl=
- Loves Asian women
They want Quebec to be its own nation. For 245 years these damn Frenchies have been pressured into accepting proud, proper, British based culture, but some of them are still holding out.
(Holding 49 seats)
Lead by Gilles Dueceppe
- Hates Canada
- Loves Quebec
- Speaks English better than Stephane Dion
- Reeks of fish
- Trent fucking hates the Bloc so much. "Also, under Bloc you should mention how they want to separate and be their own country but still get the billions of dollars in revenue from the rest of the country they aren't part of anymore."
the green party
(NO SEATS, SON)
The Green Party is yet another left-leaning political party, but they are distinct from other leftist parties for being fiscally conservative. Their main project is to help the environment, so it was rather convenient that green was still available.
The party is currently led by this fly woman right here
-Leader of the Greens
-Owns many scarves
If you would like to see our leaders go at it in the House of Commons, you can see the sessions at http://www.cpac.ca/
Did you know that The Liberals, The New Democrats and the Bloc Québécois hate Stephen Harper sooooo much that they are planning on forming a coalition to overthrow the Conservatives?
Well, they are.
The New Democrats and the Liberals have agreed to work together until 2011, if the government holds up that long.
The Bloc Québécois have agreed to support this coalition for 18 months.
Stephen Harper is going to try his very best to stop this unholy union from happening.
How is he going to do this?
Well, he could try to suspend parliament until January 26th, and let the whole situation cool off.
He could try to call an election.
He could cry a lot.
But, he's the Prime Minister. What do I mean by try
? Shouldn't he be able to just do this shit?
If he wants to call an election or suspend parliament he's gotta get approval from the Governor-General.
This sexy lady represents the Queen.
She is what keeps the Prime Minister in check when he tries to grab too much power.
Some parts of Canada are saying, "Hey, what the fuck? We voted the Conservatives in to lead us! This isn't cool!"
Other parts of Canada are saying, "YEEEEEEEAH! FUCK HARPER!"
What are YOU saying?
Rick Mercer rants.